Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3778. page

>>17594372
Why dont you marry her? Better for her and the baby. Also was she serious in asking you to impregnate her. Or was she doing that thing girls do where the like to imagine a family and mentioned that she wanted you to be the father of her kids. Where you then proceeded to be autistic and think she was asking for you to actually impregnate her now and not in the future.

Erm... So did she specifically say wants to have a baby out of wedlock? Did she ACTUALLY say she wants to have sex now?

I'm not sure if you're just inferring stuff if she's actually stated it.

Anyway, have a serious talk with her before you do anything. Make sure to confirm she DOES want what she wants, and that this isn't something she will regret or feels pressured to do.

As long as she's certain, and you're both comfortable with it, there's no harm in following through.

>>17594378
She said it while we were making out.

>>17594369
>Has anyone else ever been in a similar situation? How did you get out of the rut?

Basically every person over the age of 25 ever.

Hell, one of my younger friends is going through EXACTLY that right now.

Just take a breath, fix what you can now, take a break, and in time you'll realize most of the shit that was bugging you was just you freaking out over getting old.

You can go ahead and plan if you want, but experiencing shit first hand is the bst way.

Find what you want to prioritize in life and what you think would bring you greatest happiness in the future.

Stop freaking out about your career and ask yourself what you'd ideally want to do in the future. Then buckle down and set yourself in that direction.

>>17594369
I'm 20 and feel the same, or at least similarly.

Yesterday was my first day as a 3rd year student in college. I woke up early, shit tired because I couldn't get decent sleep, as usual. I was staring at the ceilling listening to my alarm clock go off and bracing myself for what I was about to do.

All I could think at that moment was really "what am I doing here?" Why should I put myself through waking up early, feeling tired and attending yet another year's worth of classes and stress? I'm not doing what I want to do and enjoy doing just so I use my time to get a stupid degree, find myself a mediocre-paying job, buy a house, maybe date and get married, repeat.

This is all I could think of. Life just seems so tasteless, repetitive and boring. Nothing means a thing. It's all so pointless.
I used question why people comitted suicide, how silly it seemed to not enjoy life in all it's beauty. Now I don't see life that way anymore, I'm starting to get why people kill themselves.

>>17594529
OP here. Go the fuck to class, dude. You're already ahead of me. I'm sure it sucks, but it'll be worth it when you are able to get a job that pays more than $32,700 a year like min.

I would kill to have been 1 year away from a bachelors at 20 years old. You could graduate next year, then spend another 4 years doing absolutely nothing and STILL be in a better position than me. Just go to class, man.

>>17594339
Why dont you try marrying her?
Obviously she only wants to have sex with the perfect guy she loves. But you dont care about that.

>What should I do?

Can you handle this, yes or no.
Quite simple.

There was a time when many good men would wait and respect a womans chastity. They would even proactively turn down willing maidens. What happened?

Surgery comes with the territory of transgender. Have a conversation with her about it, and if it's her final decision, don't oppose it. Communicate, be respectful, know where you stand.
As far as not being a NEET you should really take the GED and get a job, if you show initiative your gf will probably be wiling to help you. You can't lean solely on this person your whole life, accomplish something.

>>17594326
You are right and yeah I'm a neet I guess. Is there anything I can do to mend the situation right now? I feel like an abuser!

>>17594317
>tranny
Heres my issue. It sounds like you are a flaming faggot. but you are a girl dating a guy. But the guy is pretending to be a girl.
Is it gay? Like being a tranny is worse than being a faggot, but I feel weird about you dating a tranny. Since you arent gay, and if the person you are dating wasnt a fucking looney this would be normal relationship.
So since you call him "she" you are also crazy, but does that make you gay?

If you don't go, you'll spend weeks regretting it. I say you go.

Yeah go there and pass a good time with the person that invited you, it's the least you can do and it might end up making you feel better about yourself socially wise

>>17594289

Sure. Gotta start somewhere.

>If I do go it's going to break me if it fucks up,

But you're being over-dramatic as fuck there and basically setting yourself up for failure by already dwelling on the possibility that you will.

On step at a time bro. Stop getting ahead of yourself.

>>17594250
It's cool, dude. Chill out.

>>17594250
Sperm doesn't come out until ejaculation. Until that time, it's just seminal fluid. You're good.

You don`t pre-cum? Right.

Anyway, I would keep an eye open and wait until her period comes if at all. Doesn`t matter for how long nor how much of it was in - anything can happen in this situation.

Good job dating a Jew.

Also, having all of his savings in the bank instead of in diversified investments should have been your first clue that he's not exactly a winner.

>>17594251
We are young...ish. My bf knows how to save, but doesn't know shit about what to do with it.

He also somehow thinks that he is losing 900 dollars when it is just being borrowed.

He refuses to be reasoned with. While I hugged him bye, he's said stupid shit like "hey dont grab my wallet."

This is just such a high stress situation for me. I'm at risk of losing my job and all he cares about is control. I told him he;s being manipulative and he just threatened to not give it to me.

I'm fucked basically. Even if I get the car with his money, I will never hear the end of it.

>>17594260
>hey dont grab my wallet
>psycho fucktard

Correct

>How to survive this hellhole?

Pay him back as soon as you can, for one. I ain't giving you relationship advice but your boy seems more than a little nuts if it's true that he has 20k on the bank. I think both people should pay for their own shit in a relationship and spoiling your girlfriend is typical wimp behavior, but 6 years is a pretty long time to act up like that. I mean, holy fuck.

IMO? He's trying to make a big deal out of this to stabilish dominance\power - probably doesn't even care about the money. Ignore it, fix your car, pay him, review your relationship goals.

>>17594245
Well, I mean the mafia is pretty good at getting their money back, so just get something heavy and wack his knees.

>>17594245
Did you ask for your money and he said those excuses? Or he said them on his own?

>>17594245

This is why I never lend anyone over $10.

The kind of people who borrow large sums of money are the kind of people who never pay it back on their own, always make excuses, and start acting like YOU'RE the jerk when you ask about it more than twice.

Odds are you won't get the money back, he's not going to be friends with you anymore, or both.

>>17594238
Just do it. Blame her when it turns you gay, faggot

>>17594238
It's not doing ass play that makes you gay. It is fucking with other dudes.
You're making a girl do it. Pretty straight.

>>17594238
There isn't anything gay about a woman eating your ass dude. Butt play isn't exclusive to homosexuality. Maybe come at it with an open mind. Be clean, maybe let her rim you with some lube and finger first for the feel.

I think you deserve to fail

>>17594224
fuck you.

>>17594265
That's exactly the mentality that's going to hold you back in life. No one wants to hire someone who doesn't have basic respect for fellow humans

if you can't bring yourself to end it, you still have a shred of hope whether you know it or not. i've attempted and failed thanks to narcan; you'll know when you're really ready to end it. it's likely that people do want you around, that your parents do care for you and want you to succeed, and the reason it does not seem so is that each of our individual perceptions of reality are so drastically different. perhaps your 'friends' do not feel sorry for you, but don't know how to interact with you if you can not carry on interactions yourself. you view yourself as a waste, these kinds of illusions begin to take hold and begin to make everything else seem so much less real.

the second you can train yourself to change your outlook is the instant you'll realize how important your view of yourself impacts how you view EVERYTHING. a socially inept human who tells themselves they're the shit and they're going to succeed will do infinitely better than a socially inept human who does not even attempt to lie to themselves. and believe me, if you want to make it in this world you're going to lie to yourself a lot. we have personal relationships with our own selves and minds, and without a healthy relationship with yourself every other one of your relationships will go to shit. every time you shit on yourself in your head you're bringing yourself further and further down. fuck girls, they don't mean shit. fuck your friends if they don't seem to be there for you, but make an effort to at least fucking try. not every person is going to take care of you. focus on YOU, nothing else. fuck school, if you're not healthy enough to be there you need to check yourself into a pysch and get some meds. being in school isn't helping you, and your life is more important than your grades or your parent's money.

don't take advice from strangers on the internet, but fucking do something for yourself and don't wait for someone else to.

>>17594147
OP, if you have not had any major trauma, any real major events that have hampered you through life, you have a chronic case of despression and hating yourself. get help and learn to find your goal in life, because it seems that what you're doing is pointless for you. make a fucking change. do it soon. do something for YOU. this is treatable, and even if you have something like major depressive disorder like myself, you will at least find a way to make life tolerable and even enjoyable while you find your fucking role in life. this world is shit but you get one shot to make something of it, make this place your own sandbox man. just do fucking anything.

>>17594153
and if you really want to take a stranger's advice, let me try to make it good. get help, real help. i don't know where you live, but a psych hospital is your best bet if you're having this much trouble. people find it embarassing or weak or whatever, fuck people. do this for you. open up to someone that can help; call a hotline. there's one right here on this page that i'm looking at right fuckin now under this post. throwing away your hand of cards is about the stupidest decision you can make before you even know what cards you have. at least make an effort and find something that helps you. an interest, a goal, anything. music, writing, travel, fuck man just get a minimum wage job and spend some dosh on something that makes you happy. but get help first.

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**** want to. I a word or two. Stupid pone. I want to beat these men up. ****

>>17594123

Want to know something funny?

My first love, someone who I, to this day, still truly respect and admire, the first night I met her she told me she was drugged and raped at a party a couple years ago.

My best friend, she has a friend (who I've actually met a few times). Her friend vanished randomly one day. She was freaking the fuck out. They found her corpse two months later, OD'd on roofies and sexually abused.

My girlfriend, on our second date, she pulls me aside and tells me that she doesn't want to freak me out, but she thinks there's some potential here and she wants to put this out there to give me some time to get out if I want to (though she hopes I don't) but that she was sexually abused as a child.

At the time, some small part of me was thinking (Jesus wtf. Seriously? Am I like a magnet for this shit or something?) but I just thank her for her courage and for choosing to share that with me, and tell her not to worry about it (I learned a lot with my first experience with a survivor).


The caper:

One day when she's fucking drunk as hell and full on crying because shits getting fucking hard and she's just had a massive fucking blow out with my dad, my mom drops a bomb and says she was raped by her brothers as a child.

FFUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKK


But whatever, just keep going. Don't let shit get you down.

People deal how they deal and people do what they do. All you gotta do is do the best with what's around you.

>>17594126
Plot twist: it's the same guy


You

Move your alarm clock or phone or whatever apparatus you use to wake up to the other side of your room so you will be forced out of bed to address it

you don't get fully awake in the morning. you trudge through whatever habit you have until you eventually become alert. for some this means you wake up by the time you're at work/school because you lay in bed until the last possible minute. for others they get up and make coffee and go about a routine and somewhere in all of that they wake up.

you just have to change your habits. instead of procrastinating getting up being your default, you're going to have to make getting up and making coffee your default.

>>17594118

Get the fuck up. As simple as that. As soon as the alarm goes off, jump up and out of bed. No excuses. Like it's the goddamned military and your ass is on fire. Get in the shower, or if you shit before your shower, shit.


Coffee can wait until you're awake. Your alarm isn't a suggestion, it is the answer. It is time to be awake. Coffee will make you feel better, sure - but know that when you're woken up, you're not going back to sleep.

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>>17594077
Lol, I only live because I hope I eventually find an actual reason. Every year it gets harder to wake up in the morning

>>17594077

i like sunsets. and peeing in the shower. and going for walks. and laughing at stupid stuff. i like listening to a song so many times i no longer like it. i like binge watching a show if its REALLY good. i like to play dodgeball, or go slack lining or just be naked in public. if im bored, i like to think of something new to fill the time.

if i couldnt find meaning in my life, which is definitely not the case, cuz i kinda came pre packaged fulfillment wise, i would still look forward to just getting a hug from my boss, or hearing my friend make a really stupid 'your mom' joke for the billionth time.

you dont need a BIG reason to live, you can just have a couple tiny ones.

is the day really that much suffering if you ahve time to come home and shit post at the end of the day?

>>17594087
My reason for posting was that I'm depressed/anxious. I did some introspection on an online CBT course, and it led me to believe that my anxiety might be caused by the fact that I don't know why I'm doing things. This might also cause my depression, because the reward system is fucked up. Video games work as a temporary fix, because I can subscribe to their value systems (level up, get more cash/stuff). But this isn't the same in life. There's no obvious thing that's expected.

>>17594101
>i like to think of something new to fill the time.
How do you decide/find if something's worth it?

>you dont need a BIG reason to live, you can just have a couple tiny ones.
How do you know which tiny ones?

>>17594066
She's collecting evidence that you're stalking her.

>>17594066

If a girl takes her shoes off when she comes into your house and accepts a glass of water when you offer it to her does she want you to fist her?

haha man I know exactly what youre like in real life

guess what, youre not going to get anywhere with this girl so long as you neurotically over-analyze every interaction

faggot