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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6699. page

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>finally meet qt 3.14 waifu
>perfect, beautiful, conservative, intelligent
>hit it off with her, things are going great
>with her 3 years, decide to finally get married
>lovely wedding, happy as I can be
>decide to have kids
>fuck 1 or 2 im going for 3 with her
>mfw the doctor tells me I'm infertile
>the only fucking way I'll ever have kids is to get her pregnant with ANOTHER MAN's sperm

How the fuck do I live with myself knowing that GOD HIMSELF has cucked me forever?
Fuck life. Fuck everything. Fuck this world.
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>36293589
try to get some from your brother or dad m8
>>
>>36293589
why are you infertile
>>
just adopt some kid from an orphange.

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does anyone have the urge to fuck every teenage girl they see?
55 posts and 12 images submitted.
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I only fuck teenage girls.
>>
fuck yes. 18 at its peak
>>
those freckles are fake

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/yinggan/ strikes again
533 posts and 79 images submitted.
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BRITFEEL UBER ALLES
>>
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No gays in yinggan
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Why do poor people always were polo and rolex?

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The body is just a life support system for the brain. Just hook up a machine to your jugular that
1) pumps the blood
2) oxygenates it in a manner that simulates how lungs work, or adds iron oxide directly if that would work.
3) a modified saline that adds nutrients and corrects salt and pH and other chemical levels
4) expels cellular waste products

This definitely doesn't seem like engineering problems we don't have solutions to yet in CURRENT_YEAR. And yet we don't think we should do a head-in-jar procedure before a trying a body-transplant?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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To what purpose? The brain still ages.

Who the fuck would want to be an demented head in a jar.
>>
>>36293625

TFW I say this and someone doesn't try to throw their morality at me and instead uses logical reasoning.
>>
>>36293552
Because living in a jar is shit tier quality of life.

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>too black for white girls
>too white for black girls
40 posts and 12 images submitted.
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>just the right amount of faggot to post here
>>
ITs all about personality.....if you are like most the people in here and get frozen up when a girl talks, you are doomed. Stop jerking off and do some pushups.
>>
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>>36293545
well, some white trash sluts enjoy being blacked because "fuck you daddy". And black girls are desperate for men, they will fuck anything.

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When did you start being a robot? As a kid? Is there even an age limit for being a robot you think?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Middle school when I got kicked out of my friend circle for making fun of my friend's father's beard and said it looked like Osama bin Laden's.
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>>36293443
Robots are born, not made. We dont become robots, we are doomed to live like this
>>
Honestly, not many adults still have friend from middle school.

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>tfw haven't spoken to anyone in two months
8 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>36293442
timestamp with proof or gtfo
>>
>tfw 30+ and live with parents
>haven't spoken to either in months
>>
>>36293462
How the fuck do I prove that?

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Hey fellow robots can you post a picture of the view from your window?
Also is my view comfy?
26 posts and 14 images submitted.
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it's a old one(mid2014) from my father apartment
that was a cool rainy night

i know it's no from my window but know ... hum...
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Window 1
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>>36293728

Window 2

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I want a gf.
I want to fuck. But I can't. Phimosis, obese.
I'm losing weight but it's gonna take two years because I'm morbidly obese and a surgery for loose skin after that. I'm streching the foreskin and that probably will also be fixed by the time I reach normal weight.

But. I can't. Stop. Thinking about sex!
I want to have sex now.
I want to touch a woman.
It's all I think about all the fucking time.
It's torment. I'm fucking suffering.
It feels like I'm missing the point of life.
I wish I could go back to not giving a fuck and enjoy my video games and watch my anime.
But I can't get these thoughts out of my mind!
Make it stop...
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
At least you have a good reason why you can't get laid.
Sure I'm a bit skinny but otherwhise I don't suffer any deformity, the fact that I don't get any is purely on me and that's a way worse thought to bear.
>>
>>36293337
>Phimosis, obese.
Both of those are easily fixable and entirely on you. I find this fascinating because I'm an ugly manlet and I can't fix that. You can fix your problems but you won't. Weird.
>>
>>36293629

This is all because my doc drastically increased the antidepressants. This shit is so complicated and weird how it works, it did a lot of good but it hurts so much at the same time! I'm living a fucking paradox!

I started diet. I contacted my friends I dropped contact with. I started showering and shaving. But... It made me want a gf and everything that comes with her. Some hours I feel suicidal because I don't have it. I feel absolutely terrible but I can't cry, no matter how hard I try. I can't enjoy my video games or anime. What I lived for and enjoyed.

I seriously don't get this shit. If I think about it logically, I'm better than I have been in years! Then why am I so sad and depressed? I don't have cancer or am homeless or a starving child in africa, you know, real fucking problems, I shouldn't even feel bad! But I do... I don't get it...

I mean, I don't have a gf and am a virgin.
So fucking what?
Why can't I accept it and move on?
Why does it hurt so much now?
I didn't care before.

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So this last week has been a weird one, let me tell you guys about it...

>Virgin boy who recently lost a substantial amount of weight in the last few months.
>Going to a party and staying over as an excuse to become a puddle of a human (get drunk/high)
>Person who is going with me is only going because I am so I feel like he's going to cling to my ass for the whole night.

Before the night I've been talking to another friend, who is a girl annd I really like but also don't want to do anything with due to her past experiences (bad ones) and the fact I haven't kissed anyone yet so feel like she'll have a lol about me being a sillywinky.

>Talk about getting drunk and high, sounds fun so I'm in.
>Boy at the start who was probably going to be on my buns the whole night got the wrong train so arrived early and was already socialising.
YesMan.mov
>Get in, say helo and proceed to chug 3 beers to boost confidence.
>Girl I like usually paces herself but caught me looking/being drunk and downed vodka and made fun of how much of a lightweight I am.

inb4 normie scum, this is the most socialising I've done in ages, also she was correct I am a lightweight.

>Chat with the people at the party, every 10 min or so we meet up and talk about how cookie cutter boring people are.
>This goes on for an hour and then she decides to get ready to smoke outside.
>I get my tin of like one or two spliffs and follow.
I'm either a wuss or really smart so I use the herbal stuff people use to get off tobacco with the weed instead of actual tobacco. ALSO lightweight with weed so 0.5-1g will send me away.

>We smoke and talk with some others and by the end of it we both can't walk straight.

Sorry will continue this in another post have to go make tea.

Also sorry if this story is shit it's basically me writing a diary entry to an audience.
9 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>36293277
Cont.

>She keeps the rest of her weed for later and I keep my second for later also.
>We wander back and the head of the house is complaining about how all the people that were smoking stink of weed.
>We keep walking down the road to avoid getting sniffed.
>The street felt like forever and we walked and talked and came back.
This is where i can't remember specifics so sorry xo.
>Mutually agree that the bedroom being used to store people bags and clothes is the least populated and we won't panic about us being high in there.
>Both lie on the floor and laugh at how fucked we both are.
>I get pillows and we lie and stare at the ceiling.
>End up just hugging on the floor enjoying each others company and jokes.
>Every time someone comes in I try my best to act sober. I'm not fooling anyone.
>I go get water and we both sit and talk more, she spills her's because she is Steven pied and I have to go on cleanup duty.

Kettle had been boiled for the last 5 mins sorry but i need my tea.

If anyone's reading this then thanks for listening to my ramble xo
>>
>>36293531
Cont. Hope someones enjoying this

>Talk about how boring people are and how we hate small talk and just wished people didn't seem so 2D.
>Have an ongoing joke about how we are basically the same person but she has a vagina and mental issues.

This joke stems from the fact that we steal each others saying and stupid little lines and sometimes we use them against each other. Oh and the mental health part is because... she has mental health.

>Says yea we are and just hugs me and we both fall back into the pillows.
>Legs are twisted together and facing each other.

MyGodShesPretty.IOU
Because I'm auts we just keep doing this, IDK if I missed a moment or whatever but she didn't initiate anything so I'm hoping I didn't miss out.

There's more story but this is the first part of advice I need:
DID I FUCK UP BOIS
>>
==FUCKING WORTHLESS NORMALFAGS STOP LARPING IN MY BOARD REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE==
==I FUCKING HATE YOU==
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What do you guys think of my butt?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36293267
your neck roll, I take it?
>>
>>36293289
OK you got me. It's really my vagina. I'm an overweight fembot
>>
>>36293267
It looks like a fold when i lose my hand

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>God made Jesus come back from the dead giving him a second chance at life
>he didn't even give you one
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36293171
I dont get it, you're living right now...
>>
>>36293171
Well if you kill yourself
Maybe god will also give a second chance at life
>>
>>36293171
haha yea man fuck god, he's the reason you're a stupid neckbeard faggot XD

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What does it feel like to plant your seed inside a high test woman?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36293167
What's a high test woman?
>>
>>36293167
dunno, but what's her last name and has she done any b/g?
>>
>>36293167
Gimme ones number and I'll tell you.

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I'm writing an argumentative paper for my Women's Studies (WOST) class at University. I'm on one of those full ride scholarships for being poor so I figured I'd minor in WOST as a meme because I thought I could handle the cancer. Well I can't but now I need to write an argumentative paper so I've decided to do it on "Feminism's real hidden enemy: The latent social network of /r9k/."

Here are the questions, say whatever pleases you buds:

Question 1: What is your opinion on women as a whole?

Question 2: How did you come to find /r9k/?

Question 3: Have you had a girlfriend before?

Question 4: Can you see yourself honestly killing a non-malicious woman for any reason?

Question 5: What is your opinion on shooters like Elliot Rodger and Dylan Roof?
67 posts and 16 images submitted.
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>>36293094
>Question 1: What is your opinion on women as a whole?
Women as a whole are incredibly ignorant of their own hypocrisies. I believe that we on /r9k/ understand them better than they understand themselves.
>Question 2: How did you come to find /r9k/?
Migrated from /b/ after about 3 years. If you're asking if I specifically came to /r9k/ because I was looking for women hate sites, then no, but I have gone looking for those sites before, such as http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/
>Question 3: Have you had a girlfriend before?
Yes, but I have not had sex with a woman. It doesn't bother me though and it does not niggle in the back of my mind.
>Question 4: Can you see yourself honestly killing a non-malicious woman for any reason?
No, I don't want to go to jail. If jail wasn't a concern then I would love to kill lots of women. I won't though.
>Question 5: What is your opinion on shooters like Elliot Rodger and Dylan Roo
Heroes, I empathise with them sincerely.
>>
no one here wants to do your homework for you, fag
>>
>Question 1: What is your opinion on women as a whole?
Overly pampered and overprivileged yet fail to see it.

>Question 2: How did you come to find /r9k/?
Was here since the board was made

>Question 3: Have you had a girlfriend before?
Yes

>Question 4: Can you see yourself honestly killing a non-malicious woman for any reason?
No

>Question 5: What is your opinion on shooters like Elliot Rodger and Dylan Roof?
If they had gotten some affection they wouldn't have gone on a killing spree.

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i just realized that i've never actually had a crush on a girl i've met in real life.

anyone else know this feel?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36292989
Had one a long time ago when I was like 14 but not since then.
Are we anime gay?
>>
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>>36292989
same
bretty awks when a gril have the hots for me tho
>>
>>36292989
I stopped having crushes in 4th grade, after that i have just ignored gurls

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