Anonymous
How do you stop thinking about someone? 2017-01-31 01:42:41 Post No.18007973
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How do you stop thinking about someone? 2017-01-31 01:42:41 Post No.18007973
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How do you stop thinking about someone?
Anonymous
2017-01-31 01:42:41
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I am fucking cursed /adv/. I swear. I met a woman 5 years ago. She friend zoned me and I still think of her every day. She never texts me first but I text her first all the time and she responds.
I like her and I know she probably does not like me. How do I stop thinking about her? I have tried dating other women but I date like maybe 1 girl a year. I am 26 now and still have had zero relationships.
Anytime I date another girl I get this feeling like "I really wish you were the girl that friend zoned me so long ago."
Like, I just can't stop thinking about her and how much I like her and how bad I wish I could have a second chance.
How the fuck do people get over something like this? How do you get over missing out on perfection? HOW!?
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No contact. Also look up limerence forums for better support. Although, those are just wallow-fests.
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you have to get to the point to where you don't need anyone but yourself.
go workout, develop some skills and hobbies and before you know it you'll be 30 and you won't give any more shits about her
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They are not the perfect being you make them. Try and remember that and stop putting them on a pedestal.
Once you enter a relationship you will notice your partner's flaws one by one. It might be (extreme) jealousy and possessiveness, caring about tidiness very differently than you, them being triggered by some weird thing you just happen to find normal to totally flip or become passive-aggressive, them being lazy or very driven and fighting with you over how you handle things, them having a weird obsession with their family or people who are not good for them but refusing to acknowledge that, them having different sexual needs, ...
Everyone has a few of those. Not all will make YOU want to rip your hair out, so you need to find someone compatible. Someone who cannot see themself getting into a relationship with you is NOT compatible.
If you struggle to find interested people, it's likely the problem is you. However, since you should constantly be working to improve yourself anyway, it can only get better from here on.
Anonymous
I have lost all love for 99% of people, there is no going back. 2017-01-31 01:40:58 Post No.18007968
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I have lost all love for 99% of people, there is no going back. 2017-01-31 01:40:58 Post No.18007968
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I have lost all love for 99% of people, there is no going back.
Anonymous
2017-01-31 01:40:58
Post No. 18007968
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See them as bunch of greedy, selfish, annoying, stupid, dumb assholes who talk about obvious shit all day long. I have tried, and tried, and tried some more, I just cannot relate to them anymore, they seem like little 9 yr olds to me. It's hard for me to have a conversation because the entire time I have a fake smile up and a fake attitude of being interested.
But if I just sit there and mind my own business, I lose my job, I lose my influence, people start plotting against me. What the fuck do I do? so sick and tired of pretending.
Growing up I used to find old people cool and fun to hang out with... but the last two years even they seem dumb.
Yes, I know exactly what I sound like. An arrogant idiot who is full of himself. I really am not...... I just need someone I can love or relate to. Not sure how I will life a life, get a wife, raise kids when all I do is pretend 24/7, it's exhausting.
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>>18007968
Ahh OP, you truly don't understand do you? It's simple really. The culture you are seeing at work or in public was designed to be very simple and broad so as to be highly inclusive to nearly every person in society. This is important, as it makes navigating many public situations very easy. The reality is that the people you are complaining about have much more depth then they appear to. They more or less fake a smile as well, and it can be that an entire group of people talk about something to none of th have any interest in, but only talk about it because they believe everyone else in the group has interest in it, since it is something that everyone knows of. Take sports. Sports are a very easy thing to understand and watch, and so the general culture and society places a high value on it to allow maximal inclusiveness. See what I'm sayin?
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>>18007968
just kill yourself dude
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Eh I kind of know what you're saying.
A lot of times I just zone out during a conversation and just start going "Yeah. Yeah. Uh huh. Yeah." and nodding my head pretending I'm listening.
I think I was meant to be alone, and it sucks.
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I've found over the years that the only things I'm good at are writing and politics.
I'm not a big fan of writing, even though I'm relatively good at it. But, I am very passionate about politics and have been told by countless people that I should get involved.
Is this hard? How do I begin? Is this a stable career choice?
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>>18007935
You usually start in a certain partys youth club, then you become chairman of the youth club. Thats the first step.
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>>18007946
Or.. thats one way of doing it.
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>>18007946
Is it even worth trying, though? I graduated from Appalachian State, not some expensive school like Harvard or Yale.
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I've never had any romantic relations with anyone until a few months ago. Now it's fucking up my life. I've always been attracted to women, but I never was interested in anyone enough to ever ask someone out. There were a few times I made out with girls and a little bit of heavy petting but I never followed up with that shit. And neither did they.
Anyway, back in October a girl who I had been friends with for a while starts cuddling with me and eventually goes ahead and grabs my dick. For a good long time. I, at the time was tripping balls. Around the peak of my shroom trip actually. So I was kind of sketched out, and didn't reciprocate with her at all. The next day she texts me saying she was sorry and felt like she used me and felt shitty about it. So I comforted her and basically said it was nothing, though it was probably something. I definitely was weird about it. Then she asks if I want to come over and I do, and we make out and we go a little farther and I go to finger her. She gets off so easily. I had never even done it before, but oh well, guess it worked. Then she starts going for my dick again, and tries to jerk me off, for like half an hour, and I just tell her to give up.
After this we're hanging out pretty often. Nothing gets said about a relationship or anything, but it's nice to have someone to cuddle with. And she's pretty cool to talk to. She still can never get me to cum. We'll sit there for sometimes up to an hour with me just going soft. Sometimes I even doze off. Meanwhile she orgasms like crazy. Multiple times when I go at it. We're both virgins, and she wants to save it for something special (I personally don't give a fuck) but I'm pretty frustrated about things not going both ways physically. So I end it all with her. We have the same friends, and it's just ugh. She shows up to parties I'm at just crying in the corner, she gets fucked up and is all over me, and I'm just in some really awkward situations.
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One night we're both drunk and I, like an idiot, come back to her place and the same shit happens. All for her, none for me. Though honestly, I do enjoy seeing her get off. The next morning it's like we're a thing and I'm just a pussy and go along with it. For like a month or two. She's super clingy, very sensitive, way more into me than I am into her, and it's just too much. I'm not in a great place myself either. So I end it again. This time is even worse. I was playing Catan with some friends and I take a break to go get some food and she takes over for me. She ruins the game for me on purpose, but whatever it's a board game. Who cares. Just really petty. On top of that she's throwing things at me all night and saying shit like she's allowed to be angry and I kind of just say nothing. That weekend, she's at another party I'm at, and me and a male friend are fucked up. So we think it's a great idea if we kiss for a funny picture and it was a great idea but she freaks out. The guy has a girlfriend. A long term one. But my ex is just sobbing, everyone is surrounding her helping her out and whatnot. I feel like a douche so I just leave. We weren't even together that long. We hadn't even fucked. She's way too into me.
Since then we've hung out a few more times. Each time I tell her "Hey I don't want to be in a relationship, if this is going to wreck you tell me now". But she keeps doing it and keeps getting wrecked. So I took it upon myself to stop. This shit is weird for me. I don't have any experience with this stuff except with her, so I don't know what to do. I can't cum with her, I don't know if that's her fault or nerves or I'm just too good at masturbating or what. That's not even the biggest problem. She's cool to talk with. We have similar interests. I love having someone to cuddle and be intimate with. But fuck. In public she's too much, in private she's very sensitive, and she definitely kind of obsesses about me. Any thoughts? I'm so lost
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Oh and on top of this I'm also waiting to pass a kidney stone at 20 years old. That's fucking me up pretty good too.
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Stop masturbating
Your dick goes soft cuz u only know your hand.
Once you get hard enough, stick it in her.
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>really into chick friend
>tell her how i feel
>soft rejection
>shes now dating a literal manlet neckbeard
how do i get over this, its killing me inside everyday.
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>>18007894
Sounds like you dodged a bullet OP
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>>18007899
her taste in music is shit anyways.... still hurts
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well if she chose a "manlet neckbeard" over you, it sounds like she didn't have too many options or she was right about not choosing a guy who would name-call his competition and then cry about it.
man the fuck up, there's plenty of pussy out there and they all have different tastes in men. you might even be someone's preference. how nice would it be to have someone actually attracted to you instead of chasing pussy you'll never get?
Anonymous
Girlfriend doesn't listen 2017-01-31 12:56:17 Post No.18007880
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Girlfriend doesn't listen
Anonymous
2017-01-31 12:56:17
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My girlfriend doesn't listen to me anymore.
I've been trying to discuss why I've been upset with her as of lately, but she keeps tuning me out. I think her intentions are good and she's trying to calm me down, but I'm frustrated with her and instead of turning a ear to listen she's focused on "curing my frustration".
She used to be more focused on hearing me out. It's truthfully very upsetting that my voice isn't being heard.
What do I do?
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>>18007880
Bump
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maybe she's the one who needs to talk
Have you tried hearing her pov ? Sometimes, it's really exhausting to always be here for the other and being a listener more than a talker, you get to feel lonely.
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>>18007955
I always listen to her problems. She's told me it often helps.
I tried talking to her about mine today, but she jumped to "fixing my frustration", not hearing it, if that makes sense.
Anonymous
Friend In Dsitress in Florida.Help? 2017-01-31 12:47:32 Post No.18007866
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Friend In Dsitress in Florida.Help? 2017-01-31 12:47:32 Post No.18007866
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Friend In Dsitress in Florida.Help?
Anonymous
2017-01-31 12:47:32
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I have a friend she is about 50 years of age.
Had gone to stay with someone in FL but that didn't work out.
Moved on with two cats and some belongings in her SUV and was able to get a job and rented a professional studio space to possible start up her jewelry making business again but before she could do that lost the job she got and was told she can't have cats in the studio.
She doesn't want to let go of the cats and has through this week before she has agreed to vacate the lease and get her 4150 sec.dep. back at which time she will be homeless and broke.
She is not a Florida resident so doesn't qualify for any Temp Aid.
Was previously employed in Colorado and before that a NY resident self employed jeweler selling her wares at craft shows.
Recently sold her home but spent through that.
Burned her credit out after being rear ended in a car accident and being thrown out of her Mother's home.
Has a son in College on scholarships. A very bright promising guy.
I need ideas to salvage this person's life..
She is beyond the end of her rope. She is talking about just dying..
She's willing to work but doesn't want to abandon the cats and will by the end of the week have no place to park at night and sleep in her SUV which is also not registered.
let's hear solid ideas.
I tried to impress on her that letting go of the cats will open more doors but she says she'd rather die.
I suspect Toxoplasmosis Gondii because these were outdoor cats.. So think crazy cat lady syndrome.
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let her cats stay at some friends temporarily? or other family members
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>>18007884
How would the rental mgmt know she had cats anyway.
It's not like they make much noise and you don't have to walk the cats. None would be the wiser if she just quietly kept them in her apt.
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Tell her to look to see if any veterinarians/ cat rescue groups will look after her cats for her for a while. That way she can stay at her current apartment a little until hopefully she finds another job and an apartment that allows cats.
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Can I just send a girl "hey" on tinder and ask her what's up and go from there or do I need some funny snappy line?
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>>18007779
snappy lines are known to help but sup works if she finds you attractive
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depends on the girl, some prefer a simple "hey" others prefer a snappy line. a snappy line will probably net you more responses whereas a simple "hey" will probably go ignored since you have to remember a shitton of other guys are messaging her at the time.
sometimes you wont get a response no matter what because shes trying to juggle 30 conversations at once.
tinder is a crapshoot
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>>18007779
You could, sure, but it's so dull an opener that unless you're good looking or she's not getting that many messages for whatever reason, she might not be too interested. It can work though, if you're good at building convo from there on. Trial and error.
Anonymous
Ex girlfriend pissing me off 2017-01-30 11:59:30 Post No.18007765
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Ex girlfriend pissing me off
Anonymous
2017-01-30 11:59:30
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>Broke up over a month ago, nothing bad happened she just said she lost feelings and going through a lot (which to be fair, she has)
>But we was always good together, I was her first serious relationship and longest
Since then she's been really hot n cold with me. It's like she only wants to fucking talk to me whenever its good for her. She tells me she don't want a relationship yet started talking to some guy, even went to meet him twice but he never showed up. I was like wtf are you doing wasting your time with someone like that, at least I'd actually bother with you. She just pushes me away. Week later she's telling me to just move on and be happy. I start talking to another girl and suddenly she gets jealous. Saying it was a mistake for her to try and move on but not saying to get back together because you've moved on. Then I was like wtf, all I wanted was you now you tell me this, we argue and she blocks me. Then unblocks me, argued some more, say lot of mean things to me, blocks me. Seen her in person few days later, she apologises, we talk, I find out she is talking to yet another guy. I tell her why can't we just talk properly and work things out and she's like nahh I'm good. She tells me I'm hard to understand, I tell her no I'm simple as fuck, I love you and wanna be with you, then I told her why are you wasting your time with immature boys, they won't make you happy. Then she don't reply then I said said well. Then she's like what do you want ffs, I said waffles and for us to talk and she's like not in the mood for jokes and don't wanna talk then blocks me again.
WTF IS GOING ON
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>>18007765
You're trying to be friends with an ex while both of you clearly still need space and time to recover and get over each other/the relationship. It never works immediately, because one or both still have some sort of feelings, good or bad, and there will be too much drama for a friendship. Cut contact for now, try again in a year or two if you're still interested in being just friends.
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>>18007780
I'm not trying to be friends with her lol fuck that. I already told her I can't just be friends. And she knows that. I just wanna be with her, and I know she still likes me. But maybe the whole no contact thing would be good to let all this negativity go away. I just don't want her getting with someone else because she'll blow any chance of me taking her back at that point.
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Cut-The-Bloody-Contact.
You've tried communicating rationally. It didn't work.
Cut contact before you both cause some serious damage to your social circles or just make fools out of yourself.
Anonymous
A long tragic tale about my nonexistent sex life 2017-01-30 11:39:09 Post No.18007708
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A long tragic tale about my nonexistent sex life
Anonymous
2017-01-30 11:39:09
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I've been in a relationship for 5 years. At the start the sex was frequent and enjoyable. Both of us would initiate equally. I've always been more successful with my job than my boyfriend and always had more money and financial stability. He's always been a directionless and comes from a poor family so I wound up being his only support. After a few years him always needing my help and being a bit ungrateful became annoying. I told him he needed to start trying to do something with all the help I was giving because he'd just take and take. Slowly I became less sexually attracted to him because of his lazyness. I stayed because he was a good personand I felt the relationship was still worthwhile. When we moved in together I got him a job working for me. At this point I'm running my own business. I thought this job would help him but he got worse with his lazyness. Half assing the work I would give him and just eating shit and playing fucking league of legends all day. So then he got fat.
Recently he's gotten his shit together better and has a second job so he's not always needing me for money. His attitude is better too but the years of having to be supporting the two of us and watching his lazyness has just killed my desire for him. I've told him everything that has bothered me and he agrees thag the lazyness and weight gain were a problem and is trying but I'm just unable to feel any sexual interest. I'm ok not having sex because there are more important things in a relationship but it's really bugging him. I've told him I don't mind him seeing other girls but he only wants to be with me. I've done sexual things just to make him feel better but that's not enough for him because he wants me to enjoy it too. Anyone ever been in a similar situation?
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>>18007708
>the too long to read
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>>18007715
I warned it would be long. This is what I get for being desperate enough to air my problems here of all places.
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I think you seriously need to reconsider the reasons you're with him. You don't sound happy at all, nor a good match.
You say there's more important things than an enjoyable sex life with your significant other. That may be true, but it's still a huge part of any relationship. A relationship without desire is doomed to fail.
Besides this, the way you write about him, it sounds like you stopped properly liking this guy a long time ago. Nobody wants to be with a lazy fatty, especially when you yourself are successful.
Rather than simply staying with him because he's a nice guy or a 'good person', sit down and either write a list or at the very list consider reasons why you should be or shouldn't be with this guy. Because right now, this reads as a cry for logic from an outsider's perspective because you're too scared to change your current situation or unsure of whether what you truly want is the right thing.
I'll give you a hint though. I think you need to ditch the anchor.
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Recently I have been having doubts about my intelligence.
I always did well at school, learnt to read at age 4, and had my IQ tested by a psychologist when I was 15: I don't remember the exact result, but it was significantly above average.
The thing is, those tests were done a long time ago and recently I've been quite frustrated with myself because it seems that I fail at many things I try to learn or undertake: driving, picking up some hints in a film etc. I know those can probably be explained by stress or some other factors, but it kind of bugs me sometimes and I have a long list of insecurities already.
Should I get a professional IQ test again to calm my doubts?
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>>18007705
Your probably miscounting. You probably count only the failures but never the successes. I bet if you recount you would find a 95% success rate
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How often do you read?
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Could be that youre not sleeping enough and thus have a bad concentration during the day
Anonymous
How to start talking to a girl in my class 2017-01-30 11:33:01 Post No.18007693
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How to start talking to a girl in my class 2017-01-30 11:33:01 Post No.18007693
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How to start talking to a girl in my class
Anonymous
2017-01-30 11:33:01
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So this is a pretty straight forward situation. Girl in my class, she's cute, I wanna go on a date with her and have a nice private one on one conversation. Have never talked to her before however she has accepted my friend requests on both Facebook and Instagram.
My question is how exactly do I approach her once we all get up and leave class.
"Hey, you know who I am right? I added you on so and so. This is a little funny but would you wanna get lunch sometime and talk for a bit?" Is that too straight forward? how would you guys approach this?
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Grab her by the pussy.
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you should play it casual, say "hey, wanna grab a coffee/lunch together?"
that in itself already implies you want to talk with her anyways. unless you're really attractive, that extra garble will creep her out/mark you as desperate or awkward.
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>>18007693
Have you ever talked to her? Does she even know your name? Do you know anything about her besides how hot she looks? For example, do you know if she is even single?
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Any chances of getting a kiwi for a pet here in California?
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>>18007656
Aren't they found only in Australia? Also, why a kiwi. You have a choice between man's best friend and a bird, and you pick the bird?
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Good question, I'm not much of a dog person plus there are so many dogs where I live and a kiwi looks like a fun animal to have around for stupid memes.
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Basically I want to make the kiwi the next shiba doge
what the heck's happening to me
>be 18 female
>have rather healthy diet
>sleep around 4 am but still manage to get at least 7 hours of sleep
>starting to feel sick for the past week or so
>start feeling anxiety around the same time too so no clue if i'm actually sick or it's just the anxiety
>all of a sudden start having small random tremors like hands shaking for no reason
>no drugs or alcohol involved
>not diagnosed with health conditions other than some scoliosis and pollen allergies
could this be due to some underlying medical issue or just shit sleep schedules/anxiety? does this sound like i should get checked out or can it just be easily fixed by forcing myself to sleep earlier or whatever?
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>>18007647
>be female
Nothing to see here folks. Just another troll
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>>18007654
kek just though i should add that in because i know there's some conditions that affect a certain gender more so
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Go to bed earlier and drink more water. Don't worry about it
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So how are you supossed to keep a conversation via text interesting and fluid? I've been getting really well whit my oneitis past week, she spends a lot of time on her phone, I try to ext her but I basically have no idea how to keep the convesation going after a few texts, any advice?
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>>18007646
>So how are you supossed to keep a conversation via text interesting and fluid?
By having something in common to talk about that you both care about. Also, by having stuff going on in your life that would be interesting to the other person. And don't forget to listen to what the other person has to say. That always helps.
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Send her a picture of your khram.
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Personally I don't really text conversations, I use it to set up a time/place to speak in person