Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5232. page

>>17199458
Lie. That's what they're doing.

>>17199458
Scars never heal, they only fade.

I'm in a similar situation, but it extends far beyond just boyfriends / girlfriends. I basically lived an entirely different life from all of my peers. I can't talk to anyone from high school without them mentioning names of kids who were known throughout the whole school who I never met or heard about. Everyone has favorite teachers, I don't remember any of them. Everyone talks about this summer trip or that party they went to. I spent my entire high school either:

>Getting bullied
or
>Hiding inside playing vidya

I have zero happy memories and relatively few memories at all. And it carries with you. In college you try to talk to someone interesting and they start prattling on about some sport they played or some community activity they were involved in and your heart sinks and you realize there's nothing interesting you can say about yourself. It will affect every relationship you will ever try to have and some nights it will hit you especially hard and you won't be able to get out of bed.

Time only marches forward. You can't "fix" your past. Once the rock is shattered, it will never be whole again. All you can do is wait and slowly the past hurts less and less.

>>17199458
>I wish I could have nice memories like that

This is going to sound sappy, but you need to be a kickass person now. And when you have attained some level of kickass (you never stop improving, grasshopper), you look back at all the shit that happened to you in live and you realize that you wouldn't be who you are without it, so you wouldn't change any of it.

Like, I doubt if you'd asked Chuck Colson about it he'd say he wished he hadn't gone to prison.

>>17199457
Send her a clever or pretty animated e-card

send her flowers

>>17199457
There are plenty of delivery or catering services. You can have flowers delivered to her, have a cake delivered, etc.

>>17199400
Try writing this again, in English.

>>17199480
It was in our shared language, but maybe you need simpler words. I'll see if https://xkcd.com/simplewriter/ can help me.

I feel like I'm sick because I have a need for a place where people talk together but don't know each other. Somewhere that I can be recognized from one day to the next so I can remember who people are and carry on conversations for more than one day, but where who I am is not tied to who I am when not on the computer. This way I can act how I wish or say what I want without my real life friends or job getting mad or without what people think I should act like in real life driving my words.

Where should one go to find a place where people talk like this? I've tried a few places but they were not good for me:

>4chan
The computer hate machine does an good job at never forgetting a single bad thing you do, even if you didn't really do it but they think you did. If you say one thing that someone thinks you said another thing even one time then for the rest of your life you can't say who you are without everyone acting like it's a problem. It's not fun when people are mean.

>gaia
This place has a lot of people who tell you what to do and say. I used to talk there when I was 13. I tried to go back not too long ago and wasn't allowed to talk for 3 days because I asked someone to explain to me what they said when I didn't understand.

>reddit
For starters, the way this place where people talk looks makes it less of a place to talk and more of a place to tell stories. You're forced to talk about a few things and can only talk to one person at a time. I also found them to be worse than 4chan about getting really mad. For some reason redditors think they have their own sand box and if someone new tries to join they quickly start to try and figure out if they like them. If they don't like you on the first day, you're out.

Simpler words are longer so I need to say more later.

>>17199499

>7cups
For real and not making things up, no one comes to this place to talk unless they're sad. You spend 8 hours trying to make people choose not to kill themselves and 0 hours having conversation where you share things and learn things with people like you.

>>17199379
What state? It's not really illegal to sleep in your car

Depends on the state. I know in some countries/states you're allowed to sleep in your car, but there are a lot of rules surrounding it,, e.g. Can't sleep near a primary school, denizens of the street can call the cops on you if they want, etc. You could try sleeping in a mall carpark (24hr carpark), they're usually pretty good.

>>17199386

it is however illegal to trespass on private property (which many parking lots are), and many cities will write you citations for doing it in residentials.

Here's a website that lists safe places for RV campers to park overnight

http://www.allstays.com/c/camping-overnight-rv-parking.htm

>>17199302
>she's pissed at me now.
How do you know this?

>>17199305
That's my guess from all of her "wow really? Okay... shame, seriously?" and her lack of response to my suggestions to meet up some other time

>>17199309
None of that indicates that she's pissed.

>>17199300
The pedophilia kind of red flag. You explain it by young girls being naive as shit and attracted to older men, and pedophiles being manipulative as shit. He's probably a rapist who is going to fuck her up and break her ability to have a normal relationship.

>>17199300
She wants to feel older and the 31 yr old is cool to her because of her lack of experience with adults.

He has a car, house, beard etc while she's surrounded by teens. Once she's an adult and sees how incredibly lame he most likely is the relationship will end. >>17199319
Calm the fuck down he just wants some prime teen pussy.

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>>17199300

Do you actually think this is going to be a way for you to get easy sex?

I have a friend that's been to these they say they're fun and the girls only go as far as they want usually not very far except for a few of them

Please anyone with experience share stories. This is incredibly interesting
>>17199325
Do those few just let anyone there fuck them?

>>17199270
It will feel really sad and disgusting when you cum. Not worth it IMO and this is talking from experience. You will also be anxious about STDs and paranoid about the police. You may not even get hard.

>>17199270
Assuming you get past >>17199275 you will also feel like you cheated the virginity game. You will have no proof to yourself that you are capable of meeting, dating, and fucking someone who is actually interested. Your confidence will be rekt.

I currently live in the uk and as far as i know escort services aren't iligal. Also i plan on using a condom. Im just scared that it might actually lower my confidence knowing how i lost it.

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Start buying/cooking the guys at work good food. Nothing improves your reputation better than when you buy/make people good meals

>>17199274
That's a tasty looking burger there!

Sadly, we're in a kitchen. I don't really have any intentions of being their friends. I'm thinking that I'm going to Have to treat everyone the same, but I wouldn't be fair to myself if I did. I've been nothing but nice. Imagine having someone help you out with singing heavy, or complimenting your work, then having someone say "that guy's taking shit shit you."

You wouldn't trust the guy or look at him the same right?

Of course, maybe people would see through it, but like a safety label, I MUST assume that people are stupid and fall for these sort things. They usually have in my experience.

I don't want to be a brain in a world of pinkys

>>17199274
Spelling errors, sorry. Re do

That's a tasty looking burger there!

Sadly, we're in a kitchen. I don't really have any intentions of being their friend. I'm thinking that I'm going to Have to treat everyone the same, but I wouldn't be fair to myself if I did. I've been nothing but nice. Imagine having someone help you out with something heavy, or complimenting your work, then having someone say "that guy's talking shit about you."

You wouldn't trust the guy or look at him the same right?

Of course, maybe people would see through it, but like a safety label, I MUST assume that people are stupid and fall for these sort things. They usually have in my experience.

I don't want to be a brain in a world of pinkys

She sounds like a dumb indecisive teenager not worth your time. Three months is fucking nothing, By the sounds of it you're already fucked, if she does traditional as you make it out to be you've got no chance.

Sounds like a lot of mental stress, with none of that puss pounding. My best advice would be to break up with her now and spend the money you were going to spend on her, on that one video game you know you're looking at.

Girls that aren't independent aren't worth your time.

>>17199295

I'm pounding her puss and I'm not spending money on her, should've mentioned that in the OP.

Thank you for your input.

I don't understand, why are you bothering with her? A serious relationship is never going to come from this, and you're basically wasting time you could be wasting on a girl who you could possibly have a future with.

I have the same problem, I don't think it really possible to overcome. I actually remember trying to find books, maybe even for children like "communation from scratch" or whatever. I mean I really need to be taught how to say Hello, what to say next, when to introduce yourself and so on. Man, what an embarrasing life I have.

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>>17199249

>How to overcome social awkwardness?

Anon sits alone at a computer, not participating in social contacting, wondering why he has such a hard time in social situations.

You're like a sky diver who is afraid of flying, sitting on the runway wondering why its so hard for him to learn how to sky dive.

Get off the fucking internet, now, and go talk to someone and keep fucking talking until you get good at it. You're doing this to yourself and its time to stop.

>>17199272
This advice is same thing like telling someone who has zero driving experience to get into SUV and hit the road right away.

posted on my homeboard with no responses in close to half an hour but im pretty sure im having a drawn out anxiety attack so it feels like its been literally hours and the few irl friends I have arent online on fagbook or aren't responding if anyone has anything no matter how small that they think could possibly help in any way it would be much appreciated

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Perhaps you should find some hobbies. Like cooking

Not sure what the problem you want advice on OP? You're saying therapy is boring and a waste of time? Yep that's pretty normal. It's rare to find a good therapist.

>>17199196
Just let her set the pace, you were definitely moving too fast.

You are moving way too fast. She feels like a whore

>>17199196
Ask her when she'll get her work schedule.

Tell her hanging with her is better than hanging with your bros. chicks like this stuff.

Do not leave it for several days without being in touch with her. Girls gage your interest by how soon you message them and how often.

>>17199163
Only a single exhibit? Why bother giving it a letter delineation?

As far as why, it has been the subject of heated psychological debate. It's referred to as the "Bystander effect"

The more people who witness the event, the less likely any one of them is to get involved. They usually think something like "no one else is getting involved, I shouldn't either". It's believed to be a survival instinct from my understanding.

The wiki article is a long read, but explains it well:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bystander_effect

>>17199451
I suspect it's a byproduct of growing up in a mass education setting where all children are expected to act roughly the same and you're a fag if you do anything different.

>>17199451
>It's believed to be a survival instinct from my understanding.
That's interesting, and seems to agree with my view: another big part of it is the fear of taking a hit as well. Easier to feel bad for a victim than to intervene and risk becoming one yourself. We're cowards. Humanity is fun.

I shared a hotel room with a guy and ended up groping him in my sleep so now i sleep on the floor on the comforter. Also a lot of hotels have cots they can wheel up to as a 3rd bed. Just ask the front desk

>>17199146

No rollaways here.

...you groped him in your sleep? Amazing. 4chan with the stories.

Homophobic