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How do I stop getting borderline obsessed with people I'm interested in?
Every time I get close to a guy or start dating I get really into it and start feeling super close to them. Like I think about them all day every day and want to see them all the time. I have a life, things to do and my own friends but they're still always at the back of my head.
Also I've recently gotten close to someone new and our sexual tension is insane but we haven't really talked about it yet or brought it out in the open in that sense. Now I feel so anxious and I want to be with them all the time to escalate it and let him know how into him I am. How do I chill and take it easier so I wouldn't scare him away.
Does anyone even know what I mean?
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Uhh will you be my crazy gf?
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>>17112238
Do I really sound so crazy? ;_;
I'd like to think I'm just sincere. It's not that I'm actually obsessed but they are always on my mind and I miss them.
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>>17112246
I was just exaggerating ;_; you sound so sweet you see
First of all, i must say my english isn't so good, but i'll do my best to explain whats going on with my life.
I'm a computer science student, my parents pay for it, and i also study in another city, so they have to spent even more money. This semester i've picked up about 9 classes, a number slightly above the average here. The problem is i have no self-control at all...
I'm already disapproved in 6 out of 9 just because my absence. On these 3 i'm still doing i'm on the limit of attendance, and my grades aren't doing that good (i can't sit and study). I spent the whole day drinking and playing video-games, and when it comes to the morning of another day i do the same thing over and over. I'm feeling extremely sad and the only people i could talk or ask advices are here, on internet. I don't think about suicide because that would be a big betrayal to my parents, but all the time i feel like i have no future, i feel i'll become a homeless man. I also feel like everything around me will collapse and the world end, but it never gets real.
I think i know what i should do, which is stop drinking, studying more, but i can't swallow this pill.
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You need to stop drinking, it's fucking you up. Drinking worsens depression, making you miss classes, which in turn makes you more depressed. It's a viscous cycle. You have to save what you can of this semester or you'll truly be fucked
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I feel for you, I have finals monday and I'm really not prepared. I think the more important thing is to ask yourself why you're avoiding things? Clearly drinking and gaming is an escapism tactic. If it's too much pressure, then think of it in another way (this is what i did, it's hard to explain). Instead of thinking of the people you may or may not let down, think of yourself- what kind of person you want to be etc. but if it helps, at the end of the day they're paying because they want you to do something you enjoy- so i'm sure they wouldn't want you to be unhappy- you should look after yourself, and drinking all the time isn't good. It's daunting because you're seeing the mountain of things and getting overwhelmed- break it down! What can you do today that will be positive? Doesn't have to be loads of stuff, just something- even eating a healthy meal or whatever. And as for the work, you can't do it all, you're human, so just do what you can- and do it for you! Because you can, once you're done you can do what you want. Bit of a random ramble but i hope you get what i mean :')
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>>17112193
>Drinking worsens depression, making you miss classes, which in turn makes you more depressed
its exactly whats happening
>You have to save what you can of this semester or you'll truly be fucked
I'll try really hard to do it, anon.
>>17112224
> I think the more important thing is to ask yourself why you're avoiding things?
Every class had a unique reason.
in general, most of the classes i skipped had nothing to do directly with computer science, or they had a shitty teacher, or i overslept, or they were so hard i couldn't bother trying...
One of them i skipped because i couldn't finish a homework... (yeah, i'm that stupid)
Btw, thanks for your answer, anon. I really liked your post. Today i didn't bought any beer, so i'll take that as a starting point
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Background:
I am a guy
During school I had long hair (a little longer than shoulder-length) for several years.
On university I had it very short then long again. When I had it very short, I kind of liked but I had the feeling it didn't really fit my style: I was fat and where I come from, that kind of hairstyle is more of a fit guy hairstyle. (bullshit, now I know...)
Once I finished university, I kept it kind of medium length, at earlobe level, more or less. I never felt I looked GOOD, it just felt comfortable because that is what I was used to: a compromise between long hair and "adult lifestyle". Such a bullshit.
Fast foward several years, I worked out, lost weight and let my beard grow.
Last year I tried it very very short, I liked quite a bit, I felt good though I would say that it doesn't look handsome, it just looks cool (I feel badass with that hair).
Pic related, that is how I looked like but shorter beard. GF liked it.
Now, note the key moment: I had already tried this hairstyle, I had already liked, I just didn't keep it because I was a pussy controlled by stereotypes.
During the winter I let it grow back and, following GFs requests, I have been letting it grow. I mentioned to her a few times that I liked when my hair was very long and that someday I would let it grow again. I also mentioned that I like the "manbun" hairstyle. I just don't have it because people don't take guys with manbuns very seriously (you see the pattern?)
Now it is back at the former ear-length (GF likes it very much, says I look like some italian model, she overestimates my looks too much...) and I feel confused....
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cont...
In one hand, summer is coming and the very short hairstyle is easy to maintain and I feel good and more confident about it. I think about cutting it short at least once a week then I complain to the GF and she talks me out of doing it.
In the other hand, I feel like I am making the same mistake that I made when I didn't have it short years ago: feeling uncomfortable because if stereotypes instead of sticking to what I WANT to do.
On top of that, I live in a country where guys with long hair are very very uncommon (and frowned upon), which might be related to why the GF wants it...
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Bump...
Come on, let's make this a general hairstyle advice topic!
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Bruh
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How do I make silence not so awkward?
Although I am pretty good at talking and me and my gf talk a lot, I am afraid of when silence comes
What should I do concerning this?
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Silence is only awkward if you let it be. When you're in a relationship with someone that you're comfortable with, it's okay not to talk sometimes.
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>>17112077
It is awkward because I am afraid they find it awkward
I know it goes both ways
But how do I tackle this
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>>17112081
Ask her if it's awkward
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/adv/ anyone know how to get a job with no work experience, at first I wanted to try and get an internship or part time in an IT department or something but I'm having no luck. thinking I might just have to try and become a bartender for awhile. I need to work /adv/ I just don't know if I should keep holding out for something to give me useful experience or something to pay the bills.
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>>17112061
You apply for low skill entry level jobs, like fast food. You can't just get an internship at a skilled position when you have zero experience or education to back it up. Even bartenders need to be trained to know all of the drinks. You either go to a class for that, or you get hired on at a place that's willing to train you from nothing. Those places are rare.
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You'll need to take a bartender training class which can be quite expensive, or get hired as a barback at a restaurant/bar and after a while show interest in learning more. Though it's doubtful that you can even get the barback job without experience despite it being entry level lol.
When I was in your position I decided to go into security since I noticed there were a lot of listings for it on Craigslist. I got a license then applied with a couple of security agencies (Securitas and us security) and had a job within the week.
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>>17112061
You need to work as you said. Whether it's volunteering or doing any kind of work is better than nothing. The longer you're jobless the harder it's going to be. With volunteering you can also network and even get some references. As far as getting some kind of tech job, you're extremely limited without education plus job exp. Only thing remotely close you can start with (requires connections) is interning and data entry. Also do a lot of reading on w/e specific field in IT you're going for as well as the data you're required to know for the jobs you're attempting.
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So a girl I had been talking to a while ago did something I considered cheating. We were at the stage of almost dating. We skyped every night. She only lived about 25 minutes away so we couldn't always go do things since I had work. She told me she was afraid I would leave and find someone better.
Next thing I know, she is posting about a guy on Instagram whom she called a "cute and amazing guy", with a bunch of kissing emojis. I go to his profile to see her comment babe on one of his photos. Of course this bothered me, so I said something. She acted like I was overreacting and that there was nothing between them. I cut off contact from her but she still managed to talk to me. She told me she did in fact like him. I did not reply. Next thing I know it, she is trying to talk to me again going back to saying they never had anything.
I know she posted a lot of photos pertaining to how amazing he was.
Am I doing the right decision by pushing her out of my life even though she keeps wanting to come back?
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You're right and wrong. Skyping every night doesn't mean you're dating unless you specifically discussed being together and both acknowledge it. Also a cute and amazing guy that she calls babe isn't someone she feels nothing for, so you're right. Maybe he rejected her or something
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>>17112025
We did discuss getting together.
I remember her telling me that the guy didn't know what he wanted so they aren't dating so I don't need to worry.
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>>17112050
So she basically tried to get with him, but he rejected her, so she pretended like nothing happened? The fuck?
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How did you get over that person you really liked?
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Like someone else
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I haven't, it's the cause of my self loathing
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>>17111988
Move on. That's the only thing anyone can really tell you.
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does anyone know how to set it so you have a different laptop wallpaper each day on windows 7?
setting it to slideshow and change every 24 hours only changes it every 24 hours that the laptop is active, so how do i get one for each day of the week?
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>>17111987
Just dump her and look for another girl who's better. Get a job and move out from your parents' basement. Get help for social anxiety and depression if you can't make friends. Girls like guys with confidence. Stay in school and don't get too drunk or do drugs.
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>>17112004
IM NOT A FUCKING WEABOO YOU FUCKING HATERS I JUST FUCKING LIKE ANIME OK???!!!! STOP THIS FUCKING SPAM IM NOT PRETENDING TO BE BORN IN JAPAN I JUST FEEL LIKE JAPAN IS MY HOME BECAUSE AMERICA SUCKS (BTW PLEASE VOTE BERNIE OR ILL LEAVE THIS PLACE) SO REALLY SOMEONE NEEDS TO TELL YOU GUYS ONCE AND FOR ALL ITS NOT FUNNY TO ACCUSE ME OF BEING A WEABOO OR SOMETHING BECAUSE ITS JUST FALSE!!! IM AMERICAN AND NOT JAPANESE!!!! ALL I WANT IS TO LIVE THERE NOT BE JAPANESE OK I DONT GET WHATS WRONG WITH YOU if you wanna chat (girls only) add me on WarriorzNaruto303 on skype thx
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>>17111987
Try task scheduler.
Hello /adv/, I need some help.
I run my computer through safe mode and deleted something because it had something to do with some malware that was fucking with my browser.
After deleting the thing from regedit, the malware fucked off, but now I have a bit of a problem.
Apparently, my account that I've been using on this computer since Windows 10 released is now a "Built-In Administrator" account, and I can't do some things when it's like this.
How do I fix this and revert back to the normal Administrator account? Thanks.
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>>17111979
i dunno, maybe edit / create accounts?
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=windows+10+account+management
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>using windows 10
>ever
you asked for this anon
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>>17111999
I tried looking for stuff in the account management, but I couldn't find anything.
And I also can't pin shortcuts to the start menu anymore.
>>17112028
It's been good so far, I don't know why it's fucking up right now.
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I'm a 28 year old guy and never been on a date in my life. I have been going to therapy for a few months and trying to better myself. I own a house, have a college degree and a good job, I work out and I'm still a small guy but I'm not a skinny weak kid either. For the past few months I have been trying to dress and look better and try new things to meet new people. I have figured out that it's OK to share feelings and have personal conversations, and for the first time I think I am close enough to my friends that they would notice if I left. I think that by any objective metric I've improved myself to the point that I'm dateable.
I'm still having trouble with dating though. Never having done it, I'm not even sure how to start. I have been trying to talk to new people, and I've been in the online dating world for a while. Any time I talk to someone I don't know, I really have no interest in getting to know them. I guess it would be different if they were into it, but usually I'm just asking questions of someone and it feels more like an interview because I'm trying to learn about them and they don't seem to care or reciprocate. Have I just not actually found someone who is interested in me? Online dating seems like more of a chore than anything else, and even with all my efforts I have only had a few people even respond to my messages, and I have not been on an actual date.
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Meeting people is hard but at least youre making an effort
what about coworkers or your group of friends? anyone there who can help you meet someone who will at least go on a date?
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The thing with online dating is that it just feels artificial and mechanical. Ever tried joining an interest group to meet people? Or try volunteering? Basically form activities that open you up to human interaction?
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i'm 28 and never been on a date either but that's largely been by my own choice, since i've never cared for intimacy and i'm a bit asexual. anyway, op, i'm pretty good looking and have noticed that when females are attracted to me they'll enjoy talking about anything, act interested, etc and do more than the reluctant interview answers thing. you're probably running into girls who just don't feel much attraction to you, hence the disinterest. just keep trying if it's what you really want.
i'd like to say though that you've probably built up an unrealistic expectation of how glorious life is with a mate when in reality you may find you were better off alone all along. i realized this at a very young age, a decade ago in fact, and never looked back even once. my interests consume too much of my time and energy to leave room for getting involved in a relationship.
if your sex drive is the root cause of the problem, ie you're always horny and are tired of masturbating, you'd be better off working on learning how to neutralize it and restrain yourself rather than seeking a mate to express it with naturally. there's a tremendous clarity that comes with neutralizing your sex drive that most guys don't get to experience until they're at retirement age when it's far too late to act on it. most guys spend their whole lives chasing pussy, doing everything for it. successful businessmen know that avoiding this trap is essential to success. pic related.
Does anybody know what this could be? Had them for around a year and they're kind of painful
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isnt it just a callus?
picture makes it hard to tell
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>>17111905
They're crater like
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>>17111905
Looks like it. You'll have to burn and scrape it OP.
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> At a nerd con hotel room party
>In a committed relationship, partner didn't come with
> Gorgeous girl there, 10/10 resembles my first love, not even a nerd, just friends with the party host
> Night goes on; ppl getting trashed; I'm mostly sober out of combination of high alcohol tolerance, a promise not to drink too much, and being a creep who laughs at drunk ppl.
> Host and heavenly creature have been flirting hard all night but are now basically all over each other.
> Host is tons of fun but probably 3/10, good body, total butterface.
> Host flirting with me. Hard. Beautiful girl giving silent bedroom eyes, going with anything the host wants
> My hotel room is empty.
> I can't tell you how much I wanted to sleep with them. But I wound up leaving alone and faithful.
> Still thinking about it weeks later. What would you do?
>TL:DL in a relationship, offered threesome with butterface and out-of-your-league, WWYD?
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>>17111876
Yeah man. You totally missed out on being in a threesome.
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>participating in a threesome
>not even the cool kind
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Yes, you missed out on a threesome, but on the other hand you also missed out on being a cheating slut, so I think you've come out on top, really
I met a nice girl and we connected on a deep level. We wouldn't really talk about surface level things that much and the conversations were mostly deep, a lot of opening up was involved.
Things didn't work out and I just want to move on, any advice? I also can't shake the feeling that I won't meet someone who I connect like this on a deep level with again. A lot of the times when I talk with others on that level it just feels cheesy or forced, but with her it was natural.
Thanks
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Bump from my phone before I shower
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You don't really give us enough background info. Where did you neet? Do you have to see her every day? Do you work or study? What exactly did you like about her apart from being able to have "deep conversations"?
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>>17111830
I work and no I won't see her again unless she comes to visit me at work. I liked her because she was beautiful physically as well as her personality. She's a really good listener and is accepting and I always felt like she genuinely cared about what I was saying where when I talk to a lot of people it feels like they're not listening and they'll literally talk over you just so they can get their words in and feel validated. Never had that happen with her, she was very genuine
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So a prostitute has my phone and is blackmailing me saying if I don't pay her she'll "ruin my life".
I've had the phone deactivated but can she still use it in anyway?
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Are there lots of unfortunate pictures on your phone? Does it have contact info of all your friends and family?
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>>17111724
No pictures, has my contacts.
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>>17111715
>I've had the phone deactivated
Congratulations, you have done the best thing you could.
> use it in anyway?
You mean what? Phone number to deactivated SIM card? Nope.
Your other information in the phone like contacts, passwords, SMS, browser history?
Totally yes.
Only if you had iPhone, it has automatically option to delete everything on it in case of theft.
Other phones can do this too, but you have to set it up manually beforehand...
She will most likely call your mom, dad, boyfriend1, boyfriend2, girlfriend1, girlfriend2 and messing your social life a bit :-D
But hey, she is hooker. The chance of her being lazy / dumb to take full advantage of you is low.
Anonymous
Help a robot find love? 2016-05-05 12:50:16 Post No.17111707
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so pic related, itsa me.
>live in the Greatest of Britains
>24 turning 25 in Aug
>1.79m, 80kg, 10 -15% fat index.
>33.5k year salary, increasing quite regularly with bonus and quite a bit of holiday.
>Have a house, car, can cook keep myself clean, and fed on more than student meals.
So I think I'm doing well there, I want to move on to the next phase of life. Finding someone to make the journey through life with. Do i put all that on a card hand it out?
any Femanons have ideas.
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meet people. talk and have fun. meet more people. and someday you find someone, when you use the opportunity.
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>>17111707
Believe me man, with your looks, get social and you'll get girls.
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>>17111707
online dating.