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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2586. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

Black people shouldn't be allowed to live.
43 posts and 16 images submitted.
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>>38446534
You are 100 percent correct, OP.
>>
Fuck that, I can't live without Morgan Freeman. WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO LIVE FOR ANON???
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>when /pol/ shitposts on /r9k/, the blackest board on all of 4chan

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Ask someone who just joined a frat anything.
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Which fraternity?
>>
top house? If not, any robot can join it
>>
How the hell did you join a frat in mid-July?

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>he constantly imagines life together with the only girls he knew that happnd to be from his school
>even after 5 years
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38446445
there was this girl from high school art class that probably noticed me glancing in her direction far too often. she tried to be my friend though, but i was too scared of having friends because i felt i was too broken and pathetic. we talked for a while and she wanted to take me out to places and hang out. im absolutely terrified of the thought but at the same time im so fucking happy. i cut contact and avoid at all costs. i am what i am because i do it to myself.
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>>38446445
>5 years

Are you even trying? 8 years here, bitch broly don't even remember I ever existed, and I keep stalking like some starved doge.
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>>38446562
dude 9 years here kid

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I don't wanna grow up
51 posts and 11 images submitted.
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>>38446406
I want to grow up now, I hate waiting.
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>>38446406
https://youtu.be/VJJ-ZLdrTwY
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>>38446406
>bimbo'ed
a good doujin my dude

Would anyone here actually be opposed to a chestlet holocaust? If we killed off all the chestlets, every man would have the option of being with a titcow. Moreover, titcows would no longer feel special, and their standards for men wouldn't be as high as they are today. There would also be plenty more milk for our babies, and the outrageous prices for larger bra sizes would be normalized. Men would be happier and women would be more confident; there's literally no downsides to this idea.
12 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>38446383
Removing DFC doesn't magically create more titcows. There would just be a shortage of women meaning more men are screwed as well.
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>>38446383
I don't want to kill anyone. I want a legal hormone therapy program for turning girls into milky titcows
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>>38446516

We may have a shortage of woman for a generation or two, but it also means we'd eliminate the chestlet gene from our population. We would be able to selectively breed this horrible body deformation from existence.

Anyway, can someone start a petition on change.org to eliminate chestlets from our gene pool? Im sure it would not pass at first, but at least we'd start a discussion on this important topic.

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>tfw live in California
>tfw all the single girls on 4chan live in Florida, NY, Canada, or Europe

I just want a 4chan gf who I don't need airline tickets to meet, is that so much to ask?
22 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Then move out of normiefornia, cuck.
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>>38446349
>I just want a 4chan gf who I don't need airline tickets to meet, is that so much to ask?
lel that is indeed to much to ask
>>
Are you illiterate? Cali is swarming with fembots. Almost all the fembots are in the US. Oh poor you.

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>tfw no yandere gf / bf

steamcommunity.com/id/Deadmoko
11 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>38446323
AHAHAHAHA IS THAT YOUR ACCOUNT MAN? LMAO HE HAS THE VIRGIN STEAM ACCOUNT
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Has anyone seen spooks in the past year?
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>>38446388
Yeah, he's eating ass in the UK.

ayy who /tinypenis/ here?
9 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>38446291
How much pussy that guy had in life to the point two girls touching his dick doesn't make it instantly rock hard?
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>>38446317
that's how big he is rock hard
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>>38446291
>there are people out here who make and edit these captions 24/7

I would call people with a humiliation fetish cucks, but I think that would be a compliment to them.

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>tell my gf not to buy a 10 thousand dollar car from a dealer
>just tell her you can find the same car online for a fraction of the price
>she begs me and wont shut up to buy the car
>end up buying the car
>after 2 weeks car starts to have transmission issues
>oh well take it back to dealer
>takes 3 days in a shop to fix
>while car is being fixed
>im driving her to work
>we drive by a car for sale on the side of the road
>same condition as the one my GF bought
>price on it $3,200
>cringe internally
>tell her

>SHE SAYS SHE NEVER WANTED THE CAR AND I MADE HER BUY IT

>my brain cant register this
>i vividly remember i was the one who said not to buy the car
>i vividly remember trying to ward her off from buying the car
>i vividly remember her wanting to buy a car FOR HER SELF SINCE I ALREADY HAVE A CAR
>my brain short circuits
>i am half dead now
>suffering from brain damage
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38446246
Yeah that's called gaslighting and its technically a type of spousal abuse.
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>>38446246
Ur girls shit pal shoulda waited and got a better one.
>>
Hold this over her head any time she makes a significant purchase.

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who /nightlifting/ ? i go to the gym at night because i'm ashamed of my skelly weakling body. i hope to have chad body one day.
18 posts and 3 images submitted.
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whos at a gym at night?
and what time is a night for you?
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>>38446214
Gotta bulk before you get muscles senpai. If you're a skelly lifting will do jack shit for you. Eat a lot and lift a lot.
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>>38446214
I used to do the same thing so I could swim without anyone around. I liked that I didn't have to worry about being a fat ass in a bathing suit. Good times.

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Met a dude on Craigslist who wants me to suck his GF's feet. Pic related is her and we're supposed to meet up tomorrow. Should I go through with it /r9k/? Also general foot friends thread I guess.
15 posts and 1 images submitted.
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You're probably going to get robbed.
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>>38446242
It's free/no money involved/not bringing any money
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idk man she looks kinda big

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Where do you go to look for career advice? 4chan/reddit/etc. isn't helpful. If I don't figure out something soon, I'm going to have to kill myself.
23 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>38446113

What are your interests? I'd pick a field that interests me
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>>38446113
I personally just flipped through the course catalog at my local community college until I found something that lookes good. Maybe that will help.
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>>38446113
I just went for what my college adviser suggested.

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HAHAHA RUMP BTFO HAHAHA
15 posts and 4 images submitted.
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Boards dot Four chan dot org slash pol slash
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BRUMPFA DUMB DUMBS BTFO
HOW WILL THEY EVER RECOVER
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>>38446046
Not an argument,lord of shit.

>try to get GF
>fail
>give and and decide to go full weeb
>starts to cosplay
>in a event one day doing an Anbu member version of naruto (pic related)
>alone because no friends
>cosplay competition starts
>i'm in line, behind the most beautiful girl i've ever seen
>she's cosplaying
>whatever, i have relinquished my carnal desires
>ignores
>event ends
>go home

3 days later

>random call on my phone
>pick up
>"y-yes?"
>"FINALLY! I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TALK TO YOU FOR A FUCKLOAD OF TIME!"
>"wha?"
>"you cosplayed anbu member naruto at that anime event right?"
>"my friend was really into you, so i set out to work my part-time cupid job!"
>"anyway, if you're free tomorrow she'd love to meet up"
>agrees because too shocked to think straight
>arrive at meet up place
>both there
>her friend (the one who called me) is a total fucking slut
>but the girl
>that girl was something else
>everytime i looked into her eyes i got lost, hypnotized by her beauty
>slut friend says "well i'll leave you 2 to it now, don't go too crazy!"
>we just stare as she runs off
>thank god my lust pushed me enough to surpass my autism and talk to her
>discouver she's not only my perfect girl in body, but in hobbies and interests
>we're both KHHV 22yo
>proceed to have a date of sorts
>felt like i knew her for years
>day ends, slut comes to pick her up
>they go away, but she turns to me one more time and shouts
>"ANON! TODAY WAS REALLY FUN! LETS GO OUT AGAIN SOMETIME!"
>that fucking smile
>fell for the love meme


what the fuck lads, i thought women were supposed to be heartless creatures here only to torment men
a-am i chad?
15 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>38446011
this is my dream, I got to make this kind of thing happen to me some how
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There's no way this story is real.
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>>38446068
i'm in shock anon, i fucking know how bullshit it sounds but jesus fucking christ
can i really be happy? is this fucking serious?
i don't know how to react to this

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I want to be normal.
I never think about sex. It just doesn't cross my mind. The thought even somewhat scares me if I try really hard to imagine it happening.
I want to fall in love with someone and make him happy. I want to get married and have a family. I know these are silly and unambitious dreams, but they're mine.
I'm 22 and still a virgin who's never dated, even though I'm in college. I can tell that objectively I'm pretty attractive, and also based upon circumstantial evidence. I just don't know what is wrong with my brain in this regard. I want to try fixing it.
I think I want to try masturbating for the first time tonight.
I don't know how to touch myself. I feel really uncomfortable with the idea of watching a porn to learn. Does someone here know how to make it feel good when you touch yourself?
It hurts when I touch my clit. I've tried licking my fingers and just rubbing around, and that was better. But I don't know what else to do.
I have butterflies right now and I've gotten flushed in my face and now all the way across my arms.
What is wrong with me?
16 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Just buy a vibrator and relax, you don't have to penetrate

If you get anxious and tense up it won't be fun
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>>38445955

>Femanon
>still a virgin

I'll allow it. Proceed.
>>
Take it slow, there's no need to rush. You can be as gentle and cautious as you want while you figure out what works for you and what doesn't.

Don't watch pornography to learn, that's all about what looks good for the camera and not what feels good.


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