>go to female friends house
>want to show her Kingdom of Heaven
>favorite movie
>movie starts
>she gets up after 5 minutes and starts making food
>yourmissingthegoodparts.vlc
>finally sits back down
>she starts running her fucking mouth
>please be quiet and watch the motion picture
>she starts laughing and making fun of the movie
>starts hitting me with pillows and giggling
>"I'll take your jaw off, cunt" I say
>she thinks I'm joking
>keeps hitting me with pillows during the scene at Kerak
>this is an important scene
>I just want to watch the movie
>"do you want a massage?"
>no I just want to watch the movie
>she doesn't appreciate the details
>keeps asking who everyone is
>fucking pay attention and you might know bitch
>she says she's going to bed and looks me in the eyes and smiles
>"so are you gonna sleep on the couch or...."
>tell her I want to finish the movie
>she goes to bed
>I finish the movie
>fall asleep on her couch
The text she sent me the next morning in the comments....
>>34049871
>you didn't even finish the movie tho
Women don't appreciate anything. It's literally my favorite movie and she laughed at it.
I thought she would be blown away but every single detail was wasted on her.
Why the fuck aren't you using Tinder to get laid right now?
>>34049849
>He uses Normiebook
original as fuck
Dont have room on my phone for the app.
>>34049892
Get an iPhone you poorfag
Would you date a fembot who doesn't know how to put on makeup?
>>34049826
fembots don't exist, so this is a trick question.
also fuck off
why would I want you to wear makeup?
when I lick your face it's just going to get makeup on my tongue.
>>34049826
Good question. A few days ago a new girl was hired by the company I work for. Kind of cute at a certain angle and with a decent body, but mostly ugly due to just weird face, and she was not wearing any make up at all.
Got me thinking how easily she could have gone from 3 to 7 and fooled everyone with a little eyeliner and what not. It's actually kind of admirable, I respect the honesty.
But date her? No.
>tfw I found out the girl I recently started dating has an extensive collection of dildos and Hitachi vibrators
Have any of you ever been cucked by sex toys before?
Doesn't that simply mean that she has a high sex drive and she'll fuck you more often if you give her the chance?
>>34049803
ask her how many orgasms she gets from them
then ask her to record them
>>34049803
>girl I recently started dating
>collection of dildos and Hitachi vibrators
>complaining
Your worse than Chad. You don't deserve a girlfriend. I hope she leaves you for a nigger.
Consuming cannabis in moderation would make a lot of your lives a lot better
>>34049796
I know, but I'm broke
I know but it's illegal and tiresome to obtain.
I'm at the point where I'm not sure if I enjoy cannabis anymore. I do it only a few times a week but it tends to get very stressful but I continue to want to do it. Not sure why. I think this is the fast track to mental problems.
Well, I'll start by saying that I was not always the biggest in my village. Formerly the biggest was Chico of the stable. He was the greatest, and he had everything to be the greatest, because first he worked in the wrapping, so soon he had a dream job. Then all the things he had: It was a guy who smelled a lot of manure, he was burping too loud, it was not worth riding with ribbons, he was a shor doctor. Then he was a man who got very well drunk, his father was drunk, so he was one of those boys who are born with the tail to the moon and who are ready to have their whole life.
> So how did you become the biggest in your village anon?
Good question, let's go then.
To be me
> To organize the feast of our village in honor of our lady of the remedies
> The time comes
> Long or rocket
> The rocket stays in the hand, pumba, it was the arm pro galheiro
> And the boy "atao you did not unplug the rocket my beast? You should have detached"
> "For it is oh albertino, you are a beast"
> And I "I'm a beast, is it to unravel the rocket? I gave 20 euros for each rocket and I could not get them to land, I do not know where, Who is the beast now? "
> "Eh pa really you are that you are a beast oh boy of the straitjacket"
No more of that mariquice of unraveling the rockets at the party, from then on everyone would break out the rockets as I will. Both the handle and the handle, as the handle, as the handle itself and the flap that besides rockets burst rabear tail and went in the middle of it to see if it broke well pumba of the knee down finished the victor
(1/3)
Where are you from?
original originality
One day, I'm going on the street.
I see the boy coming towards me.
> Every buck as I say I'm going to give you a shove I'll turn you
>Is it? So I'm not going to turn aside, let's find a find to see who gets worse.
>I stayed the same
>he was all crippled
> "You saw my fool, did you see who is the strongest?"
> "It's okay, but I was going to walk and you drive"
> "Apologies"
(2/3)
>>34049768
ok, what the fuck am i reading? its obvious you rent english, but what do you mean by "the biggest"? who the fuck is the "lady of the rememdies"? what does "long or rocket mean?
this is so fucking autistic, i cant tell what the fuck is going on. what the fuck?
what the fuck does this mean- as the handle itself and the flap that besides rockets burst rabear tail and went in the middle of it to see if it broke"? im lost for words. you truly have reaching levels of autism that shouldnt be possible.
Just saw a marine recruiter today, took a little pre asvap test thing. shot the shit with him for a little and throughout the conversation we talked about my interest in the computer field of things.
So I told him about how many hours a week I use my desktop and he asked me if I >browsed 4chan.
I said yeah but lurking mostly for several years.
>he starts talking about "dank memes" and "spicy pepe's".
what the fuck is going on???????????????????????????????????
>>34049736
He's checking for mental illnesses.
Don't act too interested
>>34049736
Marine recruiters are shit. They are lying to you in order to fill their quota.
t. Marine
Join the Coast Guard instead OP
What do you think, guys?
Will you ever find the love of your life?
>>34049678
noorigio
>>34049678
I already havevideo games
>>34049678
Will I find someone that I love? Yes.
Will I find someone that loves me? No.
>18
>finishing up HS
>depressed
>mentally and physically tired all the time
>quiet person
>stopped talking to mom as much
>eating dinner
>brother trying to talk to me
>"Wanna go to church with me tomorrow?"
>he's hardcore christian
>"n-nah i'm fine thanks for the offer"
>mom interrupts
>"He doesn't care. He doesn't care about you, me, or the family."
I love my family, but my mom always makes my problems into her's, and it makes me feel worse than I already do. What do?
>"He doesn't care. He doesn't care about you, me, or the family."
your mom sounds like bit of a cunt.
>>34049620
I love her, but she's an asshole. She took my doorknob off.
>>34049667
>She took my doorknob off.
time to get a job and move out.
Stop being INTP/INFP.
>>34049567
i wish ;_;
>tfw you will never be entp, intj, or entj
>>34049567
INTJ here, meow
>infp
feels originally bad
>24 year old kv
>15 year old brother brought his gf over and i heard them fucking
i feel great right now
>>34049536
That's got to be depressing.
At least my brother is pretty robotic too.
>>34049536
I got banned for talking about her once. Better watch yourself, anonpai.
>>34049694
How many times did you get banned beforehand?
ITT we post things we fantasize about
>Fantasize about having friends and making them all laugh using our secret in jokes that only we would understand
>Fantasize about being so intelligent that i embarrass stacies when they try to debate me to the point they becomes sexually attracted to me
>Fantasize about being an intelligent chad, fucking hot female scientists with phat assess and big tits while helping advance human knowledge.
>Fantasize about going to sleep and never waking up
>Fantasize about being content as an adult
>Think for a bit
>Come to the conclusion that the only way I can be happy is by going back in time with my current knowledge/skillsets and changing the present
>Realize this will never happen
>Fantasize about just saying "fuck it" and smoking some pot
>Say "fuck it" and smoke some pot
Every time.
>>34049479
>Fantasize about being 6'2'' with a proportion body and nice facial hair.
That's it.
>Fantasize about seeing a therapist
I do it every night before I go to sleep.
anyone wanna help a fellow bot out?
been waiting on my psycho-bux for a full year now and havent been able to pay for my shitty $10/month internet
if theres anything within my ability I can offer just ask I can draw kinda alright and also write shit
[email protected] is my paypal
>>34049454
I will pay your cable bill if you post a picture of yourself stuffing your entire fist in your mouth
don't forget to time stamp it
>>34049486
ill try gimme a sec
can I censor out my face in case its just a prank bro?
>>34049904
Oh god, that's fucking hilarious for some reason
Do this test and post your results
http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv
>>34049383
>Have you had recurrent thoughts of suicide?
>If you answered yes to the previous question, do you tend to have these suicidal thoughts during and after a break-up with someone?
Fuck you, I have never even been in a relationship, REEEEEEEEE
Fuck this and fuck my feelings of emptyness
I'm really not surprised by any of this
I haven't been here in about a year and jesus has this place gone to absolute shit.
Remember when r9k was a woman hating, edgy, mentally ill board with genuine psychos? Now its full of angsty beta teenagers.
Angsty beta here.
Shoo shoo Norman
>>34049381
/r9k/ has been the same for years you fucking faggot
And trannies
Don't forget the trannies