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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 7161. page

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File: 06_hitman.jpg (83KB, 800x523px) Image search: [Google]
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>This man comes up to you and asks if you want to die.

Do you say yes or no?

There is only one catch, before you die you get a second of regret and realization of how easy your life would of been to fix
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36037049

>would of

you should definitely pick yes OP
>>
>>36037049
No, but I'd be fucking stoked that I was considered important enough to have Mr. 47 sent after me.
>>
I say no because I don't want to die yet

Now what

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I love being a woman. Especially nowadays.

FinaIly, with the protection of the state, we can assume our role as the dominant gender. We can beat the shit out of our husbands, emotionally torment them, even cheat on them and there is nothing they can do about it and ugly men will never have a chanse to even be with us.

For example, my husband filed for divorce a little over a year ago when he discovered I was cheating on him. I wasn't even ashamed when he walked in on me fucking another man, because I was sick of him and his bullshit inability to satisfy me sexually. I continued to sleep with my black lover for weeks after he found out, sometimes even while my husband was home. He had to listen to us fucking and me getting pleased by a superior massive black cock while he slept on the couch. He eventually lost it and smacked me, giving me just the justification I needed to press assault charges and file for a restraining order. Under advice of legal counsel, I cleaned out our joint checking account and froze it and froze our credit cards while he was in jail, to prevent him from being able to afford to hire a competent lawyer.

Yesterday, I was awarded full owenership of the house, custody of the children he doesn't even realize aren't his, 1,450 dollars a month in child support, 3,725 dollars a month in alimony and basically suffered no consequence for being unfaithful. All this for being willing and able to take a smack across the face :)

He whined like a litttle bitch to the judge, klaiming he had to get a roommmate now, because he can't afford to rent an apartment by himself and pay me what he owes me. So patheticc.
9 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>36036995
>adding an extra c to patheticc to get by r9k's algorithms to post this shitty copypasta

I thought this shit was on /b/
>>
This reminds me of that time my sister wanted to have practice sex to prepare for her date. She came home after school one day all flustered and said that her crush would only date her if they had sex after dinner. Mind you she was 16 and this dude was 19 (got held back a few years), while I myself was 11.

She told me to put on a suit, light up some candles on the dinner table and microwave a spaghetti TV dinner. I didn't have a suit so I put on my dad's which was hilariously oversized, even if I was pretty big for my age and did as she asked. I love my sister so I didn't question much but when she wanted to practice kissing after eating I got a little nervous so I backed out a little. We ended up doing that thing the dogs did in Lady & the Tramp which made it a little less awkward.

My sister had never had sex before, and obviously neither had I. She had no real formal sex education (bible belt) but had seen a porno flick after sneaking into the theater last year. I'm guessing that's where her knowledge came from because she had some pretty detailed requests, asking me to take off her bra and rub her breast, and in turn she would take off my pants and poke my weiner. We went to her bedroom and she gently tied me to the frame with her bra and took off her underwear. I didn't know what was going on and I didn't have any real sexual attraction to my sister but I got a slight chubby and she got on top of me and slid it in her vagina. She told me that she'd do all the work because l didn't know how and kinda started jumping up and down on my semi. This scared my penis a bit so it became flaccid and she was tired from all the movement so she kinda just Iaid on top of me with my penis in her for about thirty minutes before she told me to release. I thought she meant pee because I didn't know how to ejaculate yet so I peed inside her and then she cancelIed her date because she thought sex was gross. The dude ended up having herpes though so it was for the best.
>>
>>36036995
so, that picture implies a cut off around her waist, but then her boobs are shagging below the cut off. now if you see it, thats a half body alive creature with a wig.

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how do you guys deal with being ugly? I am ugly and struggle with the fact that no attractive girl will ever be attracted to me, that no good looking woman will ever truly find me attractive. sure I could be rich, but they will never truly love/be attracted to me. the fact that I have to be a millionaire as a requirement to get a decent looking gf as an ugly person just sucks, even then you can only choose between good looking or smart, you can't even have both 99% of the time even if you're rich.

the worst part is I used to be good looking until I was deformed. I was supposed to be good looking and now I'm hideous. how do you anons deal with this? the thought that I will never have a good looking gf who is attracted to me destroys me.
13 posts and 3 images submitted.
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My face is a 6.5/10 but my hight and deep ass voice seem to be redeeming qualities.
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>>36036983
maybe give it some time? I'm not a normie but i was HIDEOUS until around my mid 25, i came into my own and girls started to find me attractive. it's weird but it can happen.
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>>36037042
I'm deformed dude, I don't stand a chance, one side of my face is totally fucked up. The worst part is when I cover the injured half and look at what I was supposed to look like I'm really good looking. This is evidenced by the fact that I had good looking gfs before my injury/was lusted after by good looking girls. Now I will eternally be hideous. No good looking girl will ever find me attractive or lust after me and it makes me fucking hate myself because I feel like I was robbed of a good life all from a freak accident.

Is it true that being a fucking slut is a white people thing? I feel like it's universal but recent discussions have taught me that the area where I live is as white bourgeois as it gets.
28 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Its not a white people thing its a modern western society thing. People of all ethnicities slut it up here.
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>>36036952
It's the media and advertisers telling them they can do anything they want without consequences, which makes them choose to be unhelpful leeches
>>
>>36036933
Nope. It's universal. Every western woman has hopped on the cock carousel by the time they're 16. Every single woman, regardless of race, in western society has had miles of cock by the time they're legally an adult.

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Anyone else miss Obama?
42 posts and 4 images submitted.
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If if if if if if
>if if if if if okey domey if fif if
Okey doki
>>
WE WUZ PRESIDAAAAAANT
>>
Not really. Now that he's signing a multimillion dollar book deal I'm more than looking forward to his third novel

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how do I resensitize my penis from death grip?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Use a GUILLOTINE
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>>36036867
Don't fap, and stop looking at porn

Occasionally apply a small amount of medicated/non-scented lotion to your dick

Other than that, simply never touch your dick

Quit browsing red boards
>>
Stop fapping for 2-3 months. Let your penis heal and recover.

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I am making a list of all known things to man in two categories (good and bad). I am stuck on Coke Zero. At first I thought bad, now I'm thinking good? What do you think?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36036827
Bad. Shit's disgusting.
>>
Are you on the fucking spectrum?
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>>36036827
>I am making a list of all known things to man in two categories (good and bad). I am stuck on Coke Zero. At first I thought bad, now I'm thinking good? What do you think?
disgusting, very bad.

evil company that makes unhealthy products, what can be good about it?

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>brother is a chad
>sister is a stacy
>mom was a stacy
>dad was a chad
>am a khv robot
Why is God so cruel?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36036807
because a woman listened to the words of a BBS (big black serpant)

women literally ruined the entire world

WHY
>>
>>36036807
Must be some recessive genes there, friend.
>>
Law of averages, m80. You suffer so they can thrive. That's how it works

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this is the ultimate NEET drug

>effects not overbearing
>makes you feel warm and cosy
>forget about anxiety and depression

I've used alcohol, weed and phenibut. Alcohol works but you'll get really sick if you rely on it as a crutch. Weed's counterproductive, more of a recreational thing. Phenibut causes nausea long before having noticeable positives.

Definitely recommend, just don't buy overpriced kratom buy the cheap stuff, I got mine 250g for $30.
20 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36036787
Even though it's moderately harmless, it's still an opiod. Withdrawals still exist.
>>
>>36036818
yeah and it's really hard to get information except though self-experimentation, because everyone's a kratom shill.

I'm gonna use it every day this week then go off for a week, check what negative sides I get.
>>
>>36036868
One week should be fine, provided you aren't jacking up your doses. The longer the use and higher the dosage, the worse the WD. It won't compare to a harder opioid, but it does suck. Use magnesium and DXM to keep tolerance low.

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i'm unhappy with everything
i know no one is going to save me
i just want to run away from everyone and die. i can't do the right thing
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36036660
what's the problem my man? what do you need "saving" from? what makes you think you can't do the right thing? anyone can do the right thing if they just try, you know.
>>
Want to join a community innawoods, Anon?
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>>36036688
i'm supposed to grow like everyone else and be capable of stuff. i should be able to hold down a job and talk to people without freaking the fuck out internally every day. i should respect myself.

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>"you should only spend 30% of your net income on rent"
>30% of net income is only $420
>there is no such thing as a studio apartment for $420

Is it legitimate advice or just something retarded normies say? A safe apartment where I won't get robbed or assaulted starts at about $700 a month, which is approximately half of my net income.
28 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>36036590
Not even with 3 roommates can you find a place to live for that price here.

It's total fucking bullshit.
>>
uh get a higher net income?
>>
>>36036627
how?

bloxxgadh

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To be honest, you are not woke at all unless you've realized that you are me typing this post right now. I am you, stumbling upon this thread and reading it for the first time. It may sound like hippy bs but we really are the same being. Once you shed everything away from yourself you can see this. You are me as I am you as is the universe. We are a culmination of everything thing in the universe and everything that has ever existed has a soul. We are all that soul or being experiencing the universe as the universe. You are the rocks beneath your feet and the wind blowing through your hair. You are everything and everything is you. I am interacting with myself and the universe by writing this post and you are experiencing yourself and the universe by reading this post. We are all tethered to the same point, destined to meet each other over and over again. How woke are you, anon?
15 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>36036588
Shameless bump because I want to interact with the different variations of myself

>check em
>>
>>36036588
when will you wake up, anon?
>>
>>36036588
Fast track to this realization: psychedelics.

Track to this realization: practice meditation everyday.


This is the most simple realization.

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Do robot qt's exist? or should I just end it all now?
15 posts and 4 images submitted.
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Hard to tell. Robots are hard to meet and impossible to get close too.
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>>36036568
Sure but they all look like pic related

wow original 323298
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>>36036568
yes they do anon have hope. There are quite a few of us

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Am I doing any of this stuff right r9k?
13 posts and 3 images submitted.
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what, you tryna get some dick?
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>>36036529
You need to lose some weight and get on hormones.
>>
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>>36036639
How much weight? I don't want to do hormones

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My life is fucking over jesus christ
8 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36036480
Oh goody, another interesting story.
>>
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>>36036520
No story, just another dead end wagecuck
>>
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Sounds spicy. Let's hear it anon!

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