Bored

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>>39314997
>at party with 4 girls and 1 other guy
>have all been drinking far too much
>hot girl had just broken up with her bf recently
>R-R-REBOUND SHOT
>talk to her most of the night
>had far too much to drink
>play around with her and get a bit touchy
>she goes to bathroom and is headed back to couch
>think I'll put her over my shoulder in attempt to be playful
>alcohol gets the best of me
>fall backwards after putting her over my shoulder
>suplexcity.png
>looks to everyone else like it was intentional
>she goes out and cries on the deck
>I regret life and what comes of it
That's the story of how I didn't get laid

>>39314997
You want a fucking story? I've got one for you.

Once upon a time in the far off year of 2009, yours truely was briefly in a time of happiness and prosperity but one day he got sick of aspirations and decided to push away everything that made him happy until he was alone.

Then he worked and studied non-stop while hating himself all the while hating everything that passed him by. His friends were better off without him as they got married/careers/families of their own. His ex gf's were happier in the relationships they found within 5 seconds of dumping his stupid ass. Oh and they also fucked more women than he did in those 8 years so he just decided he was repulsive and wasn't worth trying.

The idiot of this story briefly deluded himself into thinking that maybe things would change but then his whole life came crashing down upon him again and again.

Then he fucked himself up on cocaine and can't even manage a shitty wagecuck job and decided that suicide would be a better idea. Sure his parents would be sad but at least he would leave all the money he made in those 8 years to them hopefully paying back the life that was wasted on him, his friends didn't know and those that did didn't care and all the ex gf's lived happily ever after.

The fucking end!

>>39315192
Is this supposed to be a comedy? I didn't even blow air out of my nose anon

Honestly don't base your happiness on other people
>my friends
>my ex-gfs
Use the feelings to make yourself a better person, to make the people around you regret not being better to you and to make the parents who obviously care about you proud, suicide is for the weak.
I know, I've felt inadequacy to exes leaving and quickly being happy with someone else, I've lost the friends who hit on girls I'm with/exes and who convinced me to be like them, convinced me to waste years of my life, but the power you have right now, the power from others bringing you down is some of the best fuel there ever is, hit the gym, get a bit into fashion, read about what you're into, do the things that you're not used to if what you're doing doesn't work because if the alternative is ending life then what the fuck do you have to lose?

File: 1412452551404.jpg (89KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

89KB, 1280x720px

>>39314997
I really didn't need to see an archeage pic this night

>>39315300
This isn't intended to be a comedy but merely a story since OP asked for one. Plus it's based on me so i'm not surprised to see you find it boring. I find it excruciating.

I've done all that self improvement shit, multiple times, the story spans over 8 years being summarized in short sentences. And that includes trying to do that self-love shit too/ use your pain as fuel thing too. Won't say it doesn't work but things just cycle between creation and destruction. Being well off now is just an omen that shit is going to be ruined not just back to square 1 but like square -50. Sort of how the marianas trench consumes more landmass than is produced by smashing tectonic plates into mountains/volcanoes etc...

The best i can hope for with self improvement is another moment like this to smash everything apart. I have shit like diet, exercise and hygene down but i can't fucking do anything that makes that effort worthwhile. It's all for nothing, i can help more people being dead than alive. I just want some fucking peace that i'll never get so at least i can break the cycle anon.

>>39314997
Is this some kind of loli abduction mount and blade mod? It kind of looks like mount and blade