Where's our next Elliot? I'm bored. I know you're reading this right now. Can you hurry the fuck up so we can be entertained.
>would be funny if we had a new columbine happening every week
Are you mentally retarded? That only would bring more brain dead normalfags here. Where were you during the Oregon shooting? This place was in shambles. The only funny thing to come out of it was that plenty of news sources thought that Eggman did it when we told them that.
>currently in an airport waiting to get on a plane for Vancouver
What can I expect over the next week I'll be there?
>fatfags will actually defend wanting to fuck this
Just found out I have a phimosised penis.
For those who don't know what that means it is just more forskin than is normal.
It can also mean the forskin is dificult to pull back but luckily I don't have this issue.
Any uncut robots out there like me.
What is it about /r9k/ that attracts so many guys with phimosis? I have it too and I see threads about it semi regularly. Are all phimosislads doomed to robotdom somehow?
literally every guy with a foreskin has phimosis when young, it's like the male version of a hymen
just gotta keep stretching it, you're supposed to start naturally as a teenager when you begin masturbating/getting boners
you play an instrument right robots?
Can I have a definition of Stacy?
>3 snickers bars
>1 family sized bag of crisps
>5 slices of pizza
>2 ring dings
>1/2 can of frosting
Does it get better?
Suicidal femanons how do I maintain a relationship with a suicidal femanon who is mentally fucked but loves me.
Make her feel like she does something in life, make her feel as if she has value (buy her something nice, it'll help her feel like she's worth something), give her a reason to get out of bed, give her stuff to do
She probably just wants to feel like she's worth something to someone and that someone needs her
Make sure you're there and available, somedays she's not gonna want to talk about and just wants a normal conversation, but be there for her if she has a breakdown. Also remember: if a suicidal person suddenly acts really happy and upbeat it means that they might actually be killing themselves if you doubt you can teak it out just call the cops.
>it's penis inspection day
What do you do?
What the fuck is penis inspection day?
What kind of rapey fucking school did you go to?
>have guinea pig
>name him Starks after tony starks in iron man
>i like iron man
>get injured on the job one day
>my insurance doesn't cover my injury
>don't get proper care
>permanent irreversible damage that impedes on daily tasks
>husband gets tired of taking care of me after a year
>leaves and takes half of everything
>mfw Starks is all i have left
>take care of starks as much as i can
>he's the only reason i keep going
>the big bag of food i use to feed him runs out
>he needs new bedding
>i can't afford it
>mfw i can't work, husband left me, and i can't even provide for the last thing i love
i wanna buy him but i still live with my parents (still in high school) and idk if they r cool with me randomly buying a guinea pig also she's listing him for $75 :(
Maybe find a summer job, that should cover it. The price seems a tad too high tho, maybe there are some extras coming with it. Also literally what the fuck happened to this board, first women now underage kids, at least its not another trap thread, thank god for that.
>can't even see a realistic way to fix my life anymore
>when you already know there's literally no realistic way to fix your life
It's a depressing feeling, but a little bit liberating in a weird way.
>August 1, 2017
The clock is ticking. How are you going to make this month the start of your epic comeback?
goddamn it, every month I know this thread is coming and it still gets me every time
new semester of college, this time I'm hoping to fix the perfectionism that's crippled my productivity. Also only taking 10 credit hours
>2020 is less than 3 years away
>Closer to 2030 than to 2003
> started lifting weights, eating healthy, no fap
> all to impress a girl at work
> having nice conversation with her and she dropped the B word.
> smiles and continue conversation and finish long day of work
> go home and ain't even mad, just feel numb and empty like i got hit by nihilism bomb
Any guy here desperate enough to be my sugar daddy and buy me stuff? I'll give you attention and love
Just put an ad on craigslist. You'll have a dozen thirsty responses inside ten minutes.
That said, if you're whoring yourself out for money, you don't get to be picky. Whatever guy is willing to pay for access to your vagina is guaranteed to not be attractive or charming enough to get it for free.
>tfw no slob belly gf to pamper like an empress
crashing the immobility thread with no survivors edition
Something tells me we'll be the only two people in this thread. Anyway, I love slob belly gfs!
Um. You there? I would really like to talk about slob belly gfs.