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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5233. page

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You have $50 and have 3 hours to kill yourself as painlessly as possible or you will be tortured to death. How do you go about it?
54 posts and 7 images submitted.
buy $50 of vodka and jump off a bridge
Fifty dollars of melatonin

Fifty dollars of honey and jump off a bridge

Fifty one dollars kisses and jump off a bridge

Possibilities are endless. Might as well just spend the fifty bucks on fifty one dollar hookers.
>buy $50 vodka
>Go on a shoplifting spree
>Get arrested
>Slap a cop for extended sentence
>Work in jail, leave jail a few years later with a few thousand dollars
>Get a plane ticket to a far away land
>Situation completely bipassed

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i have a qt waiting for me there but idk how to go about staying there long-term.
how about english teaching?
i may be autistic but i think i can point to pictures on a blackboard and then vocalize them to a class of gooklets.
how helpful would getting a relevant degree be?
25 posts and 1 images submitted.
You need a 4 year degree for most schools to consider hiring you, what kind of degree does not matter.

Getting a TESL certification will definitely help you both actually teach, and getting more jobs.
Face the truth: nobody's waiting for you. Especially a Thailand hooker.
>he thinks he has a qt waiting for him
Have you even met her IRL. Hookers love to hide their past and snag a beta. Enjoy kissing those lips that have sucked off countless middle-aged sex tourists.

thailandlets when will they learn?

t.farang who's been hear for a year.

I'm not gay but I would fuck Bailey Jay's tight ass all night long while sucking her feet until we both end up covered in cum and exhausted.

Let's have a trap thread to distract us from the feels of no gf
33 posts and 6 images submitted.
>I'm not gay I just want to fuck a cute boy in the ass
IRL traps or just Internet traps?
There's a huge difference my fellow anon
Trust me
Has she actually resorted to sleeping in someone's bathtub? Times have certainly been tough all around.

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Are there any girls who prefer small cocks as opposed to large ones?
62 posts and 3 images submitted.
Probably but it's likely a fetish / meme
Only when they are being raped i would imagine
define small and large

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can i have a fembot gf?
im really loving and kind and honest and not bad looking or fat or anything
tho maybe a little autistic
please respond!
24 posts and 7 images submitted.
If you're that great, why don't you get an ordinary gf, instead of a fembot with mental issues?
I don't believe you, you'll drop your fembot gf the second you get more confident.
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>instead of a fembot with mental issues?
because i also have issues and i dont think i could be with someone not like me
the only way that could happen is if my dead gf from 2 years ago comes back somehow

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>be a convicted felon
>become a multi-millionaire model
201 posts and 37 images submitted.
Let's be real that guy is an absolutely rare and beautiful human male specimen. Average men may as well have vegetables for faces they are so plain in comparison.

Dont h8 m8 just masturb8 and give it an 8/8 while I cruise in my v8 to w8 for me m8 who is about to gradu8 while I open the g8 to leave cuz i dun wan 2 b l8 for my d8
He looks like he has false teeth.

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>be an artsy faggot
>like philosophy
>write music
>kind of okay-ish looking
>play electric guitar

All women around these circles are lel polyamorous green haired problem glasses people with a complete lack of self observation. How do I get over this?
28 posts and 5 images submitted.
can't you just hang out with woment from outside of your 'artsy circle' then?
>be an "artsy" faggot
>Like "philosophy"
>Write "music"
typical egotist artcuck

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Insomnia is so poopy :(
21 posts and 3 images submitted.
I know how you feel skin. You can talk to me if you like
What happened to eyebrows
Reee roastie get out of my virgins club

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Good night dad, I'm out with the girls
56 posts and 5 images submitted.

Get back in your room, you harlot
As your father i'm only going to tell you once. Go upstairs and put my dress back in the shoebox under the floor panel.
not before giving me my succ job whore.

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This is the cold, hard truth. This is the harsh reality.
25 posts and 6 images submitted.
It's true. But they won't listen.
>10 years old

nice try you fucking jew.
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Tfw almost exclusively attracted to women over 25, preferably 30+

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Why do women act like slutshaming is the worst thing? Why aren't we allowed to judge them negatively for their sexual decisions, while they judge us in a million ways for our sexual decisions? Why can't we have standards or deal breakers, while they have a million
224 posts and 15 images submitted.
Because they too know being a slut is disgusting. Because women are children, they would rather have us modify what is seen as disgusting rather than modifying their own behaviour
Because you are not supposed to bother yourself with women's behaviours. It's take it or leave it.

Also the fact that whining is one of the most unattractive things a man can do.
roast or betacuck detectedlol

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Something just pulled the dog into the cum portal.
37 posts and 16 images submitted.
The scat fermentation discord gained a new user
>Mommy absorbed into the jizz wardrobe.
it was probably a cum chimera

better run OP

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>Pretend to have Autism for Neet bux
>Had to go to a few disability group things
>Meet ultra Autistic girl
>Convince her to be my girlfriend
>She never wants to have sex
>Tell her if she doesn't have sex she will burn in hell forever with her family
>She screams but lets me do it saying she doesn't wanna burn

Relationship has been solid for 4 years now, tism girls are so cute! I recorded her saying it when I got her to climb on. Enjoy guys.

59 posts and 14 images submitted.
I don't think I can enjoy this, anon.
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>Pretend to have Autism for Neet bux

you sure you're just pretending Anon?
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This is rape by definition dude holy shit!

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tfw little white dick in the age of BBC :(
42 posts and 13 images submitted.
Damn, I guess she's going to die a heart attack when she sees my two inch pincher.
To be fair, 4.7 inches IS really tiny
She says white dicks in general are too small

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>tfw your bf is 5'9"
38 posts and 11 images submitted.
hey bitch I'm 6'4" whats up?
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>tfw you're 6'2
Ay lil' mama, want a 6'2" man to take care of you? I'm right here for ya

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