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Pic related.
How do I become more dilligent?
If I'm not fully interested in what I do, my attention changes immediatly to simpler things. Example: Let's say that I'm reading a book about something I want to learn for the sake of it, but I'm not really into the subject. Quantum physics, dunno. After a while, I start to either browse the web, play videogames, use my cellphone or eat, without paying any attention at all and forgetting everything I learnt.
Also, my willpower seems wavering and weak. I give up easily, and barely do things because I simply cannot start or continue them. I always feel bad about how lazy I am, but, because I can't picture myself improving in such aspect, I don't do anything about it. I enclosed myself in this sensation, and became so self-conscious about how lazy I am that I project such feeling into the future, and do nothing because I know that's what I'll probably do.
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Get adderal.
Learn everything ever
But i feel you OP. I feel like that all the time.
Try to learn something. Spend 10 min doing it then i am doing something else entirely.
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>>17829183
>Let's say that I'm reading a book about something I want to learn for the sake of it, but I'm not really into the subject.
Learn things you're interested in
Wtf
>because I can't picture myself improving in such aspect, I don't do anything about it.
This is the real issue
Remember times that you've gotten better at something, forget your failures
Don't tell me live never gotten better at anything that's bullshit
Even if it's fucking being better at call of duty that's something
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>>17829210
Same anon but do you have a laptop?
Something I always wanna try was taking a laptop and make sure its one that cant play jack shit.
Go to a library or somewhere fuckin boring and do what you wanna do. Get an app that encourages you to not touch your phone. Or keep it in your car.
I dont have one but its prolly a good idea to get away from anything that may tempt you.
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>Dead without response
Not sure how to word this into a question so I'll just lay this out. Let me know if I'm not clear.
I'm 19 with very mild anxiety, living under high-expectations parents in America, working an average weekend job and making just-passing/average grades in uni studying CompSci.
I had a better academic status in the past, but it went a sour once I graduated from high school for whatever reason. Near-shitty grades the first year, and I'm still blindly studying CompSci for the money without any real plans on what to do with the degree.
I actually do fine in programming classes, but some geneds fuck me up.
I feel like I'm wasting time and money, my optimism is dying and I'm sick of sitting through parental lecture every semester just because I'm not their star student anymore.
My major goal for this phase of my life is to move out with a job that covers a comfortable life for one/two while continuing to pursue success in illustration/animation.
I would've chosen to study some form of visual/creative media to begin with, (I do best in these subjects) but I've been told I'd be paid peanuts with a degree like that.
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Well, first of all, majoring in an area simply to earn good money is one of the stupidest things you can do. You're going to burn out so bad it's not even funny.
I'm studying psychology because it's the only major that interests. I know it's a low-paying area and that grad school is mandatory in order to make decent money, but I still chose it because I didn't want to be miserable in college studying something that doesn't interest me.
Second of all, what university do you go to?
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>>17829910
>majoring in an area simply to earn good money is one of the stupidest things you can do
its actually, like, the cornerstone of self-improvement. ever heard of this place called america? people come from all over the world to work as a fucking gas station attendant because they make WAY more than they would working in their home countries, even as doctors
>I'm studying psychology
HAHAHAHAHAH! what a fucking idiot! there's your problem!
op, compsci is good but you need to sync up with your local hackers and learn from them if you want to be any good
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>>17829910
>Simply for the money
While the payout was a large factor, I actually went for CompSci because I was a decent programmer in high school.
If I didn't struggle with some of the math barring me from taking higher major courses I'd probably have a better time.
>What university do you go to?
I transferred to NOVA community after hard times at ODU, and I've planned on eventually transferring to GMU since.
Anonymous
Is this guy playing me? 2016-12-06 10:33:43 Post No.17829138
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Is this guy playing me? 2016-12-06 10:33:43 Post No.17829138
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>Been dating this guy for 3 months
>Actually no, I've been texting this guy everyday for 3 months and we went on one date in his city
>He lives an hour away from my gradschool
>Will...not...visit...me, even though I met him when he came here to visit (my grad school is his undergrad)....so I know he can make it here
>I plan on visiting him in 2 weeks after final
>Why do I get the feeling I'm going to get pumped and dumped
>Am I getting played?
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>>17829138
How often do you text and call
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>>17829138
Have you had sex yet.
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>>17829176
Probably 100 texts a day, no call
>>17829178
No
I just shit myself for the first time in 24 years. What do I do??
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>>17829127
get a funnel and put it back in
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>>17829136
Tried that already, didn't work. Any other suggestions?
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Clean it up.
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How did you find your career /adv/?
I've been years undecided and it's pretty much THE reason why I'm still a NEET.
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>>17828985
grew up liking to tell stories, settled on wanting to be a writer. moved to los angeles, realized its hard to break into the industry and you gotta spend at least 15 years doing shit you dont want just for the opportunity to do shit you want and even then its a slim chance.
so i started working at an office, and went from receptionist to manager in a week and now i run the whole business and only have to work five hours a day so spend my spare time on independent projects.
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>>17828985
I have a good radio voice according to my friends, and a very approachable face.
So I landed an easy support IT role in college and then graduated to big boy support in the real world and hate it.
But it pays pretty well
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Thanks guys.
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I am permitted to choose my tester for my drivers license. Should I choose a man or a woman?
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woman, she's probably not strict
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Man, so you don't come to /adv/ later asking if you should or how you should ask your tester out and spare us the trouble.
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>>17828959
I'm a girl
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Starting to think I would be better off dead. I'm 25 and live with my mother. I have psychosis which pretty much pushes away everyone that even attempts to be involved with me. I recently found out I contracted an STD by having sex with someone I don't care about again. I'm fat, insane, diseased, and generally pretty worthless. Just want to die.
Pic related. It's me being a fat POS.
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>>17828917
Methinks this is bait
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Nah you are very beautiful OP.
Depending on the STD that can be taken care of.
Its clear you have a ton of depression and other issues so the best thing you can do is get help by seeing a therapist.
Seriously i have huge anxeity issues and some depression. I used to go to the hospital on a regular basis because of panic attacks. But since i started to talk to a therapist shit got easier. It didnt get cured but i havent been to the hospital in almost a year.
You can learn to manage it and live with the issues you have. We all have them. I am fucked up but now i am a bit less fucked up and more livable before.
You definitely can find someone who wants you. But you need to work on you first b4 you worry about that. Seek help because it seriously helps and keep at it.
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go2church bruh
is gud
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I've been going out with my girlfriend for 2 months. She's fucking brilliant. Hilarious. Caring. Beautiful. Understanding. All that. She really is a winner. I love her positive attitude.
But there's a problem, she shares a lot of music similarities as my flatmate / best friend and we're all pretty obsessed with music. But I'm into a completely different spectrum of shit.
Now I wouldn't mind really as I'm pretty open minded, and she does make the effort to enjoy the stuff I listen to and vice versa. my best friend has never really appreciated shit that I've been into (very opinionated and a bit selfish to be honest) and I've always been dragged to nights out that 'he' wants to go to... and don't get me wrong, they've all been pretty fun, but it feels like I'd just be repeating everything I've been doing before with my friend (which I got bored of) when I want to do loads of different stuff. But yeah, a lot of the nights she wants go to .. guess what - he's always interested to come with.
What's even more annoying is her sister is basically exactly like my best friend (so you'd think it'd make sense that they hook up to be fair)... and always wants my gf to do stuff with her. Move in to a flat with her, go to a festival that I'm really not that keen about etc etc
I thought I could roll with it but I ended up having a really bad time at a night I went out with her and her sisters (took too many drugs and started getting really paranoid about the whole situation)... and it's really fucked me up big time. I kept thinking "I shouldn't be here.
I know there's more to life than music but it's one of my passions and it kinda sucks that it doesn't feel like I'm connecting on that level. Because aside from this... well there's nothing wrong really.
Is this really worth it?
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Yeah dump your gf and keep taking drugs and listening to your shitty music. You sound like a real winner.
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>>17828927
i was thinking of quitting drugs to be honest cause its just fucking my head up.
we all take drugs.
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Plus I just can't get the thought out of my head that she should really be with him? what the fuck is wrong with me
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>be me, high-functioning aspie
>am talking to coworker, and things are going good. lots of smiling, laughing, etc, etc.
>after work, ask her out
>'you busy next weekend? I mean, if you wanted to get coffee or something.'
>she says she's busy with church stuff
alright, it's cool. I took her word for it, but I realize that was probably a gentle 'no', which I'm ok with.
Here's the issue. Things got weird. I knew I could be cool about it and move on if I got rejected, but I fucked up by not considering the fact that maybe SHE wasn't cool with it, or even that I had completely misread her friendliness as a green light.
I don't really care for the friendzone stuff; I mean, now at least I can move on with my life. Except for the fact that now things got weird between us at work. To make things even more fun, we have to work together pretty often.
Should I say something to her? I've considered just being upfront about my thoughts on it, that I didn't think of the issues that could come with dating coworkers and stuff, and didn't take into account how she'd feel about the whole thing. Or should I just forget it and give her some space?
Also, be honest: am I fucked?
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Don't shit where you eat.
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Yea
She's gonna go to hr claiming you sexually harassed her soon
Leave country asap
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>>17828864
Hope you learned your lesson. Wait for actual signs of attraction next time.
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Okay b so I'm getting real close to this girl who has a kid. She's 20 with a 5 year old and I'm 19. I've never thought of having kids at an early age but the way I see it, I wouldn't have to deal with the toddler/baby bullshit. She makes me happy and we both agreed to take it real slow. What would you do?
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>>17828828
id enjoy it while it lasts, but at 20 years old i wouldn't expect it to go anywhere. if she makes it clear shes aiming for a provider, duck out early. but if she already has a big support system (something normal if you were pregnant at 15) and is basically dating around, just enjoy it while it lasts.
just try not to get too close to the kid.
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Run as far away as possible
Probably fuck her once to get it out of my system
Fuck raising a kid before 25 let alone someone else's kid with a bitch that got knocked up at 15
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I've made it clear that it'd have to be atleast a few years(if it even lasts that long)before I even start thinking about trying to help. She's raised him mainly by herself so its not like she's looking for a dad now.
I've known this girl for about 4 years now, and at first, we hit it off; we talked about everything you can possibly imagine together. We were best friends. But just recently, she broke my trust by lying to me; she said she was going to deactivate her Facebook account, and I ended up finding out she blocked me instead. This is the same girl that has slept with 5 different guys behind her boyfriend's back, one of them being her own boyfriend's brother. She even told me that the boyfriend's brother has a bigger dick than her boyfriend, and that he fucks better than him. Should I even bother with this slut anymore?
>pic related, it's her and her boyfriend
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>>17828824
>Should I even bother with this slut anymore?
You wanna date her? Hahahahahahahagahagahahahahagagagagagagagaggsgdjkcifidosofjjxd
Even if you could (you can't) she sounds awful. Also, you sound underage. Fuck off.
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you know the answer.
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>>17828824
She blocked you, that's a cowards eating of saying no I'm not interested
You have no option lol
Anonymous
Can guys really have female friends that they don't want to fuck? 2016-12-06 08:48:31 Post No.17828817
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Can guys really have female friends that they don't want to fuck? 2016-12-06 08:48:31 Post No.17828817
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Can guys really have female friends that they don't want to fuck?
Anonymous
2016-12-06 08:48:31
Post No. 17828817
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My girlfriend has lots of "just friends" that are male.
As a guy, every female friend I have ever had in the past was on my would fuck list.
My gf has male friends who constantly give her stuff and tell her she's pretty, and act kinda clingy with her.
Example-- gave her some hickeys...one "just friend" made it known he doesn't like it when she has them.
Is it really possible for a girl to have guy friends who don't really want to fuck them?
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>constantly give her stuff and tell her she's pretty, and act kinda clingy with her.
>my girlfriend
Dude you're the hugest fucking beta cuck I ever saw on this site
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>Example-- gave her some hickeys...one "just friend" made it known he doesn't like it when she has them.
LOL
Tell him to fuck off
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Unless they are gay or she's ugly as fuck probably not
But that doesn't mean they will fuck her
It's especially true with anyone below 30
My girlfriend lost 100 followers on Instagram when she posted a photo of us together kek
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I believe that I've come a long way in carrying myself with confidence and dignity, and people--both men and women--are drawn to that. The problem is whenever I start to have attraction to a woman or her to me, I lose my shit and revert back into needy beta mode. I start grinning like a fucking retard around her, wanting to do things for her and being all-around too available.
This puts the brakes on budding relationships and I end up feeling rejected, then depressed, then confident again, when my hormones settle and I go back to being my base level self. How can I stop this? I know that women are just people and that I should just talk to them like any normal person (albeit with a little flirting), but when I like someone I revert to a less controllable state of mind.
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This sounds absolutely like me
Question seconded.
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>>17828797
stop focusing so much on what you're doing right or wrong.
put it this way: a woman is only worth dating if shes actually into you. putting on an act of not being interested to make her interested would only make her interested in a fraud.
but the truth is this isnt whats breaking the relationship. you arep robably not actually making moves. like you set the playing field and flirt and introduce, but how many times have you said
>great, its a date
and waited to see her reaction? how many times have you legitimately asked someone out since becoming 'confident'.
you are over analyzing everything and making assumptions that you already failed before you ask someone out.
confident men grin and make themselves available too for the record.
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>>17828797
>being all-around too available
"Too available" and "smothering "are not the same. Be open, be available, but don't be needy.
As to what to do, relax. It sounds dumb, but it's all we can say.
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>be sorta-dumpy dude
>great personality, so lots of friends
>no gf tho
>go to poetry event
>hit it off with this girl
>afterwards she friends me on Facebook
>we start talking
>like, a lot
>far as I can surmise, she's had a crush on me for a long-ass time
>like, a year
>I've never had anyone feel anything remotely romantic towards me, especially not this long-term
>the very concept of anyone having a crush on me is totally foreign
>we're getting coffee in a few days and hanging out
>I'm a babe in the woods over here
Long-story short, this girl seems to genuinely have a thing for me. She asked what I was doing today because she "needed to see me" before she left campus. I've never been in a relationship and this is all totally foreign to me.
How do I ensure I don't make a complete jackass of myself?
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Ah you probably will but fuck it that's life. She already likes you, I believe in you
Most advice will probably just make you more self conscious
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>>17828796
She has a crush on you. She likes who you are. What to do? Simple. Go have coffee. Be yourself. Done
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>>17828796
The relationships I've had that began with the girl approaching me were by far the most stable and fulfilling, and lasted the longest.
Especially if she had to wait because I was with another girl, or if she thought multiple girls liked me at the time, or if she felt insecure or inferior to me somehow.
She's already decided that you are high-value from her perspective and that she likes you as potential dating material. This will shape her perceptions of you from this point forward. She will interpret things you do in a more favorable light than some other random girl would, 'cute' instead of 'awkward', 'motivated' instead of 'creepy'/'tryhard', 'committed' instead of 'desperate', etc.
Girls rationalize their perceptions to match up with their preconceived notions. They use backward bullshit logic and rely too heavily on their intense emotions and care to an enormous degree about what their friends think and how healthy all of their social relationships are.
So she's already decided you're good. You *can* still fuck up if you manage to do enough dumb/flaky/beta/weak shit that it ends up actually changing her concept of you. But short of that, you're good.
My younger brother told me he tried to commit suicide 2 weeks ago. He's only 20. He was really drunk and said his life sucks. He flipped out and told everyone to fuck off and went to bed so I didn't get a chance to finish the conversation.
The next day I had to go back to my apartment, 2hrs away. He won't answer my texts. I'm gonna call him tonight, after work. Besides the personal stuff I'll share with him, and the wtf is your problem be grateful for what you have and thankful you're not starving in Ethiopia! Are there any good quotes or sayings that can help him view life from a different perspective?
tl;dr- my brother is depressed and ready to end it. How to I tell him don't without calling him a pussy ass bitch with no balls who can't handle the normal struggles of life when other people have it worse
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>>17828715
You sure he isnt dead already if hes not answering... fuck, OP
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explain it to him in an understanding tone and listen to him. it seems like you don't even know what is wrong with him
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>>17828715
You have a warped view of how depression works
Read up on it first and then instead of talking try listening. He obviously has some shit to say