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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5046. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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>be me
>today is the big prom
>finally finishing this piece of shit called high school
>single,, lonley and baiscaly a robot but got some friends that are normies
>i hate taking photos
>i hate dancing
>i hate emotional shit
>it will be ok to drink only after 4 hours

wat do
11 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
fuck off
robots don't go to prom
>>
>>37284067
i am obligated to go to the prom
>>
>>37284080
Only by normalfag social standards. The school can't force you to go.

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http://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Girlfriend-When-You're-Autistic

kek
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>37283909
No thanks.

I'm already homo-insured. Guaranteed cover for female advances.
>>
>>37283909
Pretty sure one of the steps is "be yourself". It's not a useful guide either because I think another step if "be upfront about your autism and tell them you may do weird things and have them let you know when you are doing weird things"
>>
okay now how do i get a gf as a manlet

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>kv
>a fat girl fell in love with me
what should i do

she is not fat at all, she is chubby and short and her face is average
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>37283833
uhm, impregnate her, marry her and live a happy life?
>>
>>37283833

Date her.

If you don't, you'll spend the rest of your life wondering what could've been. People like us don't get these opportunities often (if at all)...act on it.
>>
>>37283833
Post a pic. We can't tell you what to do without looking at her

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>tfw skelly
>every time I eat the fat just goes around my hips and ass

HOW DO I GET MY UPPER BODY TO GAIN FAT?

Don't tell me to lift please, I just want a normal weight
17 posts and 3 images submitted.
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P-post dat f-f-fat asssss
>>
>>37283755
lets see ur butte
>>
>>37283755
Ur low t brah. Get to the doc and ask for a blood test.

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This Is An Age Poll. Take The Poll And Get An Idea As To The Average Age Of /r9k/ Users.

http://www.strawpoll.me/13045396
14 posts and 8 images submitted.
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>be 34
>poll stops at 24
>>
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>>37283820
(OP) here. I'm the same age mate

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyWmSnuS850
>>
>>37283743
sauce`(origiante ofc)?

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I have a girlfriend and have lots of sex these days. Does this mean I am no longer allowed to browse the sacred threads of r9k?
13 posts and 8 images submitted.
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>>37283289
What a brag this was. Wew.
>>
>>37283301
I just feel this board is for elliot rogers and wizards. Don't think I belong on here now that i'm a certified CHAD.
>>
you should block 4chan from all of your devices too

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WTF i LOVE police now

*unzips boner*
20 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
>>37283064
The guy with the mustache is hot! But that other guy isn't. He's like Italian or something.
>>
>weird sadomasochist D/s undertones
>"men" who look like their parents were cousins
>unnecessary exclamation points
>"look at what i'd fuck i'm such a slut XD" posing
unintentionally great thread
>>
>>37283250
>he's still trying to suppress his naturally inherent bisexuality
You don't have to be a faggy flame dude. But you can at least admit you find some men attractive and that you want to suck a dick and stuff at least once

>25 degrees outside
>too warm in my room decide to go up to asda and buy a fan
>Halfway there I see couples holding hands, kids having fun and people out with their friends
>Start to tear up a bit
>Realise I never had or never will have any of this
>Go back home worse than I went out

Anyone else here hate summer ?
12 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>37283006
Did you at least get the fan?

Seriously nonny I'm on the edge of my seat to hear the conclusion to this
>>
>>37283006
Quit being a sorry sack of shit. If you don't like the way your life is going do something to change it.

>>37284225
>my
>fucking
>sides
>>
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>>37283006
its only this hot for a week then the rest of summer is overcast

let the normies get their week of fun

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ITT: We post our fidget spinner
11 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>37282888
My cousins have these meme spinners, they're like 8 and 10 years old. Should I be concerned?
>>
>>37282919
No, fidget spinners is cool.
>>
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Here is my fidget spinner

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How do I get a huge hairless bearmode bf?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Can you please post more gifs/pics like this one, OP? Don't hold out on me; I know you have more.
>>
>>37282875
Welcome back anon for round 2
>>
wtf is this lmfao
why did u post a picture of a dude wearing bikinis?

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What is it like to be white and make sweet love with a cute darkskin black girl?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>37282801
Thats one of that nice 2000 dollars sexbots ? I saw them on ebay.
>>
>>37283052
Nah I'm pretty sure this is a real niggeress.
>>
>>37283052

>>37275573
>>>/pol/127096343

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Who here 9/10 turbo chad but still cant get a gf?

Life is so cruel
16 posts and 6 images submitted.
>>
Why has this guy become a meme again?
>>
>>37282796
what do you mean?

>origio
>>
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>>37282766
GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT NOW
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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So you're on the changing room after a hard workout session, just about to enter the showers.

This guy comes in and looks at you, and smirking he touches the side of the device on his head.

What do you do /r9k/?
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
sex him then steal his glasses
>>
>>37282749
Sue him for stealing my likeness after i snap a phot back for evidence.
>inb4 he runs
I'm doing a cardio heavy routine to see if i can do a marathon. Beanpole looks like he'll be winded before he hits the main lobby.
>>
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>>37282749
I fuckin' take his silicon valley virgin ass and snap him like a damn twig.

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What caused me to fall in love with a meth-addicted escort with a 5 year old daughter and an overbearing ex that is still very much in her life?
20 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
Same thing that got me involved with a heroin addicted vagrant who was staying with her mom and working with me over the winter who's ex(not so ex) was still in contact with her while in another state

It's called thinking with your dick .

Get the fuck out of that asap
>>
>>37282696
It's already over. I just can't get over her and I can't get my head around why I can't let it go. There are so many things that I hate about her but I just want to be with her.
>>
>>37282696
Also to add I'm assuming you have some self serving motive where you feel the need to be a shining beacon of light to her and save her from lying in the bed she made.

She doesn't care about you, she doesn't wanna change , you can't save her, she's gonna leave you for the ex.

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It is scientifically impossible to kill yourself.

Even if you try, you will always be in a reality where the suicide didn't work or kill you.

Let that sink in
13 posts and 1 images submitted.
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It's a thought experiment, not a scientific fact because your death isn't just a single quantum event but rather something that exists on a classical, irreversible scale.
>>
>>37282493
>It is scientifically impossible to kill yourself.
Wrong. It's effectively a riff on Schrodingers cat, so it's not that you can't kill yourself, it's under particular interpretation of QM if your suicide is triggered by a quantum event, then you shouldn't be able to die (or more accurately reality will branch off and you'll continue to live in one of those branches)
>>
>buy lottery ticket
>commit to killing yourself if you don't win
>become millionaire


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