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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 360. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

hear that, boys? get on it
31 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>39477417
>no citation
fuck off degenerates
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>>39477473
>no citation
>never heard of the prestigious sexfactwtf journal
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>>39477473
They are called wtfsexFACTS so I'm pretty sure they would know

>At a store
>Find the thing I was looking for
>Walking up to checkout
>Only one register open
>Cute gril at register
>Too nervous to make small talk
>Put thing in a DVD bin
>Walk out without buying anything
I didn't think my life could be this bad
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>39477394
dont need to say anything you idiot.
even me, the aspie, knows that.
when cutie is at register:
>walk up
>"hi! anything else?"
>nothanku.gov
>"have a good day!"
>thanks, you too
>take my shit and leave
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>>39477394
el patito GORDO!
>>
>>39477531
aspie here to second this post

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trips leave r9k for 5 days

dubbs leave r9k for 3

if you get a set of 3 numbers that go in order you leave for a month (like 567)
46 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>39477367
Okay sunglasses man
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>>39477367
Please make me leave this gay board
>>
Will do Mr robot

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sup robots basicly just post where you live and what you guys usually wear

>wear board shorts, flip flops and a tshirt most days
13 posts and 3 images submitted.
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Pittsburgh. Shorts and a red hoodie
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>Iowa
>Hoodies and Shorts
>>
>flip flops
You need die, like right fucking now.

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Okay /r9k/ I need help
I recently got my learners permit to drive and I've been driving a bit but I'm way to nervous and tense
so I need some advice on what can I do to relax when I drive? I do okay till a car gets behind me then I start to tense up
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Have a couple beers first
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Crash to another car you will gain confidense. Kill the fear
>>
T-bone a car. Establish dominance. Cover your entire car with Hillary 2016 stickers.

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>phone vibrates
>ohmygodfinally
>my time has come
>think another human being has finally messaged me
>its just another system update alert for my phone
>mfw

any robots know the feel?
13 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Robots do not own phones, you normie.
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>>39477282
Not Op, but why?
I wanna play stupid tycoon games and watch cozy videos at work
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>>39477326
Having a phone makes you a normal person. For what purpose would a robot have a phone? We do nothave friends, we do not enjoy interacting with others, we use are computers for all media.

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WHY CANT I TALK TO PEOPLE

I JUST WANT SOME ATTENTION BUT IM AFRAID OF BEING MADE FUN OF FOR MY LACK OF EXPERIENCE WITH GIRLS

I AM 29 AND I STILL LIVE WITH MY MOM

I CANT MOVE OUT BECAUSE I DONT HAVE MONEY

IM GOING TO BE THE LITERAL 30 YEAR OLD VIRGIN LOSER REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

IM GOING TO DIE UNLOVED!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39477199
Lets talk OP.

How did you end up like this? Where are you? What have you been doing since you left high school? Did you even finish high school?
>>
>>39477199
>WHY CANT I TALK TO PEOPLE
Easy for you to say as you're probably not a stutter unlike me.
>>
Are cases such as these symptoms of something gone horribly wrong in modern society?

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>tfw no bf who says and does cute things
9 posts and 8 images submitted.
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>tfw no aliceposter gf
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>>39477233
>gf
I'm a boy anon, this is a boy board
s-sorry
>>
>tfw no gf/bf to say and do cute things with

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>first day of nofap
>already losing really fucking badly
I didn't cum though. So i'm still going.
Wish me luck
10 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>39477173
>it's been so long I lost track of what day I'm on
>mfw all these "IT'S TOO HARD" threads since yesterday
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>>39477791
One of these day's you're literally going to nut your pants.

And i want to expirience that too
>>
DAB ON THE HATERS XD

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>i wont respond to messages just saying 'hi, how are you? how was your weekend? your hot etc'

THEN HOW THE FUCK DO I INTRODUCE MYSELF
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
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Send her some inane rambling paragraph
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Come up with some reddit-tier quip based on her photos/bio. Yes, I know its terrible. This is why tinder is shit
>>
>>39477116
Hey

Ooorig

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>stretch marks
what drives fat women to do porn, r9k?
12 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>39477041
i have stretch marks on either side of my body just on top of my teres major.
have never been fat or used sterons.
i.e. some people are just unlucky, not necessarily fat
>>
>>39477041
>manlet OP doesn't know about stretch marks on skin from bones lengthening
>>
I have stretch marks and I've never been fat, I'm actually skin and bones tbqh.

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how do i make friends

i have no friends

i want somebody to give me a hug

...

no friends hugging thread
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>39477003
>how do i make friends
>i have no friends
>i want somebody to give me a hug
>...
>no friends hugging thread
All this is me too
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>>39477003
>>39477021
my friends all ditched me or distanced themselves except two once I quit playing this game with them called ffxiv.
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>>39477337
same but for me it was league of legends

>Be me, anxious 24 year old
>Walk with eyes pointing down all the time, noticibly sweat when talking to strangers and lower voice a lot
>Notice a new crossfit gym will open right in front of my house
>"Fuck it" have a rush and decide to sign in
>Room full of crossfit chads and staceys
>They are fucking nice with me, I can't speak though, feel like they're judging me
>Sign in and I'll start on Monday my first class

Now I'm regretting my choice just because of the thought that the class will be full with fucking adonises and they might judge me for being silent, skinny and weird.

Why am I like this?

What should I do on Monday?
13 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Go in there and get fit.
They really dont give a shit about you, theyre far too busy being insecure about themselves to notice your problems.

Just like you dont notice their problems cuz youre insecure af yourself.
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>>39476980
fucking true

>>39476918
ive been in your situation dude
just go to the place and try it out,

worst case scenario: you call them a few days later and tell them to cancel the membership

best case scenario, you get fit
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>>39476918
anyone who goes to a gym and judges others for being greater/lesser than themselves isn't someone with an opinion worth anything

you're literally there to better yourself, so focus only on yourself.

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> be me
> just graduated university, looking for a job
> one of my buddies tells me he knows a guy that has done a lot of recruiting for great companies
> im excited and i agree to meet him and i prepare a sales pitch for myself
> you know? trying to pretend im not a beta cuck
> finally today is the day of the meeting, i put on my best suit and practice my sales pitch one more time
> we arrive at his door, and we ring the doorbell
> he opens the door, and my friend introduces us
> i go to shake his hand
> our hands are 552 nanometers from meeting
> my friend says, "oh by the way, Steve charges a $500/h consulting fee"
> he continues, "non-refundable, minimum an hour starting from when you first shake hands"
> i laugh thinking it's a bad joke
> we talk for a few hours as im leaving, they try to stop me to give me an invoice
> i look at them and tell them im not paying
> next week i receive a letter saying im due in court for the money owed
> mfw
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39476860
This has to be some sort of joke.
>>
Post proof, you fucking fag.
>>
Not like you signed anything

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What's the evolutionary advantage for men wanting to become girls?
17 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Niggers become too infatuated with my big whiteboi butt while chad has 3 children.
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>feminism appears
>suddenly everyone wants to be a girl
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>>39476858
Because most of those people are transbians, they are just men, using feminine appearance to deceive lesbians.


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