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UPS is coming with a fleshlight to my house on Monday but my mom will be home too.
What do I say to her to not raise suspicion?
It's not like I'd be forbidden to have one but I still want to hide it.
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It's not like they're going to announce that it's a fleshlight to her. Why the fuck would you buy it online if you're so concerned about this anyway?
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>>17549314
I still have to say something about the package that won't make her suspicious,
I don't know about sex stores where i live, I'd have to travel a while and they probably don't have a lot of different ones. Also I didn't think she'd be home.
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She'll be very curious and ask what it is.
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If I were to move to Japan for studies next year, what are my chances of meeting a cute tomboy grill who likes me back?
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>>17547328
are you white?
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>>17547328
High chances of being in loan debt for the rest of your life.
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>>17547335
Honestly, this part is probably the deal breaker. I'm [spoiler]a Gook.[/spoiler]
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I don't expect this thread to go well at all, but here goes. I'm 29. I've never even tried initiating speaking to a girl before. As in, speaking to someone I didn't already know.
This is not something I did when I was younger, or even as I got older. It was a thing that I was not able to do. I had a very isolated childhood, teenhood, and young-adulthood. You wouldn't envy it.
I'm not a virgin but that's only because of meeting someone online, and that's not going to happen again.
I don't drink, and I don't have friends in the area.
I wanna state those two things again. I do not drink. I will not be drinking. No drink. And friends in the area. There are friends, but they are far away. I'm sorry to repeat those two things so much, but there are dumdums who ignore it.
I'm decent looking I guess. Distant friends say nice things about my appearance when they see me. And I'm not fat. But I am 5'7. I can't help but feel there's a level of experience that I'm expected to have by now, for women around my age range to respond well to the thing I'm trying to do. And if I'm gonna fail at it, I want to learn from it. So it can't be a no win scenario like trying to single one girl out of three (and this is most of what I see out there, at any of the places people normally suggest by the way.)
Given this situation, where do you begin? Where do you go? People suggest bookstores, libraries, and shit like that. Never any prospects happening there. I used to hang around these places a LOT.
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Halp me /adv/.
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>>17546687
Look into local things too do great way too meet people
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>>17546691
Yeah?
Anonymous
WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO ZIPLOK-CHAN? 2016-09-05 07:23:56 Post No.17534235
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WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO ZIPLOK-CHAN? 2016-09-05 07:23:56 Post No.17534235
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WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO ZIPLOK-CHAN?
Anonymous
2016-09-05 07:23:56
Post No. 17534235
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The Japanese guy who was trying to get his sister to have sex with him. His epic ran all last week, but I missed the end.
120 Posts / 15 Images
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>>17534235
He got together whith his childhood friend.
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>>17534248
yep.
Posted over on /a/ last night, but his posts got deleted.
>they went to Japan Sea World or w/e
>stayed at hotel
>had sex
Also, I asked him about the families getting together. He responded, but I never saw it.
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>>17535374
I copied it so here
So our families got together Sunday night which was the night we came back from Tokyo. They were just sitting at our apartment with Hana-nee and neither of us had any clue they were coming this early since we expected Monday. So naturally we were shocked when my little sister (her name is Kokono but we just call her Koko-chan) greeted me at the door.
Kanon-chan is an only child so her father pretty much didn't allow her to date at all which is why she spent so much time around me and my sister. He's a pretty scary guy since he has these large eyebrows that make him look angry all the time. Anyways, everyone greeted both of us.
Me and Kanon-chan walked in holding hands and she had her arm wrapped around my waist and was cuddling her cheek on top of my head so that was already a dead give away. Kanon-chan's father asked us in this kind of joking/scary way what happened while they were gone and left us alone. We had no choice so I went forward and said that me and Kanon-chan were dating now and kind of apologized for not telling them. Both of our mothers just said how cute it was that we were dating and how they always joked about it when we were kids. Her dad said he's happy it was at least me who was dating Kanon-chan and said that me, him, and my dad were going to need to talk to just me alone over some drinks and just gave me this half-hearted pat on the back
Koko-chan was hugging Kanon-chan and said that now Kanon-chan can become her real sister
We went out to dinner that night and it was mostly our moms just reminiscing about stuff. I made the mistake of letting loose to both of our dads that me and Kanon-chan stayed at a hotel together. Both of them didn't react but her dad just kind of nodded and didn't say much. My dad looked like he was trying not to laugh. I guess it's natural since they were friends since they were kids too
Anyways, it was fun/awkward. I'm not looking forward to drinking with both of our dads though
Anonymous
(Neet and Shut-in Advice Thread (Version 127) 2016-09-04 00:02:51 Post No.17529632
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(Neet and Shut-in Advice Thread (Version 127) 2016-09-04 00:02:51 Post No.17529632
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(Neet and Shut-in Advice Thread (Version 127)
Anonymous
2016-09-04 00:02:51
Post No. 17529632
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Welcome to the NEET and Shut-in advice thread!
(Version 127?, running since Oct. 31st, 2013)
REMINDER: This isn't >>>/r9k/ or wizardchan
Drop out of school due to anxiety? Haven't left the house in a few years? Maybe you have a job, but don't leave the house or talk to people for any reason outside of it? Finding a job sure is hard these days.
The best time to change your life was 5 years ago. But the good news is, the second best time is right now!
>NEETmap (don't forget your contact info)
https://www.zeemaps.com/map?group=1663835
>Chat
http://chat.mibbit.com/#[email protected]
>IRC help:
http://pastebin.com/Pi8EqVaX
>Conversation Starters and Past Topics:
http://pastebin.com/KFe5MQE2
>Helpful Links and Resources:
http://pastebin.com/ygPwDUk4
Anyone still around? I posted here last in 2014
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Not a NEET, but a shut in loser.
My life gets worse every single day. I'm debating killing myself tomorrow.
I find it so frustratingly difficult to make my decision however.
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>>17529644
Do it.
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My shitty normie brother makes the whole house smell like weed whenever there's no one home.
It's a constant source of tension. He's 6'3 and 300lbs, so when mom comes home and he insists he has no idea what that smell is she dosen't do anything.
Fucking kills me inside. Not my job to raise this kid.
What do I do boys
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I got a promotion at work after working hard and finally being recognized for it! I have more work to do technically (actually I was basically doing all of it already), but I got a raise!
I was finally going to be able to save up some money... but then my landlord raised my rent, and it basically wiped out all of the gain from my raise.
The fuck am I supposed to do.
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why the rent hike? can you find a less expensive place to live that's still decently close to work?
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>>17552067
Try and find a new place to live
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>>17552074
>>17552073
because my apartment was pretty cheap compared to my city. There's really nowhere else to live, and I already commute for like an hour (thanks traffic)
even if I lived out in the boonies, it ain't that much cheaper. I'd lose it all on paying for gas to drive in from further away.
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Alright. So earlier today, at lunch, I was browsing the /b/ board at school, bad idea I know, and I came across a rekt thread. Knowing some of my were curious about messed up crap, I decided to show them. Only webm on it was of some south Americans (I think) being burned. I never really liked the more personal ones so to speak, and as you imagine, I was pretty disgusted. So another friend comes by, and to paraphrase the conversation
>friend one "Anon is showing us a video of burning black people"
>friend two "that's sick" to me "you need help"
>me, in my social retardation "it's not cause they were black!"
After a few minutes of standing around and showing cute animal videos to try and show I'm not some insane nazi, it seemed friend two didn't care that much, but I'm still kind of worried since she's more of an acquaintance nowadays. Earlier this evening I sent a friend request, having only got face book recently as a sort of symbolic "we're cool?"
> how fucked am I?
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>>17551949
>this entire post
Jesus kid
Iook buddy I need some food I'II be back in Iike 20 minutes and write my post.
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>>17551949
You're fucked, you ruined your reputation quite a bit with that. Will take work to build it up again, avoid any internet browsing activity in the future.
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Dude wtf...
You should never show people that crap, even if you're disgusted, because the fact that you showed them imediately gives the idea you're into that stuff.
Also
>"it's not cause they were black!"
no, just no. Especially nowadays and especially if it's with people you're just an acquaintance and especially if that acquaintance is a woman..
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Okay so I need some help with how my father is acting.. I'll lay it out briefly:
I told my father that I didn't want his girlfriend at my graduation. (Long story short, she called me a whore for my sexual orientation. Twice, now, actually.) His response was this: "If she can't come, I won't be coming."
So of course, I'm pretty upset, right? I responded in the best way I could, and as civil as possible. A few swear words, I'll admit. Then he had the audacity to say that I am self-sabotaging, and I'm trying desperately to see his side as well, but I can't and I'm usually a very understanding person of both sides of a story. So I went off... pretty bad, I'll admit, but I felt like it was reasonable for how I'm feeling. How else do I respond? I basically just need things to say to him that can be either rude or civil, I don't care which, I'll more than likely send it regardless. I'll have screen shots posted of the conversation, let me know if I need to add more if it looks like there is something missing. Please do not contact him personally, that is all I ask. Thank you! (I plan to post the screen shots in just a second, I need to blurr out his name first.)
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>>17551836
So I guess my image posted anyways without it blurring out the names, so please please PLEASE do not contact him. That's all I ask.
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you should've have sweared senpai, now he thinks you're being a spoiled brat
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>>17551836
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2 years have passed since my breakup but I'm still pretty sad and torn about it. It was a 7 year long relationship. I went no contact since. A year later I even found another gf who adored me but I didn't feel any comfort from it. I didn't feel the same connection, it wasn't fun like her, I kept comparing them and the new one was losing hard. I cutted the relationship because it was just not right for her.
And here I am. A 29 years old with a derailed life because of a breakup. My university career have been on a hold since then, I'm fat, I have a very strict social circle. I'm paralyzed.
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You didn't ask for advice, check off another failure in your life. How hard is it to frame your thread into a question that asks questions and wants answers?
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>>17551732
Sorry, thought you were used to similar cringy-desperate threads.
What do to overcome a breakup that is hurting for way too long?
How can you start dating girls without comparing them to your previous gf?
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>>17551750
You see a therapist to find out why you can't get over her and then he/she will give you specific techniques to calm yourself and move past her.
You have to deal with your issue with your ex first. Hence therapist first and then go for other girls next.
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God fucking damnit. Thats the 4th time in 5 years now. I'm clubbing atm and a friend just told me "man I just had to defend you. Some girls here thought you were homo because of the way you dance"
That really pisses me off. I like dancing in clubs but I dont want to appear like a queer. But other dudes dont really dance, they just step left and right, barely managing to grasp the beat. Seems as if i have to adapt and also do the brainless "step left step right" move everybody else does. I thought my moves were pretty okay. On the other hand theyre right, I mean if you happen to see a dance competition with professionals, the dudes also always look kinda gay. Thats just bullshit.
What are your thoughts about this anon? Pic kinda related
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Stop dancing like a queer and adjust you autist.
You want to get laid right? Stop dancing like a fag and scaring all the girls away. Christ.
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Lol your friends sound awful idk bro id dump my friends and mayb dance differently cha 420 d i c k s q u a d
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That's a funny problem.
We don't know how you're dancing, but I guess you should dance less or making normier. Stop twerking that booty, you will step up your dance game when you will be with people who can dance but you're not getting that in these clubs, most of them just dance randomly and will find any too sophisticated move as stupid or goofy.
Dance at ease and don't overdoit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdYwglFL6iM
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>boyfriend says he'd kill himself if I left him
>we haven't been dating anymore than a week
>idk if I want to be in a relationship rn
>I don't want him to fucking die
what do
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>>17551694
If he can't get over a little break-up, he's not strong enough to live in this world.
He's going to die anyway, it's not your fault.
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He is bluffing and nothing more. People do this all the time when faced with post breakup. Cut off all contact and move on with your life.
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>>17551694
It is manipulation plain and simple.
People who kill themselves generally don't advertise it like that. Even if he did, that is his choice to end his life. Despite what he thinks, it is not your fault. You are not responsible for what happens to him. You owe him nothing.
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I'm going to share with you guys my story of the girl I have fell in love with but seem I have grown to absolutely hate because of how she has treated me this past year.
We met online back in 2009, and even though I was romantically involved with my now ex-wife who was pregnant at the time. Over the years we both were in and out of terrible relationships but kept things cordial and respected each other's relationships that we were in at the time. So we never over stepped any boundaries with each other.
So now comes May of this year and her I have both been single now for a little over a year. Come to find out she moved a town over from mine, I was very happy to say the least, and we both decided to finally meet, she was everything and more that I imagined she would be. I fell for her quickly and HARD. Since we have known each other for seven years I thought it was OK for me to feel this way about her, but apparently I was wrong. She told me that she didn't feel the same way I did, tha she couldn'the be that person for me and that she could not be with someone who has a child. I was absolutely crushed. I told her that I do not give anyone second chances, but I would be willing to give it another try some day when she was ready.
After that I spent the next few months horribly depressed and drunk. To the point of where if I wasn't attached work or on my way to the store to buy alcohol I was pretty much drunk all the time. Meanwhile, she was romantically involved with someone else, and happy. I was jealous, depressed, and drunk.
I finally managed to sober up and come out my depression about late July, and accepted the fact that it was time for me to move on, so I did, and was trying and failing to find another girlfriend. But I accepted this and kept going.
All was business as normal until she messaged me last week, asked me if I wanted to meet up with her that Friday night, and that she moved back to her hometown halfway across the state from me.
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doesn't sound too bad so far, just kind of insensitive for her to call you up when she knew you were miserable, but then again maybe she just hoped you'd move on and you both were important to eachother and she was moving out
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>>17551639
Continued
I agreed to meet her and explained to her that distance was not an issue. I met up with her that Friday, and we just spent hours riding around in my car and conversing, except for this time we didn't share any physical contact, mostly because I was guarded and was being protective of my own feelings. We also agreed to meet up again that following Monday. But other than that everything went well or so I thought.
So we messaged each other back and forth and told each other how excited we were to see each other Monday over the weekend. When Monday came I noticed she was strangely quiet and not responding to my messages, but I figured she may have been busy and didn't want to bother her.
Later that day I drove two hours to meet her, and once I got into the town she lives in I noticed she deleted her Facebook page, it was at this time that I knew something was up, so I drove to her home to see if she was there and she was not. I was very angry with her at this point, and no longer wanted to be in contact with her ever again at this point. Later that night she reactivated her Facebook account and messaged me, she said she got stranded with some other friends, and her phone was dead so she had no way of talking to me, and had the audacity to ask me if I wanted meet up with her the next day. I told her that I don't have the time or gas money to waste to drive and see her, that it feels like she is just fucking with me at this point, and that her profile was deactivated earlier that day so I knew for a fact that she had access to it at some point. Later Tuesday night she messaged me saying that her profile got deactivated because she was using a moniker for her name on Facebook and that is why it got deactivated.
At this point I just absolutely want nothing to do with her and haven't messaged her back. Am I justified for hating her now and feeling the way I do towards her now?
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Ahh yeah? I don't understand what we are supposed to say here....
Anonymous
Can't date a beard, too gross, HELP 2016-09-10 00:59:39 Post No.17551602
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Can't date a beard, too gross, HELP 2016-09-10 00:59:39 Post No.17551602
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Can't date a beard, too gross, HELP
Anonymous
2016-09-10 00:59:39
Post No. 17551602
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I have a friend who I really adore. He is incredibly intelligent and our conversations are so stimulating and provocative that I find his company intoxicating.
But here is the problem, he has a very large unkept beard that I find utterly repulsive. When I see it, my vagina literally retreats, like a started clam, the poor little thing recedes back into my body, tucking its tender folds safely away until it's safe to come out. I have this thing about presentation and hygiene and I just can't bear to look at it. Beards are okay when trimmed and well kept... this is a monster and I want to puke when I lay eyes on it.
the other issue is that he is very close to being Asexual. I'm defiantly not but I really like him so I guess I can get a sex toy.. is that realistic?
TLDR;
>we like each other a lot and the subject of dating has come up
>he has a huge beard that makes me want to vomit
>I don't know if it's my place to say anything, me being judgemental, my problem, not his
>should I say something because I won't date him with that beard?
Mained coon cat because it's somewhat related and I can look at this beard without feeling ill.
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>>17551602
Disgusting beard fags are a byproduct of boys thinking internet superstars need to be their role models and not realizing when enough is too much. Ask him if he'd be willing to clean the shit up if he liked a girl and she asked. Then ask him to do it because you like him.
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>>17551607
Good advice but what worries me is if it doesn't work I would have made him change for me, I don't know if I feel okay with that. If he asked me not to wear eyeliner or fix my brows I would find that hard... I would also find it intrusive.
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>>17551614
Are you in high school or early collge? Get over it. If you like him as much as you say and he asked you to trim your brows without being an ass about it, or told you he thought you were cuter without your eyeliner, you'd do it. If he likes you as much as you think he does, he'll do it. If you and/or he don't, then why are you even worried about it?
Are you in your mid-late 20s? No or you wouldn't be asking this, but also get over it and yourself at that age.
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what gives? I'm throwing myself out there, but only getting fob Asians interested in me.
I'm juggling a few and getting pussy, but why can't I get a white girl?
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because you're short?
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What is your race.
Also height and weight.
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>>17551698
>>17551703
five ten, chubby. good job, house
Hey /adv/. Would you consider dating someone who is in an open relationship if you were more interested in monogamous relationship?
I have a friend who I have I known for a few years now that I'm very attracted to. Would date them in a heartbeat if it wasn't for their current relationship. That being said, their relationship is open and they have expressed interest in me. I guess I'm just trying to decide if I'm comfortable with the open relationship part. Last thing I would want is to lose a friendship. Do you guys have any stories or opinions to share that might help?
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Don't do it
If you're coming to us neckbeards for advice, you probably don't have a spine worthy of handling the jealousy
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>>17551562
Look up unicorn in open relationships
Hint: unicorns don't get treated well
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>>17551575
Is it possible to just accept it and pursue relationship anyway? It's not ideal, but I really like this person.