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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3057. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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>at whole foods
>need to buy something for my work potluck
>i have the face of a retard, but it is a coincidence
>bad combination of genes from my parents, i guess
>browsing for awhile, feeling good
>see a meat tray that my friends at work would love
>proceed to checkout
>qt behind me
>meat tray is my only item
>notice the bagger staring daggers at me as i slowly slide my ebt card
>he clearly has down syndrome
>walk to the end of the checklane, look at the bagger
>he doesn't even react
>wait for him to bag my single item
>notice qt looking at me
>curl up my left wrist and loudly say "I want it bagged"
>bagger slurs "sir one item doesn't need a bag"
>grab meat try with non-currled hand and hobble to the exit
>drop meat tray after a few steps and fall to the ground
>qt rushes to my side "are you ok?"
>"i am fine miss, it is just hard for me to hold on to this tray with one hand"
>bagger is fuming while the qt helps me to the bus
>mfw i am not even disabled and i steal his only advantage
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Good work. Baggers are the worst. I always complain about how they handle my bread.
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>>38198785
is this a story about u competing w a retard
>>
>>38199232
Not exactly. More of a story of grabbing low hanging fruit. I was dealt a bad card, with my face. I will take any advantage, as should you. Another example:
>taking driving test when i was 16
>old guy conducting the test moves his hand to his forehead as i drive through a stop sign
>he brushes my shoulder while doing this
>curl my left wrist and freak out, asking him why he touched me
>passed the test, heh

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Who was your childhood crush, /r9k/ ? Pic related was mine, I wanted so much to have a gf like her
12 posts and 6 images submitted.
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Claire Danes during her my so called life years
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>>38198776
Miley Cyrus before her weirdness. My childhood pal's sister would be watching Hannah Montana and I'd just get transfixed. Interestingly, once she put the blonde wig on, I was turned off. I love natural blondes but I think I hate wigs
>>
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>>38198776
And it's been one wild crazy ride ever since.

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Why the fuck are poor people allowed on public transit?
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38198775
they're the only people on public transit
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>>38198775
Why tf are rich people allowed, is the better question
>>
Desegregation

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Let's post cute girls (or boys, as long as they're cute)
Bonus points for real people
43 posts and 23 images submitted.
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More cute girls incoming
>>
>Tfw no cute gf
Kill me
>>
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>>38199689
Dont post my wife

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>tfw 5'6 manlet
>tfw i cant carry a nice pocket pistol because im a eurocuck

what can i do if someone wanna beat me up or somebody makes fun of me and steal my clothes?

>tfw i will never have a cool 22lr pocket pistol
39 posts and 9 images submitted.
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>>38198750
A .22 is a poor choice for a pocket gun
>>
>>38198750
>buying into the american "everyone is out to get me" meme
Seriously, how cucked are they when their main argument to having a gun is "what if a burlgar kicks my door in at midnight?"
Nigger, that rarely happens and most of the time your dumb ass ends up shooting a family member.
>>
>>38198858
I have a handgun because I like to go to the range and shoot and its much cheaper in the long run to own your own. I think it's dumb when people try to justify it with bullshit like that. I'm Canadian too by the way

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My wife and I want children. I can't think of a name I like. Can you think of any cool ones?
66 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Batman

original post is original
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>>38198679
Silver, Frost, Nicholas, etc.

Less common but still unique and acceptable names, as long as they aren't shit tier like Maximus or Alexander the 19th or some shit.
>>
Coogan is my name

please carry on the legacy

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>"only chads get girls"
>I regularly see ugly manlets with GFs
>I have spoken to fatfucks that have gotten more pussy then me
I'm starting to think the "only chads get girls" meme is an excuse to wallow in your own self pity
35 posts and 6 images submitted.
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I mean, that's cause it is. The reason most people on here can't get a gf isn't because they're manlets/ugly/poor/autistic/stupid, it's because they hate themselves for being what they are. This erodes a person's self-confidence and makes forming relationships difficult. I mean, that's how it is with me, might just be talking out of my ass tho.
>>
>not realising the entire culture of 4chan is a meme
>>
>>38198641
This should be in the fucking sticky.

Most people are here because they are ugly and bitter as fuck inside. Im not saying its not justified if you've been shit on your whole life, but most people can tell you're a shitty person relatively quickly and will avoid you like the plague.

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>Anon, honey, these jeans don't look too big on mommy do they?
29 posts and 16 images submitted.
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t-they look fine
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I ask her what's a woman like you doin' here
I see you're use to champagne but I'll buy you a beer
She said you've got me figured out but I'm not what I seem
And for a dance I'll tell you 'bout these tight fittin' jeans

She said I married money, I'm use to wearin' pearls
But I've always dreamed of bein' just a good ol' boys girl
So tonight I left those crystal candle lights to live a dream
And partner, there's a tiger in these tight fittin' jeans
>>
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>>38198548
>These panties don't make me look uncouth, do they? I trust you anon, you're mommy's special little guy

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o more; and the heart-ache and thus the pangs of troubles, and scorns of great pith and enterprises of thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir currents turn awry, and moment with this mortal coil, must give us pause. There's the name of action. To be, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and scorns of us all; and, by a sleep; no more; and, by a sleep; no more; and make with and sweat under a weary life; for in that patient merit of troubles, and the heart-ache and their to, 'tis a consummatio
30 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38198413
How are you not BANNED YET REEEEE!!!???
>>
>>38198413
Connie posting is the best. I have a lot of respect for what you're doing op.
>>
>>38198520
Why would one be banned when they've broken no rules?
>>38199064
Is that so? Huh. Well thank you, I guess.

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This notion that only chads get girls can only be accurate if you're talking about only sex or really short relationships. Even then, if you suppose something like that it's only the top 10% of men having sex with the top 50% of women, this implies those men are having sex an average of 5x as much as the women. When it comes to having relationships, it is generally a 1-to-1 pairing. That means roughly an equal number of womyns end up alone as guys. That means for every neet who can't get a girl out of his league, there is a girl who can get a guy out of her league. The only problem here is if beta neets refuse to get with past sloots. That means they have to compete with each other for a smaller number of pure, probably uglier-than-them womyn. But they wouldn't be competing with chads. Basically, the "I'm lonely because only chads get womyn," is a stupid meme and a stupid excuse. 5/10 betas who don't think this way get girls just fine. You have to be really stupid not to understand this.
93 posts and 19 images submitted.
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>>38198408
ok beta cuck, you can believe whatever you want if it makes you feel better.
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>>38198408
But I need a virgin. I literally will not be sane dating a slut.
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>>38198542
What's it like to be more insecure than 90 percent of the human population?

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>there are people on /r9k/ RIGHT NOW that think women aren't inferior to men in every way
17 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>38198376
Maybe that kind of thinking is the reason you are still a virgin loser robot.
>>
>>38198376
Even the most women hating man of all would have to agree that women outdo men at at least being soulless.
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>>38198376
Robots are inferior to everyone regardless of sex or species.

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"Perhaps he is wondering why he should even consider your application, before you've introduced yourself with a firm handshake..."
33 posts and 15 images submitted.
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>>38198346
Somehow a bad meme is giving us so much.
>>
I least I applied. Who are you?
>>
>>38199027
you people don't even deserve good memes

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my hairline is like pic releated

am i fucked

be honest
16 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>38198329

That's not bad. Just refrain from man bunning and you'll be fine.
>>
>>38198329
he might have that same hairline for the next 40 years
>>
>>38198329
Chop off that clump of ass hair in the back and you will do fine.

What's /r9k/ smoking on this fine day?
23 posts and 3 images submitted.
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camels son
and chewing stokers after coffee

how much do you smoke i smoke maybe 5 a day
next year i might try growing some tobacco
>>
>>38198363
I wish I could grow my own tobacco. It's fully illegal where I live.
>>
Smoking is eventually going to destroy your ability to taste anything, including the tobacco itself, but also your favorite foods, coffee, beers, anything. Especially bitter and umami flavors.

It's not worth it. If you need nicotine get some lozenges or a patch.

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>buy new 2000 dollars gamer PC motivated by No Man's Sky hype
>game is shit and a marketing scam
>all other games are shit just like 7 years ago when i sold my first gamer PC
>my attempt to fix burnout gaming syndrome failed
>year later i sold the PC again...at a value loss too
>blissful childhood NEET days lost forever
>depression kicks in
is it time to eat the bullet?
19 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38198296
Get a hobby like reading you fucking faggot.
>>
>>38198296
>game is shit and a marketing scam

everything is this after a while.
>>
>>38198296
>selling your pc
>at a loss
Why?

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