Is it common to be so depressed/unsure what you want to do with your life that you accidentally become a normie?
I've been disgruntled/in malaise for years until very recently, when I had a moment of despair that looped around into elation, and gave in to a desire to fit in and be as normal as possible. Achieve gf, conventional job, house, houseplants, etc purely for the sake of it. Anyone else feel this way?
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>>17404506
Sounds like manic depression.
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You either die a loser, or live long enough to see yourself become a normie.
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>>17404506
I don't think so.
Context, opee? Are you on medication? Did anything special happen recently?
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>>17404504
Ask if she's fat. Specifically, ask the male friends if she's fat. Women are fucking retarded when it comes to fatness, I've had female friends try to set me up with they're "very pretty" friend who was over 200 pounds. But a male friend should be able to tell you if she's fat.
If she's not fat, then sure go for it. It's not really any different than meeting somebody off Tinder.
>not make it terribly awkward
Again just treat it like meeting a girl from the internet.
>guarded or just be myself
Be the best version of you. Some women are extremely judgmental on first dates and will reject any guy that isn't incredibly engaging and funny. Other women are more reasonable. But either way, don't be "guarded" but you need to project as much confidence as you can, even if it's false confidence, and just be as interesting as you can.
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I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this /adv/, but can someone tell me what this is? I'm not sure if its cause my manager had to turn off the water supply yesterday throughout the whole building, but its slowly been appearing ever since and this is the worst one I've seen
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>>17404502
I guess the water is back on now?
Keep it running. Like, keep it running for 10 minutes. If the water doesn't get better you call your manager (landlord?) and tear his face off.
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>>17404502
Probably sediment from your water heater/boiler
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>>17404547
My bad I worded it wrong I guess, its been on since yesterday and ever since it was turned back on, it slowly started to appear but would be washed away with the water, but would reappear again. I'm worried thats its something in the water
>>17404548
How long would that take to go away then?
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How can I learn to not be afraid of the past?
There was a period of my life where I went a bit "mad" for lack of more concise terms. In the wrong mood, if a thought or reminder of my mindset and manner of being from that era passes my mind, I have an immediate anxiety response. The fear stems from the idea that I could be sucked back in, or subconsciously begin along some slow gradient where I "go back" and ultimately become functionally crippled. That was of being is enticing and was dualistic, but came at far too great a cost.
It's clear I haven't reconciled this, and I still haven't found the means. But the panic response must go. I have to figure how to use these tools without fearing mental regression. It's a small part of unraveling and stripping anxiety as a whole. Had enough.
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Maybe I should just accept it. Don't know how to do this correctly.
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Just let it go. Move on. It sounds to me as if you're ashamed of that "mad bit," and you're not aware of how others feel.
If it concerns you, talk about it with them and apologize for how it may have affected them. Learning how your "mad bits" affect others goes a long way in being self-aware just enough to know you're better than that.
Shame is a heavy motherfucker. Talk it out, be more empathetic, and move along.
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Learn to accept the past.
It's done. Welcome to the present.
You were younger, less experienced. You are older and wiser now, so learn to trust yourself.
I assume you know what triggers your responses, and as cliche as it sounds, you need to face them. When you do that, and come out okay, you'll start to learn that there is nothing there to fear, much as we learn the closet and the space under the bed don't house monsters.
Remember that this anon believes you can make it. You need to believe it too.
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Hey all,
Tomorrow is the first time me and my girlfriend are gonna fuck in our lives. Are they any tips to stop nutting quick?
I know you're gonna say that it's normal for the first time, and she too has said she doesn't expect much, but won't be disappointed - but I really want to make her pleasantly surprised.
I've just turned 18 and I nut so quick. It's really embarrassing, so I need some tips that ensure I'm not gonna nut in 0.72 jiffies.
Any help would be greatly appreciated.
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You're most likely not going to nut out of stress or anxiety.
Don't worry about it and just have fun. Listen to what she's saying though. Make sure she's comfortable.
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Have fun OP. Make sure to cum inside!
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Lmao
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Do you ever get over being rejected/dumped and then that person comes back wanting a second chance? Is it possible to have a second go without the resentment?
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Yes but it gets old after the 8th time. You need a lot of patience and a big heart.
Don't do it honestly, it's will initiate a pattern of emotional abuse stemming from the partner coming back. They now feel that they can act as they please and you will support (enable) their behaviors.
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>>17404423
I did, and lately I've just been feeling like a safety net instead of the new relationship
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I think it is possible, but you have to put in the effort and really communicate exactly how you feel and what you want
Sometimes people are good for each other, sometimes they aren't good at certain points in their lives, to get back though you have to be on the same page, you have to change from how you were, fix whatever your mistakes were
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/adv/, a question you've had probably thousands of times.
I think he likes someone else. How do I get over it? We're in the same circle of friends.
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only time mends a broken heart
the only thing to do is to find something to have your mind thinking about someone/something else
close friends are essential
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How long will it take? It somehow feels different compared to the other times...
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>>17406274
It felt different every time.
Every time it was the same.
Just accept it and move on.
"Someone will always be better than you, so just focus on yourself and do your best"
Or
"Your best? Losers whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen"
Which one is the right philosophy?
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>>17404369
>right philosophy
Each person should do what works for them and their specific problems
But it depends on what you are doing, if its a highly competitive major/job maybe you want to be better than everyone else, if not just do your best to reach your objectives
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>>17404500
>everyone should do what works for them
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>>17404554
I mean yes, its cliche but its true, what are you going to do? pretend your mad when you lose
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Help me out.
My girl is emotionally abusive. For good reason, she has a large history of being sexually and emotionally abused. Issue is I deserve better; after spending 8 months with her, seeing her 5-6 days a week and giving her all the support, patience, time and love possible she tosses me away like nothing.
How damaging would it be to her to reappear, surprise her, spend a few days making her feel validated and loved and then abandon her? Coming from the one man she claims and knows to have cared and been good to her, will this hurt?
I need to be vindicated. She needs to feel the hurt she inflicts. Thoughts?
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The best revenge is not giving a fuck about her and moving on.
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>>17404363
She would hit you with a rape charge as soon as you are out the door.
Don't be an idiot, don't dangle the hornets' nest, don't fuck with a crazy chick, learn your lesson, move on
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>>17404399
She's too callous to care; this is the exact behavior she's inflicting on me.
>>17404404
Possibly. She didn't press charges when she was actually raped. Although our sex could easily be misconstrued as rape with how intense she likes me to take her. I'll take video of consent and the sex as contingency.
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Hey /adv/, question for anyone with some medical knowledge/experience here, it could be serious. My brother is going through some sort of manic phase or something, I don't know what it is but he might be temporarily insane. He is has been researching online phenomenon like the Mandela effect and believes he is from a different timeline. He keeps asking me questions about how things are/were.
He came home the other day really energetic, more so then usual, and said he feels fine and has no pain in his body (he takes Vicodin and has arthritis in his hands, can't even bend them, he slipped a disc in the army in his spine and has constant back pain). He threw away all his pills, all his pain meds, and even stopped smoking right there on the spot.
He has been in a good mood and has a very low appetite, and even though he might be going crazy he has been open and honest about it. He calls it "the switch", says something happened in his brain and he feels different. He has no history of mental illness, and he is a really normal guy. What the hell is going on?
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Sounds like he had a memory lapse after taking drugs.
>the switch
He's trying to go sober
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>>17404353
Talk to him carefully and ask if he has taken drugs
Observe if he goes to sleep.
If he says no to the first and the second is a yes, call the psych bus and get him admitted.
Mania is serious fucking business, he could sell your house, give away your television, throw out your MLP figurine collection, any kind of wierd shit that makes sense in his senseless mind.
All your symptoms point to mania, but it could be drugs, most likely psychoactive and not stimulants,
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>>17404416
He only smokes marijuana and drinks, and he said he has had trouble sleeping. He hasn't done anything to crazy yet though, mostly the pills/smoking. He goes to work everyday and said people noticed changes but simply thought he was in a better mood. So far he is just hanging out in his room, watching TV and drinking.
>>17404359
Would a memory lapse cause something that serious though? I'm thinking it could be dementia, he has had it before but it went away years ago. He also had a brain injury in the Army, never said what it was or what happened.
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/adv/, today my friend was all broken up and mopey about his cat dying. I couldn't give a shit, my mom died two weeks ago. I mean I faked it and pretended to comfort him, but I was honestly kind of mad he would even bring it up with me. Am I an asshole for feeling this way?
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>>17404344
Are you mad that he did not comfort you when you needed comforting?
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>>17404344
He was looking for a little empathy. And while, yes, a relative (especially a parent) dying hurts like fuck, that doesn't instantly trump all other emotional pain. You can't just shrug it off - and you should know, given that you have been going through a similar experience yourself.
So yes, you were a bit of an asshole. But you are still mourning, and if your friend holds it against you he is just as big of an asshole.
Just try not to lash out. People in pain shouldn't try to hurt other people in pain.
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>>17404409
No, we didn't talk about it at all but I kind of kept it to myself by choice, I didn't really want to open up about it, it's just my personality.
I need help and advice on some things of the sexual nature.
Firstly, I have never been a very physical person so everything in a relationship past hugging can be a bit weird for me. One issue we have is that kissing, specifically making out, turns me off. All the way off, but for my bf, it's a huge turn on to make out. He said that if he knew about my disdain for kissing it may have been a deal breaker, but now that he loves me we are trying to work on compromising but I know it really bumms him out that we can't really have makeout sessions. Advice on what to do in this situation?
Second, he has insomnia and is frequently kept from sleeping completely because of being horny after I fall asleep. Sometimes we try to fool around before bed so he can hopefully sleep after doing stuff but it doesn't always happen due to a long distance relationship so we only see each other on weekends. Any one have experience with such things? Any advice is appreciated.
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>>17404325
First off, i'm assuming you have some sort of past trauma that makes you not enjoy physicality, for that dr anon perscribes a therapist.
It it's something that you know you'll never get over, it is a deal breaker for most people. Make sure you make that perfectly clear next time you go into a relationship with someone
lastly, if you're like 17 its quite possible you're still in the kissing is icky phase of your life
Anonymous
Is sex a part of a healthy life? 2016-07-29 00:25:01 Post No.17404311
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Is sex a part of a healthy life? 2016-07-29 00:25:01 Post No.17404311
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Is sex a part of a healthy life?
Anonymous
2016-07-29 00:25:01
Post No. 17404311
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People keep telling me "Sex is nothing, sex is nothing and doesn't really do much."
Yet.. the people who have had sex or getting regular sex are the ones to say this. I haven't met anyone who hasn't had sex that says "Sex is nothing and not that exciting." EVER.
So what is the answer? I am a sexless male and I feel way less healthy than any other male my age who has women that like them or can interact with women in such a way that it is positive.
Drives me crazy because I am just trying to live and I feel like certain needs aren't being met but people tell me that these needs aren't needs at all.
What can I do?
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Just keep doing your thing. Being without sex sucks but it won't kill you or make you sick.
On the flipside, at least STDs won't be an issue. That's what I tell myself.
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>>17404311
>I haven't met anyone who hasn't had sex that says "Sex is nothing and not that exciting." EVER.
Hello. Or rather, I can't say that it's nothing and not exciting as I don't have first hand experience, but I really don't care to find out either. Just doesn't seem worth the hassle.
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>>17404311
That's why one of the first responses is going to be "see a prostitute"
Find out yourself
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I have to read the Poisonwood Bible for class (which I did) But I have to ask questions about the historical events in the novel and write A page on each one (4 questions, 4 pages) The thing is, I can't figure out what to talk about, could someone help me with finding questions for this?
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Go to the homework board for help, anon.
>>>>/hm/
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Are you in college?
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>>17404228
kek <3
I find it very difficult to keep up with popular music - I genuinely wonder where the hell everyone hears these famous songs by Chris Brown or whoever and it makes me feel very awkward if there's a sing-a-long going on with some friends or something. Instead I find myself listening to Brian Wilson's discography or a fairly narrow pool of artists. As women value competence in a man, will my apparent inability to keep up with popular music indicate that I lead my life in a dysfunctional way, and therefore turn them off?
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No, but your insecurity will do a fine job at driving them away. No one cares if you know the lyrics of Beaten Chocolate by Chris Brown or not.
And to ask your first question most people know the latest popular songs from clubs, gyms, bars and radio.
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>>17404216
>As women value competence in a man, will my apparent inability to keep up with popular music indicate that I lead my life in a dysfunctional way, and therefore turn them off?
No, but your way of thinking will turn them off. The fact that you would be worried about what a woman might think, and be willing to change the style of music you listen to for this reason is quite pathetic, and women don't like pathetic. I don't have a fucking clue about "popular music", as 99% of it is shit. Never afffected relationships with friends or girlfriends.
Stop trying to mold yourself into who you think people would like. Just be you, and be confident about it.
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Pop music sucks and so do the basic bitches that like it. Look for a girl with better taste than one who just likes things because they're contemporary