Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 4813. page

I just want to die. I just want to feel loved.

Someone please just end the suffering. I just want the pain to go away. I just want to die

>>17315425
Does this really belong on /adv/?

>on my chest

>>17315448
>I just want to die. I just want to feel loved.
Those are kind of contradictory, anon.

>>17315458
In my opinion, it does belong here since it's meant to help people by giving them someone to confide in, who can listen, sympathize, comment, and give advice if needed.
For most people, that someone is a close friend, a family member, a priest, etc.
For us, it's anonymous.

I think eventually you tend to stop caring about what other people think.

The only thing I can offer you is an anecdote. About a year ago over the course of a month I stopped giving a shit. Pretty sure it was the last stages of brain development or something as I had turned 25.

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There's a very fine line between being yourself and acting for the sake of others.Everyone's the main character in their own story, so it's up to you to decide what kind of a life is really worth living, and what kind of purpose you're looking for be it a combination of goals you seek to achieve or such.

I used to be do this too, act for the sake of others. It takes less than a couple seconds for someone to form a impression of you and then forget it right after. Random strangers don't actually care about your every action as much as you think they do, they all have their own shit to deal with.

It seems like you've realized that you don't want to live up to the very image you built.If you want a more genuine life, experiment and find hobbies, go out and actually do something you might enjoy. Friends will come along the way if you put yourself out there (and not completely sperg out) Do yourself a favor, be yourself.

>>17315318
Well, that's nice to hear. I hope I'll grow out of it eventually.

>>17315339
It's hard to decide what kind of life I want, honestly.. I'm torn. You are right when you say it's a fine line, I'm not sure if I try to act the way I do for me or for the sake of others. I think it's like this.. I myself like the image I've built, but the REASON I created it in the first place is because of insecurities and wanting to seem cool to other people.

However I might be wrong.. It's possible I'm judging whether I like this image or not through the lens of others, in which case it might not be what my true self would really want to be.

I guess I should just try out different activities and hobbies more, as part of the reason I don't is definitely due to thinking they are not "compatible" with my image. If I allow myself to enjoy something new, something that I thought wasn't "for me", is that being yourself? What if I end up liking something that I think is stupid/bad/lame/whatever? I don't really get it, is being yourself always accepting your innate likes and desires, or is it fine to try to change them if you logically think one of those likes is bad, as long as you do it only for yourself and not for others?

Thanks for the advice anon.

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How old were you?
>18 going on 19
How did it happen?
>uh I kind of have a fetish for having a guy finish inside kek
What contraception method were you using?
>none, we used condoms at the beginning of our relationship but like 2 months in we stopped.
Were you using it properly?
>when we were using them, yes.
What went wrong?
>I'm retarded. I got extremely careless.
What birth control method or tips would you recommend now?
>depo shot (it makes you gain weight if you aren't mindful of your diet)
>basically anything that you don't have to remember to use right before sex.

Who was the mom/dad?
>my first boyfriend, previous to him I had a hard on for girls and only dated girls. He's a piece of shit so I do regret picking him.
What was your relationship like?
>we got high all the time together at the beginning. High sex=fucking amazing.
>he grew rather emotionally abusive further into our relationship.
How did they handle the pregnancy?
>rather well, I felt he was supportive at the beginning.
What is your relationship with them now?
>I left him at the end of February cause he wasn't coming home, turns out he was cheating on me and got some tweaker pregnant 2 months after meeting her. I have not talked to him willingly since May.
Any advice about who you should have sex with and when you should wait?
>don't fuck a loser, not matter how hung he is.
Are you more cautious now?
>kind of. I do use condoms but I don't every now and then lel

How did you handle the actual pregnancy?
>well I think
Did you get an abortion?
>no
Which kind? What was your experience?
>n/a
Did you have he baby?
>yes I had he baby
What was pregnancy and birth like?
>it was pretty neat, would definitely do it again
Are you raising him/her?
>yeah there's no way I'd let my ex raise the kid on his own. He and his family are very dysfunctional and are constantly in trouble with the law
How has it changed your life?
>more responsibility.

>no advice

>>17310474
Thanks for the reply! Bump for more

How old were you?
>17

How did it happen?
>carelessness

What contraception method were you using?
>pullout method

Were you using it properly?
>apparently not

What went wrong?
>I didn't pull out fast enough lol

What birth control method or tips would you recommend now?
>use a real form of birth control.

Who was the mom/dad?
>Mom was my second ever gf, we met at 16.

What was your relationship like?
>it was a 10 year long rollercoaster

How did they handle the pregnancy?
>some would say poorly, but it worked out for what we wanted

What is your relationship with them now?
>I'm trying to be a friend, she's very mentally ill

Any advice about who you should have sex with and when you should wait? Are you more cautious now?
>do.Not. Stick. Your. Dick. In. Crazy it's a meme at this point, but it will save you from lots of nasty things.

How did you handle the actual pregnancy?
>I like to think I handled it well, teenage pregnancy is tough. I "manned up" and made things work, at least for a while.

Did you get an abortion? Which kind? What was your experience?
>no

Did you have he baby?
>yes

What was pregnancy and birth like?
>a completely terrifying cluster fuck of emotion, all three times.

Are you raising him/her?
>yes, I have custody of my three kids.

How has it changed your life?
>completely, it is a huge amount of responsibility, but I'm the kind of person that needs that.

Any general advice that you would give based on your experience?
>don't take sex lightly.

>>17310222
Dear Aug. Pin.

You were a true hero, A deserved it, all those commies deserved it, You did good.

J

Dear God,

I don't know if my life is the best we could do but I believe it could be better. I hope that, obeying to the balance of the universe, things will get better. Truth be told, I believe in you as much as I believe in myself and that makes it like the grand Canyon to the mount Everest in terms of down and up. I want feel good for the right reason and feel bad when something bad happens. I don't want to be happy randomly and hypersensitive about shit. I just want to understand what I feel.

Hoping you exist and yours truthfully,

Somebody

Dear D,
Also sorry for bringing you in here. This place is bad for you, and I hope you left the minute you came here, or you never came at all. Either one is good, but seriously, choose option A if you haven't already.

J

>>17319004
How old are you and have you never had a job before? Perhaps you should look for a change of perspective, although there were places i worked it i absolutely hate and places i worked at were bearable, i always tried to make a challenge out of everything and try to compete to deliver the best results even if i was just doing the same task over and over again. That way i could enjoy my days and feel good about what i do.

>>17319004
I'm 21, had a few summer jobs that weren't bad but they were physical and not from my field.
I'm playing LoL a lot and it isn't really fun, but it seems working wouldn't feel the same.
I feel like it takes so long to accomplish something but on the other hand I've wasted couple of years that could be productive and I feel bad about it.
Why don't I have discipline?

>>17319008
This. Taking pride in your work will both make you look better in the company and help the days go by faster. Then make sure you have hobbies to do when you get home.

bump

plz respond

>Start having PROTECTED sex for a few months
>She starts taking birth control
>start having unprotected sex
Were both of you tested for STDs at some point during this time?

Is the white discharge odorless and does it look like cottage cheese? If yes to both, she has a yeast infection which is super common and not an STD. If it does smell, she should go to the doctor.

>>17318892
The fear of failure is often far worse than the failure itself. Understand this. It doesn't mean fuck all in the grand scheme of things. Why? Take a look at insanely successful people. Each and every single one of them has failed at first before they got to where they're at.

Bill Gates? His first business was a massive failure.
Warren Buffet? Harvard reject.
Oprah? She got fired from her first job in television because she was "unfit for TV"

Failing means fuck all. And you will fail. Everyone fails. None of these people give two fucks about their past failures. Their failures made them stronger and it'll make you stronger. Nobody but you will give a shit and you'll only give a shit if you let it. You're in control.

>>17318960

Thanks for responding, I appreciate it. I actually didn't know about those people's missteps, it does make me feel a bit better knowing that people far more capable than myself are still prone to mistakes every now and then.

I personally don't care whether I make mistakes or not, I know that mistakes are a learning experience and an important part of life. Can't win 'em all. It's other people that concern me more. Long story short, I was picked on a lot in high school and didn't have any friends to back me up. It's hard for me to feel open and comfortable with people. It's totally irrational for me to fear people making fun of me when I'm an adult in a society with other adults but that feeling still lingers. I'm not sure how I can deal with that other than just facing it and learning gradually by experience that everyone isn't out to get me.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Thanks again for your help, I'm glad you took the time to respond. I'll take your advice to heart and just power through any anxiety I have from here on out.

Something that helped me was the realisation that the greatest failure was that resulting from inaction. Choosing not to do anything is a choice nonetheless, and the consequences of that choice are likely to be worse than those of any other steps you may take to improve your situation. Sure you will expose yourself to some unpleasantness - embarrassment, discomfort, etc. if you step outside your comfort zone, but they will be fleeting experiences. The regret of living a shitty existence out of made-up fears could follow you the rest of your life.

>>17318814
I personally do not move forward with girls who see me as a friend. I just don't bother pursuing further as that's a waste of time.

Women have no trouble seeing guys as friends and will keep them around to fill the void that their relationship partners lack. She likely does not view you as a sexual partner.

Having said that, you are a man. You need to be confident and strong. If you are too much of a pussy to have asked her directly if she likes you as more than a friend, then you are most likely in the friend camp.

>>17318854
>Women have no trouble seeing guys as friends and will keep them around to fill the void that their relationship partners lack.

Thx anon bro. I think this is most likely what is happening.

>>17318780
can't really say myself, try asking on fetlife I'm sure there are plenty of people there that have done this

>>17318780
Go to /hc/, search for chastity or femdom. Bam mega thread continued since months with such questions.
As far as i know it does shrink a little bit after a few months but it will very shortly go to back to its original size again. Because, infact if you don't get hard for months your skin won't be as flexible. I really would love to try it too but i feel like my gf needs to long to get into it.

>>17319030
also the /soc/ archive has a chastity thread that had some good advice

basically make sure you read the sizing guide and measure a bunch!

>>>23952851

>>17318757
>I don't want to miss out on carefree teenage love before I go to college
You won't miss a thing. Just stop being so desperate and focus on living life.

>>17318757
Talk to people. Any people of any gender. Face to face, in real life, using your mouth and words. Talk to the person next to you in class, or in a line. Join a club. Do volunteer work. Hang out at the comic book store.

The more people you talk to, the more people you know, and the more who are likely to be girl-type people. And the more girl-type people you know - and who know you as one of the guys - the more chance that you and one of them will naturally pair off as particular friends.

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>>17318757
It's too late anon. Even if you do end up with her I remember my first year of college, half the people in my section (about 30 total) were in long distance relationships, myself included. By the end of the second month it was about one sixth. It doesn't matter, you will realize that in the future looking back. The game is rigged from the start, anon. At least she'll probably get a ton of college dick, so she'll be happy, that is until she inevitably faces the consequences for her immorality with an unwanted child, a loveless marriage, or horrible disease, just like all of the other heathens out there. May God watch over you, anon.

>>17318725
Mathematics is the most useful of those three.

>>17318725
Me Tarzan.

Me don't give a damn.

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>>17318725
>Astrophysics
Interesting, but entirley pointless. It's also one of the harder subjects out there, so you'll end up doing a shitload of work for very little gain. Less than 4% of students with a physics degree go on to work in physics or astronomy.

>Mathematics
Again, it'll be a lot of work, but at least this would improve your job prospects. Probably the best choice of the three.

>Scandinavian studies
Might as well study finger painting and macaroni collage making.

>>17318717
>How to increase my chances to find a girl who's attracted to me?
By making yourself as attractive as possible.

>>17318720
I'm pretty hygienic, groomed, tall and people think I'm pretty funny.
I'm also above average looking.

>>17318723
I'm sure you could improve somewhere

need more context

>>17318715
Like what?

>>17318714
Learn from the mistakes you will make. You will almost certainly get rejected. Just remember everyone gets rejected, so treat it as a learning experience and move on.

>>17318684
What is the point of this thread?

>>17318691
Talk about past sexual experiences or lack thereof.

>>17318698
Do you need any advice, or do you want a general discussion?

Go to bed you cunt

>>17318667
Then just fucking sleep, idiot.

>>17318667
Dude you still have plenty of time. Rub one out and insta-fall-asleep