Uggghhhh, it sucks being in a wheelchair forever.
Could it be worse for me? Y/N?
At least you can get sympathy sex from a hooker.
>>38426685
Why are you in a wheelchair? Do you still have feeling in your dick? It's hard to give your life a rating without this information.
>>38427130
Born this way. Yes.
>be me, have diarrhea from ice cream and soda
>have to stop looking at mods to shit
>almost shit self
>prairie dogging to the bathroom
>pull down pants and boxers
>before i even sit down shit starts flying
>still going and fart in stream
>shit goes everywhere
>just cleaned the toilet
will do more shit stories if you want
shitty greentext
>>38426799
Hahahahha it's funny because it talks about shit :)
>be me, 6yo
>have explosive diarrhea and need to shower
>shit self on way to shower pants are full
>throw clothes away, wipe, then get in shower
>halfway through shower I fart and think its fine
>IT ISN'T FINE
>a few moments later I smell it still
>turns out shit has splattered on walls
>while cleaning it shit right on top of drain
>waffle-stomp two chunky diarrhea streams
>smells in there
>sit there for about 30min until smell goes away
>tfw the aztecs will never come back
>mfw they have my life story
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0472043/
call me goofy-chan
>>38426633
>http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0472043/
good movie desu
shame (((they))) wouldn't let mel do a sequel to it.
>tfw the last two girls I've liked have rejected me because I'm NOT a virgin
I wish I was joking
>>38426602
You got a source on that cow you posted, op?
>>38426602
But were they virgins?
>>38426620
Sorry friend. I just saved it from here a while back.
>>38426631
The first one, no. The second one, yes.
Is suicide by ocean worth it? Drowning can't be that bad right? Swim out as far as you can until you get too tired, ideally at night.
When I was a kid I went unconscious because I went under and was resuscitated. So really I think you wouldn't feel much pain other than the initial gulping of water.
Suicide by taking a small boat and just rowing as far out as you can into the ocean would be pretty interesting but it you live it would suck
>>38426601
worth it? if you really want to die, sure, it's worth the effort.
>>38426630
You'll probably get brought back by the tide after a day. That would be an embarrassment.
I've lied in bed quite literally an average of 22 hours a day for the past 10 months. AMA
Are you fat, and do you have pictures of big boobies to spare (mind not you're moobs, shit like in your pic)?
>>38426592
I'm 6'2 170, pretty average BMI I guess. heres more CC
Do you plan on expanding your bedding all around your room, and then maybe into the rest of your home? You could be in bed all day if you did that.
>tfw not sure if I'm gay or been a virgin for too long
Probably a virgin for too long, you know if you're gay
>>38426543
it can be both. try thinking if there was any other time you were bicurious, like when you were younger.
>>38426577
>it can be both.
*it could be either
So this is the state of millennial men these days?
https://www.buzzfeed.com/tanyachen/michelle-and-josh?utm_term=.kbeBg1LJJ#.ajp3jRkqq
>>38426478
>Buzzfeed
Nice source, faggot
>>38426511
https://archive.is/iv0WD
here is an archive of it
>>38426478
>https://www.buzzfeed.com/tanyachen/michelle-and-josh
jesus... every single part of that URL is cancer
Why haven't we banned makeup yet?
cause its not a crime
>>38426457
Fuck makeup and fuck roasties.
yea girls are cheating. in nature the male is the desired one.
in order to continue browsing this board, you must post:
your age
the amount of money in your checking account
>tfw 20 years old
>tfw 1525.85 USD
>>38426447
>19
>$500
Been a NEET since I graduated hs, I hope I can change because it's not too late
>>38426447
>20
>No checking account; I'm not in possession of any currency whatsoever
>>38426447
>24
>$6,000 in my transaction account.
>Wait all week for that shift I share with the cutie at work
>She's at the register to my right
>Run out of paper bags
>"Hey, do you have any paper bags left over there?"
>"Sure, here you go Anon!"
>"Thanks"
>That's the entirety of our conversation for the 4 hours we worked together
>I'm going to count the days until we next work together this week anyway
I hate being such a beta, how do I change this? What the hell am I supposed to say to make conversation?
The secret to being alpha is believing women are attracted to you even if you aren't. Women are attracted to confidence and can't tell the difference between a fake and the genuine article.
>>38426378
you aren't supposed to make conversation. you staying silent saves you both from embarrassment. let her go on her own way
Get muscles and talk about how you got them and
Should I start smoking cigarettes?
Please don't respond with "its addicting and cancer", I am fully aware of the consequences.
I refuse to smoke weed on the grounds that my mom died of meth overdose last year.
I hate all drugs.
All of my family smokes.
Is it true it eases stress and helps you sleep?
>>38426368
nicotine is a drug
it's a stimulant
it'll make whatever thing you're doing slightly more enjoyable while you're doing it
>>38426423
So is that enjoyable feeling worth it?
>>38426454
it's better with caffeine. stimulants potentiate each other. no it's not worth it
>He's not Catholic yet
Why even bother? Daily reminder that Jesus is the way and the life.
>>38426337
Fuck off new trip, I hope you kill yourself along with the others.
>>38426362
That's not very nice, you're gonna have to go to confession for that one.
>new trip
We all gotta start somewhere, and I've been shitting up this board for weeks, surprised you haven't seen it.
>>38426337
Hitler wasn't catholic either, you stupid nigger.
>it's another anon goes to sleep at 8 am day
>>38426316
Why do you let this happen anon?
>>38426360
Because I go to sleep when I want because I have no responsibilities. Being up in the day makes no difference.
>>38426316
kek fucking this
oregano
Women, how the FUCK do you compete with this?
Who keeps posting this autistic shit? I'm a dude, your ordinary sexually perversed /b/tard that lurks /r9k/ for feels and remembering that women really do use the Internet.
Like seriously, women do not need to compete with that. I'm into short stack girls who are a little chubby and have nice breasts, don't care if they're a midget or only an inch shorter than me as long as they're not entirely deformed. Imperfections in skin, whether that's on the face or body, are completely overlooked. I just don't understand why "perfect" bodies are held in such high regard.
Women, you'll find a guy that's right for you some day. You don't need to compete with that pile of shit, she'll be getting gang raped by apes before she ever bears a non-bastard child.
>>38426312
Its that you think she is a ten. Its what makes it good for men and women alike that we all have different ideas of a ten. Different tastes
>>38426398
Is this pasta?
origoogoo