Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1937. page

help

Kill yourself autist

>18209506

why? That's not helpful.

So, your girl goes to another woman? She's a bi?

I've been through similar experiences, and sadly only time will heal, but if you want to speed up the process you can always go disdain her. Show contempt, disdain thins you could never have. Forcefully alter your mindset to hate it.

Mind you, that's not a healthy way. The best way is to constantly remind yourself that your happiness is depended on yourself not others' presence, learn to love yourself. Do something you love, master some individual skill/expertise.

>>18209099
never be friends with an ex.

>>18209099
>your ideal woman is someone who leaves you for an abusive partner
This indicates to me that you're blind to any of her faults. What could I say to make you feel better?

I try keeping myself busy. Doing stuff that make the time pass by without me noticing and then wow look it's dinner time (the time you should actually eat).

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Just go to the gym you faggot. You will not think about food.

Look for comfort in other areas, don't chastise yourself over your looks and try not to obsess over them. Just work on changing your life habits gradually, and make peace with the fact that it'll probably take half a year to reach a point where you can look yourself in the mirror and be satisfied. So avoid mirrors as a general rule, and don't weight yourself three times a day.

Just focus work, hobbies and self improving. Overall, be mindfull that you have a limited amount of self control and mental fortitude available in a day, and this diet is tapping into it, so avoid doing too many things that take discipline, you might burn yourself out and start binging like you already did.

Just keep a positive outlook and consider what's happening to you not a punishment, but your new healthy habits for the rest of your life.

>>18208975
Are you sure you feel numb to positive emotion or you just don't get to experience it or deflect it? No matter how troubled you are or how fucked up your are you can become a more positive person. Hate, obsession, jealousy... All of those are destructive and will make you a "troubled person".

>>18208980
How can I become more positive?

and thankyou for the reply

>>18208971
You should get therapy. I don't mean that to be insulting, I'm serious.

>>18208971

Make peace with her. She didn't do what she did out of spite and didn't realize she was fucking you up. Holding it against her will just make life more miserable for both of you. Everyone's parents unintentionally fuck them up somehow.

>>18208971
It depends, what do you mean exactly by "make fun of"

>>18208966
Is there a limit on matching on Tinder?

Doesn't matter, let it go.

>>18208966
It's possible she invited someone else that she deemed better than you. Forget it and let it go. All the best things to you, anon. You'll be someone's best option at some point Im sure.

>>18208911
Break up, stay strong, and don't cheat. If you have the strength of character, you will just break up and get on with your life. Cheating to get back at anyone is not the right thing to do and you know it

>>18208911
Break it up silently and strongly. Don't explain yourself, don't lecture, just leave and block him from every communication possibility. He ain't worth an additional second of your time.

it's just a prank bro

>>18208852
yep, random people on the street. torrent "project go" by "simple pickup"

That feel when the greasy creep sits next to you rather than a woman on a crowded bus

I go in clubs and just smile all the time until some girl smiles back and then I start a conversation

>would like to get nudes sometimes
>don't know how
Fuck me senpai.
As for you OP, such things quickly become popular in the masses because the masses don't have much virtue. If you don't wanna see or send nudes just say so, if someone gets offended or stop talking to you because of that even better.

>>18208843
>Since when is this a thing?
Since it was possible. Just like people started to film themselves fucking since the availability of cheap home cameras. Or looking at cat pictures at work when Internet became more mainstream.

>Do people nowadays want everything revealed and given to them from the start?
What does this even mean in the context of the topic? You seem to look at it from the porn POV while it's more a turn on thing, for both.

> If I want someone in particular nude I'll see them nude in person.
This isn't always possible.

>I've known people getting mad and feeling rejected for not wanting to send them nudes. Or asking for theirs.
Someone is always going to be butthurt. This is related to the people you deal with, not to nudes.

>Is it normal that the fact that this is considered perfectly normal/
Is it normal that something is considered normal? Well, duh?

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No one's seriously going to acknowledge the even bigger elephant in the room?
OP, you are right for even more reasons than you are aware.
If one wants a professional career later down in life, nudes existing in the hands of exes and on the internet CAN AND WILL be used as blackmail.
Even if one trusts every SO and FB (which is foolish), you cannot trust the security of cloud storage that most people blindly back up photos to.
tl;dr Don't send nudes if you care about goals and careers.

>>18208796
Welcome to the adult world. What exactly is your problem?
Job, gf, anxiety, friends, happines, accomodation?

Just learn how to step out from your comfort zone and you will be fine. Try talking to somebody. Your parents should be able to help.

>>18208844
Nogf, stable job. I have a small circle of friends but haven't made a new friend in over 12 years.

I can't make friends at work either. I try to talk to people and things, but after the initial period the relationship kind of dies because I never move relationships further. All the people I know usually made the effort themselves to get to know me, and I'm very uninteresting so it's difficult for me to attract people.

I have friends but I feel lonely. I've repressed my feeling my entire life, always played the asocial cold type guy but it was just a persona to hide myself behind.

>>18208934
You gotta man up OP. I'm literally in the same boat as you (no gf, stable job, can't make friends/relationship fades quickly), and I am perfectly fine with this. I get to spend a lot of time on my hobbies, and don't have to deal with the bullshit that comes with having friends (drama, doing things that are boring just for the "friendship", etc.)

You might be at the border between attractive and creepy. Easy for you to swing both ways for reasons I know. Take your chances whenever it seems you're on the attractive side.

>>18208742
But why am I creepy? Why are normal people not creepy, what's wrong with me? I fucking hate this look on the girls' faces when they seem to speed up as they pass me lol. Then I tend to get paranoid and it worsens it. And yet on a different day every second girl would look visibly attracted to me, head turning and what not.

People on /soc/ said I'm good looking.

>>18208762
You might stare at some of them without smiling?

>>18208664
(con't)

Fast forward to election day. I've made no apologies about being very pro-gun, so I refused to vote for Clinton, but at the same time, I could not justify voting for Trump knowing Pence's history. I voted 3rd party and encouraged others to do the same because I felt it split the difference between our self-interests (and our votes didn't really matter much anyway lol Texas).

Then Trump won and immediately everyone started cutting me out of the social circle I was in. I started being told that I valued my "pew pew penis extenders" more than their "right to LIFE". I laid out a detailed explanation about my values and the logic behind my actions, but they flatly rejected my explanation and called me a "selfish white knighting piece of garbage." I suddenly found myself with no contact with any of the people I had considered a second family for years, and a couple of secondary friends who I'm all but certain are spying on me to feed back "did you hear what he said now" gossip to the main group (I keep them as "friends" because information flows both ways and I can tell when they're vagueposting about me). And of course, they're re-rallying around the same abusive asshole who was the first to treat me like shit.

>>18208667
(con't, final)

I got mad. I felt incredibly betrayed, especially when my explanation of my values and priorities was basically given a "fuck you, liar" to my face. I'm still mad. I wake up on occasion with my fists clenched. One time I woke up yelling "YOU FUCKING TRAITOR" for no apparent reason. If I'm in my car for extended periods of time my train of thought goes back to this disaster and I find myself teeth-grittingly furious. I feel like everything about the person I worked to become - the "better me" - not only wasn't good enough, but that the people I truly cared about didn't consider that persona legitimate.

Worse yet, I can't find anyone to talk to about it because the only people left in my life are the far right types who I wanted to distance myself from in the first place, and because being a gun hobbyist basically means I can never admit to being mad - even when justified - or people just treat you as even more of a pariah. I've tried asking some of the people in the group "hey, what do I need to work on" and just get ignored. I'm now constantly on edge and hostile to strangers and I know I shouldn't be. My mom tells me I need to learn to just "turn it off" and relax but I have no idea how to anymore. I feel like I've been robbed of the only real group of friends I've ever had and I don't know how to move forward. I'm not social; I work from home and these people were the sole method of meeting new people that I've had for the last 6 years, so on top of that I feel like I've been effectively socially isolated from not just finding new friends but any potential romantic partners too. I'm 27, I don't have time to rebuild my whole fucking social life from scratch anymore.

What the fuck is my problem? How the fuck am I supposed to deal? Why am I still pissed off when there's nothing I can do anymore and I fucking know it?

Sounds to me like your situation can be solved by burning every bridge you have left with those people (why do you even need information on them if it only hurts you ?) and try to meet new people. I suggest trying to focus on a particular hobby of yours for the time being and try to socialize based on that, you'll have a higher likelihood of finding people you can sympathize with.

These people you talk about seem to have made up their minds about you and nothing positive for yourself can be gained by persisting in keeping them around you, even filtered through another group of acquaintances.

You say you're not "social", I think that is part of your problem. You talk about these people not like they were genuine friends but like they were the only people you could find that you could hang around with at minimal effort on your part. I think you'll have to make some real efforts into putting yourself out there and meeting new people, it'll help you cope.

About your anger, try to use that energy for something else, like working out. It's very hard to be angry when you're busy or tired.

If she says something nasty towards you just say something equally nasty back. She will respect you and leave you alone.

>>18208624
That's terrible advice, that's just going to cause unnecessary drama and OP is going to look like such a bitch at this girl's wedding. Given that she hasn't met her boyfriend's sister, we can assume that she hasn't met lots of his family either, and that's going to create such a negative first impression on them too.

OP, be the bigger person and let it go

>>18208616
The most important thing here is your bf's attitude. Does he told you all of that just to prepare you not to be shocked? Or he expected you to do something about that?

If he expected you to do something, he'got no control and no balls either.

Just nod and smile, op. Even if his sister or maybe the whole family is a dick bitches just smile don't give them reason or more ammo to nag at you. Be a bigger person who don't start shit if it's unwarranted.

>>18208588
>What can I do now
You have already done (or failed to do) it.

>>18208588
Grow up or shoot up the school.

>>18208588
It Depends if she is a nice person just ask her to explain the shit further and she might just think you struggle to understand and will let you off, if shes a bitch tho best thing to do is to bend over and ride it out

I used some of them to, since my legs were cold. "You can cuddle up to me, whatever, I don't care." End up telling her I'm into her and she likes me too. We hangout and cuddle and bullshit for like 45 mins, don't wanna make a move and seem too eager. Ask me if it'd be OK if she took her pants off for comfort. "Yeahsurewhynot" end up making out a bit, but again she was drunk and I didn't know how serious she was and didn't want it to be a drunk mistake, plus I don't have much experience there so I freeze up a bit and don't quite know when to make a move. Eventually I fall asleep next to her. Wake up a 9:30 and realize that the phish tickets I want go on sale at 10, so I rush home. Got my tickets. Then start to realize that I barely made a move on this girl all night and left before she woke up and what if she sees that as me not being interested?

Decide to hit her up later that night on facebook, just to give her my number and see if she would wanna hangout the next day after I got off work. She tells me she has to work late (I had the morning shift that day) but we could hangout before work. Again don't wanna seem eager "OK, just text me if you're not busy and wanna hangout for a bit." She hits me up the next night to tell me sorry she got busy before work. I brush it off, nbd. Today I asked her if she would want to hangout after I got off work. She says yeah. Come out and her sisters and her are just sitting in the car, they're up front she's in the back. I sit down in the back next to them and hung out for a few hours just talking and smoking joints. She barely talked the whole night, was super quiet which she usually is but still something just seemed off and so I ended up mostly talking with her sister who I've been friends with for awhile but asked her if she might wanna go see band with me next week if we both don't work she said yeah if she doesn't work (we both don't know our schedules for that yet). Friend sister goes to bed and the other one ask the one I'm into if she would drive her home. She ask if she can stay. I just kinda say "hey if you guys are leaving, I'm just gonna head home. Take it easy." Do you guys think I messed up? Did I come on too strong or not strong enough? I feel like I blew it but idk.

>>18208521
Here's my advice for you:
Format your fucking paragraphs. Seriously, a wall of text is confusing to keep track, and makes people not wanna read it. Structure your shit, relevant topics in one paragraph, other topics in the next.
Secondly, only tell us what's relevant. I don't give a shit how much you smoked before hand, what you are wearing, or how wide your asshole gapes. Just tell me what's important.
Lastly, always, and I mean ALWAYS include a tl;dr if you're gonna make a huge post.

As for whatever you were asking for, I don't care.