Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 3775. page

Excellent question! Following.

everyone who gets the advice they need has no reason to come back.

its the kind of board you only visit when you need something specific.

the regulars tend to mostly just GIVE advice, not ask for it.

the regulars who do ask for advice arent actually asking, they are just whining, so of course have no reason to actually take the advice either.

>>17595739
>the regulars who do ask for advice arent actually asking, they are just whining
More like searching for people that will agree with them when everyone is telling not to something bad or stupid.

>>17595702
Of course your job will be bringing in contacts.
That's what a shitty sales job is about.
Up to you to try or not, but I wouldn't list family or close friends, you know they'll call them.

>>17595708
That's the thing, I don't havr to give phone numbers or addresses or anything like that. They say it's to see what areas I need more training in.

Company is Western & Southern Life btw. They check out and the course is already paid for.

>>17595702

do they require the phone numbers? i dont think they'd make you sell to them, thats not realyl the way insurance is done as far as im aware (my mother did it for a few years when she worked for farmers insurance).

it might just be some testament to your sociability which comes in handy in the sales game.

>I let slip that I might actually like them
gross
>(no sex)
fuck them, a bitch has to be treated like a bitch

Women are fucked up, don't try to make sense of it, move onto the next one.

Had that happen as well, went on a date, really good chat, went back to her place, lots of kissing, fondling, held hands when she walked me back etc.
Then ignores me for a few days and hits me with "I don't think this is gonna work" instead.

This is NORMAL behaviour from women and there's no point trying to analyze it or make sense of it. Just accept it, start chatting to other girls and next time don't get emotionally involved so quickly.

>>17595684
You're right, cheers man. It's just a bit disappointing when you don't have a lot in the way of a social group, because girls don't come around as often as you'd like.

>>17595604
break ups and getting over people are hard, give it time, it's only been a short period of time.

I usually go with the half rule, it takes half the time of dating someone to get over them. It gives you a margin of safety knowing she's not obsessing over someone she dated 4 years ago or whatever.

Just try and be good to her and make her happy, it'll help her forget and be less tender

>>17595604
Maybe she gets frustrated because you keep mentioning him.
It is normal to miss people who once were important in your life. It doesn't mean you want them back.

>>17595622
She was with him 2.5 years. So that would make sense :)

>>17595651
I know it winds her up but I get really anxious etc when I see these 'signs' and I worry the whole time unless I say something

>>17595562

I think it kinda weird you guys been talking for 3 months and only met twice. Anyway, if you're sure she got the message, it looks like she's just no invested in this as you are. You've got nothing to lose trying again after a week, but the prospects don't look good.

>>17595562
Tinder is mostly for one night stands, she probably just wanted the attention you gave her after a while, and as soon as you wanted more she bailed.

>>17595584
>I think it kinda weird you guys been talking for 3 months and only met twice
well, its been on and off; mainly because of me, I'd take a long time to reply to her, and then not say anything for 2 or 3 weeks at a time.
once I gave her my number we met up pretty quickly. that being said, i haven't seen her since labor day weekend
>>17595605
yeah i guess it could be that.
we didn't actually have sex or anything; so thats why i feel a bit confused.
I guess i'll text her-?
im not even sure what to say.

Dump her

Sorry, but how hold are you? You should know how unimportant that kind of stuff is. She's with you now, so why would you care about that? You say you're not, but this practically screams "insecure, immature and borderlien racist" to me.

Bet you also have a sexual history, parts of it being due to experimenting. Would you want to be judged for that?

Take a deep breath and consider how much this girls means to you. If this is enough of a reason to break up for you, then you don't deserve her anyway.

Your disgust stems from your internalized fears of inadequacy; be honest with yourself. Anyone who feels any sort of way about a girl's past boyfriends, no matter what their ethnicity, is giving voice to their own insecurity.

If you can't get over it, your only option is to dump her. You can't change the past, obviously.

Bruh. You just gotta not give a shit about it.

There's plenty of things in life that matter, this is one of those things that don't.

You know that saying "don't sweat the small stuff" bingo lingo right there, man.

Relax, watch some TV, smoke a joint, jerk off, and get on with your life man. No big deal.

I often get a lot of work stress, and it's been effecting my home life. So, I've been constantly telling myself "it's just a job, it's just a job" it seems to calm me down a little bit, and stop me from shaking and puts my mind to rest.

>>17595532
You'll frel like shit for some time, that's just what happens when you break up. Maybe you've gone through it yourself in past break ups. It's probably the lowest point you've been at for years, it's like that for most people. Just keep going, it's only going to get better in the next months. This woman was destroying you.

>>17595718

I am trying to see friends and smoke. Hopefully in the long term will be better. Thank you for your words

>>17595810

She was my first girlfriend so no, I never broke up. You are right anyway

>>17595523

>Implying that everyone who's living a life of mediocrity is lacking motivation/skill
Sometimes your best is just average. Does that scare you that much? Being like everyone else?

>"I now that I can do it if I work hard, but I need a non-vague concrete reason"
Unless you DID do it before, don't give me that "I know I can do it" line, because no you don't. You think you have what it takes just so you won't bum yourself out with feeling of worthlessness.

>Give me a reason to live life, /adv/
I swear I'm not trying to flame you, but this post really comes off as incredibly whiny to me, OP. If you need time to think do so - or at the very least let's discuss this feelings in details. How old are you? What classes are you taking? Have you any work experience? Have you any experience at all, in anything?

>>17595552
>1
Yes it does scare me. I want to have something that sets me apart in order to feel worthy of satisfaction.
>2
I get very good grades. All A's so far. My pitfalls are perfectionism and sustaining motivation. You are definitely at least partially right as I tend to drop classes that are too difficult, although I resent your pessimistic attitude. If I overcome my perfectionism and become okay with the occasional C, then I will have a better chance at success.
>3
I won't deny my whininess, as a person my primary concern is of my feelings. I'm 22. I've taken English, Soc, Psych, and College algebra. Dropped multiple specialized Bio classes after discussing my current level of knowledge with the instructors (I plan to ask my counselors to put me into introductory courses instead of trying to skip ahead). I've worked at a couple grocery stores, factories and restaurants. I have a pattern of working very hard, setting high expectations and then burning out emotionally thus letting everyone down. I'm becoming better at regulating myself and working at a realistic pace (knowing my limits)

Does this help?

>>17595523
WHAT do you want? You give vague examples, but as long as your desires and goals are so unthoughtful, your effort will be lacking.

Figure out what you want out of life. Then, figure out how to make it happen.

If you want a blowjob that's not from a slut and not from a whore, but don't want to have to raise a relationship then just do it yourself, that's not how it work

God, whoever wrote this crap is fucking retarted. Kill him.

>>17595501
You're confused.
Try writing it again, in 20 words or less.

No.

Of course anon, why not ?

>>17595496
what's wrong anon m8?

bump, can't believe this is already at the bottom in like 5 minutes

>>17595484

You're basically her ground zero she can return to when it doesn't work out with other guys. Sure beats being single, for her, at the very least. She'd cheat on you in a heartbeat, and would create some fake-drama for the sake of it, I'd bet my ass on that.

I'd get out of the relationship and see where it goes from there. I'd also cut all ties, but it's not always that simple and isn't always necessary.

>>17595484
see
>>17595507

This has so little chance of working it's not even funny. Besides the distance, which is already a big fucking deal, both of you'll be meeting a bunch of new, attractive people in the next few years.

Move on before you become her spare tire. If she actually liked you, she wouldn't be contemplating possibilities.

>>17595447
You could date her.

>>17595447

This is the start of something great buddy, i too dated my best friend. It was fantastic, all those months of friendship and inside jokes, small quirks you know about it each, do's and don'ts that you are familiar with when with each other. Its great. I had my doubts too but once i took that step forward i never looked back.

Despite this though it's worth considering that if things do go sour between you two... heaven forbid. That not only do you lose a Girlfriend, but also a bestfriend.

I did, i still think about her every now and then

>>17595466
How did you go about starting to date?
Neither of us have brought it up since she said it, and I don't know whether to be really serious about it, like "You're so important to me, we are soulmates" or something more casual, where I just kiss her when we're hanging out some time.
Also, thanks for the reply and for what it's worth, I'm sorry to hear about that
>>17595457
I agree, what do I do to do that?

No one's got any advice for me?

Ask her questions that don't allow her to ramble or give on word answers.

For example, tell me the most interesting person you ever met in your life and how did their meeting effect you.

Set the tone to be deep but make sure to be playful. Joke around here and there but let her see your vulnerable side.

I am only saying this shit because you seem to like this girl. Normally this would be resolved for girls you want a future with.

>>17597283
Cool. I think I've got a couple of ideas with that. If it works out and we get more lunches and dates, any advice on the timing for officially asking her out? Because in high school I was too nervous so I ended up asking a girl I liked out way too late into the year. Then college rolls around and everyone finds a significant other within the first week even when they're complete strangers, so I ask this girl out and I guess it was too early. I'm just not sure how close we have to be beforehand. I'm pretty shitty at this as you can probably tell.

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4MB, 581x327px

>>17595413
Insecurities, yes most definitely, it's fairly easy to pick out that she's afraid of commitment and may just be using the child excuse to push you away.

I think, given time, she'll see that committing isn't nearly so terrible as she's been raised to believe.

Are her parents divorced and/or have a bad relationship and take it out on her?

>>17595413
Yes, shes compromising.
Her want to not have kids probably wasnt that strong in the first place.

>>17595413
>>17595449
>I'm like you just can't change your mind about something like this, it's a life long decision.
>Yes, shes compromising.
3/4 of all the young people I've ever met have at one point said that they don't ever want to have kids. Most of them change their mind at some point.

let me know if you find out

I can't get over that

girls enjoy being used sometimes

they look like victim and they have nights of fun

>>17595308
She had sex with them because she wanted to. She wanted to fuck them. There's nothing inherently bad about it, but stop treating her like a poor innocent girl manipulated into sex by two bad guys.
If she didn't want to fuck them but wanted commitment, she could have avoided fucking till well into the relationship. It's that easy.

You either get over this or break up with her. There is no other way to solve this issue. If you cannot deal with it, let her go.
Just remember that since you lost your virginity, you can now stop pulling this bullshit with your next girl since, if you expected her to be virgin after you fucked, you'd be an hypocrite.

>>17595308

>>>/r9k/

Just skip the inevitable 50 posts calling you an insecure faggot and go straight to where the like minded idiots live