Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1931. page

Why does accusing her enter into it at all?

It doesn't matter if she is or isn't. If her behavior is fucked, break it off. And if she's fucked up enough to suspect she's a sociopath, that's too fucked up.

>>18211315
k. keep me posted.

>>18211339
Well I'm caught in the grey area where she could either just be wonderfully weird or sociopathic, or anywhere between
The main reason I'm suspecting sociopathy is her erratic communication. Sometimes she's all for it and then just drops the conversation before I strike up another in a few days or so. Sometimes feels like I'm just being played, but I can't discount my own insecurities either

Change will always come from within, and suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Hold out and keep it movin

Just think about that there's other people who are in the same boat as you or worst. I'm one of them and am 25 never worked, never really attended college. I am really lazy and shitty. I live with my mom who is widow and for some reason I am so selfish I don't help her with anything. I know I'm a jerk and should care about her but perhaps I don't. I got no right to treat her bad or live off her. Weve always been poor but I just don't have any energy or social skills to get a job. I never go out nor made highschool friends. So at least you have more family, a love relationship and work experience. I never tried to kill myself because I think is childish and not worth it. Maybe you'll find an interest in life someday. I should say we but you know well that time will pass and you will find a purpose in life. Many of us feel that way. Just find something to distract you from feeling pessimistic. Idk man, like I found a band that someone cheers me up whenever I listen to them. You can find or do something that will motivate you to go on. Dude also get rid of the gun and drugs if any. Maybe the thought of having those things around you make you feel shitty. I know we are missing out but sometimes loneliness is better at least for me. Be selfish or lazy if you want. Some day you/I will change. Hope I make sense. But we'll find some strength or sign to do better. Feel better.

>>18212088
Man I'm so repetitive. I need sleep but you know what I mean. Sorry about that.

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>>18211095
Fitness.

That's it. Get blood flowing through regular cardio three times a week. Lift weights and build muscle three times a week. Sleep often, eat healthy foods.

Being fit will balance your chemistry out and you will feel happier. You will also look better and feel better which makes you happier. You will fit in nicer and more attractive clothing so you will be happier. If you watch funny videos on Youtube you will not help but chuckle, if not for a little while.

>>18211095
Is it you from earlier?
Same answers bub

If you have hypothyroidism (which is very serious for more reasons than depression) or a chemical issue that actually causes your depression, drugs are a must. Its just reality. No drugs, no life. End of story.


Otherwise, most of the time its caused by your health (eating bad, poor sleep, lack of exercise, shitty job, social problems, no accomplishments etc..) and you need to get all that on track. Drugs can help A LOT here but in these cases you dont need them if you can get yourself going.


Talk to a doctor. Not /adv/. There are so many causes, some requiring drugs, some not, and no one here knows you.

>>18211230
I'm pretty sure I'm just depressed because I'm a failure who doesn't deserve better.

>>18211062
Please help me, might not sound like it but I'm understating the problem. Last week she invited me to study and I ended up hurting myself on the way home when she ignored me and stopped studying to talk to another guy. I feel like such an unwanted, hideous person and it's eating me up.

>>18211062
Get a fat girlfriend

>>18211115
You hurt yourself?

Both are great but I think Hong kong will get boring after a few days. Tokyo has more stuff to do and you could spend 2 weeks there i think.

But go with your gut feeling.

To be honest if it were me I'd do Hong Kong and then get the bullet train to shanghai and back again as pert of the same trip, a few days in each. A chinese Visa was about £40 when I went a few years ago and the bullet train was cheap too.

Watch out for the escalators.

>>18210954
Tokyo ..

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basically the extroverted Bro is also what happend to me and it is very helpful.

But to your question: There are quite a few mindsets that you can pick up, to help you.

1. In the grand scheme, it doesn't matter what you say to whom. Most communication does not matter at all. if you leave out sexual harassment, threats and insults, you can say anything and get away with it.
2. You need one skill to make this work: Learn to take a hint, when you are beeing obnoxious. If you are introverted, you have a headstart in this and can often times trust your feelings. But you can start out with cutting the conversation short.

3. If things don't work out right, or your senses are failing you, that is no problem either. Once was at a club, a group of girls is coming up next to the vip area in which I am, a girl is staring me down all the way of them coming up and past me, so I ask her, what she is looking at me like that. She just said "dont fucking touch me" when I wasn't even doing that and it felt kind of bad at first. But I coped with thinking, well her loss. And basically confirming number 1. There are no bad consequences to failing. hell she could have slaped me in the face and it would have been a funny story to tell my friends. She could have gotten me thrown out of the club and i would have laughed my ass of.

So it all boils down to one thing:
instead of beeing pessimistic, be optimistic and think positive and things will work out easier than you thought. Because negativity compells people while optimism pulls people towards you.

>>18210678
Realize that your fear doesn't matter.

If they think that, you'll never talk to them again anyway.
If they don't think that, maybe you'll hit it off.

Someone not wanting to hang with you isn't a horrible thing, it just means they don't want to fit whatever reason. So why waste time caring about why they don't? Find people that do.

>>18211017
>>18211025
Alright thanks

Any more advice on making friends in uni just in general?

Make sure to put it in your mouth and have her come repeatedly.

Grab her by the pu-- oh wait nvm

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eurgh im so conflicted

Ex is ex for a reason, regardless if it's on your side or his.

Move on.

Why and how and we can work from there.

>>18210592
Ill save you the long ass science explanation but trust me im educated in this shit:

Relationships are addiction. Human pair bonding is based on highly addictive hormones that are released to make sure you stick with a partner. Its evolutionary.

You are literally experiencing heroine withdrawal. Of course you want him and only him. Same way a crackhead wants crack and only crack.

Itll go away with time. Many of us have experienced this. It sucks. It goes away. Deal.

>>18210589
[cont.]
It goes without saying that this isn't very manly. I think I mustered enough confidence to be a decent boyfriend, but the way most women I have met are, they unsurprisingly enough cling to traditional roles in relationship even if publicly everyone is about equality. I hope I don't sound like I spite women for this- the roles are more of a society thing- but that's just how it works.

What I mean by this is that even though I am kind of starved for a contact with a special someone (not really sex, more like companionship), I ultimately am a man, that's the role I am given, which means that if I was witnessed during that kind of a weak moment, in a better case she would be terrified, in a worse one disgusted. Either way it would mean I would more likely than not lose the person I have gotten attached to, and I stopped dating because of that happening and leaving me feel abandoned. I feel even if I told them and they would accept that I have this issue, they couldn't go on upon witnessing it. It's just out of character for a guy, and I cannot exactly expect the comfort to snap out of it from a confused/scared woman.
Considering I have been unsuccessful with all the ways I tried to curb them for nearly two decades now, it's safe to say they will occur again. During family life, scaring my kids. If I even get to that point because I cannot imagine how a woman would put up with my "issues".
I don't know wheter I'm ranting or asking for advice at this point. I just don't know what I can do, but at the same time I'm not sure there is anything I can do. Thank you for making it through the wall of text. [2/2]

Scared Machi because cute things make me happy and it kinda fits.

I'd like to tell you that they don't care brother, but that would be a disservice to you. Even if they say they don't think less of you they will. They won't respect you and if they don't respect you they won't love you. The good news is you will get over it one day and have a good relationship. Showing any kind of weakness to a woman is a bad idea.

>>18210589
You're attributing far too much energy to these panic attacks.

The manner by which you refer to these attacks insinuates to me that you've likened them to a seperate entity; an uncontrollable source of fear working tirelessly towards your eventual destruction.

Whether or not this is the case, you need to take a deep look inside because these attacks are just a product of your own mind.

>>18210569
- Be dominant. Make the first move. Put one hand on her waist, pull her closer, and the other hand on the back of her head and pull her face closer to you and kiss her. Nothing worse then long awkward tension where you just really want the guy to kiss you but he's too shy to do anything, and so are you. So please just make the first move, it really turns most girls on anyway.

- Close your eyes. Nothing weirder than keeping your eyes open during the kiss. Open them sometimes if you want to see everything is going good, but keep them closer majority of the time.

- Start of slow. If you say you get nervous, don't just rush into the kiss and eat her face off. Start of slow, because that will calm you down and give you time to adjust and work up a rhythm. So start with slow kisses, gentle, gradually getting harder and faster. Try match her pace.

- Do not kiss more than her lips. Do not take big kisses or bites, that go a lot over her lips and start moving closer to the nose and the chin. Nothing worse than someone slobbering and gnawing at your face when you just want to be kissed on the lips.

- Alternate between kissing the bottom lip and top lip. Keep your mouth slightly opened, but again do not take too big bites? (If that makes sense)

- Use a little bit of tongue once you get into the rhythm. Do not dart and poke. Sensually touch her tongue with yours and so forth... Just go with the rhythm of the kiss.

- Body language. You should be able to tell if shes pulling back, or if she doesn't like tongue or whatever else. Try match what she wants. Girls like different things.

- The rest. A great makeout session is not just about the kissing. Use ur hands to touch her body and face. Stroke the back of her head. Hold her face. Run your hands along her waist. Grab her booty if you can be cheeky already. Just do something with your hands ok.

That's all I could think of.

Keep at it; the only way to purge performance anxiety is to perform.

not OP.
>>18210583
u know anon that's amazing, thanks.

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Lightened it to be able to see its wings structure.

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You can see the bumps on toilet paper for scale. Sadly I have no scale nearby right now.

To be precise, I live in Stockholm in a place where it's common for people to rent the place for a month or so and leave.
And it is 6°C outside.
I couldnt take the picture of the wood powder as I put some tape over the holes. But it was extremely finely ground wood powder. Not chunky as most google pics showed.
I was thinking if the place got fixed before i moved in or the wood settled and thus naturally grinded against each other to leave this residue. Or maybe just where it wasnt treated, it got powdered off with time because its not the best quality.

The bug was really dark brown to black in color.
Smaller than a housefly and bigger than an ant.

>>18210479
Jelq and penis pump until you got horsecock or just convince her to ditch that shit with your high impact wild sexual violence. But really, dildo still couldn't replace the warmth and sensation of real penis you don't have to worry and insecure about that.

hire a bull

You're not. It's a sexual accessory, it's not stealing your girlfriend. If dildos were the be-all-end-all of sexual satisfaction, then women wouldn't bother dating in the first place.

You're literally being emasculated by your own thought process.

You can't fix her. Just get out and save yourself. At this point it is your fault if you end up miserable with her.

Fuck her daily

>how do I fix her

You don't. She can, but she doesn't want to. You can't drag her to become a functional member of society.

How does she live now, without a job? With her parents?

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mfw people still believe in a myth call midlife crisis. Just live your life, fuck everyone's old fashioned suggestions like when you're gonna start a family and don't fall in traditional bullshit they'll tell you like why you're still single, why you are still a gamer and you should stop watching MTV and start watching CNN and Fox News. Thanks to millenials those traditional stereotypes will die.

>>18211441
Same here. My 30th is in May and I don't get the entire fascination. Everyone is asking me what crazy midlife party am I planning and I'm like "meh, whatevs, lol."

>Midlife crisis begins during the 50's

>Quarterlife crisis begins at 25

30somethings are in their quarterlife crisis.

I know shit is rough for you right now. I'm sorry that I have been like this through the process of it. I know I wasn't too supportive in the past, but all I can do my is try my best now.

Hang in there and fight. Don't let it get to you, you're a strong woman. Always been, so it's good hear that you are working for your future. I was way too self-centered, kinda wish I could have seen it before. Sadly, we sometimes become blind to our own faults and let them get out hand.

Thank you for helping me see all this. Regardless of what is happening now, I truly appreciate you and the time you gave me. Take care. I wish you the best.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77R1Wp6Y_5Y

Your voice felt so right. I'd do anything to hear you laugh again. I wish I knew where you were.

How the fuck do you figure out what to do in life? I'm 18. I have had a job before working part-time at the supermarket. I have a gf and I'm happy but I just don't know what career to chose or how? I'm thinking about joining the military or going or doing a degree but I don't know how to decide. Anyone going through something similar?