>be me, have diarrhea from ice cream and soda >have to

shitty greentext

>>38426799
Hahahahha it's funny because it talks about shit :)

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>be me, 6yo
>have explosive diarrhea and need to shower
>shit self on way to shower pants are full
>throw clothes away, wipe, then get in shower
>halfway through shower I fart and think its fine
>IT ISN'T FINE
>a few moments later I smell it still
>turns out shit has splattered on walls
>while cleaning it shit right on top of drain
>waffle-stomp two chunky diarrhea streams
>smells in there
>sit there for about 30min until smell goes away

ah, the wonders of the american diet. contributing to shit thread

>stomach bug going around
>7km run before work
>two miles in, mile away from the nearest bathroom, except for the fact that it's sunday and there's a church
>waddle my way up to the front door successfully before shitting my sweatpants on the steps
>line in the bathroom, guy making small talk about how i'm dressed pretty casual for church. i still don't know how bad it is.
>get in the stall and do the rest of my business. mostly clean up.
>my sweatpants are completely immaculate, untouched by fecal matter

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Ramen and coffee all day every day.

>be me, anytime i go to a friends
>first time i go to anyone's house I clog the toilet
>at robert's house laid a dinosaur egg in toilet
>FLUSH
>STOP THE WATER NIGGA
>its overflowing
>dont know what is happening
>his dad breaks in
>"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT DO YOU EAT"
>Roberts's house (again)
>diarrhea
>so much paper.......
>paper goes to bottom
>clogs
>starts coming up
>paper on top falls down onto the floor
>end up cleaning shit stained bathroom tissue off of floor

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I SWEAR ON MY HONOR I DON'T HAVE A FETISH BY THE WAY, BDSM IS MY THING.

AM GOING TO SLEEP GOODNIGHT 4CHAN

summerfag 101, this thread in a nutshell

gtfo off of 4chan you mongoloid

>>38427254
that looks like it sticks to your asshole still even when you wipe wtf

>>38427719
Sometimes. That was a 3 wiper though.