Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5090. page

>>17248899
Cut your eyes out, you'll never be attracted to a girl you can't see.

Be the person that you want to be.
It's that simple. Say no to yes, even if you regret it.

Drop her and go chase some ass if that's what you really want. You sound like you're not the least bit sexually attracted to this girl and you just admitted that if given the chance you'd fuck someone else. The cruelest thing you could do is lead her on and continue to use her as an emotional tampon while thinking about other women on the side.

Break up with her and find someone who your standards.

Suicide

>>17248829
You have a moon pie face. Dunno if hair can help, loose weight.

>>17248829
Hitler youth

>>17248821
That's not shyness. It's mental illness. She has some serious fucked up trauma in her past to make her not want to be touched. Or she has autism. But the former is more likely.

You should communicate what you said here, to her. See what she says. If she doesn't make immediate changes, dump her. You don't need that level of fucked up.

>>17248827
Thanks man, she's defos doesn't have autism cause she plays in a band, works with people and is really sociable. I figure I don't have much to lose anymore so I'll ask her why she's so distant.

>>17248857
You guys might need to just talk it out. She might be uncomfortable because she doesnt know how far you'll take things, or that youll rush her

So, I did fuck them out of money and I'm ruining myself and now I feel like it's too late to change anything. I feel ungrateful. I haven't smoked anything in 3 days and besides the guilt and shame, I have no desire to smoke. I really don't. I did not eat over the past 2 days (I did today)

Now, I've fallen out of religion but felt I was at the end of my spiritual rope. I even went to confession at my church yesterday because I felt so bad. One thing the priest told me was that I stop the "nonsense" (weed) and get back on the weight loss plan and to take things one day at a time.

THAT is one of my problems. I look so far ahead and worry about the future or things that have not even happened yet and I don't worry about the present.

So, yeah. I'm not sure if anyone else can relate to this stuff but at my age out of college and the opportunities I've had, I can't blame anyone but myself. I was selfish and privileged and narcissistic about what felt good FOR ME.

2/2

Do something about it nigger

>>17248786

In my mind it's too late.

I'm on a somewhat similar boat. You are older so you don't know if they aren't gonna fuck up like you or worse when they reach your current age. It's normal that their hopes and expectiations are high at this time of their lives. You are older and in some aspects probably wiser. You can still help them out sharing your life experience. And it's never too late to change and make your life better, the fact that you met these cool people is probably a sign of things starting to get better in general. Not saying there won't be downs though but at least it's a great start.

>>17248735
>You are older so you don't know if they aren't gonna fuck up like you or worse when they reach your current age

They're just about to give their finals, I'm 25 and I dropped out of hs and I have no real work experience.

I can't teach them anything, I think it's more likely I should try to learn something from them.

>>17248747
Well that's not a bad thing, I'm learning a lot from my friends who are mostly 4 years younger than me. As long as you feel you are a good person and try to improve yourself a bit you should feel better. It also helps to do some charity work and help people in need, it boosts your self esteem.

>>17248720

>Are variable interest loans worth getting or are they generally very unstable?

Depends on what they variate against.

>>17248724
Looking at the one I'm leaning towards (Wells Fargo):

>This loan has a variable interest rate that is based on a publicly available index, the Prime Rate. Your rate will be calculated each month by adding a margin between .24% and 6.24% to the Prime Rate. The Index (which is the Prime Rate) is subject to a contractual minimum of %. The rate will not increase more than once a month and will never exceed % (the maximum allowable for this loan).

>>17248730

>Your rate will be calculated each month by adding a margin between .24% and 6.24% to the Prime Rate.

Great, now what are they basing the .24% vs 6.24% on? I realize you probably don't have the answer, but that would be my next question.

This chart gives you a good idea of what you can expect:

http://www.moneycafe.com/personal-finance/prime-rate/

...within 6% until we figure out waht they base it on.

>>17248701
>8/10

Highly doubt it.

>8/10

Highly doubt it.

>8/10
I very much doubt it.

Even if you're right about something just don't be a dick about it. Be understanding of why they would have that opinion and rather than just say "obviously this way is the right one" explain the reasoning that got you to your perspective. No one is right all the time. Everyone has been 100% sure of something that was not true, so don't express yourself as if you never have.

>>17248625
bump

>>17248625
Stop thinking you're superior or your opinion is superior to others. That's a start.

Google it Ahmed. Just like a dirty muslim to think they are entitled to everyone else solving their problems. Look up the fucking legal process in your area.

What country are you in?

>>17248616
It didn't seem to inhibit Barack Obama much.

>>17248581
>I fucked up /adv/.
As long as you're aware.

>I got caught speeding and the officer who pulled me over searched the car because he smelled weed.
Normally I'd gloss over speeding. But why are you speeding if your car smells like weed, when you know specifically that is drawing police attention towards yourself? This isn't fucked up, this is fucking retarded.

>He found the bag and gave me an appearance ticket. He told me to just plead guilty and pay the 100 dollars which I'm inclined to want to do but then that's on record forever.
Unless you're rich enough for it to not matter anyway whatever pittance of a 'defense' you might come up with will look worse. Do it and use it to learn something for once in your life.

>I also have to deal with this speeding ticket, which is my second one.
You're a clever one aren't you.

>Can I take another defensive driving course to get rid of the points on my license?
You have bigger problems, but I don't know the answer to this one.

>I'm 21 but still on my parents' insurance so I don't want them finding out about this.
I had to go get a drink and collect myself after that fit of cringing and laughing. They will find out if they don't already know. You're too late.

>>17248602
Follow-up: Can I tell my parents about the speeding ticket and deal with that entirely separately from the weed charge? I was issued separate tickets

>>17248581
>>17248602
>Is there anyway I can get a free lawyer and make this as pain free as possible?
The closest you're getting is what I'm giving you now.

>I'm fine to pay whatever money or do whatever community service, my biggest priority is keeping my parents out of the loop on both charges and to not fuck up my insurance.
If that was actually your priority you wouldn't have been speeding with drugs in your car while already having one driving offense and not being on your own insurance. Your priority is getting away with being stupid and not learning from past mistakes, and I refuse to help that.

>I'm in New York State and the charge was "Unlawful Possession of Marihuana" (with like a gram or two)
Good job, you're at least getting the babby's first idiot mistake of criminal offences.

>and then a speeding ticket for going 71 in a 55 which the officer reduced to 61 in a 55.
This is probably going to be a sore point coming from a Massachusetts driver of all people, but you have nobody to blame but yourself going 16 over with weed in the fucking car. The fact that you're getting off as easy as you are AND getting the cop being nice enough to cut you a deal and give you the closest thing I imagine you've ever had to sensible advice before I got to you should be enough to make you think about how maybe owning up to this is the only non-retarded option you have.

I know this is some fucking rude shit I'm saying but holy fuck do you need it if you're ever going to use the brain you've obviously never been taught you have in that fucking head of yours.

>>17248451
non-rich people? you don't get rich without working either hard or smart. if you're not capable of doing either you end up a normie.

>>17248467
Your opportunities to work hard or smart are entirely dependent on the capital your family has accrued. The system is stacked against you.

>>17248467
>you don't get rich without working either hard or smart
Being born is neither hard nor smart work, and a lot more of them get it that way than they'd rather admit to you.

>>17248451
Ditch drama, keep a small group of close friends instead of a sprawling hellhole of backstabbing acquaintances, fuck social media, stop watching hours of TV each day and only come here when you're able to do something more productive at the same time.

Find a job you either enjoy or can do something enjoyable while working. Remember that you don't actually need a fancy car or a huge house or those nine million boxes of random knick knacks to be happy, and be utilitarian where you can.

This frees up a shitload of time other people spend just kind of decomposing and it makes your life a thousand times more rewarding.

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The Gorilla Mindset by Mike Cernovic is good.
it's very macho and the dude seems like a total self centered asshole most of the time and I couldn't care less about his past which he describes in detail in some parts of the book but some of the advice he gives is actually really great. And it's not that long either.

>>17248464
Free Will by Sam Harris
The Motivation Hacker
How to Win at College
Confessions of a Recruiting Director: The Insider’s Guide to Landing Your First Job
So Good They Can’t Ignore You
How to be Remarkable
The Personal MBA
Your Money: The Missing Manual
The 4-Hour Work Week
Personal Investing: The Missing Manual
Brain Rules
Confessions of a Public Speaker
Worldly Wisdom: Collected Quotations and Aphorisms
Eat That Frog

>>17248432

The Diamond Age by Neal Stephenson.

>>17248464
>>17248498

Can you guys give examples of why any of those are worth reading, as compared to the standard self-help book which basically says "Do shit."

For the finance books listed, as opposed to "Rich Dad, Poor Dad", which can literally be summarized as "Invest your money instead of wasting it."

>>17248429
this is identical to what happened between me and my ex girlfriend

I don't know if it's you, but I forgive you.
There was also my fault and I had my flaws, if it's you, then I wish you luck with this guy and hope he is better than me for you. If not, I hope you'll fix yourself and find the right one, I believe in you.

That's how I really feel deep inside, no matter what you think.

M.

Thea?

>>17248374
the first step is not blaming your lack of parents, a lot of us went through the same thing and came out fine.
second step is taking daily showers because that solves your first 3 problems.

So what do you want?

>>17248391
No shower amigo. Would a bathtub work? I'm not even sure what kind of products to buy

Realize that nothing matters because there will be a point in the future where all human achievement is laid to waste and forgotten and the universe will continue on much the same as if no human had ever existed, and that all pursuits in life are meaningless beyond the inherent meaning they have to you as the observer.

tell yourself "fuck em all because we will all end up dead one day and no matter what we will a be equal so what ever the hell they want to say doesn't actually matter. Also realize the people who say shit are often insecure on the inside and don't know how to conduct themselves properly and you probably have a better chance than they do.

>>17248308

1. Walk into job interview.
2. Don't give a fuck what they think.
3. Don't get job.
4. Like a baws.

1. Ask a girl out.
2. Don't give a fuck what she thinks.
3. Don't get date.
4. Like a baws.

"Not giving a fuck what people think" is a meme.

Watch this for explanation, maybe you will get it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47MazYDnmaU