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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5080. page

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Long story short, my friend thinks he's a wizard, no joke. He refuses to call himself his normal name and now calls himself the "Dark Seal Master" He now runs around refers to others as "foolish humans" and trying to cast spells on people. Please for the love of god help me before he makes me commit seppuku.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17251625
Are you oppressing him by not using proper transwizard pronouns? You have no idea what it's like to feel like you belong in a wizards body. And if he looks and acts like a wizard, what's the big deal? just let him be and call him a wizard, let him express his true feelings.

I decided to go through with my transformation into a unicorn a few months ago and since then it's been very hard dealing with people who think I have some kind of dysphoria and can't properly assess reality and facts from my own absurd imagination and childish feelings. We should be doing more to support transwizard and transicorn rights and raising awareness so cis-scum like you can stop oppressing us. Fuck you.
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>>17251625
How old is he?
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>>17251625
Git out, summer scum.

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Good afternoon /adv/,

I'm a little sick of American politics and especially American media. I've joked around before about moving to Canada if things don't pan out positively here, and in light of recent events in this country and he inevitability of electing either an idiot or a lying criminal to be our national leader, I'm unfortunately considering that joke a little more seriously.

So my question is 1) to any Canadafags reading, especially ones that have successfully emigrated there, is it worth it? Where are nice areas to live that have good technical job markets? I was thinking Toronto suburbs since I'm in northeast US and would still be somewhat near my family.

2) How do you go about the process of entering and getting citizenship? I know unless you argue for skilled labor r something you can't get immediate residency, but since I have a degree and work in IT would I qualify? if not, is working/living under a work visa in Canada doable?

Thanks all, any other advice on not living in this country anymore also much appreciated.
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17251588
Nobody wants your disgusting american fat smelly fifth in their country. Stay in your hell hole and do not bring any of your garbage to countries that are not already fucked.
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I remember reading an article about how every US election year the amount of traffic on the Canadian immigration site skyrockets. This is your first voting age election year isn't it?
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>>17251598
I wouldn't want Americans either, but I like to think I don't belong in the degeneracy pit.

>>17251599
second election.

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I've got stomach ulcers and my doctor said it might be stress related.

I'm a kissless virgin and I feel like that's a large source of anxiety, and pretty much everything else in my life is fine. So, I was thinking of going to an Asian massage parlor or something.

I'm conflicted though because I feel like paying to fuck or even getting a handjob would be irredeemably pathetic though. Anyone else gone through with this? Any advice?
22 posts and 2 images submitted.
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It's bacterial, and sex wont help you at all.
get a girlfriend you stupid faggot.
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>>17251586
before you decide on an asian rub n tug you should do some research and learn about how most of them are forced into having sex with strangers to pay off the human traffickers and by paying for it you're supporting human trafficking. You're literally paying to rape someone.
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>>17251596
dont care LOL

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I am 22 and female of child bearing age and trying to cope with maternal feelings. I cannot have a baby right now because I am in school and building stability in my life, but these feelings will not go away! What are some things I can do to supplement my crazy maternal urges? I want to nurture something so badly. Are there any online baby games or something?
21 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17251577
I don't know much about women. But i don't think most of them want to have one at 22...idk
maybe hormones are giving you shit because of your diet?

you should get a toy baby doll. get a nice realistic one. I heard there are pill that can help you produce breastmilk even if you're not pregnant. Breast feed the fake baby...
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>>17251577
I don't really have any constructive advice, but I think this was cute. I'm wishing you luck in finding an appropriate outlet for your feelings. You could try pampering your significant other.
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>>17251577
I'm 20 and in the same position. Men won't understand and I'd never have a baby before I had a good job and husband but if God came down tomorrow and have me a huge house, stable job, and loving husband and asked if I wanted a baby at 20 I'd do it in a heart beat.

Right now my boyfriend is distracting me with a hamster. Get a dog or cat or something. Or maybe dote upon a little kid in your family.

I have a girlfriend I lost to weed about 2 months ago. She works at a pizza hut and rides around with some co-workers after the store closes around midnight. Even worse, I've detected hints that she may be cheating on me with the driver. I'm planning to break up with her and I want to get revenge and I'm hoping you guys can help.

My first act of revenge is to tell her about my trust fund that just came in. I'm getting 4500 biweekly for the next 13 years and she has no idea. If she knew she was being dumped by a soon-to-be richfag, it would crush her. She always had an unhealthy love for money.

Second, I want to camp out at a sheetz parking lot they always visit and wait for her ride to pull in. I would call up the local police department and leave an anonymous tip that a car full of adolescents smell like pot and are heading in x direction. I would go on about how I value everyone's life and other bs. I would tail the car and camp out once I saw an officer pull the car over and gloat from afar. I know the driver is a dealer and would be cuffed instantly. I wouldn't mind if the gf got cuffed too.

Thoughts? How would you guys enact revenge?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Revenge is for betas.
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>>17251571
....revenge for doing what to you exactly?

what the fuck is wrong with you?
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>>17251571
You're a chump

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What have I become?

>sexted with a girl on snapchat a week ago
>tried hitting her up again
>she basically declines
>she hits me up last night, sending me snaps of her cleavage and legs and stuff
>I ask her if she wants to see me touch myself
>Doesn't reply
>ask her if she wants to see me cum
>she says yeah cum
>I ask her to send me a pic of her boobs
>no response
>my phone was about to die so I sent her a snap of me cumming

It is like I've become so desperate for a nut that I'll practically embarrass myself. And It isn't like I have any shortage of sex partners. I'm having regular sex with one girl, and there is another girl a couple blocks from me who I fool around with, etc.

>Was what I did pathetic? Am I a cuck? Am I desperate? Was that inherently "wrong?"

I'm just worried about how I perceive myself. I feel gross and guilty.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17251567
>Was what I did pathetic? Am I a cuck? Am I desperate? Was that inherently "wrong?"
yes, yes, yes, no.

it was probably a man though.
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>>17251567

There was another time I was talking to this girl on Skype and I practically begged her to cam with me.

The most she did was put her hair in pigtails, suck on her fingers, show me cleavage and shake her ass.

And I'm here in my room showing off my dick to her while she is half interested in being sexy for me.

I just mean is this normal male behavior or do I have a problem?
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>>17251572

Nah, I know her irl. but she lives a couple hours a way.

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When it comes to Relationship versus Education, how do you choose?
I don't want to regret a life altering decision.
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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What exactly is the dilemma here?
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>>17251564
>Currently in LDR
>Applied to attend College A & College B
>Gf plans to work near College A
>Planning to move in together
>Recent changes to College A has made it difficult for me to pursue education route
>College B is the better choice if that's all i'm interested in
>College B means extending the LDR
>If we're both 'Full-Time' and unable to close distance I could lose her
>She is my everything

What do?
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>>17251600
Well as someone who once thought of his lover as his everything, I can safely say you should become fiscally secure first and foremost. I'd say you should put your studies first. I shirked my studies, thought everything would be okay, and I was cheated on for several months. The end result was an awful break up that I have still not fully recovered from.

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22yo kissless virgin can't have good conversations with girls.
They always prefer other guys.
Have this weird shit that i can't think sexually about girls unless i trust them and i don't. Many girls spread lies white or not and never find it morally wrong. I can never understand what they really mean. They can have boyfriends and lie about it.
I am anxious and don't want to be laughed at.
Help
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Complaining about your anxiety on 4chan won't help, go work out or something.
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Yeah, no help here. A psychotherapist would help you. All that will really help you is living is and being thoughtful and trying to evaluate your problems. one day it might click, and you'll realize how to be a competent and loving human being worthy of empathy like the original ending to Evangelion. it's what a lot of people go through growing up. just don't murder anyone. that is something you must never do if you want a chance of living a happy life.
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>>17251545

Did you just ride off into the sunset?

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I have everything I could ever want yet very often I enter these long slumps where i feel really empty and lose interest in all of my hobbies. I don't know how to stop them from happening and I they aren't caused by anything in particular. Please help. How do I stop it?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Meditate or go to church. Or do something spiritual. Sounds like you're getting disconnected from your spirituality.
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>>17251500

>my mind races with all my longings but can't keep up with what I've got.

Welcome to the world of ennui. There is nothing you can do to stop it.

Get out in nature and immerse yourself in the physical world. That is what has helped me best.
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Yeah this one drives me mad as well. Without purpose how do we define value and meaning? Purpose is often connected with a want or need, but in the absence of either we've got to try and find it as an individual. Previously why did I do something? I just had to do it. Why? Because I was trying to prevent myself going mad through self loathing due to inactivity.

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Long story short:
>co-worker fucks around with my wife
>I find out and leave her
>take a sick leave from work to sort out my life
>Return to work in a month from now.

I am nervous about how my other co-worker will perceive me and treat me when I return to work. I know how I would feel if it was one of my co-workers. After all this shit went down the asshole got demoted and is back to being a labourer, So I won't have to interact with him... I don't like talking about the shit that happened and get very heated and over-react before I can think... How should I approach the situation?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17251410
>I know how I would feel if it was one of my co-workers
How?
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>>17251410
They'll show you pity and look down on you. I hope you have some fine excuses prepare so you can save face.
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>>17251440
>excuses
Don't, just don't. Shit happened and there is nothing to make it unhappen.
Excuses mean you haven't moved on; accept things as they are and try to make it a forced opportunity to improve yourself in any way.

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Can someone tell me why I should care about the dead gays in Florida?
We don't care when a bomb goes off in Turkey, what makes Florida different?
Why should I care when bad things happen outside of my town?
Hell, why should I care when bad things happen outsude of the 5 or 6 buildings I visit frequently? (My job, my school, my house, the little bar, the gas station, the grocery store)

Somebody explain
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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No one said you have to.
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Ecology.
We're in a closed system.
It's just not good to have shit flung around.
Other than that, I don't care.
I didn't care when Columbine happened.
I didn't care when 911 happened.
However, I get the fact everyone else PRETENDS to care [social climbers].
I'm honest though.
If people don't have their priorities straight, and they don't help each other, but they pretend to care, then they're psychopaths.
People like you and me? We're reactive sociopaths.
We'd care if people cared and there was a system in place where shit mattered.
But it doesn't because people are mindless cunts.
Welcome to Woke World.
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>>17251370
To empathize. I wouldn't want that to happen to me, so I feel bad that it happened to you.

However, I don't understand why people overreact and post about it on social media, or say they cried over it and whatever when those people weren't their family or even people they knew.

Honestly, I feel bad, but not enough to do or say anything about it. Definitely not enough to make some boo hoo social media post about it. Honestly just happy it wasn't me or my family.

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21M with great facial aesthetics and 6'2". I have no problems getting girls, but sometimes they have bfs and I usually turn them down. The reason I ask is because there is this 4'11" cutie throwing herself at me atm, and wants to meet up at my house tomorrow. When we were drunk and I didn't know about the bf we made out and I sucked on her titties etc. Now the problem is her bf is like 6'3" and jacked af. I don't want to end up in hospital. Also I think my good friend has a beta orbiter thing for her and would be devastated if he found out.

I'm planning on to turn her down, or should I just YOLO and do it?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Yolo and do it
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I put myself in the other dude's situation. do I want to find out my gf cheated on me? Probably not.
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Hi, I'm the most fucked up guy in the world, and even I wouldn't sleep with someone else's GF.
First of all, it's stupid because it spells drama and conflict.
Secondly, it's also lame and pathetic... get your own GF... if you're too pathetic to win them over to be your GF, then you're no more a man than the loser you're cuckolding.
Also, sluts usually pass on STDs.
Don't do it, find your own girl.
Don't be pathetic. Be a man.

I kissed my girlfriend open-mouthed, and now I don't know what my next move should be? (if i need to do anything). Any suggestions?
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Keep doing that until she says otherwise.
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You have to be 18 to use this site.
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Now that you got her to open her mouth, put your penis in it.

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It rains outside, both want to stay in, just watching tv becomes boring sometimes.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>17251300
Play scrabble
Play chess
Cook a meal
Bake a cake
Clean the house
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Have sex
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>>17251300
Try doing a tabletop game. Its better with more people but a one player adventure isn't bad if one of you are a good storyteller.

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My boyfriend of 2 1/2 years was invited to go abroad for work for just 6 days with our old college. I have always trusted him deeply and so I encouraged him to have fun and make friends, etc. He came back and told me this story:
>worked all day, but partied all night
>made friends with lots of guys
>drank lots of rum and danced at clubs
>his group was approached by prostitutes at a club and some in his group were interested but he wasn't
>the guys knew he had a gf but still encouraged him to see prostitute - he declined by saying he was afraid of herpes (didn't wanna lose face in front of guys)
>still, he danced with one of the prositutes that night and bought her a few beers because she asked
>later that week went to a club with some guys and girls from his group and said while he was dancing with a girl she kissed him
>he said he didn't let it go farther than that
>he admitted he was kinda attracted to her
>said throughout the week he danced with several other girls
>said he felt guilty but also told the story like it was all really exciting

We have a policy to always be honest with each case other and I'm glad he told me. But should I be mad about this? I can't get this out of my head. It makes me feel terrible. I know he didn't really DO much, but maybe because lately I felt our relationship hasn't felt quite right this really bothers me. I'm not sure how to handle this.
47 posts and 1 images submitted.
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If you have a policy of being honest, just go tell him what you just wrote - that you feel hurt by it.

Don't try to use it as leverage or anything, just be clear about how you feel. If he respects how you feel, he will make more of an effort to not let it happen again.
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>>17251296
I don't necessarily disagree with this advice, but if a guy told the same story about his girlfriend dancing with a bunch of guys and "one of them kissing her" the chorus of "break up with that whore!" would be universal. Just sayin'.
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>>17251302
No it wouldn't. Seen it happen here many times. There will be those people, but they will be reasonably balanced by the "it was just dancing and a kiss and she was honest about it" people.

If it were sex, yes, the pitchforks would be hoisted and the torches would be lit. So lit.

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