Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2587. page

File: hqdefault.jpg (12KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 480x360px

dont do drugs

File: 20170206_232219.jpg (2MB, 2576x1932px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 2576x1932px

There's black soot going up my gas water heater and I'm extremely nervous. Anything I should do? I already turned the gas off to it. Also what exactly will turning the gas off effect? I'm completely new to this

File: 16425872_388781071455696_5002003966088583896_n.jpg (15KB, 400x300px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 400x300px

I need help with my oneitis, shes my friend also and its killing me. I want to cut contact and talk less to her and I did well for a while, she would say stuff i'd either say short things to end it or just kinda ignore it if it didn't need a response. I keep having to lie to myself and say don't talk to her she is talking to another guy or whatever. She messaged me a pic at like 1am of something, then I responsed at like 10pm and then she said something back, I said something then she just ignored it as read. I don't know why the fuck I never learn and just get stabbed like that over and over with her and feel like shit. How can I fix myself to get over this while still keeping her as a friend. I stopped hanging out with her and never text her first but once in a while I get baited into thinking she wants a convo then get ignored. She is in my friend group so this is kinda hard to get rid of her or these feelings and not let others know about it. It doesn't help that I am more lonely now because I can't hangout with her and my friends anymore so its not helping that much.

File: 1385940810631.jpg (16KB, 230x300px)

16KB, 230x300px

Sup /adv/,

I'm 23 years old and just a bit experienced in dating women. This night though, i had some girl asking me out for a prom.

Any average girl I would've said ok. This girl though, is a bit too >thicc for my liking and I know two guys I'm familiar with who have already fucked her. I said I'm not sure wether I'm capable of going(srsly might have an exam 1-2 days after prom) so I said I will message her tomorrow. The biggest problem is that if turn her down, some other girls in her frat might avoid me.

I know I fucked up by not turning her down immediately, but how do I fix this shit now? How can i turn this down politely?

File: 1000463-cowboy-bebop.jpg (198KB, 1920x1080px)

198KB, 1920x1080px

Is cheating and then mentally pulling off insane gymnastics to avoid facing that a common thing from women?

TLDR: EX GF with a past together, cheated an went from feeling like a bitch and being broken up, to claiming i cheated on her when i had sex outside of our relationship eventually giving up on that, and then claiming we were never exclusive when we clearly were, to getting mad and refusing to face the issue at all and projecting only anger when faced with the reality of what she has done.

Is this a common thing? Please god tell me its not, only one chick out of 3 has done this so far and i hope this isn't common.

The absolute denial pisses me off to no end.

File: 1484025371630.jpg (460KB, 1600x1200px) Image search: [Google]

460KB, 1600x1200px

Reasons
- Burnt out from lack of ambition (Reached boiling point after taking out first loan)
- Depression
- Shitty person overall

Pros
- Only $5000 in debt
- Won't rack up more debt
- Will have time to remove burn out and reassess my life.
- Won't have to waste 25 HOURS every week sitting on a train.
- Freedom, the major I chose has always been too difficult and uninteresting.

Cons
- 3 years of my life gone with nothing to show for it.
- Risky, dropping out =/= finding something to motivate me.
- 0 selling points without a degree(autistic, selfish, sheltered, slow in the head, 0 discipline)

Conclusions
- Drop out and halfheartedly try to find my first ever job while doing some soul searching.
- Stay in school despite being burnt out, fail classes due to falling asleep from long train rides, and waste more money wracking up debt for a future-less degree.
- Find some trade/vocational school that is close to idiot proof.
- Become a hikikomori neet.

Thoughts?

File: 1478306401209.png (762KB, 743x826px) Image search: [Google]

762KB, 743x826px

>20 yo, male, virgin
>student
>wide artistic tastes (writes poetry, music)
>well dressed
>does sports (martial arts, climbing, recently started powerlifting)
>intellectual (enjoys reading and philosophy)
>conversationalist
>well travelled
>psychonaut

Main problems:
>experiencing issues at university
>mood swings (highly energetic vs. depressed)
>working all these issues atm

I am running out of ideas here. I consider myself a well rounded individual, but i seem to not be 'attractive'. I have been told that i am an intensely interesting person to be around. But i cannot seem to attract girls and build 'chemistry'.

All the girls i end up trying to start smth turn out to be in relationships and older (usually mid-20s).

I know many people who i consider a lot more akward and have bigger issues than me, but are still more successful.

I have heard many times
>just wait, it is gonna come when you least expect it
but i find this disconcerting. Obviously there is an angle i am not seeing, where i could be improving.

Thanks.

File: 1453250188913.jpg (36KB, 843x843px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 843x843px

So how do you get any woman you like?
No like the one you want at the time you want.
I have had 5 gf, but aaaaaaaaaalways forget how to talk to anyone on how to flirt and that stuff. Help? Pls

File: e4a829e2-502a-42d4-898f-f3169442026b-bestSizeAvailable.png (289KB, 620x372px) Image search: [Google]

289KB, 620x372px

Matched with a handful of women on Tinder a few weeks ago.
First of the mentioned two is this 8/10 cutie that I knew from a few parties of mutual friends. I briefly spoke with her on Tinder, before asking her if she was busy that Saturday night.
She never got back to me, so by a few days later, and seeing her briefly around campus, I assumed that she just wasn't interested. Not a big deal. So I moved onto the next one. Really hit it off with this one girl from my hometown that is coming to my university in the fall. We're really getting along well, and she's already been flirty with me. Honestly could see something with this girl if all goes well. Smart, good humored, good head on her shoulders, shows interest and isn't afraid to tell you.

The 8/10 messaged me back after a week and a half, also on a Saturday, saying "lol I just saw this, but not today, I don't have anything."
How do I respond in a way that conveys "Sorry, I figured you weren't up to it, so I started talking to someone else and hit it off with them." without completely closing the door to the opportunity, say if in a month or so it doesn't work out with this current girl?
>Why are you worried about another girl if you like the current one?
Because I've been through the loop a few times of seeing a girl that seemed genuinely interested and then things didn't work out after a month. I'm trying to keep my bases covered.

File: 1392667836470.jpg (12KB, 500x333px)

12KB, 500x333px

I made a thread about my desire to set an account on a dating site a while back and someone suggested i try out eHarmony if i was serious about it.

Never used a dating site before or dated anyone in general, but had the guts to finally make one and upload a picture of me. I know you need membership to see other people's faces and message them but kind of contemplating the fees to use the services.

So far i haven't got that many girls close to where i live and when they are they're often far apart in age with me.

I am currently 19 years old and the matching system in my opinion does a good job at helping me meet gals but can't really get in the spirit to throw those 67 dollars down to use it for a month.

I would like to hear some experiences you people may have had with eHarmony or maybe some other dating sites and what i should look out for but most importantly if it is worth paying for or not.

You guys haven't let me down yet and i'm not gonna fish for attention by saying i have depression or that im worthless or some other stupid cringy shit because all in all i know who i am and i know what i'm looking for.

I know there are many fish in the sea but something tells me i want to stick to eHarmony since it seems to narrow down the kind of lady i want to get to know.

One disturbing thing i find is how little some girls write down for their profile. I personally have at least more than half the words on mine than them and i know it sounds like i purposely filled it out but i honestly just put down some of my interests, who i was looking for and who i am. That too much? most girls i see only have the bare minimum... why is that?

File: Amon-Amarth-Jomsviking.jpg (90KB, 700x418px) Image search: [Google]

90KB, 700x418px

My heart is bleeding right now /adv/. For 5 years I loved a woman and she didn't love me back.

Every year I would do something I thought that would make her like me or even love me. Every year she would turn me back.

I got a good job, she would turn me back. I got a nice car, she would turn me back. I improved my appearance, she would turn me back. I gained experience, she turned me back. I loved her so much but I couldn't see why she wouldn't like me.

Then I heard a song called "A dream that cannot be" and it made me realize that this whole time.. it was just me. All the shit I tried changing and it turns out that I was the monster pestering her this whole time. 5 years. The WHOLE fucking time. There is a lyric in the song that goes like this and this portion is sang by a female:

"You can't see that I am free. My life is mine, not yours. So leave me be."

Song is about unrequited love and it made me realize that this woman doesn't love me and probably won't love me. However, if this is true.. then my purpose is diluted. My life for the last 5 years was a wash.

I am actually in tears right now from this song because I just don't know anymore. What have I done? What do you do when for the last 5 years you have been haunting someone thinking you were just trying to get them to like you when in reality.. you were probably stressing them out?

I never thought of myself as a monster. I believed myself a man that would stand up to monstrous people or wicked people. I can't even look in the mirror anymore because things that I staunchly believed about myself are now a lie.

What do I do now? I was the monster the whole time.

File: rejection1.jpg (69KB, 600x453px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 600x453px

I used to think the cause of my pain and depression was that i was still in love with my ex who dumped me over one year ago, but i've come to realize that i'm not depressed because she left me, the root of my sadness is the REJECTION. She dumped me and it hurt my ego, making me feel inadequate and inferior as a man.

I think i've just made a huge progress here. In fact, i'm quite happier now that i've come to this realization.

But, what do i do now?

File: 1481332096826.jpg (85KB, 682x858px) Image search: [Google]

85KB, 682x858px

A few months ago, I began seeing a therapist due to having crying spells, thoughts of suicide, decreased appetite, etc.

A few months later I was diagnosed with Insomnia, Depression, and Anxiety. But, I refuse to take medicine out of fear that I don't actually have these and that these therapist only want to put me on these drugs to keep me coming back.

So, my first question is, is this a reasonable way of thinking?

My second dilemma is that after a few months, I told my girlfriend that I've been seeing a therapist for quite some times and that I had been diagnosed with these illnesses, I told her that I don't trust them and that I'm afraid of the above.

She's a little emotional (Think tumblr depression type) and wouldn't see a therapist for the life of her, but claims to have depression. But, she then became angry once I told her this. She proceeded to explain in an angry tone that I just ruined any chances of her seeing a therapist. I didn't mean to make her distrust therapy, I just thought it may be helpful to come to her with some of these fears thinking she'd be understanding. Ever since then she's been angry at me. I feel like she's definitely overreacting. Is she crazy or am I, and what do I do about both of these situations?

File: 1479722755608.jpg (49KB, 625x836px) Image search: [Google]

49KB, 625x836px

Idk how to explain this sensation, but it feels like I'm hyper aware of everything. Like the keys I'm pressing on my keyboard right now, the keys feel heavy to press down. Sounds also sound like "screams" or very loud.

I've had this happen before. It doesn't happen often. Is this some kind of mental disorder.

File: gravity.jpg (102KB, 600x435px) Image search: [Google]

102KB, 600x435px

So my roommate isn't very good with girls, and is now basically being cucked (a term I fucking hate, but I'm using it since it fits the situation), with his "girlfriend" actively talking to another guy, because she "can't choose."

This guy is the most sappy, sad sack dude in the world, and in the three years he's lived with me, has had his heart broken a million times since he gets all attached.

Should I pull him aside and tell him to get his shit together? I'm a lot better with girls than he is, and I think he needs someone who doesn't just cuddle him and tell him it will all be okay.

Or is it none of my business?