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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3063. page

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>been dating a roastie for 3 years, about to lose virginity tonight then dump her

I almost made it boi's. She fucked over 60 guys before me and she's 32 years old. To get this far I told her I loved her and I want to find someone to marry. She doesn't realize I'm a virgin and was making me wait till she trusted me before having sex. Because her biological clock is running out and she thinks I'm "the one". Dumping this toastie roastie as soon as I get laid
27 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>38196758
>it takes 3 years of dating before you can fuck used goods

wew lad
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>>38196820
Why do you think I'm dumping her? This is the worst part about roasties. Not only are they whores, but they're whores for chad but prudes for robots. You have to spend lots of money & years on your life to get the same thing that chad got on his first date. Why the fuck would I marry someone who treats me like that? I don't why I can't get laid without jumping through these hoops, how do people have casual sex or sex early in a relationship?
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>wasting 3 years of your life with some loose slag just for some nasty sloppy 60ths and possibly an STD
woah op you're such a devilish cool sociopath

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>been posting on websites and image boards since I was 12
>remember being the annoying 14 year old that everyone hated
8 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>he wasnt a lurker during his underage years
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>>38196674

Some people never change OP, your fate has been sealed, you will forever be known as the annoying little faggot who thinks that he is being clever and original by reposing old threads covered in outdated memes to get a few anons to ratify his existence.
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>>38196700
>>38196704
I never posted here underage. I posted on Ebaumsworld but I don't think they had an age limit

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>Mother says I'm handsome
Should I believe her?
17 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38196537
if she think you're soo handsome maybe you should get her to prove it by fucking you.
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trust nobody OP, not even yourself
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>>38196537
Yes.You're a handsome boy.

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Help Robots, I have to live with my ex for at least a month, what do?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38196513

Find a new lover.
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>>38196513
how come? why? what reason?
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>>38196513
>I have to live with my ex
>what do
It can't be helped, you must kill yourself.

>tfw your gf starts stalking you like a predator for sex and you just tryna chill
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38196487
I know this is bait but it made me hard.
>tfw no yandere dominant stalker gf
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>tfw never imagined myself disliking sex

Honestly not even that bad, just boring and I'd rather play video games.
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>>38196521

shes not really yandere, its more like she gives me a look that says "you better come fuck me or I'm gonna fuck you" followed by grabbing my dick and wrestling until I fuck her tired.

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How do I initiate sex?
as a shy femanon
34 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>38196363
stop LARPing faggot t
>>
Grab him by the balls.
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>>38196363
>watch movie/anime together
>get close
>cuddle
>touch
>kiss
>sex

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so plug died a while ago and was remade.

the r9k room is back in action, come chill, play tunes, shitpost. whatever

https://plug.dj/r9k
7 posts and 4 images submitted.
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gonna keep this thread alive as long as i can be bothered.
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i actually used to have a couple pics of the last moments of the old r9k room
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honestly the bros i made there kept me sane

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Why do black women x white men marriages have the best success rate while the opposite has the worst?
22 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Anecdotally, the only BWWM couple I know of actually got divorced then remarried each other. They're pretty religious, though.
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>>38196280
Yeah, southern blacks are religious af.
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>>38196247
Because black women are desperate and men who date black women are also desperate

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Moving to the Philippines with my GF (male)


See you later losers
20 posts and 4 images submitted.
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are white women really that bad?
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Sounds awesome good luck bro!!!
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>>38196210
is that a trick question? they are impulsive creatures that act on their own desires almost instantaneously, feel bad afterwards and loop right back around.

>Tfw jock itch

You robots don't understand this hell
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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How does that even happen? Rid you rub your legs against a public restroom?
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>>38196154
I do OP. I also know to get rid of it.
>get Daiper Rash Ointment from a store
>for 2-3 times a day, rub the ointment around your crotch(make sure its not your dick since you get bumps from that)
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>>38196580

I've just been using generic antifungal cream

Still itches like crazy by the end of the day

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> be me
> 6' 4"
> 145 lbs

Am I a skeleton?

General skeleton thread.
27 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>38196143
Can you afford food ,my son?
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>>38196143
Yes, that would be correct.
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>>38196160
I am living with my parents and they cook at least once a day.

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>tfw too poor to buy cool clothes
>tfw i just wear old adidas tracksuits and ugly t shirts
feels so bad i will die alone, im a 19yo kv
10 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38196140
"It's called 'work,' champ."
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Tb h I just wear plain t shirts most of the time.
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if you can buy things from the internet, try aliexpress, the clothing there is very cheap and fashionable. no debit card? buy a prepaid visa gift card from the grocery store for $20 and use that. i got three nice shirts for 2-3 dollars each with shipping. you will need to know your measurements in centimeters, though.

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Can you imagine a life as a teenager in 50's america
>be christian
>be cut (tightly, and without anesthesia of course)
>get beaten as a child
>get raised by a generation who believed in behaviorist methods, which means that your parents believed that hugging you fucks you up
>everything you eat is full of DDT
>everything else is full of lead
>only post WW2 industrial food available, so you live on one of the shittiest and unhealthiest diets in human history
>your teeth are fucked for life if you neglect them when you're young
>your dad is/was in Korea and comes back with PTSD
>you get drafted into the military in your late 20's to fight a different kind of gooks in a different shithole
>come back with PTSD and maybe as a cripple
>hippies hate you and spit on you
>by the way, PTSD didn't exist back then, so people just say you should man up or maybe lobotomize
>born to early to take part in the summer of love, but get to see all those young people fucking each other and taking drugs and enjoying the freedoms that you never had
>get hanged if you're black
>get shot if you are gay
>get beaten up if you have long hair
>get beaten up and bullied really bad when are a robot in school since the teachers and parents just didn't gave fuck back then and nobody cared for the weak kids (yes I know, but it was even worse back then)
>get 20 years in prison for a bag of weed
>constant thread of an atomic war
28 posts and 5 images submitted.
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we have it so good

Now I'll just go and have all this sex that is available to me...oh wait
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>>38196134
>get beaten up and bullied really bad when are a robot in school since the teachers and parents just didn't gave fuck back then and nobody cared for the weak kids

This probably would have fixed me.

Our current society is far too permissive.
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>>38196134
et's bump this.

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>order pic related yesterday
>gonna recieve it on monday which is my birthday
>haven't fapped in a week now
>going to have the intense cummies on my birthday

this is the only reason you should do nofap
41 posts and 10 images submitted.
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Are you going to open it in front of your whole family?
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>fell for the fleshlight meme
>not a superior onahole
Laffo at your life
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>>38196124
Is this good? Seems like a cheap fleshlight clone

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>tfw no big juicy vag gf
16 posts and 10 images submitted.
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goddamn that is fucking disgusting
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>>38196005
are you original homosexual?
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>>38196049
nah i just like dicks, and pussy is nasty


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