Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1638. page

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I am being smeared at the workplace by one person that portrays me as a stoner in a line of work where this is unacceptable. I look worn out often enough and may have been a stoner up to a many years ago, before entering this job. There is no hard evidence and there are no open accusations, but coworkers turning from me abruptly upon hearing the rumor hurt a lot. How should I respond to this?

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Does anyone else view sex as a negative action?

I'm 25, but I only see sex in a negative light. it's so confusing to me because everyone and everything in society pushes how it's the best thing ever. I can't see it. I've tried sex 3 different times in the past, and all it did was make me feel bad about myself. When I see sex scenes on TV, it makes me reflect on my past experiences with guilt. It makes me feel depressed sometimes. To make it worse, my friends casually say "man, just go fuck some girl and you'll feel better"... that's exactly what I did before, and all it did was make me feel worse about myself...

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There's a busker who I talk to sometimes and I like him.

I want to ask him out but I think it would be really awkward because

a) I'm a fat girl
b) We've only had a few short conversations every time I've passed him by
c) I wouldn't even know how to ask him out
d) It will be forever awkward whenever I pass him by if he says no

Advice?

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I am 24, female. I recently got in my 2nd relationship.

My first relationship was extremely trusting and we both were very non-jealous people. We were very in love and trusted each other completely, I never doubted his faithfulness.
I have a couple of very close male friends and out friendship never bothered my ex, even when I hanged out with them alone, spent the night at their place or when I travelled with them. He didn't mind it when I made new male friends, didn't mind if I went out alone with my friends at night, never said a word about the way I dressed or about my lifestyle. We had complete access to each other's social media and phone, even if we never snooped.


My boyfriend, on the other hand, is not like that. He was cheated on before and has some trust issues, which I try to be understanding of. I understand that everyone's boundaries are different, and I don't expect him to be as trusting as my ex, but I feel like he wants to have an unhealthy level of control on me.

I can accept to not stay over at a male's friend house at night, or to not travel alone with them but I think it's unreasonable to ask me not to hang out with them one-on-one.
I think it's unreasonable to ask me to not be friendly towards males (I obviously cut contact the second they become flirty in the slightest).
I think it's unreasonable to ask me to not go out with my friends to bars, even if I do it rarely, or when he acts like he expects me to ask for permission.
I feel uncomfortable letting him have my passwords or touch my phone because I feel like he'd actually snoop.

Is my reasoning wrong? Would you mind if your girlfriend acted like I do?

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What does one do when they crave a romantic relationship?

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I've paid this girl for used socks and used boots. She's stunningly hot.

Thing is, I have crazy sexual deviances such as a poop and urine fetish. Not my own but from another girl.

> inb4 speak to a therapist/psychiatrist

I've already done that and they say provided it isn't affecting my life, it's okay.

She agreed to hand me a bag of her feces. The problem is, how do I know I'm not consuming dog and urine shit? Human poop is safe so long as the person isn't infected but dog shit can give you tapeworms, kidney problems and blindness.

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I just caught my gf of 2+ years cheating on me

Just as she was checking in on a motel

I said 'h...hi!' and she freaked out, quickly got in the elevator and I just turned back and left

I've known her for more than 6 years. She's close to my family and I'm close to hers. We've been through rough patches but nothing we couldn't recover from

I've given her all of me. I've always been 100% faithful as I considered her to be the love of my life

She knows me like the palm of her hands. I was planning on proposing this year but she threw it all away

How do you deal with a broken heart, /adv/?

I know this is for the best and it would've been much worse if I found out after marriage or even parenthood, but it still hurts like a kick in nuts. I don't understand how she could willingly break me apart and turn my life upside down for a quick fuck. Why not just say she's tired? Why act with so much malice?

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>meet girl
>start dating
>take her virginity
>good relationship, fun times, v chill
>hardly fight, no drama, etc

>dating for six months now
>invites me to her mums birthday
>pretty chill, her mum likes me, etc
>all seems normal
>night ends, go home
>two days later she's ignoring me completely
>we didn't fight or anything
>just stops responding to texts, cancels all our plans
>pull her up on it
>"sorry I've been weird anon my mind is all over the place now"
>ask her what is up, whether we're okay
>"I'm sorry I know I haven't said much"
>asks if I'm "free to talk" on day she ALREADY cancelled plans on bc she was "too busy" next week
>fine whatever
>haven't heard from her since (2 days now)

Am I wrong in thinking this is completely unreasonable behaviour? I've basically accepted that I'm about to be dumped, but if she can't make an effort to treat me with respect instead of just completely ghosting me I'm not going to bother to try and save the relationship. Should I have handled this differently.

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Want to ask a guy i am already sleeping with to play a game where we name something and see if the other is into it.
Hesitation caused by
>far more expirienced than him
>definitely more kinky than hes had the oppurtunity to be
>into some really kinky shit... Being called names, slapped across the face, being spit on.
>this could freak him out.
Still worth just slowly seeing where the line is? I guess how do i go about/need confidence/assurance. Pic is me.

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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.

>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships, fart guy and the guy who stuffs his pants
Fuck off

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Does anyone know some good anime to watch?

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so my sister (18) and I (21) are usually home alone because our parents work a lot and we spend a lot of time together, but we're not too close. I like her a lot though, maybe even too much, because I think about her sexually a lot, like her small body and everything. I have accidentally walked in on her changing/bathing a few times, and now recently I was going out from shower and dropped my towel near her with a half chub, couldn't miss that she noticed it and bit her lip a little, then I hear her masturbating in the shower (my room's walls are near the bathroom). I really want to get closer to her and do some stuff, should I go for it?

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Any comic, show, or movie anyone could recommend that includes any cool openly gay/bi crossdressing male, or male dressing in very feminine ways?

I don't mean a transgender woman, I mean a crossdressing biological man identifying as a man.

It doesn't need to be the protagonist, it doesn't need to have any importance to the plot that they are crossdressers. Just seeing ANY important male character casually be crossdressing and also be openly gay or bi would be nice for personal reasons.

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I hired a maid to clean my apartment while I was at work. She's a nice Hispanic girl, always leaves everything nice and tidy, pleasant to talk to. She comes over 3 times a week. However I noticed that some of my food has been going missing and it's always after she has been in my house. Now I'm not dumb enough to leave expensive shit out in the open and I don't have that much stuff to begin with so when stuff goes missing it's immediately apparent but it's always just food. I didn't want to jump to conclusions so I had a friend setup a couple cameras in my place. It didn't take long before I caught Maria in the act.

So she's literally just stealing food from me. Stuff like slices of bread, cookies, condiments, vegetables, leftovers, etc. but she doesn't overindulge so it's not that noticeable unless you're an anal asshole like me.

I was kind of at a lost. On one hand, it's just food. I'm not poor but at the same time, it's the principle of the matter. If she just asked I would have been more than happy to share so I'm very upset at Maria.

I confront her about this like "Maria, porque cuando tu viene a mi apartamento mi comida siempre esta desapareciendo?" She denied it at first but then I showed her the video and it was undeniable. I scolded her actions and she started crying. She explained to me she's poor and could barely afford to eat and she has trouble getting jobs, etc. I told her if she just asked I would have shared with her and she was surprised and didn't even consider that I would but I said I don't tolerate stealing and I let her go.

She was very very sad and crying and I felt genuinely bad. It was quite a scene. Maria left me a couple messages since then apologizing for what she did and wants me to rehire her.

Should I give her a second chance? I do like her work a lot, stealing aside. Still if it's food now, it might be something bigger in the future. I feel like there will always be trust issues going forward. What do you guys think?

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I've been dating this girl for 3 months now and I've reached a point where I seriously consider breaking up with her. Something just didn't sit with me right for a while and I've began to wonder if she's been emotionally abusing me all this time. Before I start, I should mention that she has got out of an abusive relationship where she was beaten and emotionally punished and that's something I've always had in mind when excusing her behaviour.

I don't know if she realizes it or not, but she often does things that I find hurtful. Sometimes when we joke around, she will make me the butt of the joke and she will keep going at it to the point I find it hurtful. I will often smile and pretend like it doesn't hurt me, but deep inside it'scausing me grief. At the end of one night, she noticed I became sad and asked what happened. I told her that I felt hurt by some of the things she did that night. She shocked me, because rather than offer me compassion and apologize she turned defensive. It dawned on me then that her reaction is always the same, whenever I point out to her that she did something that hurt me, she will either start stonewalling me or turn aggressive. We will often end up in an argument, where we both end up saying hurtful things and by that point I'm the one crying and apologizing, with her not really offering any aplogy for what we were arguing in the first place.

In fact, I've realized that lately I've been crying a lot. Whenever I'm around her I feel like I'm walking on eggshells. Every little thing I say, can make her upset and when that happens she will just withdraw and start stonewalling me. By the time I get her to tell me what happened that hurt her, I'm so worn out and feel so guilty that I end up breaking down and apologizing for everything.