Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5073. page

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>But I don't want to ask because she only ever brings up bad memories if there's extreme relevance
>Like I asked her why she won't invite me over on holidays to hang with her and her folks
>She told me that she isn't close to any of her non-immediate relatives
>Also that her step-dad is prone to anger
>Another example is I asked her why, since she's been trying to patch things up with her parents, why she doesn't try patching things up with her other folks
>She told me that she likes to take one thing at a time
>And cousins used to bully her
>And she never met most of her aunts and uncles, except the ones she has met were garbage human beings barring her uncle Greg
>About the scars
>She's told me about some of her scars
>Dog bit her face when she was young
>Hurt her eye sledding when she was young
>Dog bit her arm when she was young
>Someone threw a shotput at her when she was in highschool
>Someone threw a rock at her before she switched elementary schools

>But she just never talks about the scars on her inner thighs and the scar on her wrist and the scar on her right breast
>And I'm really curious
>But I don't want to hurt her by asking

>Is there any way to bring it up without being an asshole?

>>17253957
Maybe making assumptions but it sounds like she was raped

>>17253957

I'm partially the same as your gf. I feel for her.
Let me show you examples :

> " I love you, I cannot tell you how much I love you, and I'm seeing those scars. I mean I understand that if you don't talk about it, then I will never push you to do it. I just wanted you to know that I will always be here and that if someday you need to open your heart to someone, I will be here for you, as long as it takes."

Watch out, if this is really important she might get on the defensive, don't answer back, just say that you're sorry, and that you will never bring that subject again if she doesn't want to.

In the end, you don't need to know if she doesn't want to, maybe after years and years, in a drunk night she will tell you about it. Maybe not, never push her, you have the right to bring the subject once as the caring bf you are and you can't ever pressure her to talk about it, some people can leave you for that shit.

Also, remind her how beautiful she are, how you love her and how you will make her forget every bad memories. From your description, she's sad little woman who fought her own destiny to get money, studies, got out of her shit-hole of a family. If you're 100% confident she's self-concious about it, make her forget that pain.

You wanted to ask about her scars, I'm warning you about her, don't mess this up man. You've got yourself fragile but magnificent girl there.

>>17253962
Yup that might be it, but it can only stay as a hidden assumption. Break her privacy and she will feel attacked in the deepest scar, her psyché.

Pewdiepie

>>17253926
UnderageB& Gaming

>>17253926

Doesn't really matter as long as it's easy to remember, not too weird, well structured. I can advise you on the form of the username, not the content.

Example :

> if you know pun with animals, always works
> foreign words
> avoid weird characters : x / digits (unless with a certain meaning)

Anything

Your brain is hell-bent on destroying itself. You have to break the cycle.

I don't know if that would help, but here is my a short version of my story. I had simillar problem, sadness, numbness, suicide thoughts almost every minute.

My first memories are filled with feeling misplacement, sadness, strangness. My first suicide thought and "attempt" was when I was six years old, when I crawled under my desk with a knife and tried to slice my neck, thankfully (?) got scared of pain and blood. I just felt like such a disapointment and waste of time/space despite being one of the best students in school and having many acomplishments. All those feelings lingered through my whole life I managed to get to best schools and get decent studies but it was only when I was 24 I realized what it was because. I was never loved.

Now my parents on the surface are decent folk but in family interactions they are toxic, narcistic motherfuckers that only saw their children as their property and pillows to cry on. They told me regulary that they "love me" but noone ever cared for me. Everything I know I had to teach myself. Everything from the most basic things. Only thing that they suplied was money but I always felt ashamed to take it because they were always fighting for it. They were always critical.

Now comes my worst problem/decision. I assumed it was norm. I didn't rebel. I was good kid. They absolutely "love" the way I act. I was good son, who always helped them and never gave problems. I just internalized all the problems, feeling of being unloved, unlovable even (feelings that I didn't understand), hate, rage. Nobody ever taught me anything about life, nobody ever helped me in normal problems of growing up and I felt too ashamed of myself to even reach out to other people (I guess it is subconcious realization that if my own family doesn't help me I must not deserve help of other people) and didn't want to shame my family (which always was first thing they would say to me).

It all changed first time I ALLOWED myself to feel loved.

>>17253848
when you masturbate, what do you think of yourself?
is what you're doing really okay for you?
once you have your answer you know what to do

nofap only works because it takes away the reward for doing nothing

you're basically trying to trick your body into realizing that the current behavior you're having is no longer giving you the positive results.

the same could arguably be achieved by cutting out junk food entirely

it isn't some magic thing that boosts your other senses and personality, you're just reconditioning yourself. it isn't going to fix any real internal problems.

Instead of sitting in the basement masturbating go out and talk to people

>>17253616
What do you mean be a perfect slave gf?

Fuck off tripfag, you're terrible.

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>>17253830
sometimes i get really turned on thinking about being collared and trained to perform for my bf sexually however he wants. it's really hot and maybe my #1 fantasy. first step is to find a boyfriend, but when i get started on this part i quickly lose interest and decide i don't have time for boys and they're all shitty anyway. doesn't seem to help that none of them live up to my expectations i guess.

>>17253833
why did you even take the time to post this.

I guess "it's just her" doesn't work for you? Has to be all women?

>>17253627
Yeah, she's just the most recent example. I've noticed similar behavior in a number of women.

Question: how does this affect you?

You're still you. Keep going.

>>17253573
don't focus on what you lost focus on the things that you still have

Focus in your dreams, don't stop until you get there. Quitting is for pussys.

>>17253499

Better? How could we really know? would it change? Very slightly.

Your death could inspire someone. It could also completely destroy them.

>>17253504
What if it just doesn't matter? I think that's even worse.

I think about this way to much myself op but the thing is the world wouldn't be better without you around because you can do so much if you just try! I know it can all be hard... Like myself right now I have $15 in my bank account but I just start my new job tomorrow :) so life will always turn around if you make an effort!

>>17253442
>that timeline
hormones aren't magic pills that reshape your face and become twenty years younger

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>>17253446
>not knowing who eggman is

>>17253442
Do it. Why are you crying on here in the first place?

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>haven't shit all week
>I feel fine

Yeah, you're maybe a few days away from a perforated intestine.

But whatever, I'm sure you're an MD.

>>17253455
I don't feel any different than usually. Not full of shit or anything.

>>17253520

Oh well that solves it then. You've broken the Law of Conservation of Mass.

>>17253339
>>17253339
It seems that open relationships were never your thing but just a way to avoid danger of heart break. Tell this girl how you feel and go from there, heart break is worth it rather then being cucked. Just my opinion.

Never a good idea to willingly get cucked.

>>17253339
Your first mistake was willingly becoming a cuck. You should tell her how you feel or suffer the consequences, either way you should probably break it off since she lied.

>>17253307
First off, you're a racist sack of shit.
Just break your lease and move out if you can't deal with them. Fuck.

Fake thread
Report and hide

>>17253324
>First off, you're a racist sack of shit.

I am not a racist. I'm addressing the issues in my neighborhood. Also I believe it's ok to stay racist stuff in America. I don't believe we need to be holding stuff back any longer. We shouldn't be nice to people we don't like anymore. It's protected speech.

>Just break your lease and move out if you can't deal with them. Fuck.

Here's the problem. This is the only place I can afford with my salary. Rent prices went up 20% in my city this year. 20%. This is probably due to the Muslims refugees moving in thereby creating a housing shortage.

>>17253346
I wished it was fake, but it's happening in America now.

>>17253156
>I'm middle eastern, living in Europe
>I have $20,000 that I can invest in something
How about you invest it in a plane ticket and fuck off back where you came from?

>>17253156
Invest in sharia law and pork products

A boat back to the middle east

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>>17252968

This is coming from a modified car type of guy, but would you be interested in buying something and working on it?

It is a fun hobby and very rewarding.

Just personally never understood buy a car like that just to drive.

Buy the car outright

Get a three year loan and pay $200 a month on the car. Once that's paid off, go to minimum coverage.

>>17252819
A .50 bullet

go see a hypnotist

>>17252825
This. Shooting one rather as opposed to eating one, though I would assume this anon is suggesting eating it.

No but seriously if it is bothering you enough, find a coping mechanism. I too suffer from a similar problem.