Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 10182. page

>have two dogs
>say "who are my good dogs"
>never tell them who
>it's them

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>therapist asks if i was molested
>tell him i wasn't
>i was

>>34659989
>order medium meal from MacDees
>say large meal
>say medium meal
>say large meal
>say cancel
>order 30 large fries
>say cancel
>they hang up
wagie does this to himself

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>>34659910
Me, I developed oneitis really bad for this girl last November after dodging it since freshman year of high school. She's painfully qt but I know she has a boyfriend and they seem pretty close. Every time I see them together I want to fucking die. I'll probably drink myself into a stupor come valentine's day.

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nah.. im okay

>>34659910
Make sure to check her instagram on valentine's day, OP

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>>34659860
Yeah. Rum's good too.

>>34659889
What are you drinking for, fellow anon?

No. Alcohol gives you mouth cancer. Even listerine does it.

>>34659827
>he has the virgin walk
Everyone can tell

>he has the virgin ear wiggle

embarassing

>>34659827
No.
I told someone once and they didn't believe me.

Sure. That will be $5 + tip.

>>34659814
Whoops! Accidentally slipped and put my penis in your anus heheh.

>>34659814
>what?!?
>I'm just making sure your anus doesn't get cancer

>>34659791

find another guy, you don't owe anything to him to be loyal. there's no relationship pedestal.

he found another girl, don't commit yourself to him.

>>34659828

I was always loyal to him. Did everything and beyond to make him happy. Guess ill have to just move on with my life. He messages me accusing me of doing things I have no way of doing right when im about to get over him. Its killing my insides.

>>34659791
I'm in the same boat. Long story short the way i'm dealing with it is just accepting it and trying to better myself as a person so I don't put myself into the same situation next time. Try to go out more, meet people, anything really.

As for getting over him... I don't really have much advice. It's a horrible feeling that just sits in your gut. You'll meet someone and forget all about it, but in the meantime just try to stay busy and keep your mind off of it

Stop thinking about dicks anon

It is a sign of virility and excites the female mind. Practicalities do not enter into the equation.

Because its a normie meme

Blue Album is better desu desu

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>down on my knees
>beggin you please

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>Monday night I'm making Jen
>Tuesday night I'm making Gwen
>Wednsday night I'm making Jasmine
>Robot album
Shove a keyblade up your asshole you fucking faggot

make sure to be as rough and aggressive as possible

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>>34659668
NORMIES GET OUT (ORIGINALY) REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Reply with 1 words 2 max. you're worshipping her too much. Try to book a second date 1 hour after hers. If hers suck fuck another pussy, if it doesn't cancel on the second and it leaves second wanting you more.

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>>34659664
>uncovered webcam

>>34659721
Why would I need to cover my webcam if I can just close the doors to my cupboard?

What's up with the shoe?

>>34659660
Well
(You) first.

>>34659677
when i was a kid i wet myself a lot because i was afraid to go the toilet

how's that

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>>34659719
I used to hold my shit in for days at a time. My record was nearly a week and it felt like getting torn apart. My mommy insisted on wiping my ass for me to make sure it was squeaky clean. She'd even squeeze her index finger in and wiggle it inside to make sure my colon was spotless. She stopped when I was 14. I literally never had a chance in this life.

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>>34659637
Glorious.
Glorious!

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKaPpi7yxGY

It's going to happen.

>>34659637
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWj7Q9EPD04

wtf :(

>>34659575
Source for christ sake

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You imagine she's your mother and is scolding you.

You are also into femdom and older women.

Good ol lady Horan

here's hoping she comes back after she's legal

>>34659570
This made me audibly laugh

ravioli ravioli im dying alone-y

>>34659570
Girl cocks.. Boiclits its to much anon

>>34659570
You people are fucking degenerates

Serves you right dirty wetback

>>34659559

See it the other way, OP.

Instead of getting angry at people telling you everything is your fault including your circumstances and the place where you're born, you tried their advice of "JUST doing something about it".

Of course, they didn't tell you that it isn't what they did at all. This belief is one of the thing necessary to hold society in place. If society didn't give people any chance to escape their fate, they would get really angry.

So your country gave you a chance (to leave it), and the country welcoming you gave you a chance too. Now we'll all pretend it's still your fault and you should JUST do something about it.

> On a side note, this pic should be replaced with robots and the guy complaining about his universal income
> This is 2018 after all, dammit

>>34659559
I honestly wonder what construction would look like with 0 Hispanics.