Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6307. page

If you don't find it put up a note in the green room asking whoever removed it to return it, as it has sentimental value to the cast member who graciously let you borrow it.

>>16767816
I'm worried she is going to turn voilent

>>16767817
Lol, actors. If that happens, call the police. Otherwise try to find her mirror.

you have to weight the pros and the cons.
If sex is reaaaally important to you : find someone who will satisfy you, if it's not important, keep enjoying her personality.

Don't worry bro, there are PLENTY of nice girls that would treat you the exact same way your current gf treat you + nice sex....
She's not as unique as you think she is.

Good luck

why is your sex not satisfying to you?

>>16767773

We don't have it

>>16767708
>go to doctor.
>tell them "i blow it quickly"
>the end.

It's a doctor. They literally deal with dozens of cases 10x more embarrassing, or exactly the same, every single day. I've worked in the medical field. Nobody gives a shit.

>>16767720

what the hell could be more embarrassing?

>>16767723
>i can't get erect at all.
>it burns when i pee.
>check out these warts.
>check out this cock rash.
>there's a banana in my ass.

Don't sweat blasting your chowder early. It's much more common than you imagine.

iktf

You'll get used to it soon enough.

>>16767676
that makes me feel even worse :(
why does life do this to me? I'm trying so hard

Aw anon I'm sorry
You sound really lovely and genuine. You matter to me.

>>16767650
you can always keep trying
but she has made it very clear that she isn't in love with you.
so maybe you should stop wasting your energy on getting her.

she is not in love with you, deal with it, keep her as fuck buddy or move on, there's no happy ending for you in this situation.

>>16767668
>>16767666

OP here
I think you're right gentlemen. I really did everything I could to get her, just hope we can fuck some other time at this point.

I figured I would have been satisfied after fucking her brains out, but it is never like that, I'm just in love.

>>16767629
Depends on the place.

>>16767688
A cafe

>>16767703
Then invite here to a cafe. The worst she can say is no, or decline for another time.

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>>16767557
Here's one of the replies I got:

> Admittedly I think I'm quite odd being sleepless and choosing to browse Craigslist instead of counting sheep ... Platonic cuddling is such a good idea I couldn't help but reply. But anyway here goes!

> I think I'm in a similar boat as you, not quite ready for a new relationship but missing the intimacy (not sexual) - like reading together (or as introverts like me could say, being alone together), or even being read to while cuddled under a warm throw :-)

> Hmmm what else... Oh the describe yourself part - 25, Asian, petite (not thin though, average), employed full time, try to be a good conversationalist but I'm quite the shy/quiet type. I do warm up eventually though :-)

> So there's that! I'm not sure how this'll go or if you'll even reply with all the possible spam (or real replies, I'm quite certain I can't be the only who finds this an interesting proposition!)... I do hope you find what you're looking for, and if that might be me, send me a message.

> M

inb4 she's gaysian
I'm in Hongcouver so that's gonna be half of the people here right off the bat.

Anyhow, this is what I sent back, along with my pic (as stated, I'm average, so at best 7/10):

> It's refreshing to get a response that doesn't have the atrocious Craigslist grammar we've all come to know and love. I also like that you're a reader. No worries about being shy -- I used to be shy as well, so I can relate -- and I wasn't looking for a party buddy anyhow. :)

> How about meeting for a coffee or tea first, which gives you the opportunity to ascertain I'm not a deranged axe murderer or shape-shifting lizard from outer space?

No reply. Assuming it wasn't the pic that turned her off, where did I sperg specifically?

>>16767560
And here's another email I got:

> Does this mean I'm an amateur cuddler?

> I was hoping we could discuss your ad a little further. First off, congrats on being more unique than any other cuddle ad I've read. But I hope you can understand when I say a normal, friendly, empathetic, clean and healthy woman such as myself still views your ad with some skepticism. So my question for you is, won't you still need to find someone somewhat attractive before you snuggle up to them? I'm just of the thinking that cuddling still leads to other things. Especially if alcohol is involved.

> My proposal to you is this. If you decide to choose me as your potential cuddle buddy, no drugs or alcohol will be involved. Food and other beverages always welcome:)

> I am genetically female, in your age range but look younger, of eastern chinese descent but born here, very thoughtful of others and have half a brain so I can usually hold a conversation. Though based on your short blurb I can tell your vocabulary is definitely larger than mine. English is my 2nd language so yes, that is my excuse:)

> Happy Monday!

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>>16767563
And below is how I responded to that one; again, that was the end of the conversation, so I'd like to know how it is that I killed it. As far as I can tell, it's consistent with my original post, so what is it that they didn't like that wouldn't have prevented them from emailing me in response to the CL ad in the first place?

My friend says I'm being too casual, but about the wrong things, and "let coffee be when you start showing off your red flags, not in the email". I don't know how to interpret these comments, and he's not responding now to clarify... Anyways, I'm hoping that some normie or near-normie can elaborate on whatever the various social faux-pas I'm making are.

> I should hope you're an amateur, as I shudder at the thought of professional cuddlers.

> Your question is difficult to answer because I've never done this before. My estimate is that the threshold in terms of perceived attractiveness is extant but a lot lower. Moreover, if the person I'm cuddling is too attractive, that might be a detriment -- after all, I don't want to end up needing to mentally command my body "down boy!" :) So, along these lines, the best fit would be a woman from average to cute or pretty rather than hot or sexy (and the the difference there is partly one of attitude).

> Since neither one of us is looking for anything aside from cuddling, I don't see a risk of it leading to anything else without an explicit conscious decision by both parties. I only drink for taste and only on occasion (usually cognacs at least XO level), but if you don't trust yourself around any alcohol, then I'm fine with omitting it completely.

> English is also my second language (ergo the accent I mentioned). I think that's actually helped me with grammar, as learning it was a more conscious process. My vocabulary, on the other hand, I owe primarily to Henry James and Joseph Conrad.

>rewind to two days ago where a really cute (and younger) chick starts hanging around where I work everyday and eventually asks for my number and we've been texting about ourselves.
If this is all that it takes to get you to want to break up, there's no way you can do it without being 'a total fuckboi' or a 'douchbag'. You ARE both of those.

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>>16767348
Have you talked about being exclusive with your current gf? If yes, then you're cheating. If not its kind of a grey area. On the one hand you haven't specifically comitted to not seeing anyone else, on the other 8 months is a pretty long time, it's kind of implied after 6 months.

>>16767359
>If not its kind of a grey area
I think 8 fucking months along it's pretty obvious that they're exclusive. Are you saying that 5 years into a relationship you could *technically* not cheat just because you never had the exclusivity talk? They're exclusive unless they've expressly said that they're not.

>>16767283
I also don't know if $45 is straight up like, cheap as in "I should spend more." I guess with earrings of the same price it'd be maybe a total of $100 but that still seems like it might still be "cheap" for jewelry? I don't want to get her anything that shitty.

Cliché heart-shaped cubic zirconium works every time.

Don't ever purchase jewellery online. How lazy do you have to be to buy jewellery online anyway?

>>16767266
I could have sworn you stole this image from WTFSocialJustice but the last option is "transnigger" and I'm pretty sure she isn't a racist cunt.

May i suggest gendervoid?

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>>16767270
Found the non-retarded non-racist one.

>>16767274
Lol, I love this one. I posted it in a Facebook chat once and my girlfriend at the time got super mad at me. Then my friend got pissed off and started a fight with her.

if they are gay

If you want, sure.

I like the color pink but am not the sort who gives a fuck about the color of his underwear.

bumpin

>we've kind of talked about it

meaning she soft-rejected you and you don't get it.

Do not do this. Love letters are for people who already share and recognize love. You're not even close to that point yet. What's appropriate for your position is to show your affection instead. Take her out. Enjoy the quirky things in person and tell her you like them in person.

>>16767112
>>16767115
So no note of any kind? I was going to try to make it mostly casual, but still clear if that makes sense

>>16767050
If you ask her, you could be the guy she goes out with.

If you don't ask her, you will never ever be the guy she goes out with.

Ever.

>>16767093
I know. I feel like I'm not ready yet, but she gets more beautiful every day, so I'm thinking I might have to take a chance.

>>16767125
Put no excuses man, you are as ready as you want to be.

>>16766925
Which country? If it's Israel, you've done a bad thing.

that is a nice picture. we need more stuff like that instead of everyone trying to be hipsters

there's a refugee visa available in the US, but you're probably not qualified

>>16766838

You know, most people just delete their failed spellings.

>>16766842
The delete button on my phone sometims jams


Serious question though.

I think he would like it.

Im sorry about the spelling.

Please tell me how to get that vibrating massger into my mans butthole