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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5856. page

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How do you cope with the feelings that nobody will ever love you, even in a platonic way, and you will always be alone?
20 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>16928230
start lowering your self esteem and getting rid of the idea that you deserve love

once that goes away it starts to feel better, the hurdle is giving up hope
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>>16928249
But I already think that I am not entitled to love and lost all hope. I still feel that terrible lonelyness every moment. Are there any other tips?
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>>16928264
isolation and time, it gets a little easier every year

Hello /adv/.
Here is what happens.
I recently realized that a very close friend of mine had a victim of self harm.
She texted me yesterday and told me that she had done it again, several deep cuts. She said "tell me things as they are once and for all anon", "i need somebody spit out the truth and i want it to be you", and "i dont want any more of that 'dont do that to yourself i love you' bullshit".
The thing is, i told her that she suffered a mental illness and that seeking professional help is her best option right now, but she refuses to believe that she suffers a clinical condition or that she needs professional help.
Her mother once saw the cuts but all she did was to tell her to cover them so her dad wouldnt see them. Her family doesnt know about her condition, only her closest friends.
When i told her she was victim of a mental illness she even got offended.
I dont know anyone who is a psychologist so i wouldnt really have anyone to ask, so i come to you.
What do?
18 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Had been a victim* mb
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I don't know why people are so opposed to the idea that they might have a mental illness. Clinical depression is a mental illness, and thousands of people suffer from it. Mental illness doesn't mean stupid or helpless or anything like that. If you're depressed to the point of self harm, especially multiple times, I'd say it's safe to say you are deeply depressed or even bipolar. Both mental illnesses.

Anyway, try to explain that having a mental illness isn't something that she should perceive as offensive, and that there are plenty of ways she could get help if she wanted it.
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>>16928147
Sounds like teen angst.
Suicidal ideations from depression, most likely.
Anyway. If she doesn't want help, the least you can do is deny her the means to self harm.

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hey /adv/

I made the acquaintance of some fellow we'll call Dwayne last year. Dwayne and I had a lot of mutual friends and still do. He was convicted for weapons charges and something else which landed him in prison over a decade.

He's served his time and is free.

I'm not going to give many details but imagine he's recently been causing severe strain on my livelihood. Let's say it can't be settled maturely. Let's also assume I've never wronged this guy. Let's sum it up and say it is 100% unwarranted and he knows what he is doing.

I know he is trafficking Schedule I drugs for a living right now. I also know a nice amount of information about him.

Should I work with the FBI and local police to get him back in prison and remove any threats and uneasiness on my life?

What would you do, /adv/ ?
24 posts and 1 images submitted.
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So you are planning on destroying someone's life... If you seriously think what he is doing is wrong then you might as well work with the police.
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>>16932260

>Dwayne and I had a lot of mutual friends and still do.

Be careful.
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>>16932326
Assume that his disrupting my livelihood is serious and beyond what constitutes a mere nuisance.

Cmon /adv/, I need advice :(

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Hey femanons, would you rather have a 3some with an alpha or a 2some with a beta?
25 posts and 2 images submitted.
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She looks pretty on the thumbnail but her skin is so disgusting
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Def 2.
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>>16931818
Why? I like the birthmarks personally, make her seem prettier?

>>16931819
2some? You lying? What if he was super hot?

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What to do if I had too much coffee?

I had 4 cups of strong coffee this morning in a 2 hour period because I had a hangover from last night.

I'm nauseous, dizzy, tired, but can't sleep. In a daze. Gagging often. My stomach is bloated to full capacity. Migraines. Hot and clammy. Feeling a little faint.

Just generally miserable. I ate some kinda carb heavy food in hopes that having a full stomach would calm me down..

I still feel terrible. What more do I do?
22 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>16932301
four cups shouldn't do that to you. Maybe you ate something wrong?
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Drink water. Drink some chamomile tea or take some zzquil or something
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Caffeine makes hangovers worse. Take some aspirin, call out sick if you work today and learn a lesson from this.

I only get romantic interest very rarely. Since I'm nearing my mid twenties I really want to have a boyfriend before I get old.

There's this guy who wants to get together with me but he's into comic books and nerd culture and stuff and it's really offputting. He's also indifferent about sex.

I feel like another chance won't come around but I'm wondering if I can ignore all those off-putting things
39 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>16930720
don't settle for a dude you don't like, other dudes will see that you're in a relationship and will backoff even though you're not happy with your current BF
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>>16930720
You don't like him. Don't begin a relationship out of a lack of options, ever.
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>>16930725
But there are no other dudes...

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It can be in or out of the sack.
I know a lot of you virgins are going to sail in and give advice, that's great, I can't stop you. Just remember that when you do it usually becomes pretty obvious pretty quick that you have no fucking clue what you're talking about. Remember, if you read it in Cosmo or saw it in porn, it's probably bullshit.
64 posts and 3 images submitted.
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Nothing you do will matter if you don't enjoy yourself and if your not actually relaxed and focused on what's going on RIGHT NOW
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>>16931779
girls love it when you jab away at their clit with your tongue. just flick it over and over and in 15 seconds she's cumming buckets. if she doesn't cum then she has a broken clit or something.
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>>16931779
k, I'll start.

This one is not a sack tip but it will get you laid. Look for an opportunity when you are out with your girlfriend/wife's friends to compliment your girlfriend or wife to her friends when she is not around.

I.e. she gets up to go to the bathroom, you watch her go away and you tell her friends "my god she's amazing. She's so real and sexy right down to the way she walks. She cooked x the other day and it was orgasmic, we should have you over sometime so you can try it."

They'll tell her and you'll at least get a bj.

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I may be dealing with heartbreak in the near future. How do I prepare myself emotionally
22 posts and 6 images submitted.
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Prepare an activity that can distract you from the pain. Something related to an hobby, or something physically satisfying.
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>>16927902
How do I motivate myself do actually do this activity? I have problems with motivation as it is, but that's nit the point right now.
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Bump

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no /vent/ thread? I needto vent so hard right now
I'll do it in a reply though, to keep it generic
329 posts and 31 images submitted.
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I want to fuck a MILF/MILFlike very badly, but I know that's impossible. However, I dream of it, and I wish sincerely for it to become reality.
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I rolled the dice today
Three days until I'll actually see how the roll turned out
The anticipation is killing me
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FOR FUCK SAKES

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Why does it feel horrible to text someone and they don't reply back?
44 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>16930750
because its a form of rejection, even if its a small one
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>>16930750
it's a lesser version of saying hello to someone in person and them not responding.

humans are social creatures, we need attention to live in society, and when people you like deny you attention it's just as bad as them saying 'fuck off and die.' Given how many people (trolls) thrive off of negative attention, being ignored sometimes hurts worse than actual abuse.

I mean what actually happens with texting is that they're just lazy or were taking a shit and didn't see your text, but it's the same psychological principle.
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Not op, but what if someone will text you a lot one day, and then not reply for days?

Ok, so here is the deal.
>hooked up with a random girl at a party a few years back.
>condom must have broke
>find out last year i have a daughter and the mom passed away
>out of a sense of duty i took her in.
>kind of expected to grow attached to her over time.
>nope.
So its not like i hate the girl or anything, but i sort of have the same feelings for her that you would have for some kid you babysit for. I give her all the basic necessaties, and pretend to love her, but i genuinely feel nothing emotionally for her, and sorta wish she didnt exist. I was talking with my friend the other day about it, and said it might be better for me to put her uo for adoption, because at this age she could still be adopted, and with ne she would probably become emotionally stunted. What does /adv/ think?
63 posts and 4 images submitted.
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But what's the reason for you putting ger up for adoption? Because you're unable to care for her financially or because you don't feel anything for her?
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Being put up for adoption at an age that she can remember WILL fuck her up

My older half sisters are absolute wrecks because of that, i know that's anecdotal but I can't imagine any way in which she would be worse off being with a dad that pretends to love her than being dumped on yet another family.

Maybe you will grow attached too her over time and if you're concerned about her well being then maybe you have more love for her than you realize
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>>16931388
No, financially i am able to provide for her. Emotionally i am not. Like, i just dont care about her at all. And it does seem sorta cruel, growing up with a parent who doesnt love you. I mean, i go through the motions, but i dont have that paternal instinct i assume most oarents have towards their children.

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I'm a 36 year old male. I enjoy playing tabletop RPGs and card games so I often go to this cool little game store closeby to my house where I play with other adults and kids too. I'm good friends with the owner so I spend a lot of my free time there. I play with a lot of the kids and teach them how to play Magic or D&D, GURPS, whatever and a lot of them look up to me as like a big brother figure. One of the kids that goes there wanted to ask me for help with something like a month ago. So we sat outside and he asked me if he could stay at my house for a few days. I asked him why and if something was wrong. He told me his mom is really mean to him and hits him a lot. They argue a lot and he feels unwanted at home, she always calls him names and says hes useless. He shows me some scars and bruises from his last beating and says he doesn't want to go home so he spends afterschool at the store or at school.

I felt really bad for him so I said he could stay at my house while we sort this situation out. I let him stay at my house for awhile and I called social services and explained the situation. They did an investigation and they determined there was nothing wrong. Apparently she explained away the marks by saying it was kids at school and he has a history of being bullied (Which is true but he told me they've never beaten him up). Clearly social services is a little incompetent. However he has told me his life has been hell ever since the investigation and his mom is being ruthlessly mean to him because he clearly told someone about her. He comes to me and says he doesn't want to go home anymore.

I said you know what, you can come stay with me and we'll figure it out. The kid has stayed with me for like 4 days and his mom does not give a fuck, at all. She hasn't even called him or anything. What are my options? Do I try again with social services? Should I just let him stay here from time to time but make him go home occasionally? He's really happy staying with me.
31 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>16929710

prepared to be looked at as a predator.

not saying you are, but too much of your story lines up with being one, and anyone outside looking in will say the same thing.

1: distant kid with dysfunctional school and or homelife, no father figure available.

2:unsupervised time with non parental and non teacher adults

3:said adult engages in activty not typical of his age group

4:has demonstrated no regard for parental authority in allowing unrelated child to stay at his residence.

You had best document EVERY encounter before you proceed.

Without a preponderance of evidence, the government is never going to seperate a child from mother.

look for another family member to this kid, or get the school involved.
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If his mom is that much of a cunt then yeah, just let him chill at your house. Social services are really hesitant to take away children because it's an economical burden so unless there's undeniable proof they're not going to do jack. It sucks but I think you're on your own.

Where is his father or other family?
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>>16929736
Being seen as a predator is the least of my concern, I don't care as long as the kid ends up happy. What do you mean document every encounter, like video tape everytime I'm around him? That's not really feasible.

>>16929757
No father, no other family. It's just him and his mom. Probably another reason why SS wouldn't take him.

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I'm facing divorce we have two children who I love to pieces. I love my wife but we have faced a lot of obdticles along the way and she has finally given up. No more talking or trying to work things out. Today she told my four year old son " I hate your dad " I don't know what to do. The thought of losing my children is driving me crazy. I know other men go through it but the reality isn't there when you're not in their shoes. Any advice?

Greatly appreciated
28 posts and 1 images submitted.
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This might be too serious to discuss here. I'd definitely try talking to a counselor / therapist. Not just for who gets the kids, but coping in general.

Also, considering lawyering up. This escalates the situation, I'd think, but she seems hostile.
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Modern men. Breaking up their families because
> wahhhh I can't get along with one woman
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>>16929587
That's not what OP said at all. Learn to read you bitter cunt.

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>live with gf
>used to fuck constantly
>now she's always too tired for sex
>tonight (friday) she collapsed on the couch at 9:30 and is sleeping next to me now

Should I just rape her? How do I get her to be less tired? I mean, she is legitimately tired from like all week of waking up at 6am to ride half an hour to her vet internship and usually gets back around 7pm but i never get to ejaculate inside her anymore.

Pic isn't her but has a similar body type, so you can see how difficult this is for me sleeping naked next to someone like that and not filling every oriface with cum.
28 posts and 0 images submitted.
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>>16930997
see you in /trash
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>>16931000
Please sympathise with my plight
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>>16931013
Dude I have 4 kids. Dry spells are a fact of life.

Ask her to roll over and give you a buttjob if she's too tired to get into it.

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Is it easier to learn to like sex or become OK to not ever getting a romantic partner?
21 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Or you could stop exaggerating everything for one second and come to the correct conclusion that not liking sex means not having a sexual partner. Nothing to do with a romantic partner.
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>>16930885
>just find a boyfriend who doesn't want sex
>just find a landlord who doesn't think you'll pay rent
>just find an employer who doesn't expect you to work
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>>16930900
A romantic relationship is about mutual gain. Landlords and employers are service providers. If you see boyfriends as romance dispenser in exchange of sexual services then perhaps this deeply ingrained sexism would explain why you are unlucky in relationships.

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