Storytime of Pain: US War Machine 2.0

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Previous Threads:
Day 1:
>>94011836(Marville)
>>94015371(Trouble)
>>94013505(The Unfunnies)
>>94017323(Nemesis)
>>94014562(Joker's Daughter)
>>94017305(Amazons Attack)
>>94015704(Change)
>>94024786(The Surface)
>>94017795(Earth-2: World's End)
>>94016653(Countdown pt. 1)
>>94021468(Countdown pt. 2)
>>94026850(Countdown pt. 3)

Day 2:
>>94036625 (The Rape of Ms. Marvel)
>>94033336(Jade Street Protection Service)
>>94037347 (Liberty for All)
>>94037063 (Champions)
>>94036764 (Nightwing: Brothers in Blood)
>>94035400 (The Deal/God’s End)
>>94038108 (America)
>>94040156 (Thoughts on Being a Girl in Elementary School and a few other zines)
>>94043883 (Cry for Justice)
>>94041770 (Marvel Mangaverse: Ghost Riders)
>>94044426 (Rich Johnston’s The Avengefuls)
>>94047152 (Sonichu pt. 1)
>>94055034 (Sonichu pt. 2)
>>94048652 (Phoenix: Legacy of Fire)
>>94048655 (Rise of Arsenal)
>>94051730 (Batgirl: Redemption)
>>94050809 (Chaos by Ithiliam pt. 1)
>>94051195 (Countdown pt. 4)
>>94055444 (Countdown pt. 5)

Day 3:
>>94064494 (Extreme Comics)

>>94066721
>Liberty for All
It's actually Liberality for All

>>94066681
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA YEEEEES

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>>94066737
You're right. Good catch. I'll fix it for any other storytimes idea. Also, that just made me realise that nobody has actually done Calexit yet. I assumed it and Liberality for All would be done back to back for some juxtaposition.

>>94066721
damn, the prequel sounds bad as well.

>>94066681
NO
NOT THIS

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That's right folks. This is, as far as I'm aware, the only instance of nudity in an official Marvel Comic. Savor it.

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>>94066793
Oh yeah, US War Machine 1.0 is shit, but it's kinda your standard Chuck Austen shittiness. The art is competent though so it's not really SoP-tier compared to some of Austen's other works. This though is on a whole other level.

>>94066681
Isn't it a bit soon for this?

>>94066731
Was it rape?

>>94066822
>I'm the head of the SHIELD!
Pfffffftttt. HAHAHAHAHAH

>>94066803
there's nudity in a bunch of MAX comics

>>94066681
Real talk, what are some actually good War Machine or War Machine/IM comics?

Oh fuck, I forgot about this one.

Didn't some nutcase make an Ant-circumcision superhero comic where his enemy was the jews? Has that been storytimed yet? Am I imagining this?

>>94066681
Oh God

I'm not sure if I'm ready for this

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>>94066913
Oh yeah, now that I think about it, there was nudity in Punisher MAX and Cage MAX wasn't there? Also, Supreme Power had Zarda's tits out. Been years since I've read any of them so I had forgotten. On the other hand, this is the third year in a row reading this.

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>>94066964
Ah yes, Foreskin Man. That's a classic.

>>94066681
Oooh, I've been looking forward to reading this ever since I started seeing individual pages on /co/ a few months back.

>If you thought Ghost Racers was bad

If you're talking about Mangaverse Ghost Rider, I actually kinda liked it. Damien and Satana were great.

>>94066964
Yes, that is a real comic

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>>94066846
Figured I'd kick off Day 3 with a bang. Plus, I kept worrying that someone else would beat me to the storytime, and I need those precious (You)s

>>94066921
>literally spitting some red ink as blood
oh boy

>>94066935
LMAO WTF

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>>94067027
More referring to the art. Ghost Riders is dumb fun, emphasis on the dumb, but there's a certain irreverent stupidity to the writing that I can't help but enjoy. This is similarly stupid, but takes itself a bit more seriously which almost makes it funnier since the juxtaposition of corny dialogue, overly serious subject matter, and horrible early-00s 3D art straight out of a porn comic is something else.

>>94066681
Whatever happened to Chuck Austen after both Marvel and DC blacklisted him anyway?

>>94067055
>>94067066
Did he just fire an RPG point blank?

Thing is, 3D models for comic art could work just fine. These models just fucking suck though.

Like, I'm pretty sure you could easily get better looking stuff on the Unity asset store, or just boot up a copy of Source Filmmaker and churn out a better product. And even then, maybe they ought to have gone stylistic instead of trying to have realistic textures, cause the latter just looks ugly as fuck.

And just to clarify, I'm speaking in general here. Ain't no saving this piece of shit. Chuck Austen is one of the worst writers in the business.

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>>94067124
Since he was driven out of the comic industry, he started writing Prose Novels with such Best-Sellers as:
>Like Warm Sun on Nekkid Bottoms
>Pride and Nakedness
>Something Old, Something New

>>94067157
Wait, WOG?
What's that supposed to be an acronym for?

Because its also a slur

>>94067136
this page makes me kek every time

I wonder how much money Marvel wasted on this CGI crap.

>>94067204
Considering the quality, I'd wager not too much

But it was 03, so I dunno

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>>94067183
Sad thing is that it's basically the '03 version of that scene from Hickman's Avengers where Deodatto had a clearly traced Helicarrier flying over a picture of a city with a filter overlay.

In a way, US War Machine 2.0 is ahead of its time. It's like the Dreamcast of Poser Art.

>>94067192
>>94067198
What the fuck is up with Captain America's outfit? Why this redesign?

>>94067230
>03
Seriously? But there were a ton of games out by then that looked great and still looked great. Metroid Prime is showing its age now, but it still holds up.

This comic, which as a comic doesn't have animation, has no fucking excuse.

>>94067341
Cap looks like a woman.

>>94067366
Well a comic series doesn't nearly have the budget a triple a vidya game has

>>94067403
You'd think that Tony would at least wait until they got the nuke to take back the tech

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>>94066681
>If you thought Ghost Racers was bad,

Who in their right mind would think that?

>>94067421
>>94067403
Oh, I guess he did, nevermind Im retarded

>>94067312
Did they develope Bucky in this universe or that is just it?
Damn, MAX universe had hard times.

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>>94067435
Meant Ghost Riders, not Ghost Racers. My bad.

>>94067408
>>94067420
>>94067427
>>94067436
What is even going on here

Whats with the squiggles. Is it electricity or something?

>>94067381
its dem lips, man

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>Doom dies the same way he did in Multiversity #1
I like to think that Morrison was referencing this scene. If not then hey, at least there's further confirmation that the hypercrisis is real.

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>>94067435
Again, who in their right mind would think that?

jk, just pulling your leg, I'll stop interrupting now.

>>94067524
Well, I guess all they ever needed to do was just shoot an arrow through Doom's head.

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>>94067563
>works on Doom
>works on Hulk
"Arrow to the head" seems to be pretty damn effective.

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And that's it for my favorite of the SoPs, but the weekend's not over yet! The paintrain keeps on rolling.

>>94067524
How does a fucking arrow pierce Doom's metal armor through his entire head?

>>94067594
Hahahahaha
I forgot about that ending

>>94067594
>616 Marvel is just Tony MAX's coma induced dreams

I STILL have a hard time trying to find a reason someone okayed this. Did they only have thirty bucks to make a comic and only the editors nephew was available to actually make it?

>>94067596
they mentioned about a piercing arrow before. We just didn't know if it was that piercing or whatever.

>>94066681
This made me strangely nostalgic for early CG shows like Shadow Raiders and Xcalibur, so that's... something.

Why do these pages all look like they're covered in jizz?

>>94067688
only thing it did for me was remind me of Xavier Renegade Angel

>>94067502
>>94067511
>>94067524
this is even worse than the Doom in the current comics

>>94066681
I admit i never actually sat and read this even though it gets storytimed every year. Just looking at random pages is enough to prove its position in SoP.
Ok, i'll give it a go this time.

>>94067987
same. it wasn't worth reading 2bh

>>94067534
>Quick! We must fly into the jpeg!

>>94066841
This page is always funny

>>94066731
Poserfaggot here
I'm so sorry, Austen should have drawn this.

JSYK between setup and rendering, he probably saved very little time not drawing it.

>>94067150
>Thing is, 3D models for comic art could work just fine. These models just fucking suck though.

It was 2003 and DAZ had nothing better than Michael/Victoria 3 which were sculpted by someone they eventually let go. It wouldn't be until 2006 that DAZ didn't have a figure whose face wasn't creepy out of the box and 2008 before the male version of that figure was available. More importantly, it wouldn't be until about 2010 before competent character designers stopped dial twiddling or making individual feature morphs and started just doing full head sculpts in Zbrush.

>>94067157
Chuck is an executive producer on Steven Universe. He's not going anywhere any time soon.

This is the stand out of the weekend SOP. I don't think anything can ever be as bad as this.

are there any good 3DCG comics out there?
seems like none of them do the lighting correct so they look too weird

>>94068749
Most decent comic artists stay away from 3DCG because of the inherent limitations. When your characters are 3D models, and change to the character means you have to make an entirely new model. If you want your character to take off his shirt, that's a new model. If you want your character to change his clothes, that's a new model. Not to mention that CG characters inherently less capable of expressing motion in fixed images- they can't go off-model because they are the model.

The former problem obviously isn't a problem with enough budget, and the latter only applies to fixed images, which is why 3DCG is popular in movies nonetheless. For comics, even below-average drawing typically looks better than mediocre CG.

Note that I'm mainly talking about CG as applied to characters here, there are plenty of artists who cut corners with CG backgrounds and that can look fine, if cheap.

>>94069044
yeah it seems like since they work very differently they're just inherently not very suited for comic books.

I was also talking about CG characters, because like you said artists do sometimes use some Sketchup cityscape as a background

Man, I kinda wish I owned this in floppies just for th enovelty,

>>94068636
Just wait to see if someone will do "Girls"

>>94071192
Quite a few of the classics still need done. Ultimates 3/Ultimatum is another.

>>94066803
Good lord, why?

>>94066841
I don't understand at all. What the everloving fuck. Everyone who worked on this was fired and blacklisted, right?

>>94067129
Sure did.

>>94074170
Actually, Chuck Austen did end up getting blacklisted by both Marvel and DC and driven out of the industry, but that didn't happen until years after this came out.

>>94067181
What the fucking fuck?!

>>94067436
Is this "Tony Stark is a fucking hippy liberal faggot for not wanting to give the military lots of Iron Man suits to run around the world to kill Ayy-Rabs in?"

>>94074483
Wiki doesn't say why. What got him blacklisted if not this utter shit-show?

>>94073529

>>94067124
He works on a little show called Steven Universe, you might have heard of it.

>>94075070
>if not this utter shit-show?
The dozens of other shitshows that followed.

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>>94067157
>they see your dick

>>94078540
At least bump with image.

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>>94080289
Here's one for next time