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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6704. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

Who gets the most artsy girls? Chad or Brad and why?
7 posts and 1 images submitted.

Brad. He's more open to it.
brad because they like the abuse. i am an alpha female and i usually date charismatic fat guys or chads. brad and stephanie are the ones that break up and get together and tip toe around her histrionic personality disorder and so on. artsy girls like drama, stacys and actual normal girls like kindness of which brad and robots usually lack.
Artsy girls start of dating Stevens, only to sooner than later realize they're pathetic and that they have better options. After that they date Brads, until Brad starts to age and slowly turns into a Micheal. After all is said and done, they eventually marry Chad, living as boring suburban housewives living a life of comfort for the remainder of their lives.

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how do/did you guys deal with academic pressure?
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
I didn't and grew small grey hairs between 6-7th grade and still grow more to this day kill me
oh no, that doesn't sound pleasant
>tfw turning 20 and already have grey beard hairs

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>fucked my ass with a toothbrush
7 posts and 3 images submitted.
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What end did you use, Anon?
Was it electric or manual?
i used the end u hold dummy

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>out for a walk by yourself
>see this
>"come suck my dick faggot or i'll beat you up"
>what do?
15 posts and 3 images submitted.
Get to suckin that dick.
walk away. if they follow me I'll turn around and stab them.
Beat him up

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Non-whites, Traps, & Gays Are Not Robots.
11 posts and 6 images submitted.
Is Mixed considered non-white?
if you're mixed with non-white then yeah
But Elliot Rodger was a robot and he was mixed.
Then again he was also just a chad with robot's mental health

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Do you celebrate Easter, /r9k/?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
why was smug toad crucified?
I don't celebrate shit
good for you, you sad edgy little man

Hoarding is for idiots who don't realize that they're mortal.

When you'll have your own place and have to do everything mommy and daddy did for you your whole life yourself you'll realize how modern life can be complicated and how having too many possessions can drive you mad.
25 posts and 7 images submitted.
"Minimize" the number of threads you post!!!!
I like living like this, it's so much more practical and relaxing.
Where do you put your clothes? Where's the PC or laptop you used to make this thread? I hope you don't use a laptop while lying in bed because that's terrible for your body

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I have a date in 7 hours. I'll drink. Should I take some benzos too? Got lorazepam, which is half as strong as xanax.
Mixed them the other night (2 mgs and 4 or 5 cans of beer) and I was pretty happy, finding everything I read to be amusing, feeling more social and shit. Re-read some pages of a novel and looked at some Giotto paintings on the Internet. I fall asleep quite easily once I got into bed tho.
Dubs decide what should I do.
29 posts and 6 images submitted.
It might not be a bad idea, just for the love of god make sure it's a dosage you've had before and are comfortable with

I know that's common sense but this is r9k
This, really.
I've read that benzos are a lot more potent with alcohol, so just don't take too much and black out or act a fool.
It's weird because one night Itook wine with 2.5 mg of valium and it fucked me up bad, but the beer and lorazepam combination was real comfy. This last time I was on my own at home tho, so maybe the lack of social contact kept me from fully realizing how was it hitting me.

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Reminder that if you use the terms red pill/ blue pill you're a fedora tipping retard that that takes shit concepts from a shit movie.
17 posts and 2 images submitted.
You just used the terms red pill/ blue pill so you're a fedora tipping retard that that takes shit concepts from a shit movie.
Wow man that's a fucking good one.
well well well, if we dont have two fedora tipping retards that take shit concepts form shit movies.

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Have you ever hooked up with somebody you met on 4chan? How did it go?

I met up with a robot a few years ago in one of the old omegle9k threads. He was a pretty much a stereotypical robot: lewdposter, weeaboo, virgin, NEET, kinda chubby, but he was pretty cute and actually took care of himself.

>Go to his place when his parents are out of town
>Watch hentai in his room while jerking eachother off
>Start making out, hes a shitty kisser but its fine
>He sucks my dick for a bit before he gets naked and bends over
>He started going to the gym pretty recently and squatting so his ass is actually pretty nice
>Fuck him doggy for a while, hes making dumb anime moans which almost kills my boner
>Pull out and nut over his ass
>Take a break and play some smash for a bit. Later he confesses he's always wanted to get fucked while playing vidya.
>Let him ride me while he plays persona
>Nut inside him

6/10 it was okay. Would have done it again but he stopped responding to my emails afterwards.
267 posts and 61 images submitted.
>meet not online
>ofc they don't live in florida
>he's going to take the train to meet me
>get nervous
>don't want to lose virginity to stranger online anymore
>virgin grill memes get to my head
>back out last minute

not really a hook up story, but the closest I've gotten
meet bot online, not not

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Story is fake, no bots ever live in Florida.

Source: Live in Florida. :(

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Ask somebody with a rich Chinese gf anything

She left pic related in my car last night. This thing is like $1200 according to my research
13 posts and 3 images submitted.
You act like a money obsessed female
Counterfeit. Probably costs $10 on a flea market.

Congrats anon, you played yourself.

Nice table btw, must costs like $20 on ikea. Really expensive.
I just find it unconscionable to spend $1200 on a 7"x4" piece of leather

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>meet cutie at a lecture
>she starts talking to me
>asks for my kikebook
>stalk her, she lives with her bf
>whatever, maybe she just wants a friend
>chat with her sometimes, she's nice
>one day, asks me to go to a party
>"hey anon, there are some friends I want to introduce you to"

Why? Why is this happening? Is she secretly laughing behind my back? Or could it be that she actually thought I'm a good person, told me about her friends and one of them became interested?

I don't know what to do. I never go to parties because I get anxious as fuck, and when I do, I just drink a lot and dance like a retard. I never actually talk to people other than a couple of friends that go with me to these parties. The party is in a couple of weeks, and while I kinda want to go, I'm too fucking scared to.
32 posts and 4 images submitted.
*told her friends about me
In all likelihood she has an ugly friend. So she's been searching for a "guy on her level". This ugly friend is the girl she wants you to meet. She's trying to play matchmaker and feel good about herself. All you are to her is a real life SIMS character.
I'm pretty ugly myself, so an ugly girl is probably all I can do. Could she really be setting me up with one of her friends? I thought shit like that only happened on movies.

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In this thread , we list positive things we like about ourselves
30 posts and 3 images submitted.
i have pouty lips feelsgoodman
only sucks when people call them dick sucking lips
i shower almost daily
I have good grades and I'm normie socially speaking

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Is streching really going to fix it? I managed to pull it back flaccid and semi-erect but not erect. Even flaccid, progress, if happening, is weird. I still have to do it slowly at first cause it hurts then once I do it I can move it up and down fast. Then after a few hours, same shit, have to go a bit slow because it hurts at first. I have a short frenulum too.

I'm not going to chop off my fucking foreskin.
Fuck jews and muslims.
I don't want a mutilated dick.
You are fucking born with it, there must be a fucking reason it exists. I bet it has nerves and you feel more pleasure or your cock doesn't become dry as a desert.
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
I had phimosis so I went and got surgery to fix it. They didn't cut my foreskin off, just opened it up by slicing down the sides.
I got phimosis
hasn't really caused me any problems aside from being de-sensitized
I remember when I was a kid I had phimosis and this nurse forcibly pulled my foreskin back. Hurt like a bitch and that stopped me from trying until I was a teenager. Jacking off fixed it by the time I was 15 though

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>tfw had no other choice but to friend zone an attractive, smart and confident guy because he was under 6ft

Any other fembot know this feel? ;_;
27 posts and 7 images submitted.
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Is that supposed to be a bait thread, anon?
Iktf sis. Met a guy who's studying to be a lawyer, really attractive (looked like Jon Snow), but he was like 5'10. ugh..
This is bait

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