Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 9534. page

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Would you have liked to be a writer, robots? You get to stay inside, being alone all day is socially acceptable, be creative with your time etc.

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Does anyone else not see the point of getting a girlfriend?
Haven't you already realized the true nature of women?

They'll never really love you the way you love them. If your looks fade, she'll leave you. If your status goes away she's gone in the wind. Sometimes she'll just leave you cause she's just a whore who wants to try more cock.

The solution to overcoming loneliness and sexual frustration comes with two steps.

1) Masterbate to porn a lot. Save up money for escorts each month and do whatever you want with them. Its fast, convenient, and there's no tricks. Absolutely nothing wrong with paying for it, don't let society's bullshit fool you. If you pay for escorts, normal women can't control you with their vagina, which is why cucked normies look down upon it.

2) Make a lot of friends. Guy friends. Hang out each weekend, have a good time. These are true comrades, they won't backstab you, they won't trick you. This helps loneliness. Do not under any circumstances make female friends, they always make awful friends. Females are just awful people in general.

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i bought a really old girl scout uniform though and it fits me really well

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>moved out of my mom's house 8 years ago when I was 19
>brother of same age also moves out
>we go seperate ways
>I float the idea that we should be roommates half jokingly
>he laughs
>haven't seen or talked to him in 8 years
>my best childhood friend, my brother, could be dead for all I know
We may have had our fights, and I know I never said it, but I love you more than anybody else in the entire world. I want to talk to you again. We never truly had any deep conversations, we only ever joked and toyed with each other. I wouldn't even know what to say to you if I called. I just want to be young children again and have you standing at my side like brothers do.

I miss you brother.

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I need a male perspective on something, and what board has more males?
My boyfriend and I rarely have sex (every six months or less, one time we went nine months). I told him it seemed like he was asexual and he got mad at me.
Once or twice a week in bed we make out and fondle each other, but it seldomly progresses past that.
My sister gave me 4 condoms out of her purse at Christmas and we haven't used any of them, they are still in the bedside table drawer.
Is this normal? I don't have a high sex drive but I thought that a man would so I worry he simply doesn't like me that much.

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ITT:
What should we do for retribution day?
I know it's far away but it's good to be prepared
I originally planned to invade HWNDU but it got shut down, idk, should we invade any vidya forum or some shit, we gotta do something for the supreme gentlemen.

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For all my german robots,
next month weed will be legal.

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>Higgins is only ~160cm
Ireland is officially the most manlet-friendly nation.

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Explain yourselves smokers, why do you continue to kill yourself to get your nicotine fix when there is an alternative that is safer and gives more nicotine?

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MOMAAAA
I DON'T WANNA DIEEEE
SOMETIMES I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN BORN AT AAAAALL

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Why don't you dress nicely?

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>younger sister's phone breaks
>parents rightfully don't want to pay up for a new one while hers is getting fixed
>tell her to just put her SIM card in my ancient iphone from like 5 years ago
>nothing wrong with the phone, i just switched to an android a long time ago
>she does
>think nothing of this
>she comes into my room 30 minutes ago
>OMG ANON HAHAHAHA
>shows me safari
>has typed "you" into the url bar
>a shit ton of youporn links
>mfw i never cleared the history
>mfw my sister has seen all the porn i watched 5 years ago
>period of my life where i was really into ripped videos of camgirls

Have any of you ever had your family discover your fap material?
What happened?

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>cute e-boi on steam
>doesn't respond to my messages

reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee just fucking respond

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How do little kids act around you?

It is often said that babies and toddlers are the most reliable judges of your attractiveness; if you're ugly, they'll cry when they see you or become nervous, and if you're goodlooking they'll like you.

Don't know how true that is, but kids generally love me. A couple weeks ago i was at the drug store buying a pack of cigarettes. An inconsiderate mother was taking her sweet time buying a whole bunch of shit. Her daughter was in a stroller behind her. She kept staring at me, making me very uncomfortable. But everytime i looked at her, her face lit up with a huge smile and she'd say hi and wave at me. I reached in my pocket to see how much change i had, and dropped a quarter. It rolled right over by the mom's foot, who didn't even notice. I decided i would wait for her to be done since i would have to reach down under her skirt to pick it up. The little girl seemed distraught that i couldn't get to my quarter, she kept looking down at it, then back up at me, going "mommy.. Mommy", then started trying to reach for it. This little girl actually cared, it was the cutest thing ever.

That's generally how kids are towards me. With everyone i've known who had kids or little siblings, the little ones always thought i was awesome. No idea if it has anything to do with being pleasant looking, but i'd make a damn good father that's for sure.

If only women could see that. They're supposed to be genetically hardwired to pick the best mates to have kids with, but they can't even do that right with all the single mothers there are.

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I'm really self conscious about my first time, which will be with an escort. See, the way I wipe my ass, it smears the shit toward my taint. I'm worried she'll smell the shit while sucking my dick and kick me out.
Am I a beta for caring if she smells feces?