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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5233. page

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You have $50 and have 3 hours to kill yourself as painlessly as possible or you will be tortured to death. How do you go about it?
54 posts and 7 images submitted.
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buy $50 of vodka and jump off a bridge
>>
Fifty dollars of melatonin

Fifty dollars of honey and jump off a bridge

Fifty one dollars kisses and jump off a bridge

Possibilities are endless. Might as well just spend the fifty bucks on fifty one dollar hookers.
>>
>buy $50 vodka
>Go on a shoplifting spree
>Get arrested
>Slap a cop for extended sentence
>Work in jail, leave jail a few years later with a few thousand dollars
>Get a plane ticket to a far away land
>Situation completely bipassed

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i have a qt waiting for me there but idk how to go about staying there long-term.
how about english teaching?
i may be autistic but i think i can point to pictures on a blackboard and then vocalize them to a class of gooklets.
how helpful would getting a relevant degree be?
25 posts and 1 images submitted.
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You need a 4 year degree for most schools to consider hiring you, what kind of degree does not matter.

Getting a TESL certification will definitely help you both actually teach, and getting more jobs.
>>
>>37280979
Face the truth: nobody's waiting for you. Especially a Thailand hooker.
>>
>>37280979
>he thinks he has a qt waiting for him
Have you even met her IRL. Hookers love to hide their past and snag a beta. Enjoy kissing those lips that have sucked off countless middle-aged sex tourists.

thailandlets when will they learn?

t.farang who's been hear for a year.

I'm not gay but I would fuck Bailey Jay's tight ass all night long while sucking her feet until we both end up covered in cum and exhausted.

Let's have a trap thread to distract us from the feels of no gf
33 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>I'm not gay I just want to fuck a cute boy in the ass
>>
>>37280639
IRL traps or just Internet traps?
There's a huge difference my fellow anon
Trust me
>>
>>37280639
Has she actually resorted to sleeping in someone's bathtub? Times have certainly been tough all around.

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Are there any girls who prefer small cocks as opposed to large ones?
62 posts and 3 images submitted.
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Probably but it's likely a fetish / meme
>>
Only when they are being raped i would imagine
>>
define small and large

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can i have a fembot gf?
im really loving and kind and honest and not bad looking or fat or anything
tho maybe a little autistic
please respond!
24 posts and 7 images submitted.
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If you're that great, why don't you get an ordinary gf, instead of a fembot with mental issues?
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I don't believe you, you'll drop your fembot gf the second you get more confident.
>>
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>>37280540
>instead of a fembot with mental issues?
because i also have issues and i dont think i could be with someone not like me
>>37280559
the only way that could happen is if my dead gf from 2 years ago comes back somehow

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>be a convicted felon
>become a multi-millionaire model
201 posts and 37 images submitted.
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Let's be real that guy is an absolutely rare and beautiful human male specimen. Average men may as well have vegetables for faces they are so plain in comparison.
>>
>>37280342

Dont h8 m8 just masturb8 and give it an 8/8 while I cruise in my v8 to w8 for me m8 who is about to gradu8 while I open the g8 to leave cuz i dun wan 2 b l8 for my d8
>>
>>37280367
He looks like he has false teeth.

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>be an artsy faggot
>like philosophy
>write music
>kind of okay-ish looking
>play electric guitar
>6'2

All women around these circles are lel polyamorous green haired problem glasses people with a complete lack of self observation. How do I get over this?
28 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>37280331
can't you just hang out with woment from outside of your 'artsy circle' then?
>>
>be an "artsy" faggot
>Like "philosophy"
>Write "music"
Kys
>>
>>37280331
typical egotist artcuck

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Insomnia is so poopy :(
21 posts and 3 images submitted.
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I know how you feel skin. You can talk to me if you like
>>
What happened to eyebrows
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Reee roastie get out of my virgins club

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Good night dad, I'm out with the girls
56 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>37279956

Get back in your room, you harlot
>>
As your father i'm only going to tell you once. Go upstairs and put my dress back in the shoebox under the floor panel.
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>>37279956
not before giving me my succ job whore.

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This is the cold, hard truth. This is the harsh reality.
25 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>37279954
It's true. But they won't listen.
>>
>10 years old

nice try you fucking jew.
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Tfw almost exclusively attracted to women over 25, preferably 30+

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Why do women act like slutshaming is the worst thing? Why aren't we allowed to judge them negatively for their sexual decisions, while they judge us in a million ways for our sexual decisions? Why can't we have standards or deal breakers, while they have a million
224 posts and 15 images submitted.
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Because they too know being a slut is disgusting. Because women are children, they would rather have us modify what is seen as disgusting rather than modifying their own behaviour
>>
Because you are not supposed to bother yourself with women's behaviours. It's take it or leave it.

Also the fact that whining is one of the most unattractive things a man can do.
>>
>>37280132
roast or betacuck detectedlol

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Something just pulled the dog into the cum portal.
37 posts and 16 images submitted.
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The scat fermentation discord gained a new user
T9Dd9
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>Mommy absorbed into the jizz wardrobe.
>>
it was probably a cum chimera

better run OP

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>Pretend to have Autism for Neet bux
>Had to go to a few disability group things
>Meet ultra Autistic girl
>Convince her to be my girlfriend
>She never wants to have sex
>Tell her if she doesn't have sex she will burn in hell forever with her family
>She screams but lets me do it saying she doesn't wanna burn

Relationship has been solid for 4 years now, tism girls are so cute! I recorded her saying it when I got her to climb on. Enjoy guys.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1f8i8zAtBzY
59 posts and 14 images submitted.
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>>37279616
I don't think I can enjoy this, anon.
>>
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>>37279616
>Pretend to have Autism for Neet bux

you sure you're just pretending Anon?
>>
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This is rape by definition dude holy shit!

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tfw little white dick in the age of BBC :(
42 posts and 13 images submitted.
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>>37279555
Damn, I guess she's going to die a heart attack when she sees my two inch pincher.
>>
To be fair, 4.7 inches IS really tiny
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>>37279611
She says white dicks in general are too small

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>tfw your bf is 5'9"
38 posts and 11 images submitted.
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hey bitch I'm 6'4" whats up?
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>tfw you're 6'2
>>
Ay lil' mama, want a 6'2" man to take care of you? I'm right here for ya


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