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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 11225. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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Rowboats, thinking about killing myself, and using my dad's gun to do so, but it's in a password protected briefcase. Anyway to force it open?
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
Hammer. Chisel. Latch

I don't think you'd care about damaging it when you're kill
>>
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>>34101391
Did you try the magic word?
>>
saw it open bud, good luck

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>be me
>average looking guy. I would rate myself a 5/10
>in my early 20s
>6'5 ft tall
>last year in high school
>always hang out with nerds
>new female classmate
>she's hot, easily a 8/10
>honey light brown eyes, pale skin, natural red hair
>all chads ready to attack
>automatically assume that kind of girls don't go for average guys like me
>teacher starts forming random groups (he chooses)
>Stacy, me, another nerd and another average girl
>take a start and starts leading the group
>she thinks I'm smart and a hard worker, smile at me
>time go by, befriend Stacy
>she starts being more outgoing when I'm around
>starts to get physical. Whenever she sees me walking on the halls on my way to my other clases, she pokes me or gets closer to me
>always look back and smile
>wew lad
>holiday break tests coming
>math test day, on lunch I was sitting by myself because apparently I was the only dumb fuck who didn't past it
>see Stacy with 2 of her female friends, she sees me and waves saying hi
>get nervous, all my nerd friends aren't around because they pass math
>she and her 2 friends come sit with me
>I'm shocked, "the fuck is going on here?"
>Stacy asks, "you're too smart, what are you doing here? You didn't pass math either?"
>I said no, a little anxious
>she smiles, places her hand on my back and says, "me neither" then sits next to me
>random Chad comes to table and start flirting with one of Stacy's friend, the other one is on her phone
>Chad sits down with a huge juicy burger, saying, "well, today is cheat day, I'll murder the gym after school"
>I try to make a joke by saying, "every day is cheat day for me"
>everyone keks, Stacy stares at my eyes while smiling
>Chad tries to start flirting with Stacy
>madpepewithgun.jpg
>Stacy looks at him in disgust and say, "You know I have a thing for taller men, Chadlex"
>smiles, lean closer to me, hugs my left arm and looks at me smiling
>nervouspepe.jpg
>Chadlex laughs and keeps talking to the other girl
Continued
9 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
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>>34101367
>Stacy gets up, it's time to go take the last test
>asks me the classroom I'm taking the test
>I respond
>not the same classrooms
>she says, "Aww, don't let me with all these losers, come with me"
>I smile while I'm sweating like a bitch
>make some corny joke
>she laughs and says bye smiling and looking me straight to my eyes
>I go to take my test
>come back from holiday breaks
>find out we got 3 classes together
>she's happy and says she loves working with me, nobody else works the way I do, i get everything done
>today I went to school a little sad because grandpa is in the hospital
>she notices I'm sad, asks what's wrong
>I explain, she gives me a hug and says if I need somebody to talk to, she'll gladly be there
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>she was a little sick
>I asked her if she's ok, she said yes but she's feeling a little sick
>we walk out of the class together, she walks ahead of me, suddenly stops
>I grab her hips and start tickling her
>she laughs and walks out saying, "see you next time"

Me being the insecure little bitch I am, who doesn't know how to read women's body language, I can't tell if this girl is just trying to use me or she's interested in me? should I ask for her number or should get away from her?
I don't know what to do, I really wanna have my first girlfriend
>cryingpepe.jpg
>>
>>34101367
>>34101396
She likes you, you dumb dickless piece of shit faggot.

Go ask her out.
>>
>>34101367
I forget there are little kids on this board

I don't think /r9k/ is the place to come for answers. Go somewhere else with your kid problems

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>Customer tells me to have a good day
>Don't
Who /MISCHIEF/ here?
59 posts and 25 images submitted.
>>
>>34101356
Shit dude I don't know how to top the master of /MISCHIEF/

You win
>>
>>34101356
>post in mischeif thread
>not mischevious

ABSOLUTELY BTFO
>>
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>take lunch break at work
>punch back in at 29 minutes and 59 seconds after I punched out
>mfw Boss Shekelstein has to answer to the feds about his employees not receiving their mandated thirty minute breaks

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Fuck, I'm going on a 5 hour busride tomorrow to go skiing and the group I'm with is going to be like 70% college-aged girls.

I don't know a single person on this trip and I need help cause I'm a kissless virgin. How do I not fuck this up?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
>>34101340
If your asking here. You already fucked it up.

OP be honest with yourself. You will fuck it up
>>
Bring a big coat. Take it off and put it on your lap. Use the arm holes to jack it. Just rub through your pants, no one will see.
>>
sidenote. everyone will be drunk as fuck on this ride. has been billed to us as that we won't remember it.

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>feel lonely
>need sex and validation

Are there any cute /r9k/ boys who want to talk and maybe play a bit on Skype?
55 posts and 13 images submitted.
>>
>>34101300
>still uses Skype

pretty sure fembots aren't real, but nice dubs though
>>
>>34101350
I'm real enough to know that Skype is the best for video calling
>tfw can't even get a cute boys interest on r9k
>>
>>34101300
Do you need someone to watch you masturbate in front of your webcam?

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Is there such a thing as female autism? Please show examples.
24 posts and 7 images submitted.
>>
https://youtu.be/fDFaNTr44lE
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YxTOU_ry3g

this is a good one!
>>
>>34101266
yes there are autistic girls

you don't really see them much becuase they're shut ins, literally never go out
and unlike normie girls, they aren't pretty enough to post themselves online lmao

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What is inside the package
23 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
>>34101251
how should we know?
could be anything but a father
>>
Are you the same black guy from the other thread? I'm assuming its the money.
>>
>>34101251
You probablly don't know yet because you stole it.

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What should i buy with this cash white boi?
88 posts and 12 images submitted.
>>
crack nigga fuck u mean
u aint BOUT DAT LIFE
>>
>>34101141
BIeach
>>
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buy a borzoi

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How does it feel knowing you'll never cum in my tight 19 year old pussy?
19 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
Is that a fucking postop tranny cunt?
>>
>>34101089
I don't care how nasty it is I would wreck that just would want to leave after
>>
>>34101089
is that white spot mold?

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I just turned 21 and have never held hands with a girl.

Anyone want to come over and shoot me multiple times?
9 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
I would gladly shoot you and then myself but I live in cuckstralia
>>
>>34101072
It's amazing that you're more afraid of being embarrassed by talking to a girl than you are of the total extinction of consciousness that comes with death.
>>
>>34101072
join the club, anon.

I'm 21 also, something will happen eventually my dude.

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>tfw l've never lost an argument on 4chan
14 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
>>34101068
Is that right?

W0W that's pretty cool man.
>>
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>>34101068
>tfw unironically never won an argument on 4chan
too much anxiety

my brain shuts down before i can even think up the first rebuttal
>>
u have now

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Robots, what's her name? Bonus for photos.
13 posts and 5 images submitted.
>>
>>34100995
I don't want to say her name, mobilefag, it has a specific spelling and I don't want someone to recognize it.

I deleted the last of her photos like, fuck, 7 or 8 years ago.
>>
>>34100995
Homura, she is perfection
>>
Can't say the name, i promise. But i hope i can talk her again.

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>be day 8 of no fap
>Suicidal thoughts are again rising
>Wake up with blue balls or humping the bed, feeling really horny
>Overall feel really lonely

I thought you guys said that things would feel better
18 posts and 5 images submitted.
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dude jerk off now and your body will literally cramp up from the orgasm, i love jerking it after a period of not fapping for whatever reason

or get yourself a dildo and ride it and potentially achieve prostate orgasm
>>
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>>34100925
>he doesn't accept the fact that nofap is a meme
>>
>>34100972
That doesn't sound pleasent though.

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>mom and dad are starting a family bible study every night

>they want me to participate

>we sit in the living room and read and discuss a passage from the bible

Pls help
41 posts and 10 images submitted.
>>
>>34100851
Let me guess, your some edgy homosexual kid right?
>>
>>34100892
No I am not a faggot

I'm also not a christcuck but my parents are very conservative baptists.
>>
>>34100851
>be 12
>mom forces me to go to some bible study summer program
>thinks it'll be good to get me out of the house and 'bring me closer to god'
>get there and expect to see a bunch of well to do fucking jimmy and timmy's
>it's a bunch of other little shits dumped off by their parents
>first day there some kids fight each other and cuss out staff
>don't have to go back
>resume save on pokemon red

*tips*

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Would you still date this girl if you knew that another guy's cum was on her face?
18 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
As in on her face in that very moment?
>>
considering i'm going to blowbang and get spitroasted by two dudes i would prefer it if it was still on there
>>
>>34100818

Yes. And so would you.

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