Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 634. page

Roastie detected.
Please leave the zone.

>>39314997
>at party with 4 girls and 1 other guy
>have all been drinking far too much
>hot girl had just broken up with her bf recently
>R-R-REBOUND SHOT
>talk to her most of the night
>had far too much to drink
>play around with her and get a bit touchy
>she goes to bathroom and is headed back to couch
>think I'll put her over my shoulder in attempt to be playful
>alcohol gets the best of me
>fall backwards after putting her over my shoulder
>suplexcity.png
>looks to everyone else like it was intentional
>she goes out and cries on the deck
>I regret life and what comes of it
That's the story of how I didn't get laid

>>39314997
You want a fucking story? I've got one for you.

Once upon a time in the far off year of 2009, yours truely was briefly in a time of happiness and prosperity but one day he got sick of aspirations and decided to push away everything that made him happy until he was alone.

Then he worked and studied non-stop while hating himself all the while hating everything that passed him by. His friends were better off without him as they got married/careers/families of their own. His ex gf's were happier in the relationships they found within 5 seconds of dumping his stupid ass. Oh and they also fucked more women than he did in those 8 years so he just decided he was repulsive and wasn't worth trying.

The idiot of this story briefly deluded himself into thinking that maybe things would change but then his whole life came crashing down upon him again and again.

Then he fucked himself up on cocaine and can't even manage a shitty wagecuck job and decided that suicide would be a better idea. Sure his parents would be sad but at least he would leave all the money he made in those 8 years to them hopefully paying back the life that was wasted on him, his friends didn't know and those that did didn't care and all the ex gf's lived happily ever after.

The fucking end!

>>39314946
No, but am I mistaken in thinking it's Fukushima? Or, was.

>>39314926
God has given the japs true comf

Yeah there's nothing wrong with it

>>39314892
Gay is a choice desu senpai and if women in 2017 are megatrash dumpster fires, refuge can always be found in the company of other men.

>>39314892
anon after a life of being rejected by woman you eventually realize they aren't the only option

>>39314892
Why compete with Chad when you can just let Chad fuck your boipussi instead?

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IDK if im a robot but.

>Japan.
>Touring/ExperiencingLivingAlone/Drank alot/Got laid once (didn't pay for it)
>19

I jump bus to bus sometimes.
I just stare out the window.
18

Yes actually. I went to Senegal at 19 to volunteer and help out. I did what I was instructed, and what extra I thought would help, met and helped people and made a few friends. In some sense I'm still a robot (even my dumb akward ass wasn't safe from the ladies there), I at least feel as much but it was an eye-opening experience to the world.

>>39314840
No. Japan is a hyper-normal, hyper capitalist dystopia. They make a bigger deal about their losers, and that's why you hear about them.

>>39314840
it's an alright place to live
really comfy
I like it

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How would a blackbot fare in Nip land? I was thinking about becoming a night shift bartender.

You'll only have one if you are chad, so you might as well start taking estrogen for chad to love you.

>>39314794
im an ugly gook 5'9. I cant be a trap -_-

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>>39314769
>>39314794
and here we see two different shills interacting with each other... subtly attempting to brainwash robots into undergoing feminizing hormone treatment by capitalizing on their vulnerable states of mind. don't fall for their trap

They probably don't appreciate you mooching off of them

>>39314941
im not though
i live alone

>>39314941
He just wants to live a quiet life

>>39314658
Show is a shit.

Main character is polar opposite in intelligence, but other than that, basically Forrest Gump.

Also, nearly has skeks on the first or second episode.

>After this, Autism will be the new "Loll guys i'm so depressed"

>>39314683
literally goes on two dates and gets offered sex. Is there a single piece of media that reflects male sexuality accurately.

I hate that actor. I love It Follows but he was such a beta fag in it. It was great watching him fail to get laid most of the movie and only getting some when it was literally a matter of life and death. Fuck him. Fuck all of you virgins lol

>>39314657
$12.50 an hour plus tips
>Tips have been $700-$800 a night quite a few times
>Don't drink or smoke anymore
>Spend money on improving myself various ways

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>>39315026
>spend money on improving myself in various ways

2,400 a month

I need a better job honestly. Or get a raise by completing senior bootcamp.

>>39314639
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OaYWy3Hg3go
and
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_ODKdStnIuM

>>393146
Too lazy to drop link
I listen to these most of the time when i wanna feel relaxed
Starset - Dark on me
Lund - Alone
Lund - Only for you
Lund - MJ

>>39314639
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vh_DemrVmN8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IUkPaWzw1A

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>have long, straight black hair
>wear it loose and all over my face most of the time
>normalfags look at me with weird faces because they can't even see mine
>mfw behind my hair

>>39314676
okay, you are just a fucking faggot. stop

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>>39314733
this.
>>39314676 you're not even being odd, you're just being a faggot with long hair.

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>>39314591
come here my neet, it will be ok
we'll get a wife someday... everybody finds somebody..

How bow you get off this board and go outside

>>39314591
If it makes you feel better anon, it's not really your fault. It's our surroundings and conditions that make us. You pretty much have just been an unlucky shit like all the other robots on this board.

>>39314590
I dont care. Keep the anime avatars comimg tbqh

>niggers are angry retards

not surprised

>>39314590
Well then they'd be no better than us now would they you stupid nigger

a lot harder.

i can't grow a beard and it sucks.
i only get chicks that like uglier versions of macklemore and that dude from 16 candles

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>>39314235
Then just grow a beard faggot
>inb4 muh genetics can't grow it.
No, you dispshit ! That's an excuse. Only yourself to blame for not improving your life.
Go to gym, be yourself, and then the beard will come.
Faggot virgin loser.

>>39314235
i'm attractive to the point where a beard just acts as a mask. are you a jawlet kek?

>>39314223
I bet you had fantasies in high school of having a wife and kids by now. Or maybe you thought you'd be a rich yuppie with 1 or 2 girlfriends.

Instead, you're a 30 year old kissless virgin or maybe some fat drunk girl in your 20s let you fuck her.

>>39314292
Nah, not quite.
I did imagine wife and a nice life in middle school.
In highschool I imagined myself dead before 30.

I'm not a kissless virgin, I had to lie my ass off to get a gf but, it worekd for a while.
Surely you have some bitter fantasy don't you?

>>39314326
>Surely you have some bitter fantasy don't you?
Why the hell would I want a bitter fantasy?

I'm living the nightmare right now senpai.