Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6614. page

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So I've been going out with this girl for about half a year now, things are going really well and it feels like we're an amazingly good match.

However, she recently mentioned she had a fuck buddy, and if it were ok with me, she'd like to keep that relationship alongside ours.

I don't really know how I feel. I want to say sex aint nothing but sex, yet there's still a feeling of anxiety when I think about her also fucking someone else. Like our relationship suddenly isn't as important, or that I'm slightly less important to her. I can't quite place the feeling, but it is a little uncomfortable. Moreover, she had a fuck buddy which is available to her, but I don't, which feels sort of unfair.

Anyone know how to feel about these feels? Does anyone have experience with sexually open relationships? I'd appreciate any thoughts you have on the matter.

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>21female
>I'm not overweight but I'm certainly not skinny,
>My friends would probably rate me a 6.5 at best
>Ive tried all the generic stuff like going out to bars, online dating
>the most I seem to get is maybe a conversation and then after 10 minutes they seem to get bored or I run out of things to say or worse talk to my friends
>I really don't know what to do should I just give up now: unnatractive and no redeeming personality to help with it :(

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Anyone else losing their trust in women when it comes to dating?

I think I might be at the end of my rope on this one. Something always happens, something always backfires, in ways that are exclusive to the people you date; and I do mean that they happen in ways the can *only* occur with those people.

There's also the constant problem with communications. They either never say what they mean, or put very little connotation behind their words, that it leaves you constantly guessing, wondering, whether you should take anything they're saying at face value, or worry that there's more to it they're not letting on (expecting you to somehow figure it out). There's also when they stop responding or grow more quiet, always claiming it's nothing for you to worry about, yet leaves you with having to one day find out that it was just the opposite; and the consequences, or shitflinging between you, just gets worse as a result. This leaves you, once more, invariably second guessing yourself and everything they do and say. Because now, when they're slow to respond or (for example) forget to reply a text message or something, you can't fucking tell if it's just them or something is up to cause more drama in your life.

Because of bullshit like this, you find yourself being extra careful around women, and cannot help but to mentally list out all the possible meanings and scenarios of potential happenings just for something as small as a girl say "hi" to you. I never have this problem with anyone BUT women. I still don't understand how an entire gender can have so many complications just for stuff as small as communication; and I don't understand the amount of back firings and consequences which also comes from those small things. This makes it very difficult to trust even just one woman.

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My cats have fleas and I can't afford to get them to the vet for a week or two. They seem to be especially irritated my one cat and he's constantly scratching and the bites are getting irritated and worse. Are there any home remedies that will at least help them to feel better/scratch less until I get them treated? I put a little proxide on the bites. I don't want to put any cream on them because they'll just lick it off and get sick and it'll fuck up their fur. Is there a safe ratio of benadryl I can give them? If so how can I get them to eat it? They only eat dry food so it would be difficult to mix in
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My boyfriend(30m) and I have been dating for about a year.
He used to be really heavy into drugs, but quit a few years before he met me.
ABout 3 months ago, he asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome with one of his guy friends.
I wasn't sure, but figured whatever, let's give it a go. It was a great experience, and we both had a great time.
SInce then, we've had a threesome with a different friend, though sometimes repeats of last friends, every week. Maybe twice a week at most.
After about a month and a half, he'd just say he wasnt feeling into it, and simply watch me have sex with whichever friend was there. A few times he would even leave me there for the night. He was cool with it, and so was I.
Last weekend, we went to a bar, and met this new guy he claimed to have known for a couple years.
He went back to his friends hotel room, and had a threesome, and then he said he was heading out.
Me and this guy had sex a few more times, and afterwards, just laid there and talked.
He was really cool to talk about, and knew alot about engineering(my major). This college talk lead to him asking me, "Is that why you do this? So you can pay for college?"
Uh What?
Apparently I'm a prostitute. I have never been so fucking disgusted in my life. My own boyfriend has been selling me!! They weren't his friends, they were customers from craigslist!!
What do I do? Can I call the police? How do I prove this when I don't know any of the guys names? I agreed to the sex so they didn't rape me, I don't think.
Please someone help me. I feel so fucking gross and alone right now

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Hey /adv/, how can I move to New York City?

I've lived in Austin for a while and think it's time to change things up.

To be honest, I'm scared to just do it. I don't know where to move, or even how to find an apartment and a roommate.

my question is, where do I start? How much money would I need to make to rent a cheap apartment? What about with a roommate? What would be the best part of the city to move as a 27 yo male looking to socialize with others his age?

Also, anyone from New York have any experiences, advice, or warnings?

Anything would be appreciated. Pic related

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I'm attracted to somebody only until they're attracted to me. What's wrong with me and how do I get over this?

>10/10 silver Fox
>dressing all cute for him and shit
>really just want the D
>he asks to go out off coffee
>I brighten up his day
>acting like a love sick puppy
>I immediately shutdown

>8/10 Israeli cutie
>kind of a geek but really suave
>cute accent, very talented
>start to flirt
>he tells me I'm beautiful and shit
>he wants me at art conventions with him
>shut down, cut contact

Am I broken?

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i bought my mom a\ tablet for christmas. and im stuck between unboxing it and setting it up for her, or letting her unbox it and set it up herself

i dunno what she would want to do and i want to keep it a secret,,'

Help?

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Is it still my fault even if I don't date Chads? Its not like I seek out 10/10 men. The 10/10 men that hit on me I ignore and brush off. I usually only give serious chances to more humble, sweet guys and all the guys I've been in relationships with were 5/10 or lower. So is it still all my fault that I end up with men who start being abusive and cheating?

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My girlfriend I have just met in college(4 months together, 2 months dating) has an ex boyfriend of 5 years that she broke up with a little after he joined the navy. She has facebook posts about how in love she is with him and what not. She has told me how much she loves tall guys before and he is 6'6" and I am 5'8". I feel physically inferior to him, and she has a lot of history with this guy(like you could make a shitty country music video with a collage of their past and them growing up together).

Before the break started, he started texting her about how he is coming home for christmas. She didnt tell him anything about having a new boyfriend and she texted him with a lot of smileys and what not(I read the text messages and we talked about it). He wants to see her, and I know she wants to see him. She told me she wouldnt go see him if I dont want her too but I would have no way of knowing if she did because I live in a different state. When I first met her, she cheated on a boyfriend of 2 months with me. She said it was because she was unhappy with him and knew it wasnt going to work out. Well in a series of events, she hasnt been able to go see him yet because she has been busy with getting teeth pulled, wisdom teeth removal, going to see her dad in a different state, and what not. Today, she told me she isnt going to get to see him due to time conflictions(but I dont know if I believe that). I need advice on how to handle this and what to think. This is my first girlfriend.
>pic related

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How fucked am i? i have a date with her on tuesday....

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Just recently got my first boyfriend whom I love very very much and that I want to spend the rest of my life with, but the problem is that he doesn't have a job. He lives with his parents and doesn't have any future plans whatsoever. He just basically sits at home all day just playing video games.
Now I don't have a problem with this but how do I explain this to family members and friends? I'm more of an outgoing ambitious person and it's kind of embarrassing when people ask what he does.
Do I help him finding a career? Everytime I bring up the subject he keeps pushing me away and doesn't want do talk about it. Am I just being silly?

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Been straight my whole life, except at one point being attracted to my /fit/ roommate 9 years ago (nothing happened).

>inb4 I just want the D
I've had a 8 year LTR, I've fucked 10 women in total (5 this year, 2 of them for 2 months each.) I absolutely love women, and there's nothing I like more than eating a girl out and fucking her for hours.

However, I just sent a message on a dating app to a transgender, because recently I've been thinking about it, and basically I've figured out that traps don't repell me, only masculinity. There's no way I would get into bed with someone manly. By the looks of it she's most likely bottom, and I'll admit I might want a bit of the D, but not as much as I'd like to fuck someone feminine in the ass, so it doesn't really matter. I generally gravitate towards skinny/fit girls, and beautiful faces. She's nine years younger than me, and I think that helps as well. I think it would be fun to try at least, but I'm not going to go looking for another one if this one isn't interested.
>inb4 her/she
For the sake of convo, let's just call her a she.

I was straight-forward in my message, although she said in her description she wasn't interested in chatting or hookups only, I asked if she was pre-/post-op and bottom/switch, and told her that I was curious for the first time in my life, only been with cis-girls previously.

She checked out my profile. I might get a reply, and I might not. Seeing that I'm used to talking to women, and I know how to hold a conversation as a man, I can't help to think that other rules apply when one talks to and treat someone born male. Are there things I could just skip in the seduction process? Personally I don't believe that trans people can ever fully become the gender they identify as, since chromosomes. Is there something I should consider doing different to how I would approach girls?

>TL;DR how to date traps

Enlighten me ITT, family

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This will sound pretty fucking retarded, but here it goes;

Any good ways to self-inflict pain without leaving any long-term side effects, such as scarring etc.?

I'm not emotionally unstable, or anything like that. I'd just like to increase my pain tolerance, aswell as the self-control of pushing through the pain and to not give up.

Apart from extreme endurance training (I do once a week), cutting and electroshock, I'm not looking at alot of good options.

Impaling myself with needles? Hold my hands in cold water?

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I'm male, 25, handsome and earning money, and romantic life is just too fucking painful to actively pursue.

Women I could spend the rest of my life with are few and far between to begin with. I was raised well and have an inquisitive soul and would say I'm very forward thinking but like everyone else I have baggage.

About 3 times a year I'll meet someone who I have enough of a connection with to start believing they might be someone I could share my life with and it always turns out we're incompatible. They're all very intelligent and open and I'm not able to be completely truthful and open with them because I have a paraphelia that can't be entertained or even admitted too in this society. I would be an idiot to let someone know what I'm dealing with internally without knowing them for a very long time or maybe even never.

I let them in as much as I can but they feel that I'm holding something back, there's a dissonance somewhere below that I'm not showing, a lack of depth to my 'openness' that only allows me to go so far on certain topics because they can't know a part of me that is forbidden to be expressed.

About once every two years someone gets through and we seem to work but then the same thing happens as before in a more drawn out way.

I met a girl recently who was perfect. I really thought it was going to work and it crashed and burned last night. I'm so sick of opening up and being hurt.

Is there any remedy to this? Or am I just an outlier on the edge of humanity who's too strange to find another?