Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6621. page

>>16583082
Cont.


Found my neighbor on Grindr, didn’t know it was him at first, but I did when we met because I’d seen him in his yard. He lives 2 or 3 doors down. Besides the fucking, he likes to come over and play video games and drink beer and chill away from the wife and kid which is all good. I think his wife is a bit annoyed that he spends so much time at my house but she’s always cool as shit to me.

The guy is kind of insatiable and he really likes my body which is kind of a new thing for me. I mostly have to overcome the fact that I am not traditionally handsome with women but he loves all the shit I don’t really like bout myself, ie. My body hair, chubbiness, small cock, etc. He loves to fuck I think and just has an appetite for all kinds of shit. I get the impression he and his wife still do it on the reg.

My concern is her figuring shit out and me being in the middle of that kind of drama. My life is drama free on purpose but I am the one who’s created this situation. He’s over at my house way too much, I had to tell him not to ever contact me electronically in any way and even HINT at fucking. I mean I love the fucking, he’s cool as shit to be around and we get along well but I’m not sure how long we can keep this up before shit comes down.

How about stop being a fucking degenerate, grandpa.

That's the best advice I can give you.

>>16583107
Thanks! Will do.

>>16583084
After reading what I wrote, yeah, it's stupid. He and I have talked about limits and appearances. He just does not seem to take it as seriously as I do. There is no emotional attachment at all, def from me and almost certainly from him so we could break it off.

It's the most satisfying sexual relationship of my life though. Everything I want and nothing I don't. Except for the threat of drama.

pfbbbt.

He took you out to dinner and paid for it? You don't do that unless you're interested.

>>16583068
romantic actions dont have to be explicit, be happy and grateful he didn't just go to make out with you at first. he wants to be a gentlemen about everything and probably because you haven't seen that before, you don't know if he's just being nice. he does have interest in you and he's mature about it, and with that i can tell you he would think of your feet being near his crotch as being on hip lap, not his junk. it wouldn't make him uncomfortable

>>16583074
Yes, he paid, and he always compliments my looks, it's incredibly kind and sweet of him. But he has't made any move to kiss me or even hug me, he just rubs my back and plays with my hair.

>>16583067
dying's never gonna fix problems with how you feel or situations because the situations are bad due to emotions, even if they're responses to what happened, those emotions stay with you. my friend is going through similar stuff and has been suicidal for some time now but when i remind her this, she remembers and re-realizes that she has to just do her best to pick up her life. she's a good 30-50 thousand dollars in debt without a job and having not finished her degree at college. the problem is things don't end or immediately get better when we leave our bodies. and i hate to think about how many people only realize that until after they recognize they're still conscious after killing their body and then have all those emotions to still work through (as well as the emotions attached to killing oneself) because i'm sure it's ten times harder than doing your best in the present and practicing self-forgiveness. it's hard at first and no one's perfect but we all have to forgive ourselves and make up for our mistakes

>>16583164
Look I get it, you think that I can pick life back up even in the worst situation... I disagree, I played chess with life and it beat me so bad that if I didn't an hero, I might as well go on a hunger strike and suffer the damages till death

Need methods of suicide please, I can't deal with this shit, money is literally the root of all problems and I'm not willing to tolerate it anymore

What you do is build a time machine, go back to his childhood and instill good personal habits in him.

He's a slave to his lifestyle, and with the increased freedom and comfort of adulthood he's slipped into not giving a fuck. Simple as that.

>>16583012
time machine? xD if only...
and slave to lifestyle describes him completely. and the search continues as to how I go about emancipating him.

>>16583119
You can't emancipate him from himself. What you're saying is ultimately "I want to free him from his own choices." Careful there massa. He's an adult. He has every right to surrender to his lifestyle instead of being proactive.

It would be better for you to come to grips with having chosen poorly. Trying to fix him is to start walking down the road of the sunk cost fallacy.

Go to a local library and read, maybe

Please don't delete your thread and start a new one just because you don't like the advice people gave you.

And get a fucking job.

>>16582956

The gym?

See if there's a rec center nearby if you're worried about cost.

A library isn't a bad idea either, you can basically just sit around and keep shitposting.

How the fuck can you prove you had car trouble..Just take a picture of your engine bay and say that piece wont work.

>>16582932
they want a paper trail of repairs

Call in sick next time and say you had some Chipoltle the night before.

time heals everything, but the most important thing is to keep moving forward. time will help, but you can't get trapped in a endless cycle.

and learn from this experience. be a realist with the next girl you meet. you HAVE to accept that you don't own her. it's just your turn. never catch feelings.

>inb4 beta virgin wah wah

i've been in two serious relationships and both ended in disaster. 5 years and 2 years. relationships are a waste of time with girls these days.

>>16582927
But how can there be more turns on both sides, I mean, if you tell someone that you love her, that she is really the world for you and you mean it from the bottom of your heart, how can you tell that to someone else?

Is it all just fucking meaningless?
I don't get it. I don't understand anything anymore.

>>16582915
Time's the shit.

Nope. However I question the wisdom of staying in this profession.

Your reasons for not drinking are absolutely no business of theirs and they should not be pressuring you and putting you in this situation. They're at fault, not you. I think it's very smart and responsible of you to be aware of your family history and to refrain from drinking. Say whatever you have to in order to make the drinks go away.

Basically, lie your fucking ass off and don't feel bad about it. I absolve you.

>>16582892

Because while the people often annoy me, I absolutely love the work and I've put 13 years into it. I'll probably retire early though.

>>16582897

As silly as it is, it does make me feel better than someone doesn't think I'm a tool for doing this.

>>16582713

The way they treat you is ALL your fault, you let it happen being a beta orbiter and her sister knows that you are pathetic
Improve yourself for YOU! not to other pathetic people, stop thinking about it
Being successful is the best way to laugh at people who you despise

First of all, you acted like a fucking autist. It was probably obvious to them that you were trying your hardest not to notice her so that's why they decided to fuck with you. If you meet someone you know don't try to "not recognize" them, it will only lead to a more awkward situation. I don't know how obnoxious they were while making out, but I guess it wasn't that bad since no one else told them to fuck off, so ignoring them was fine (I guess), but the moment they moved next to you in order to record you or take pictures you should've confront them and ask what the fuck are they doing.

Onto the revenge part, there's probably nothing you can do, at least nothing legal. If you suspect they're doing anything that can get them into troubles with the law or at their jobs you can try looking into that, but it's a long shot. Otherwise, just deal with it.
Or, if you really are so petty that you can't let this "go unpunished", then you can always fuck with her house/car and hope you won't get caught. But I'd advise against this, as nothing good will possibly come out of it.

>>16582760
Honestly? SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

I'm sick and tired of male shame. All that happened was 2-3 years ago. I wasn't the same person. I'm trying my best to be a socially adjustable person, but it's a hard fucking road. All I know is I shouldn't be a push-over.

>Don't be successful for other people

>Being successful is the best revenge

Way to contradict yourself. This isn't a fucking coming of age movie. This is REAL LIFE pathetic people don't become successful. People who don't take shit from people do! People who aren't afraid push down other people for them. I'm simply asking for revenge on HER. Not her sister.

I already felt like shit after the whole thing and learned my lesson about love. Doesn't mean I deserved to be bullied some more.

GO AWAY!

What excuses ?

>>16582676
Don't over think things. How have you been asking her out? Next time just tell her that you're going out and she's welcome to come. Leave it open, but also if she makes up an excuse again then just leave things be and forget about her.

>>16582693
First was she was tired from a workout, cool
Second was that her family suddenly asked her to do stuff last minute, which is whatever
Third time was that she wanted to save money, which I just took as the sign to stop trying, because when you ask to have lunch with someone specifically, you're usually paying for it anyway.

It's called learning to be a polite, socially functional human being. You might not be a sociopath, but your brain is seriously missing a few pieces if you think like this:

>They'll talk about all the typical superficial bullshit to help validate them and get them through their day feeling accepted

It's called relating to other people. Even if you're a total robot, you should be smart enough to know that this isn't just pointless time-wasting unless you have literally zero ambition. You can't do anything alone in this world, you need people behind you, you need to actually make friends and build positive connections with people in the places that you work and live and spend your time.

Don't be some cold, standoffish bitch who thinks she's too good for everyone, or you'll suddenly find that none of your co-workers like you, and you have no chance of advancement at this hospital, and no chance of a good recommendation to help move you to another work environment. Whether you like it or not, everyone needs friends. You can spare a few fucking minutes of your precious time to acknowledge the people around you. Get over yourself.

>>16582637
Have you ever seen a TV documentary about monkeys or chimps? (Stick with me - this is going someplace)

They often sit together, picking nits out of each other's fur. It's called Grooming. But scientists have worked out that, while getting rid of nits is nice, what the monkeys are actually doing is finding an excuse to sit together and express their friendliness.

Humans don't pick nits off each other (much). Instead we make small talk. But it's the same thing. WHAT we talk about is not the main point - THAT we talk together is. 90% of small talk IS banal and trivial, and nobody is really interested in it, because the real point is "We're sitting together and affirming that we're friends"

That is why they react to your not joining in - without realizing it you are saying, in monkey language, "I'm not your friend."

It won't kill you to chat about the weather or last night's TV for a few moments. And it will make you part of the community.

>>16582637

>I couldn't care less about my coworker's lives or them in general

How is that supposed to come off as anything other than cold, angry and snobby? What makes you so great? You already admitted you're just an errand girl, they could fire you in a second and replace you with a talking, functioning human being. Unless you're some rich girl who doesn't really need the money, you might want to try a little harder to build relationships with your co-workers.

You really think they have nothing valuable to offer you? You're so much better than them, they couldn't possibly offer you any advice or information or help that could be of use to you? If you actually make an effort to be friendly and talk back, you might get deeper conversations than "typical superficial bullshit to help validate them."

Bitch.

I'm also curious about this.

Never seen a point beyond the possibility of having sex, and there's easier ways where I don't have to endure a shitty couple of hours before having sex.

File: Flange.jpg (309KB, 575x431px) Image search: [Google]

309KB, 575x431px

The whole point of parties is to let go.

>>16582533
What, like, of my inhibitions? Dance and get drunk and scream WOOOOOO?

The problem is I don't wanna do any of that shit. I'm not a shy person secretly craving to do that. It's just not fun.

>If I ask him to fuck me he might not want to

Di... Did we just discover Female autism?

> Sadly he was too drunk to function.
> I really enjoyed my time with him because how much of a gentleman he was.

wut, a drunkard gentleman

>>16582297
Sadly it does happen, idk if it's because of a lack of challenge or what, but its not rare.

>>16581959
>I'm only attracted to girls that I know.
>How do I develop attraction for strangers?
Get to know some strangers.

>>16581959
Grow out of your friend circle and try to meet up new people, dude. If you keep on this level, it can affect your friendship which you value a lot.

>>16581986
Fucking /thread

Have you considered that she just doesn't think about you anymore?

>>16581931
Yeah, of course she doesn't. That's what I want to change.
I miss her. And I didn't like, do anything wrong to piss her off or anything. Why can't this work?

>>16581921
The fact that you miss her does NOT mean that she has to miss you.

The fact that she doesn't contact you DOES mean that she doesn't want to contact you.

The fact that she doesn't just say "Go away and stop contacting me" means that she was brought up to be polite.

It's over. It's not going to happen. NOTHING you say or do can change that. Move on.