Okay so I need some help with how my father is acting.. I'll

>>17551836
So I guess my image posted anyways without it blurring out the names, so please please PLEASE do not contact him. That's all I ask.

you should've have sweared senpai, now he thinks you're being a spoiled brat

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>>17551836

>>17551847
shouldn't have**

>>17551853
uh you didn't swear

>>17551854
I was thinking maybe that was the case, but I really hardly ever swear. But this really did create a ruckus of emotion inside. I'm not trying to be spoiled or any of the sort :/ I'm just upset as well, and was hoping he'd respect my wishes.

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>>17551836
>>17551836

>>17551859
where's the swearing tho? anyway you sound like a decent person and he just sounds like a dumb cuck. who doesn't go to this sort of thing just because of a gf? i guess he's trying to defend her, which is "noble" but kinda silly. it's sad but you gotta move on OP

>>17551853
Hey Kirsten I'm sorry to hear that your dad is being a total shit about this - I think your reply was perfect and sadly I don't know if there's much else you can do. Keep your head up and pretend it doesn't bother you too much - hopefully over time he'll see the error in his ways.

He's picking his slam peice over his daughter, fuck him. "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb"

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>>17551836
This one I feel like I went quite overboard

>>17551876
holy shit you went full mad lol

>>17551866
>You're self-sabotaging but not wanting to be around my gf who called you a whore

Wow I'm sorry but your dad is butt-fucking retarded you are a saint for putting up with him and being as civil as you are to be honest

(Kirsten) I'm still uploading the screen shots, I'm on my phone so I can only upload one image at a time, and I have to go through and check to make sure I'm not a robot
Anyways, I appreciate your response. I feel bad for being so upfront, but like I had mentioned to him I didn't want to blindsight him with it, and I really wanted him to be there.
He's an alcoholic which is why I had moved to my mom's, and I still tried for a relationship with him, but honestly I'm fed up, should I make this the last draw?

>>17551876
>You're just attacking me
what did he say to make you say this? he was just typical dumb parent midlifecrisis man. seriously this sounds a bit exaggerated like you're playing the rape card or whatever. i mean he doesn't want to come his loss, it's sad and shit, but move on. don't accuse him of "attacking" you, he just thinks you should make an effort to be friends with the gf, who cares fuck him

>>17551885
I say a grand finale, but I've already given you plenty of responses to use.

>>17551885
I wouldn't try to do the mental gymnastic to try to justify maintaining a close relationship with him. It seems like he has made himself clear and picked a side and it isn't yours. There's nothing else you can do unless you want to suck up to his cunt girlfriend just to get back in his good graces which you definitely should not do

>>17551880

This. Yeah the one about his education was maybe a bit overboard and sanctimonious but everything else you seem in the right. If he is not defending you when his girlfriend insults you, and won't see you on a momentous occasion because she could ruin your day, then he is not acting like a father. He is treating you like an acquaintance rather than a daughter

just cut him off OP.

He isn't going to read all that emotional shit.

You literally should have just said
"if you're going to choose your girlfriend over you own daughter then I don't need you in my life. I'm asking for one day that I can enjoy with my dad, and you're not willing to give that to me. Do not contact me again."

That's all
Then actually ignore him.

You're not asking a lot from him at all, and from what I've seen he doesn't give a single shit about you. Cut him off.

>>17551886
(Kirsten) he had asked about my graduation, and I wanted to bring it up that I didn't want his girlfriend there. I'm not trying to play the rape card or exaggerate by any means. He's been like this since my mom left him, and his girlfriend constantly lies to him saying I've done things that I haven't done. I'll be damned to let her see me ever again. I'm not following your point, so could you elaborate more? Please forgive me and understand that.

>>17551895
...okay i didn't understand the full picture, i see it now. plus reading from other anon's responses, i get it. never mind what i said. you're a decent person. he's not. don't let this fuck you up. you're doing the right thing here. fuck him.

>>17551893
(Kirsten) I honestly have to say I agree, I went overboard about his education and I do feel bad. I said it out of anger, but I don't think taking it back will do anything. I've told my mom what happened and she approved of what I was saying to him as a response. Thank you!

>>17551876
That was too far :( I feel bad for your dad. He was raised in an environment and time where being gay was bad and scary, so he's more understanding of his girlfriend. Different times. He still tried to be supportive of you himself, but obviously the spouse comes before adult kids.

It's hard for older people to find love, and now his adult daughter is trying to force him to pick between him and his wife. And throwing low punches about how he didn't graduate. :( Poor guy.

>>17551876
> you're just attacking me
> sends him an ad hominem

FUCKBOI
You went good with >>17551853 and he's the one to blame in >>17551866
but this one is your mistake and will not help you. If he didn't see it yet, delete the last message. >>17551876

If he saw it, let 1-2h pass before sending him an apology about that one.

But besides that, your point was made : He can't a gf ruin the relation daughter-dad. If he happens to do it, it's on him. But don't threaten, he's obviously already biased and he's implying your doing it for your own-self. Tell him you love him and you need him to be with you when the times come. Tell him how futile it would be to fuss and fight because of that matter.

Fuck his gf tho'
Stupid bitch making a family part for no reason, what sort of adult calls a teenager whore btw
She's probably the problem, and you probably can't do nothing about it. I'm sorry for you OP.

>>17551894
I am cutting him off. I've gathered that he never reads the emotional part of it. He read my last message but never responded. It's hard to ignore him because I hate to say it, but I still sort of care about him. I think I just want him to care about me to make it better, but I never get anywhere with it so I may have to just cut him of like you've said.

>>17551910
No, not poor guy. I have to disagree with you on this, he's made me his practical mother figure when I lived with him. I couldn't go to sleep until I knew he was safe and in bed, passed out drunk. But I see where you're at, the full story isn't given, but like I said, I must disagree with you on this statement.
Props to him for doing service for us, though. I'll give him that much.
He didn't raise me, my mom did, I only lived with him for two years and it turned out bad.

>>17551912
* he can't let a gf


I do feel he's not changing his mind, and if that happens well you either lose by letting his gf come to your graduation, or you don't let them both come and you shut her off AFTER the graduation. It's not that big of a deal anyway, I had a messed up family and we never enjoy any birthday, graduation, etc. If you don't take the matter too seriously, you will see that it's all futile.

Congrats on the graduation though, I don't know what that means but hey, that's something good I guess. Much love

>>17551915
He's not going to start caring about you, and he didn't respond because he doesn't respect you. He doesn't think you're actually cutting him off, so you need to commit to it.


Listen- there are plenty of people in this world who will care very deeply for you. There are people who you are not related to who can be better "father figures" to you. Pursue relationships with those people. look for that emotional fulfillment elsewhere. Don't keep pecking at the same patch of dead grass. You're not going to find any commitment from the man who is your father. It sucks to say but he's just a deadbeat dude

>>17551915
My dad did the same to me, except he was still young enough to have more kids with the other woman. From then on, it was like I had never existed. Cut him off, knowing that this was his decision, and focus on the people in your life that matter. Never, ever blame yourself for this.

>>17551912
I feel the same way about the last thing I sent him. I can't take it back because he's already read it, but *maybe* an apology, I'm not sure. I'm upset at the moment, so it's hard to decide on what to do about this situation as a whole

>>17551935
Do it later, this will be cleared out of your mind and it will give him a reason to re-think the situation. It's actually the good side of an apology, you will make him see that you do care about him and that you only want his happiness.

>>17551928
I'm afraid you're right. Very well said, I have to commit to it. It's difficult getting myself to do so because I want to care about him, you know? I'm sure I'll get through it, eventually. Thank you!

>>17551942
Are you sure? I'm not sure what I've said can be forgiven by him?

>>17551931
I'm sorry to hear, but I'm glad to know that I'm not alone, and that you're not either! It's heartbreaking growing up with broken families :(

>>17551942
I don't think apologizing will matter. He's already of the mind that she's young, stupid and trying to self-sabotage. He doesn't respect her thoughts or feelings and he certainly doesn't want to deal with anything that will rock the boat with his girlfriend. She'll regret apologizing to a man that refuses to make her the priority.

>>17551857
I swore a little bit if you read further into the screenshots

>>17551948
He will add it as a reason to not come so you should do it. He will probably hold it against you and he feels right about it since you're the hateful one in his opinion.

I do think you should apologize, but I'm also okay with this >>17551928 so it's not that necessary.
If still believe that he can trust you back and come, well go for it. Just break through the messages and just say you're sorry for what you've said earlier and that it was stupid of you to say it. Breaking through the subject to apologize will make him see that you're more about him that the sole purpose of him coming. And it will freeze a little the heat between you two.

But it's fine if you don't do it now, I just think doing it earlier is better.

>>17551959
If she doesn't, he will see himself as right. But yes I agree with you, I see that we should not expect much of him he's a focused stupid dude who only believes his own opinion. That's also why she needs to be right on every front so that he can't justify the fact of leaving her for that stupid gf.
Shouldn't have mentioned it in the first place but it's too late now.

>>17551922
So he made some mistakes, that doesn't give you the right to verbally berate him.

>>17551978
Some mistakes? Yes we've all made them. But how many mistakes does it take for someone to finally have enough of it?

>>17551975
You make a really good point on whether I should apologize or not. I don't really want to apologize for it, but I also do want him to come to my graduation at the same time. I've definitely tried to have a decent relationship with him, but I can only see him contacting me while he's drunk, too, because that's usually how it goes it seems to be. But regardless, the comment about him not graduating wasn't necessary, I'm just not sure if he's worth an apology from me?

>>17552001
The apology does nothing. He's going to think negative things about you regardless, and you can't really take back what's been said. It's not your loss though, he's the one that's really losing out by doing this to his own daughter.

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>>17552001
>>17552053

I'm not going to fight over doing it or not. I just wish you the best OP and I put my trust in the other anon which seems like a reasonable person. You have a great day/evening/night depending on your place in the world.

> pic not related why the fuck is my captcha in Arab, is google trying to sell me to ISIS