>try to sleep
>dad coughs up a lung literally every minute
>hear him sniffling coughing and gurgling shit all night
Is there a way for poorfags to get away from these monsters known as parents?
>>16759339
Its called a job.
>>16759339
They're called earplugs.
>>16759356
>he lives in a rural area where people can get affordable rent
Relationship with my GF of about 16 months has gone cold. We haven't had sex in close to 2 months and I'm always the one who has to initiate it. I tried talking to her about it and she doesn't think there's a problem, it's like trying to communicate with a wall. Also the sex has been super boring for the past 6 months or so. The only real physical contact not initiated by me is pecks and hand-holding. Tried sending her a playful, sexy text this weekend and got met with a deadpan response which ended in an argument.
There's no spark and we talk and hang out like friends. I think I'm gonna break up with her this weekend. Sucks because over the past year we shared a lot together. We were each other's best friends for the entire relationship. But it's making me unhappy and I'm starting to resent her for it so it needs to end I think.
BTW, I'm not so shallow that this is the only issue. We've also had some big fights. And the fact that I can't ever get her to communicate about anything has been a common theme for almost the entire relationship.
She comes from a pretty emotionally abusive home and she has a VERY hectic schedule (works about 50 hours a week, goes to school) so I'm sure these things at least contribute to the problem. Confusing thing is, it wasn't like this at first. I used to be just fine with our sex life but then something changed.
Couple more facts: I moved to a city 1.5 hours away like 5 months ago for various reasons, so the distance could also have something to do with it. Also, I've explored the possibility that she's cheating, and I'm fairly sure that's not the case.
Are our lives just going in different directions? A big part of me would hate to break up with her, but more and more I feel like it would be the most fair thing for both of us.
Any insight is appreciated.
>>16759250
Sex is like a barometer for how your relationship is going. Once the sex dries up there are generally other problems. If she's not even willing to communicate with your about this it will just get worse and worse. You had a good run, but it's time to ramble on.
>>16759284
How can I do this tactfully? Should it be ASAP or would it be ok to wait until like sunday afternoon when I see her this weekend?
I haven't seen her in a couple weeks and all I can think is I at least want one more night just to hold her.
>>16759303
It's best to do it in person, but don't expect to hold her again. It's supposed to hurt. Just tell her you're not feeling loved, not feeling like a priority. Just be honest that you feel like it's best and you're lives are going different places. don't try and "break it to her easy" because that just confuses people. Don't ry and "be friends" after, because then it's impossible to get over each other. Think of it like a band-aid. The quicker you rip it off, the quicker it's over.
I'd like to start off by saying that this isn't me throwing myself a pity party, it's me actually looking for advice on how to change my life for the better. mu biggest issues in life right now are my inability to get laid, and my complete and utter boredom/lack of motivation in life.
>be me
>19
>7-8/10
>on medication for depression, keeps it at bay for the most part but I've had suicidal thoughts in the past
>hated HS, thought it was insanely boring, serious depression
>Got over my depression, dated a 9/10 awesome girl senior year, she was a junior, was my first GF
>the farthest we got was a HJ
>Broke up with me the summer before college because she couldn't look at me without thinking about how I was going to be off at college with other women in a few months
>Went to college with tons of confidence and energy
>Roommate is insane, picture the most offensive stereotype of a gay black guy, that's him. Hangs gay porn on the walls and his bed is covered in semen stains. Snores EXTREMELY loud. He does annoying shit so I make fun of him and as a result we hate each other
>rest of my floor is the football team, all extremely annoying
>completely isolated on my floor as a result
>I've made ~5 decent friends and many acquaintances, but don't feel super close with any of them. Feel really alone all the time
>Haven't hooked up with anyone, then again haven't met any girls that I really want to fuck here
I'll post the rest as a reply, field too long.
>>16759248
So that's what brings me to my current situation. Because of all the shit I'm dealing with, I've just accepted feeling like shit, and as a result I just feel empty. I don't care about anyone. I'm not socially awkward, but I've grown so apathetic that no one wants to get to know me because they sense my apathy and assume that I don't like them. I try to act nice but it just feels fake and gross to me. I wish I could be nice and warm, but I just feel so empty. Not depressed, just empty. I don't want to do anything. I have to force myself to go to class, and I don't have the energy to do my readings/HW. My weekends consist of me getting insanely drunk and going to parties, even though I hate them, just in an effort to meet new people. The only time I'm truly happy is when I go home to visit my friends.
I honestly don't know what to do. I don't feel depressed, or hate myself, I just feel hollow and dead inside.
the most concerning thing to me here is that youre not taking your academics seriously, if you can't muster the effort to do your work eventually when you get further along in your studies and have to put forward 100% of your effort you wont be able to and you'll start failing classes until you eventually flunk out. It may be time to take a long sober look as to whether college is really for you.
>>16759261
I completely agree. I'm a smart person, I got into a decent school with a massive scholarship, but I get by in HS because it was insanely easy, and I cheated quite a bit. College really isn't for me, it bores the hell out of me and I hate classroom learning but I don't see any other option honestly. I need to make a lot of money to support the lifestyle that I want, and it's unlikely that I'll be able to without a college degree. It sucks, but it's better than the alternative.
>work at a restaurant
>I am liked by all my coworkers
>this one cute girl laughs at my jokes
>shes 21 and i'm 28 though...
>i am still relatively attractive and not neckbeard virgin
how do i make my move bros. i just want to see if she would be open to kissing. i think she likes me a lot as a person/coworker but how do i gauge if she would be ok for a little intimacy?
>shitting where you eat
> girl laughs at my jokes
> she wants the D
Are you okay with working with someone that rejected your advances? Or working with someone that you dated and then broke up with? I'd find it awkward as fuck but if it's okay with you, go for it
>Known girl since September
>She's a 9/10, smart as fuck, and shares my humor
>At first I didn't like her romantically cause I was dating someone else at the time
>She also had a boyfriend
>Became good friends and kept it at that
>Girlfriend cheats on me with eye candy douchebag frat dude
>She (friend) helps me cut ex out of my life so I'm not as much of a pushover
>We start talking more, nothing romantic yet though
>She's still dating her boyfriend
>She starts getting unhappy with her relationship
>I give her basic advice like "Just talk it over with him, you'll be fine" blah blah blah
>A couple months pass, it's now December
>Her relationship gets worse and worse
>We're still talking more and more but I don't really see her as someone to date cause she's with someone else
>Over winter break she tells me she thinks she's going to break up with her bf soon
>She tells me we should stop talking for a while cause she's starting to see me as a better boyfriend than her current boyfriend
>I agree, tell her to get things sorted out
>Two days later, she starts talking to me like nothing happened
>I go along with it, I'm an asshat who wanted to talk to her, yeah yeah
>Start developing feelings for her after the confession
>A couple weeks later, she tells me that her and her boyfriend agree that they won't stay together much longer but they'll stay together to see what happens
>What the fuck, that's really dumb IMO
>I tell her "Wait, you've half-broken up with each other? The point of breaking up is realizing you're not fit for each other and separating because of that and you've done half of that"
>She has an "Oh shit" moment and says she didn't think about it that way
>She tells me she's going to break up with him and calls him over to her place to do it
>They're broken up for two days, I keep telling her that she should spend some time being single to get her feelings in order cause she's kinda a confused mess at the time
Holy shit this is long
what exactly is your question?
Cont
>Her ex approaches her in class the day after their split and asks her to talk at a cafe
>She agrees, tells me that she just wants to get a clean break because she just rushed her breakup
>Fuck yeah I know that's a lie, she still wants to be with him
>I tell her "You know that if you meet him, you'll just get back together with him"
>She says no no no, it's not gonna happen
>They go to the cafe, she said it'll take like 10 minutes
>3 hours later, she messages me saying they got back together
>Even though they know they're "not the ones for each other, they want they're relationship to have a good, natural end" where they both stand up one day and say "Y'know, I just want to be your friend, not your SO"
>She says that the reason she broke up with him that she was in denial for was that she liked me too much and broke up because I told her to
>oh god damn it
>I tell her off saying I've been trying to support their relationship for months and gave her advice on how to do so, and I can't really say that her boyfriend is a good fit for her because she's only told me the bad shit about him
>She folds and says it's her problem, blah blah blah, I've been her best friend in college so far
>I tell her to give me a week of separation to "think about things" (I wanted her to have that week to get her relationship together without me)
>She say's she doesn't want to lose me as a friend, I tell her that's not what's happening, I just want time away
>She reluctantly agrees, we don't talk for like 18 fuckin hours until class the next day
>She messages me "Is sitting next to me too much contact?" (We have two classes together so I sat away from her in both)
>I read it but planned on replying after class
>Before I can, she runs up to me and says "Hey"
>I tell her that this is against what I said and that it's just a week
>She gets upset and walks away
>fuck
Holy shit this is a lot longer than I thought, part 3 I guess
>telling her to spend time alone
nah nigga you hop in that pussy asap because either way she wont want you in the end. Shell go back to him. Get the pussy while its available.
Youll kick yourself in the ass later if you dont. Trust me. Never wait for women. and DONT EVER GIVE THEM THE OPPORITUNITY TO WAIT.
broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years last night..
i just need some moral boosting advice on what to do to kind of get over the whole losing the love of my life thing
This is an opportune time to observe your mind. You will see flashbacks, memories, good times, bad times.
Just sit with it. Don't act on anything. Get calm and just observe.
Losing? You threw her away, you nimwit.
>>16759102
theres no actual way to speed the process of getting over it, at least one we can recommend. you might find your own way to make peace with things but thats kinda the thing abotu people, they really are retarded snow flakes.
all that being said, now would be a good time to start admitting she is no 'love of your life' or rather, that there is no love of your life. that would speed it up to get out of the mindset that you let go of something permanent
also you didnt lose her, you broke up with her
So I've battled with depression and suicidal issues combined with anxiety and all sorts of other things in my life. The only thing I've ever found that made me feel "normal" is opiates. They make me feel like I can talk to someone without being scared for no reason, they make me love others and care sincerely about them and in the best cases help me to forgive people I could never forgive without them.
So my question to you /adv/ is : is this how anti-depressants are supposed to make me feel? Am I supposed to feel happy and "good" about life when on an SSRI medication? Why aren't opiates prescribed as an antidepressant for people like me where it makes their life so much easier and clearer?
The sickness is inevitable. I send prayers for you when you get hooked. I say just smoke weed or use alcohol if the weed makes you more worse. I use booze personally because like you said, I see everything clear and can speak without worrying about my insecurities.
>>16759300
I already drink relatively heavily. But I've gotten to the point to where alcohol doesn't affect me as much any more and I need a large amount to get me really good feeling. Plus, I can't drink and drive and weed makes me have panic attacks.
You're supposed to feel less depressed. If you still experience depression symptoms, talk to your psychiatrist.
I've been on 14 drugs for depression (mine is treatment resistant), and what happened at first is they would up the dose of my existing drug or add a new drug; when those fail, you switch your current drug for a new drug, and check back in six weeks until something seems to work, in which case they up the dose until you hit the max. Repeat ad infinitum.
Most people who use antidepressants are only ever on one or two drugs, but my depression seems to require the magic drug fairy's pimpin pharmaceuticals.
>my pre-ECT physical is tomorrow
>if drugs don't work apparently shocking your brain can! yaaaay...?
How do you even make such a transition
finish shaving put on glasses and look down.
Get a decent haircut, stop dressing like a teenager.
> take a shower
> get a hair cut
> put on glasses
pic related
Need some /adv/ice
>been texting this girl for months
>tells me 2 weeks ago she broke up with bf
>1 week ago i told her we should do something together
>"ofc anon"
>next day go to her house
>have a great time, we play videogames, make dinner, talking, laughing and drawing together.
>playing some multiplayer game on her ipad
>sit next to each other
>take my arm around her waist
>if anything she leanes in a bit
>sit like that for atleast an hour
>have some semi deep conversations trough out the night
>3 am
>time to leave, give her big hug
after that she has been somewhat "care" when we talk online, and she doesnt always answer me when i text her. dont missunderstand, she always texts back when i say something worth responding to. But before we met she responded no matter what i said.
She has been struggling in the past, and showed me some cuts on her arm, and i asked why she did it and she shouldt do that. Did i handle it wrong?
I am 20 years old and she is 18.
Almost 100% she is over her ex, says he was an idiot and stuff.
As far as i know we had a great time together.
texted her the morning after that it was cozy and got a text back "iknow" with 2 smileys.
Is it some kind of game she is playing or doesnt she like me?
Picture not related, something i drew in paint while high
OP here.
I said she sholdnt cut herself*
She wouldnt give me an answer anyways
She likes you, but you guys are too young for a very deep display of affection. Especially her. Especially with the cutting.
You cannot walk into this with any expectations. Pretend like she's incapable of giving you signs or signals. Until something hits you right in the face, don't read into it. Just keep your eyes on your target.
>>16759052
>She likes you, but you guys are too young for a very deep display of affection.
Could you elaborate with more "friendly" words please? Norwegian here, so my english is not tht advanced.
Should i not ask her about the cutting?
What percent of OKCupid users are troll accounts, and what some ways of being able to tell? Should I run pictures through reverse Google images?
> Pic related: suspiciously similar-looking men, and they both were right next to each other on my searches
>>16759004
Racist fuck. So all asians look the same to you?
>>16759004
Perhaps they are real accounts, just run by the same person. It could explain why they all showed up for you, same guy answeres questions similarly for each profile. Or not, whos to say.
>>16759134
I think the top two are different people, but bottom two look identical to me.
I really need to find a career but I'm not sure what to do, all my friends are getting ahead and I'm still in a dead end job
I've never really had much idea, and career counselors have told me my results are unusual and they have no idea.
did work running a small artsy business and did OK,
worked as a trades assistant and a barman, did some gardening and metal/woodwork
IQ polled at 110, highly articulate, very black and white
outgoing and confident, polite but not amicable
happy with repetition and structure, unhappy with waiting
I have money behind me and I'm prepared to move or study as required.
>>16758968
Instead of seeing a job as an end, try seeing it as a means to achieve something. What do you want out of life? What do you value most? Is it independence and autonomy? Do you want a lot of free time? Do you want to travel? Do you want to make an impact on the world? Or do you just want a fancy three story home?
I would say start by finding out what you want in life, then find a bunch of careers that will put you on the path to achieving those things, then just pick the most interesting one you find and start busting your ass.
There's a whole lecture that talks about this. It's about "not following your passion" but the principles apply here. The dude did a bunch of case studies, and found that people who were passionate and happy with their work had a few common traits
>had a rare and valuable skill cultivated over the years
>skill was related to something they were genuinely interested in
>they used that skill as leverage to get the life they wanted
You don't need to find the ONE PASSION that speaks to your soul. Find something you've always enjoyed, and find a way to use your interest to cultivate a skill that you can use to get what you want in life
>>16759063
well that is a bit of a sticking point
All I want is money and power, I have no real interests or hobbies, no specific aspirations, I am content doing the same thing over and over again, eating the same meal seven days a week, given the choice I would live in a cement cube.
so from my point of view I just want to find something I'm good at, because I don't think I'l ever enjoy anything
it sounds a bit outlandish I grant, but it's true
>>16759083
You could be the next Warren Buffett. Make investments until you make it to the top 100 wealthiest men alive
hi there
in public places my bf has me sit on his lap when he has a boner, or brushes my hand against him on purpose. being a virgin this is awkward. not sure how to address it.
how can you have a bf if you're a virgin?
>>16758956
>not sure how to address it.
open your mouth, take a deep breath, and as air escapes your lungs use that air to form words with your lips, tongue and throat.
talking is usually the best way of communicating between humans but i suppose if you're not good at that you could also try writing.
>>16758982
funny that you used a pic from Jerremiah Johnson, since it has that scene where the two mountain men randomly run into eachother and have basically forgotten how to talk
>Be me
>19
>Dropped out of college
>No job
>About to get my ass kicked out of where i lie in cause i can't pay my rent
>No friends
>not even a single person to say hi or talk
>Virgin
>have not talked to a girl in 3 years
>Skinny as fuck
>can't even affor food
>Family hates me
>don't know anything about them since they kicked me out when i turned 18
>Too much of a pussy to kill myself
>I try to think that eventually things will get better, but everyday my hope dies a little bit.. so do i
What can i do? Is there a way to change my shitty life and get better or should i just kill myself?
>>16758952
Have you been actively searching for a job?
>>16758952
If you can backpack it to Richmond VA, you can crash with me, meng.
you should have mad this thread when you weren't about to get kicked out, what can I do for you now?
anyway standard boilerplate advice: join the military
I've spent about 1500+ dollars on comics, however, I'm trying to live a more minimalist lifestyle because I recently visited some family and realized that being a pack rat runs in our blood.
I don't know what to do, because most of these comics aren't exactly collectibles or anything. However, they are taking up a lot of space and I don't really read them.
What should I do?
go to a used book store or a junk store and see if you can get a couple hundred for the lot.
You got good taste in socks senpai.
separate the comics by story arcs and then sell the groups on ebay. don't expect too much money, just get what you can.
Hey /adv/
How do I convince my very severely depressed friend to start taking antidepressants? I've suggested the idea to her, but she dismisses it because she feels as if antidepressants aren't a "natural" form of happiness. I care a lot about her and I want her to be as happy as possible and I feel as if this is one of the few and only ways she can truly be happy. Thanks in advance
>>16758937
Why do you feel like that's her only option?
Does she have a shrink?
>>16758937
antidepressants are a lot like birth control. You might have to go through a few different types before you find what works for you.
also its not artificial happiness.
Depression can be caused be inherit problems with our brain, and shit like that. Its not unnatural to have physical laments that lead to a decline in mental health.
She's taking medicine to make this ailment help her be at her 100% health.
Mental health is still part of your health. You can physically %100 healthy, but if you're not mentally healthy, you're not wholly 100% healthy.
in other words, she would take flue medicine to cure a flu right? It's no different with anti-depressants.
you're not "naturally" going to cure the flu with your already existing antibodies. you need some new introduced.
she just needs a new fighting technique for her depression, and antidepressants will just be another form that can help.