Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 403. page

>>18645249
Most important thing is to love and be happy with yourself. I know this advice might've been given to you many times, but you just need to find things to do in your free time so you don't think of hurtful memories

Stuff like exercising, drawing/crafting, and maybe playing games can ease your suffering until you're back on your feat

>>18645268
thanks for the advice man, i've been running 2-3 hours a day in the morning for the past few months without a break thus far. i'm still trying to find a way to shut off, though. the girl i was in the relationship with fucks with me every now and again and some of the friends have started to as well. any way i can just shut all that off?

>>18645298
Just a reminder that taking a break once or twice a week is good just so you don't fuck up your legs

Just block their numbers or social media. Don't even think of giving them a chance to contact you since they're assholes.

File: 1195872.1485702334.jpg (137KB, 1034x576px) Image search: [Google]

137KB, 1034x576px

>>18645245
Lol, people me this all the time. Then they go back to fawning over everything I have. THEN they switch back over to telling me I'm a weirdo because I'm 21 and don't have a GF and my room is unorganized.

>>18645245
No, that's what the older lady saw in her mind as an attractive mate. There are others women out there that share your interests. Maturity when it comes to hobbies is bullshit. Focus on the fun and what you like. Also work alittle harder to find a gf if that's what you want.

That is completely retarded my dude and coincidentally really funny
I am 24 and hate comic books, partying, and travel and my hobbies are cooking and finance, and a lot of my time is spent doing errands around the house/fixing something
I am a complete permavirgin and normies everywhere are fucking astounded that someone can hate things like superhero comics and the travel meme

If you find coding boring you shouldn't be coding.

>>18645726
>>18645241
Yeah I second this. Believe it or not, there's people who are thrilled with coding.

This happens to a lot of people, OP. My uncle thought he was going to be an engineer, but it turned out to be extremely boring to him, so now he's a lab biologist.

Same boat as you, im only doing it cause i get paid to and i want to make games. Coding is boring to all programmers even my teacher admitted that so dont worry

Step 1: Masturbate
Step 2: Make sure you STAY IN THE RELATIONSHIP, and reassure him that.
Step 3: Talk about it with him. Miscommunication is what will kill the relationship, not the sex.
Step 4: ???
Step 5: Profit!

>>18645195
I do masturbate but it doesn't feel as fulfilling I guess. Maybe I'm just being picky? I've tried watching porn as well but looking at another mans penis makes me feel uncomfortable and desu it turns me off.

We do have some communication issues but it's been improving over the last couple months.

Gay

>>18645123
I have dealt with depression twice so far. Both times I needed medication, and also recurred to therapy. The longest I've dealt with it was around 4-5 years, intermittently. The second time I wasn't depressed for long, given other mental issues that I'd had before, I was already past the "not asking for help" phase that some people go through.
As said before, therapy and medication worked wonders for me. Problem is, took me years to find the right person, but I'm stubborn as fuck, so I didn't give up (and well, so are my parents and family, so even when I wanted, they wouldn't let me). It takes patience, hard work, willingness to listen and accept what you don't want to hear. You will need to change things, and that can be tough, but necessary.

Now, as someone who's, at the moment, off meds, I'll tell you, I've never been happier, I never thought I could be this happy and I can even see myself being happier. Everything I did was worth this, and that makes me kinda proud.

Yeah, i ended up losing a dangerous amount of weight and spent most of my time sleeping.
I can't speak for your specific circumstances, but I basically did any and everything someome can do to naturally increase your energy, so eating clean, tracking nutrients, exericising frequently, avoiding the internet, getting consistent and enough sleep, and jacking off infrequently. Slogging through the first week is rough, and the first month isn't much better, but you'll feel alive again after that.

>>18645123
I have been previously stalked by "the black dog" for years since I was 12 years old (I'm 28 years old).

In fact I've just discussed this on /fit/.

For me personally, medication did not work... actually made me worse and I was having anxiety attacks. Therapy also failed because I could not open up properly. I've come really close to suicide.

Fitness...... fitness is what saved me. After attending a session of 'boxercise' (boxing exercise) with a friend after I nearly lost my shit entirely, I felt awesome! I've never looked back since. I workout, go running and compete in amateur boxing tournament's now. I've started therapy again and open up a lot me.

I highly recommend any form of exercise or sport to anyone suffering from depression or anxiety, alongside therapy (I attend Cognitive Behaviour Therapy)

is it social anxiety distracting you from what you really want to say?

Try regularly using a wider vocabulary, even when just talking to yourself. Not using words makes you forget them.

>>18645144
I'm not quite sure. It seems like it though. Also, my mind feels perpetually numb, so perhaps that may be a cause of my problem?

File: 1500264394297.jpg (68KB, 500x750px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 500x750px

>>18645116
It is a struggle. And even worse most of them or insufferable liberals or poly or what have you.

Poetry slams, protests, sports teams, starbucks, conventions are good places to start.

Just remember this is a small percentage of women and an even smaller percent our age.

>>18645127
yeah I've met a few through luck just walking around. It sucks because a lot of them are either gay, taken, or just looking to fuck around. It sucks

Confidence is weird in that you can be completely confident and not look like it, and conversely, you can look like a pillar of confidence and have very little of it. You wouldn't really be able to get through most of your day if you didn't have at least some modicum of confidence, so I think you're kind of undulating over whether you are insecure or have a desire to be insecure.

>>18645111
Maybe you're right. Perhaps it is all about perception. So would example 1 in my OP be confidence or insecurity?

Confidence is beliveing that you can pull something off such as talking with girls or jumping from one cliff to another. The first example doesnt have to do anything with confidence, its more like your own moral code that women shouldnt drive but it could also come from your insecurity like you said. The second example, the girl isnt confident that her boyfriend shouldnt watch porn. Shes insecure about him watching it because it lowers her confidence since she starts thinking hes watching it because shes not good enough, thus she becomes insecure. Hope this helps...

lift weights

Are you a fucking idiot? Why would you want to be like her ex? She broke up with him BECAUSE he was like that, not in spite of that! Seriously, acting like that would probably CAUSE you to break up. Just don't.

Are you 15?

>>18645064
Where are you seeing her?

>>18645074
I can't be specific without blatantly doxxing myself. The most similar common institutions would be a freelancing office or trade school.

>>18645098
Ok so work. I'm just going to say that what ever level of chat you think you need to make with someone to talk to them is, it is actually far less.

"God damn I'm tired of this weather"
"me too"
"I just miss wearing long sleeves"
"blah blah"

You start with the weather and then you segue way into clothes that easily. I want to say it's not hard but I spent many many years wondering what normies could possibly talk about and feeling like I had no way to converse with people but they really do talk about fucking nothing.

>>18645049
Lifting weights cure 95% of autism.

Masturbation is a great way to come into your existential self.

You start asking all sorts of questions for how to be a better persom after a month or two of fapping.

File: introvert extrovert.png (150KB, 600x725px) Image search: [Google]

150KB, 600x725px

>>18645039
That is called introvert and no, you cant change that. If she really wanted to change, she would have done it long ago.

Sge probably need to get introverted bf and be happy forever with him. If you are real friend of her, help her with such task.
>where can i meet introverts
That is hard, because they dont like company. So maybe online?

>>18645052
from that diagram, she is 100% shy. She has recently wanted to become more outgoing because her friend group is slowly getting toxic and breaking apart. She has a seemingly introverted boyfriend, but it isn't really helping anything. I'm not trying to change her, I'm trying to help her.

>>18645077
Introverts dont need friends to survive. If you are sure she has bf (and you as best friend apparently), she is golden.

Make sure her bf is asking her on dates periodically and actually exists. You cant change people.
>group is getting toxic
Are you or her 14? Time to grow up a bit?

File: not dirt nor princess.png (202KB, 540x742px) Image search: [Google]

202KB, 540x742px

>>18645021
>LDR
Long distance relationship is scam. No cuddling, no girlfriend. Sorry, but army is anything but place friendly for getting and keeping women in your life.

Anyway this
http://www.improveyoursocialskills.com/conversation
and pic related. But really, she isnt your gf and sooner or later will leave your sorry army ass.

>>18645137
Not OP but just curious, why do you feel LDR is a scam?

>>18645137
I'm army reserves, I'm going to be home in like 8 days

>>18644987
>join a band
>join a book club (high percentage of women so maybe meet a qt. Downside is a lot of woman books)
>join a hiking group/club

It's really fucking easy. If you live in a city there will be groups easy to find online, if in a smaller town you could find a group for your region/state. In this age of mass communicating there is no reason you can't find people into the same things as you. You simply aren't that special

>>18645010
Clubfag, that's what you are. Everytime people ask for social advice on here it's join a club join a club. Might as well tell them to drink water; it's just as generic.

>>18644987
the thing is anon, you're not supposed to meet normies, you're supposed to meet non-normies like you
trust me, i have been trying to fish up a normie gf for awhile but it doesn't seem like i'm going to reel in anything soon

it's over boyo
you should have passed the highschool checkpoints

joke, I'm in a similar boat. from the sounds of it what you're doing is right so keep doing it, maybe find new hobbies if you still struggle with self-image.

same here, I wish I could help you. all I can do is bump

Yeah I did all the things you did.

>used to be fat
>used to smell and never groomed
>used to say a lot of stupid shit and argue for my opinions
>didn't have hobbies
>never had a single friend

I fixed all of these things, first friends started just comming up on their own. I picked up smoking and light drinking along the way witch I'm not very proud of.

BUT, I now hate all lof my friends in the 4 friend groups I go out in with in a single week. I can't stand looking at any of them, I hate them.

I guess I'll become a loner as I was supposed to be. Also, all these friends and I'm still a kissless virgin at 23.