Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5446. page

Post pic or suck dick op

don't go to privatesextapes.com
just don't
your heart will sink

>>17127159
>I'm quite an attractive guy and go out fairly often
>but when it comes to dating or pulling I just haven't had any success.
It's either A or B, dude. Attractiveness is not measured in looks. I know it's difficult to accept this, but the sooner you do, the further you'll be removed from the core demographics of /adv/ in terms if experience and understanding of women.
Protip: Learn how to hold a conversation like a man.

>I feel like I'll never see the hunger in the eyes of a young woman again, if you get me?
No, I don't get you. Very few things prevents men in their 30s and 40s to sleep with women in their early twenties.

>>17127151
You've gotta dump her. She's being unreasonable even when you make your schedule perfectly clear.

First hand source here:
My gf and I always tell each other when we can and can't hang out. The most we will ever say is "sucks you have to work", "that's lame asf", etc.

Get a woman who is in control of her emotions and understands that the world doesn't revolve around them.

>>17127163
Not this.

But he has a point, so just teach her how to be in control of her emotions. You did good OP, don't answer her calls or texts for a few days (3-5). Get it out of your system. Then go back to her acting like nothing happened, treat her as nice as ever. Repeat every time she behaves like this. Just tell her you're not having it, and leave on your best behaviour. She will either learn, or you'll start fucking other women at some point.

>>17127163
>>17127163
I definitely don't wanna say goodbye forever. Like maybe I could try again in like a month to see if she's learned anything. Then if she still does shit like this I never get back together.

I've never even like abandoned her. I call and text her everyday. I could see if there was a problem if I made no contact for like a week but fuck it's always just a DAY or so when I don't hang out

>Because of my childhood, in my opinion at least- i've become the most informed, polite, understanding and confident guy. With a good personality and genuinely unique interests to boot.
Holy shit you're me. I've never seen someone state these same exact qualities that have emerged from their situation, apart from myself.
I'm in the same boat as you, but with a narc mother. My family is still whole, but I'm moving out soon as things have gotten way worse lately. Maybe you could do the same, but in your case I think it would be best to visit her from time to time, more often in the beginning but slowly spreading them out.

I'm sorry about your situation, I know how bad BPDs are. But just remember that it's a mental disorder. She wouldn't have been like this if she were normal. I think understanding that alone will help you.

>>17127147
It's frustrating; because anyone i've ever talked to says i should "accept her"- but doing that is just turning myself into a doormat.

It's impossible and it makes me believe that not all mental disorders should be tolerated; because they're extremely hurtful and toxic.

If you need to vent; you can talk here and i can add things that might've helped my situation.

WARNING: It's impossible to move out properly with parental types like this.

Could you do a one-man good cop/bad cop routine? By that I mean, be constantly switching back and forth between sweetness, anger, moral judgement, sorrow, pity, mockery and insults? Can you get away with disrespecting your mother? Can you make her fear you?

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>>17127110
Just tell her things aren't working out. Any other methods are a waste of time for both of you.

Good luck

>>17127110

Make a choice

If you want to break up, then do so

If you want to stay with her, then do so

Eezy breezy, make a decision

>>17127117
>>17127120
its really not that easy. shes so invested and reliant on me, it would destroy her completely. im close to her family too who would hate me so much and im scared of what would happen on that front too.

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>>17127105
Ditch him

>>17127105
If you don't like him then why is he your friend?

And you can't get people to change unless you have power over them somehow. You need leverage or it will never happen.

Is he a jew?

>codependent?

Just to be clear you mean borderline personality disorder and not bipolar depression?

I've know some people with borderline, I don't know why you'd ever date one.

>>17127090
get out now. things will only get worse, i promise you this. i do not have time to type out my story, but know that i am the voice of experience. for your own sake, get far away from this person as soon as possible.

>>17127141
Hi pantiliner guy! How's that restraining order going?

>>17127058
>she's clearly having problems and doesn't want me to help which is not good for either of us
You daft cunt.
You have been together for a month, she has no obligation to tell you everything that bothers her
You aren't qualified to help her, you hearing about anything will provide no help, chances are you will make her feel worse

What would I do in your shoes? fuck that, I'll tell you what I did in a similar situation
>give her advice on someone to talk to e.g. Samaritans (don't know if that's a group outside of the UK or if there are equivalents in other countries) or a therapist
>if the situation still doesn't improve, slowly get distant (like over 2 months) and break things off, don't blame the situation, just say things aren't working out

You are stupid to think that you can save her or help.

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>>17127058
>I'm considering breaking up with her because she's clearly having problems and doesn't want me to help which is not good for either of us, but at the same time I want to be there for her because I like her and all that corny shit.

Are that much of a cunt to run away from your partner when things heat up? Don't be so immature and just BE there for her. If she wants to talk about it she'll come around. Don't force that shit, it's not like you can do much to help.
Be patient. Don't be clingy, focus on yourself and workout.

>>17127083
Whoa man, I'm saying this because we've only been dating for a month and she's being ridiculously distant during this. I'm not saying she is obligated to explain, but I helped her out of the other two situations and it worked so I mean, it's different this time. It's the fact that she wont even talk to me, so even when I know how to cheer her up she simply won't even allow it

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>>17127029
Is this bait?

>>17127029
Yes, you're gay but not for the reasons you think.

Are you retarded?

I like sudoku.

Oh, and you can call a mental health hospital, and effectively have her put under surveillance in a facility until she calms down.

It gets her off you back, and gives her something to brag/bitch about when she berates you and gossips to all of her friends.

So... Yeah. Have fun.

>>17127016
Slowly distance yourself, I don't mean stop texting or anything abrupt, but just do other things, stop being available for plans (that doesn't mean cancel) and tell her that things aren't working out.
If she starts offering sex etc don't fall for it, tell her you want to try and sort things, this will prepare her, then a week later end things citing differences or something like a lost "spark".

Can I ask why you think she will try and kill herself? do you have any reason to think that? or do you just think you are brilliant and she won't handle life without you?

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Other side of my face

>>17126993
Keep doing what you're doing, man. It seems you're doing okay.

I used to have skin like yours. I suggest that you cut out refined sugar entirely, as well as eliminating processed foods.

That helped immensely for me. Also, I only wash my face with water and a rag. No soap, as it dries out the skin. Try that for a week and see how you like it.

Well if you choose to stay, then you'll be stuck with an awkward atmosphere between you and 'gf'. Is that worth the extra pay?

Make her quit her job instead? Are tou going to be making more money than her?

>>17126992
Why would you quit your job for a girl? Plenty more fish in the sea. Have her quit.

Drink light sodas. Also the obvious is avoid smoking, tea, coffee, etc.

Bicarbonate soda is very good, but use rarely otherwise you'll fuck your teeth up.

>>17126963
I use baking powder with my toothpaste, the gritty parts help a bit.
I have heard crushed charcoal helps, but I have never tried.
Other option you can go to the dentist, and try teeth whitening, if it is a concern. I have yet to try this also?

>>17126963
Maybe that's your natural teeth color? Ask a dentist before you corrode your teeth with whitening products

>>17126949
You're barely an adult man.

They only say that because they feel the exact same way you do.

Just know that there's no set path, and that this is the time to take risks, and enjoy your mid-twenties. As long as you're working and keeping things paid on time, you'll end up where you end up.

I'm 31 with a house, wife and small child. But I still feel like a child on the inside. I feel like I'm just pretending to be an adult.

There's no such thing as "being an adult".

Here's the difference between being a kid and an "adult": One pays taxes and has debt.
That is literally it. You can absorb as much or as little responsibility as you want, but you're just as much an adult as the next guy

>>17126941
>All I could do was take two Advil tablets and go back to sleep. Migraines suck

That's pretty much the only thing you can do when a migraine comes. I used to get them often as a couch potato. I started exercising a lot more and they have gradually gone away, now I only get a slight headache once every few months.

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>>17126941
I get them. I have them more if I'm sleep deprived or if I get a lot of eyestrain or am exposed to flashing lights (even just driving behind a snowplow at night). Sinus inflammation, certain neck positions (thank you car accidents), stress, and too many food additives in too short a period of time can do it too. Sometimes I'll get really bad pain with them, other times I don't, but I always get light and noise sensitivity and wooziness.

Topamax and Inderal seem to help prevent them somewhat. Topamax had bad side effects for me. Inderal is more tolerable. Have used stuff like DHE (I think both the IV infusion and the nasal spray), tea from morning glory seeds (uncoated), etc. with varying effectiveness. The nausea from DHE got to me in spite of anti-nausea drugs, so it wasn't useful for a "take it and go back to work" type treatment.

A lot of times I would try stuff, try to deal with the side effects, give up, and go back to taking Tylenol and going to bed. That's pretty much what I do now. I have black curtains on the bedroom windows and I live in a quiet town, so I can isolate myself from noise and light pretty well. I call it "House of Usher mode." Only thing is, if I can't actually sleep right then, it's fucking boring because my head feels like a rotten tooth and even trying to listen to music or a podcast can hurt. Occasionally if the lights are dim I can read a book or work on something with pen and paper, but that's about it, and it's hard to concentrate. If I can sleep though, it seems to go away faster. Sometimes I will feel super depressed for a day or so right after a big migraine.

The other thing that seems to help a bit is that every few months I get subcutaneous lidocaine shots in my scalp and neck. That interrupts it if I'm having one at the time, and it also seems to help them not recur as badly for a couple months. I get those from my neurologist.

>>17127061
Also wanted to add: on the light/noise sensitivity tip, if anybody can think of any activity that a person can do that doesn't require the lights to be on and doesn't involve noise much if at all - i.e. something I could do when I have a migraine and can't sleep, and am just waiting it out - I would be so grateful. Right now all I can think of is fapping, meditation, or maybe some kind of brain puzzle or something.

Not at all in my opinion (I'm a femanon). This is a very normal and natural age difference.

Just be safe and don't get her pregnant.

Have fun and enjoy your youth!

>WOW I FOUND LE NONSENSICAL CONSENT LAW LOOK GUYS DIS LAW MAKES NO SENSE
Thank you captain obvious. Do whatever you want OP. If you get tried for statutory rape, enjoy the consequences.

>>17126976
She's pretty thirsty for my dick mang. I turn 20 in a month and she turns 17 in 3