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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2626. page

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>my mom has a meetup with one of her old college friends
>I have to go with her
>her friend's daughter is going to be there
>mom tells me, "I'm letting you know ahead of time that she's really pretty so you won't be surprised, she's around your age" (I'm 21)
>yeah, I've seen pretty girls before
>the day comes
>she reminds me that this girl is really hot
>she shows me a picture of her in a bikini
>mom, what the hell
>we finally meet them
>yeah, she's pretty
>mom asks "what grade are you in?"
>"I'm going into 10th"

Long story short, I think my mom tried to set me up with a 15 year old girl.
9 posts and 3 images submitted.
Wow and you didn't have sex?
No. I barely spoke a word to her. I think I said hi. That's it.
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>I think I said hi

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We must destroy the alt-right at all costs to society.
7 posts and 3 images submitted.
We must destroy anti-AI sentiments to contain the possibility of AI supremacy
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The alt-right is going to save humanity by kickstarting the communist revolution. You just wait.
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>communist revolution
>in any 1st world country
That's a good one.

me and my oneechan
shes the best
7 posts and 3 images submitted.

You're the best. Everyone else is a stinky.
watching you in the shower is nice :3c
This is a very cute thread!

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Hey there, wagie, ready for another long and painful Monday?
60 posts and 11 images submitted.
Im off 5 days a week so nah.

I work 16s on sat and sunday doing very little
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Sure am. Only got about three hours of sleep on account of my fucking room being a hotbox and the fan being too loud to sleep next to. My entire existence for the rest of the day is going to be a fucking meme.
please keep these threads. these are some of the only original r9k threads nowadays. most of the robots have been scared off by the new redditfags.

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I am always hungry all the time even after I just ate but I never get bigger but according to my 25bmi I am overweight wtf reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
18 posts and 4 images submitted.
do you want to change OP?

Focus on eating protein and veggies.

t. 5'7 185lbs at 25% bodyfat.

Last time I was 160lbs (-25 pounds of fat) I had veiny shredded abs.
i want someone to want me
i need a bench and weights to lift with but i spent all of my money on weed and booze instead.

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>I hurt myself today
>To see if I still feel
>I focus on the pain
>The only thing that's real
>The needle tears a hole
>The old familiar sting
>Try to kill it all away
>But I remember everything
12 posts and 2 images submitted.
you listening to original or johnny cash cover?

the cover anon
suck ass how cash is known for the song more than trent reznor, trent reznor was the fucking genius behind the song not JOHNNY CASH REEEEEEEEEE

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>tfw can only get off to interracial and cuck porn now
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
Don't fap for at least a week or more to reset your penis
does kink resetting actually work? asking for a friend
I really fucking hope this works

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It's that time of day you stinky bastards get on omegle tags r9k, robot9001 or w/e
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
tfw cute omegle female (girl) skips you...
Bump trump
Any of you stupid fucks doing this, why are you not using a webcam. Are you this fucking insecure? Whats wrong with you? Show your face.

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>at store hanging outside with a friend
>hyper hot goth lookin girl drives up out of nowhere and calls me over
>lean in the window to see what she wants
>all she asks is if Im 21
>immediately realize she just wants me to buy her alcohol, tell her to fuck off like chad does every night after blowing his load on her
>feels fuckin good telling stacy off

Who else here not brainwashed by the pussy?
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
Good, you have learned to overcome
you could have asked her to suck your dick in exchange for the alcohol
This, come on anon, everybody knows Stacy will do anything for alcohol

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post autistic shit you do.

>see some really fucked up picture
>look away from my monitor at my mirror and pretend I am making a reaction face into the camera
84 posts and 13 images submitted.
Thats pretty fucking silly anon
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Holy fucking shit OP thank you so much for the wonderful laugh.

>sleep under mattress
>pretend I am making a reaction face into the camera
i only do that when im playing a game and it doesnt go my way

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>be sister
>anon, have you seen my birth control anywhere?
>omg anon this guy that I was "sort of" dating 2 years ago called me today
>I can't believe grandma is asking me about kids
>lol theres no way im getting married untill atleast 30

Will she die alone r9k?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
Not if you love her and always spend time with her.
But she goes to college. I fear she might use tinder too much and end up as used goods that nobody wants.
>can't find birth control
>"sort of" dates guys
>is going to ride the cock carousel until she's 30

Your sister isn't going to die alone anon. She's gonna die surrounded by Chad's, Chad's and Tyrones children after living her entire adult life as a single mother.

Did you order anything online? What are you waiting for?

I'm personally waiting for around 100 fragrance samples + .357 ammo storage box to store my samples in. I also am waiting for the Ghost In The Shell OST first official vinyl release. It got delayed so they'll also send a poster which is nice What about you?
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
I have the new Uncharted game pre-ordered, but that doesn't come out until August. I kind of want to pre-order the Shin Godzilla blu-ray, which also comes out in August. I'd rather just rent it, but I haven't hear anything about when it'll be available.

What do you mean by fragrance samples OP? Perfume/cologne? Or is it just vials of things to smell?
perfume/cologne indeed, I cant find them locally so I gotta order samples online
Sounds neat. I've had no sense of smell for as long as I can remember. I'm jealous.

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any girl who is proud of the new ghost busters needs a bullet to the head

That is a disgrace to woman, women should try to destroy all copies of it instead of acting like it's an accomplishment
>all forms of entertainment, nothing of importance
>nothing is sacred we will defile it all
Wrong. We still have trump

Hey guys, femanon here. why do you all hate women so much? i mean, my life is just as hard as yours, if not harder. being a girl is not as easy as you guys make it out to be...maybe if you all stopped shitting on women you would get some pussy :^) message me on discord if you're not a bitch (angelbear1997#4094)
39 posts and 13 images submitted.
Tits or gtfo

>i mean, my life is just as hard as yours, if not harder.

This is the part where i instantly knew this was fake.

Sage this shit
I don't hate women, I know it's my fault I'm emotionally uninteresting and boring

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i drank a shit ton of cough syrup to get high (delsym) but now i just have hives all over my body.

might go to hopsital, it wont clear up.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
That's rough, man.

If you really felt the need to get high so bad why didn't you just smoke pot or something?
OP's throat is going to close up and he will no longer be able to breathe. Call 911.
robo itch?

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