See them as bunch of greedy, selfish, annoying, stupid, dumb assholes who talk about obvious shit all day long. I have tried, and tried, and tried some more, I just cannot relate to them anymore, they seem like little 9 yr olds to me. It's hard for me to have a conversation because the entire time I have a fake smile up and a fake attitude of being interested.
But if I just sit there and mind my own business, I lose my job, I lose my influence, people start plotting against me. What the fuck do I do? so sick and tired of pretending.
Growing up I used to find old people cool and fun to hang out with... but the last two years even they seem dumb.
Yes, I know exactly what I sound like. An arrogant idiot who is full of himself. I really am not...... I just need someone I can love or relate to. Not sure how I will life a life, get a wife, raise kids when all I do is pretend 24/7, it's exhausting.
>>18007968
Ahh OP, you truly don't understand do you? It's simple really. The culture you are seeing at work or in public was designed to be very simple and broad so as to be highly inclusive to nearly every person in society. This is important, as it makes navigating many public situations very easy. The reality is that the people you are complaining about have much more depth then they appear to. They more or less fake a smile as well, and it can be that an entire group of people talk about something to none of th have any interest in, but only talk about it because they believe everyone else in the group has interest in it, since it is something that everyone knows of. Take sports. Sports are a very easy thing to understand and watch, and so the general culture and society places a high value on it to allow maximal inclusiveness. See what I'm sayin?
>>18007968
just kill yourself dude
Eh I kind of know what you're saying.
A lot of times I just zone out during a conversation and just start going "Yeah. Yeah. Uh huh. Yeah." and nodding my head pretending I'm listening.
I think I was meant to be alone, and it sucks.
>>18007998
>>18007998
Yeah i have the same fucking problem dude, I don't give a flying fuck about 99% of people I only started pretending after I kept getting issues from people who accused me of arrogance.
>>18007968
Welcome to the light.
The best thing long term for you is to find another job where you don't have to deal with pleasantries, and "culture".
Good luck.
>Not sure how I will life a life, get a wife, raise kids when all I do is pretend 24/7, it's exhausting.
We're all acting all the time. Even now, I'm acting, you're acting. The word 'person' comes from the Greek work 'persona' which means basically an actor's mask.
There's no magical way to attain some sort of status where you don't have to act. The closest and most relaxed you will get is having a shit on the toilet, or taking a shower, because only in the toilet is there true privacy. And you can't spend your life in there.
When you get to the stage of acting as if 'you've figured it out' is possibly the greatest stage of all. Because you delude yourself, you say "I realise that we're all wearing masks, I watch you wearing masks ignorant of it, and I am outside of you!"
But lad, to be outside of something means that that something has to exist in the first place.
>>18008229
Are you saying that spontaneity is never authentic? I feel like I've misunderstood you.
I feel similar.
I suggest entering a field of work that doesn't require any management above you or other close work partners.
People can be cancer. I don't know how anyone is okay living like that. I would just kill myself.