Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1335. page

>>18458084
Fast forward to the other day: that same friend announces in the group chat that he and his gf eloped, and they want to have a little party to celebrate it. They're having the party on my birthday, the same day we had planned to drive down and celebrate. When I told my gf about it, she spilled the beans about the (failed) surprise party.

I'm honestly pretty butthurt about it. The fact that he knowingly planned his party on the exact same day my gf asked him to host my birthday tells me that he doesn't really give a shit about me. It also means I don't really get to celebrate my birthday with my friends, because I would be forced to throw a "competing" party, which is just too petty and passive agressive for me to even think about.

I know this all sounds pretty inconsequential. I'm just mostly hurt by the sentiment that my friends who I spent so much time with in my younger days no longer care about me.

On top of all this, they're supposed to come to my city for a concert and I had already told them they could stay at my place instead of getting a hotel. Now I feel hurt and spiteful but I can't really withdraw the offer...

So, my question is: am I just being selfish and whiny? Is it wrong for me to even care about this? Should I just be happy for my friend and forget about my silly birthday party? How would you feel in my shoes?

>>18458084
None of my friends even remember my birthday, so you are kind of whiny on that part, let them spend the night for the concert and if it bothers you so much then you and your gf find something else too do for your birthday and dont drive out there

>>18458090
Tbh he seems like a shitty friend. I've never had issues dropping people though.

Having even one child is a huge infringement on a womens health. If she has heart problems, then it could be really demanding for her. You should respect her decision, after all it's her who has to carry around the child for 9 months and then give birth.

Maybe just settle for two and see how it is? Mybe you don't even want more after that.

>>18458080
compromise at three but prepare to have less if her health is at risk.

>>18458080
2 kids is a great number. No need to try and overpopulate us further, and no need for such financial strains, really. Including the strain on her heart. More importantly... Weak heart? Childbirth is going to be terrifying for her. Seriously, respect her wishes.

It is a fly like creature that is big and has four human hands it is white and black and has black eyes

In the dreams with it the thing hides on my face i pick it off my face and it try's to fly away but i grab a hand and hold its boddy and rip the arm off it then gets pissed and tryes to attack me some times it succeeds and some times it doesnt and if it dosnt then i grab a second arm and try to throw it to a nother persone in the room im in and then i wake up

Are you under the age of 13? Of course it isn't real.

>>18458071
it's quite easy, put P in V.

problem sorted.

>>18458071
Talk about it with her, seriously. It won't make it easier for you, you'll still be nervous, but at least she knows and can adapt to it. If she expects you to be good in bed and know everything then you'll both be disapointed. If youre honest with her she can help you.

Another thing: don't do anything weird you saw in porn, for now. Just do missionary or doggy style.

>>18458122
>Talk about it with her, seriously

I would recommend against this.

No matter what she says about being "understanding" about it, you will almost certainly permanently have tainted her image of you in her eyes. You will become "that guy who was basically a 30 year old virgin" and turn your entire sex life with her into glorified pity sex.

I understand being entirely forthcoming with a partner and relationship not going anywhere if it's not built on being able to be comfortable with a partner, but there's just some things that are better to work on making a non-issue entirely on your own rather than raise them as issues to be overcome with a partner. This is one of them. She's a woman. This will lower her respect for you in irreparable ways, even if she isn't immediately aware of it.

Fake it till you make it, OP. I lost my virginity at 23 to a girl that I dated for a bit and who never knew that she was my first. I sucked at first, but got way better. Don't make a thing of this. It doesn't need to be.

getting a hooker won't turn you into a womanizer, and it will only serve you if you can turn it into a positive experience to build up confidence

>>18458068
>getting a hooker won't turn you into a womanizer
Not what I'm going for here at all

But fair enough

>>18458056
I honestly don't get why people make such a huge deal about virginity, wizart status, etc. I'm a dude but I seriously don't understand guys.
I'm a virgin and I'm okay with it. I don't think some whore deserves my time and money just for letting me put my dick in her vagina for a little while.
Why exactly do you need to have sex? If someone ever asks me if I'm a virgin I will just lie about it, say I had sex once a long time ago or something.
I'm probably asexual/demisexual though.
>inb4 meme words/made up orientations

Doesn't sound like a good life plan, she will be too old soon.
What you have to do is meet someone that looks like her in real life. A lot of people look like each other, I'm sure everyone has tons of people that look like them if you look hard enough, except for some special people with super rare faces but this is not the case if you mean the actress I mean.
Also looks don't define a relationship, besides she's famous, everything she does on a camera either in or out of a movie is probably fake or staged at some point because you can't be your true self and be genuine on a camera, ever.
If you want to do all those things because you are interested in them for OTHER reasons, that's okay though.

>>18458020

Easy bro. Just believe in yourself.

Failing that, have you considered stalking this poor unsuspecting woman?

I admire your enthusiasm, good luck

>>18457881
Join a self-defence sport like jijitsiu and learn about grounding yourself.

>>18457881
Watch some Dr Jordan Peterson
He's pretty red pilled and makes videos on things like knowing when and how to say no and other psychology shit

>>18457881
Ultimately you have to fuck a prostitute.
That will bring back your lost masculinity.

You beat the shit out of him, but he might come back for online-revenge if you haven't scared & beaten him properly

Demand justice (and money) in court

Fuck off

File a police report. He engaged in fraud.

>>18457855
The only people who do it are charismatic and handsome with people skills. If I learned anything in my entire life is that you can do any fucking job, without degree or anything. You can learn any-fucking-thing. All you gotta do is sell your image well enough, bullshit your way through any situation.

>>18457855
Eh, many start rich compared to the people where they travel. I think I could dick around in India or China for well over 10y if I cared to and I'm not anywhere near the world's top million.

And you get / organize your own odd jobs by having skills and charisma.

>>18457870
Wrong as usual. You also have to be reasonably smart. I know someone who was charismatic but not too bright, and it shuts the door on many jobs when they can't pass a basic competency test

>>18457855
OP, these people do it mainly through cushiony, but low paying, Internet based work, such as being freelance writers. It's a rough life, and your income is very volatile. Also, you never hear the stories about when they stop traveling and how extremely difficult it is to find a job and settle down

Try microdosing amphetamines/adderral

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>>18457975

>>18457842
Even when I practice I never did it wrong? Your grammar Is literally confusing me I'm not trying to attack you on it I just don't get the question. If you don't get anything wrong then why are you worrying? But if you are then it takes effort, and it seems like you're doing that. So I dont see an issue. Drugs don't make it better. It could make you even more paranoid then ever and you freeze up.

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le bump

God Ii remember those days of having no idea what to do with the whole dating.

Best advice I can give you is this: just be normal. NOT "be yourself," just be fucking normal.

The more I've talked with women over the years about their dating experiences and listened to their horror stories, the more I've realized that most guys suck at dating. You will legitimately be in the top 5% of daters just acting like a normal fucking person because the vast majority of dudes are basically incapable of just spending time with a woman, enjoying a shared activity and some good conversation with her without making some socially inappropriate attempt at getting her to sleep with them or force her into a relationship with them (e.g. trying to jump her bones on a first date, being needy and incessantly, etc.).

Just be...fucking...normal. Ask her if she'd like to get together some time. Think of something fun to do, and go in the spirit of nothing more than having a good time together. That's it. If you have a good time, keep in touch and see about doing it again. Any mutual feelings or attraction will develop entirely on their own and I can promise you she will be more attracted to your ability to just be a fun person to have in her company than anything else. If you do it right, she'll basically be slapping you in the face to kiss/date/sleep with her. There will be no need for questions of "Should I/shouldn't I? Is now the time?" or any of that shit.

tl;dr For now, just learn how to enjoy the company of a woman and don't force anything. The rest will fall into place. Godspeed.

>>18457789
Be so fucking good at something that they'll give you a honorary PhD

>>18457789
you can't.

go to college like everyone else

>>18457789
>Bill Gates: drop out
>Steve Jobs: drop out
Machine learning can be very valuable anon. Your best bet I'd to create a machine learning program of value, use it to make money or a company, and use that success as your resume. PhD's are a dime a dozen, while true innovators are very scare and will almost always be hired over the PhD

Try the "I have a bf"
OR
Set boundaries by -
No physical contact for a while (hugs and such)
Less compliments. And especially less compliments about their looks and such.
Hinting you're not attracted in THAT way. "Yeah you're cool, too bad you're not my type"

Maybe more "me" time than "we" time.

Also, don't be afraid to decline. Say "no, thank you", more importantly if you do feel uncomfortable.

>>18457781
>Maybe more "me" time than "we" time.
What does it mean?

I do always reject them firmly but nicely.

Feel free to ask any questions and/or have me elaborate. Advise appreciated immensely.

Also one other strange change is that he gets pissy with me over the littlest shit. He's always been hot-tempered. But lately it is 5x's worse.

All I can say is reading the bathroom bit creeped me the fuck out.

>>18457742
I don't know why, but Gerry pic made me laugh.

>>18457742
All you can do is disappear. If you have to stay away from your friends because she's there then tough shit. Be careful OP. I had crazy break into my house and point a gun in my face.

>>18457742

Disappear.

Be careful though; if you live in America, Crazy can be dangerous. (guns and shit)