Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1923. page

>>18215190
Focus on your new gf and cut contact with your ex, block her on social media and don't stalk her

>>18215203
> OP here

I don't wanna stalk her. Thanks for the advice. What do I do with the emotions when they do come? I'm a newb to this whole thing...

Dude.
>gets a new gf 2 weeks after break up
>ex gets new bf as well
>'WHYYYY NOTHIN WE DID WAS EVER SPECIAL WHAT A SLUT'
Are you fucking retarded? Get over yourself. You guys broke up, you got a new gf, she got a new bf. It's life. Deal with it.

How old are you and how many relationships with women have you been through?

20, 3 girls, all my age.

>>18215205
Alright, we're basically the same in that regard aside from a few years. I felt like i got in too deep with the first girl, but i kept myself emotionally distant with the 2nd two and made them feel like shit. So i dont really know what the fuck im doing either, but i do think that beating yourself up over a bitch is stupid. I can relate though, its a horrible feel.

>>18215174
>I am planning to get a new apartment in 6 months. Is it worth to spend time and energy to decorate the fuck out of my current one and make it extra comfy?

Why are you waiting so long to dump her? And why do you have a planned date?

>>18215186
More like is it worth mowing the lawn every day or just letting it grow and pretending i like it that way cuz fughtin all the t i me is the hard work. i can just nit give a shit

One of the few times I've flat out defied him was doing a study abroad program to china. It was around a time when things were tumultuous with N Korea, and he watches a lot of Fox News, so he just wasn't having it. Too dangerous, they're communists, if something were to happen, the air quality is horrible, etc., but I did end up going, loved it, and have ended up visiting like 3 more times since then.

Even in everyday conversations about politics or my schooling or miscellaneous topics, he just dominates a conversation and won't really concede that his point is not correct. He basically tells me that if I wanna goto grad school I need to do it as soon as I finish my undergrad, and I don't really wanna do that. My brothers and I have all had small business ideas we've pitched to him and he's seldom had any positive things to say about them, just kind of pokes holes in the idea, or rejects something if he doesn't know enough about it.

I feel like as a father he should be more supportive of what I want to do, and offer support and advice based on my plans, but instead he offers his own ideas of what my plans should be, but he often delivers them with sound logic. It's frustrating.

At this point desu I'm not even sure what I'm asking, just hoping someone may have had a similar experience and knows how to get my dad to kind of accept that I can make my own decisions based on what I want.

>>18215160
>he also has a tendency to reject taking into account things he's not familiar with.
Well, that's how most humans are.

>would it have been better for him to encourage me to go study film and try it out?
Ideally yes. Practically, no if he was to pay for it, and more important, if you don't care enough about it to take suggestions from others in consideration. Artsy shit is a do or die thing. If you're unsure, it's not your cup of tea.

>I really want to try to do.
Then do it? The point of advice is to offer you another perspective, not direct your actions.

>he's a pretty smart guy
>he watches a lot of Fox News
Err....

> the air quality is horrible
Well, it's true if we talk about cities.

>won't really concede that his point is not correct
Comes with the attitude that makes him take Fox News seriously.

>he's seldom had any positive things to say about them, just kind of pokes holes in the idea
Which is good advice. Running a business isn't easy and you can always overlook a ridiculously small detail that decides about success of it. If you notice that he doesn't know shit about the thing he's talking about, simply don't take advice regarding to THAT.

>I feel like as a father he should be more supportive of what I want to do
Ideally. In reality, it's unlikely that you can do something about the way he thinks now, nor should. Keep that things in mind with your own kids. For now, just take the useful bits of his advice and ignore the silly ones. It doesn't really matter whether he accepts your decisions or not. As long they are sound, you're good.

>someone may have had a similar experience
Well, unlike your dad, most of my family doesn't really know what they talk about, so most of their advice comes from hearsay. So you're better off than some.

Is finance really that great of a degree? I mean, what do you plan on being, a stock broker?

>>18215142
I've never been on speaking terms with an ex, I don't see how you can have had that and breakup and just talk and be friends

>>18215144
We're fucking not, this was out of the fucking blue after like a year, last time I spoke to her was a month ago asking for a jacket back.

She's dead to you. Leave the group without replying, it's not worth the hurt.

Zen mind beginners mind

The Santacittarama Monastery has a free online booklet on the subject, both in English and Italian

You should google it, I cannot post the link, 4chan filters think it's spam

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Iirc I read one called How to Sit Like the Buddha.

There's also this guide that gets posted around

>>18215059
>I've followed every god damn rule of society
Yeah, but what to YOU want to do? How do YOU want to live your life?

>>18215094
woah man don't break out the black pills quite yet. drop that knowledge gently

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>>18215059

Fuck societal standards. If you're happy with that, which you're obviously not, then you need something for yourself. Get a hobby. Something you love doing. Fuck a good paying job when it comes to happiness. Just find something you love to do and do it. It could be anything from collecting soda can tops to make art from to studying astronomy. Just find what you love. Don't rely on society to outline what success is. Find your own.

>>18215053
Change your perspective mr pathetic. Life is amazing. Your job will be the best thing that ever happened to you

>>18215098
Okay, senpai, but still I just can't shake the feeling that I'm going to be chained to something that isn't what I'd like.

>>18215053
What could motivate a man into being a slave for rich people? You want to die for Israel or something?

>>18215013
Take acid or mushrooms

>>18215013

self examination

>but how do i do that

you look at what you do, how relationships ended, you think about what went wrong, and you compare them to what other people said happen. if their account is wildly different, you split the difference

its a lifelong process, kinda like when people go to AA. you will always struggle. very little of what we change is permanently gone without thought

>>18215019
what if when I talk to the people i used to be close with they dont respond. Im not talking like i message them and they never read it, I walk up to them in person and they give me the silent treatment. Is there AA for losers?

>>18214986


what kind of medicine do you need?

obamacare basically exists for you to get really reduced insurance, however its hard to start it in the middle of the year without some 'life changing circumstance' like your old insuranceb eing cancelled for reasons outside of your control.

you could always go to a free clinic though I am not sure if they will prescribe. a lot of medicine is available online tho

>>18215020
Asthma medication. I'm on my last vial.

>>18215031

not sure. you can try googling it but that sounds less common than anti biotics. find out how much filling the prescription will cost, but if it saves your life or at least allows you to live comfortably until you can get health insurance, great.

You could hire a prostitute and just ask her to cuddle. Might work

I guess I was mistaken, it seems this is not a profession in the United States. What a shame

>>18214976

they do exist but its not exactly a luxury most can afford.

from what i gather its far easier to convince a normal girl to do it than it is to find someone offering it.

Chances are you're not going to be a great kisser but as long as you relax and don't try anything to fancy you'll at least be passable. Kissing comes pretty naturally to people.

Also overthinking it this much will definitely fuck up your kissing.

And don't act natural either. Remember, that shit hasn't exactly worked for last 26 year.

>>18214934

Everything else with her feels unbelievably natural. I feel no anxiety around her at all and we've only known eachother a month. I feel like she accepts me and doesn't judge me. Her and I get along so well, it's just laughing and smiling and mutual attraction the whole time we're together. She wants me to take the lead, it's obvious.

I won't overthink it too much. I'm just nervous because the biggest thing holding me back all these years has been anxiety over my lack of experience.

I had this in the past year at 25.

Except I had all wisdom teeth out at the same time and not only were they impacted but 2 of them were fucking cracked. I was fucked by my wisdom teeth and nervous as hell. I don't think I felt any real pain at all About the level my ankles feel right now after just coming back from running two miles.

If you have a good dental surgeon and dont fuck up the instructions (don't eat shit for a while, make sure you floss faggot) then you might have literally no pain.

If you eat your daily doritos the first day you're going to have a bad fucking time. Listen to the fucking surgeon. He knows how fucked you are/arent. At least a week for "normal" foods and I mean shit like noodles where it's still somewhat easy to swallow

>hair loss
You fucking what m8

>>18214944

Is oatmeal good after surgery or can the oats get between the gums and cause an infection?

Also yes, one of the common causes of hair loss is general anasthesia (which is what I'm getting) and major surgery (although this is considered minor I think)

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>>18214898
>Are my worries valid?

Nope. You'll sit down, be very nervous, then you'll be out. Next thing, you're at home sitting on the couch with bloody gauze in your mouth very confused. And it's not like you're getting brain surgery. You're getting two teeth removed. It's all standard routine that almost everyone goes through

>experiences, pain
my mouth was numb the first day. next day it kind of hurt. then it felt most sore on the third and fourth day. After that, the pain declines. Pain isn't too bad either. you just can't open your mouth too much and it just feels swollen. your cheeks will also swell a lot. Just eat soft food/ sleep and you'll be back to normal in about a week.

Just make sure you clean the sockets everyday after surgery or they'll get infected real quick

>hair loss
you'll go bald unfortunately

>>18214806
Nothing. She has boyfriend.

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>she has a bf

take a wild guess about the proper thing to do

>he thinks texting will get him anywhere
lmoa

>>18214818
>>18214821

I know, I know. But, she is the person that I am closest to outside my immediate family. I really don't want to lose my only real friend.

>>18214743

depends on if she was really worth it. at my age and with my resources, probably not.

>>18214743
Date? Sure, there's no harm in it. Actually plan on having a future with her though? That's a different story. She'd have to be pretty amazing and the father would have to be dead for me to consider that.

>>18214743
Not unless I was kept away and not expected to be a surrogate dad. I would honestly worry that she wouldn't be fun and sexy enough of she was weighed down with some other man's child. I'm only 24, so I don't think wanting a woman who's childless is asking too much just yet.