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>wake up
>your dick is now this size
What do
6 Posts / 1 Images
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>>34756679
go on omegle and jack it
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>>34756679
Be furious that I now have a pencil dick):
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Post it on /r9k/
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>tfw INFJ
Rarest male personality type who connects with rarest female type ENTP
How do I find a mate with this alien brain?
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>>34756600
ENTP man(male)
quick rundown please
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>>34756600
>tfw ISTP
>can choose between being a hermit or dying in some fuck off battle field
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>tfw no shit disturber ENTP gf
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What is it like having an attractive sibling?
femanons also welcome to answer, especially if you're ugly yourself
27 Posts / 3 Images
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makes me feel good when someone says I look like them
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>>34756552
I bet it sucks for Emma, but at least she has her fame and money to fall back on
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Can that fag like handle my short position on Morgan Stanley? The 80s want their haircut back
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Now that the dust has settled on this controversy, what does /r9k/ think of reading books?
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A huge fucking waste of time
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I think it's good and that I should do it more.
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>>34756532
I fucking hate people who read books
readers are garbage idiots who need to be culled from the earth, I swear to god I am gonna punch the next reader I see in the fucking throat
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Help /r9k/.
How do I defeat my (one sided) rival?
>inb4 autism
He is this normie with decent facial aesthetics and also a manlet. He says he is smart and High IQ but was completely freaked out when i asked him details and proofs for his claims.
I need to defeat him, and i may need some ideas, He is fucking obnoxious and deserves death, If it wasnt for laws, i would have killed him already.
How can I SHOW HIM MY SUPERIORITY, MY POWER, HE NEEDS TO KNOW IM BETTER AND HE WILL KNOW THAT I AM HIS GOD.
Help me, robots, please?
12 Posts / 5 Images
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>>inb4 autism
This is an extremely autistic thing to do. Especially to have an "arch enemy" or something like that
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>>34756667
In that case i dont care about the autism
I just need him broken and gone
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>>34756531
Castrate and blind him. Then you will have achieved your dominance.
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Why don't scientists take samples of the sweat of celebrities then take it into a lab and find it's exact molecular properties, then synthesize and mass produce it and sell it? I would pay lots.
8 Posts / 1 Images
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Scientists are too busy researching other useless shit, they lack time to fuel your fetish
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>>34756462
> Nofap already ruined because of this pic
FUCK YOU OP YOU'RE THE REASON I CAN'T LAST MORE THAN 12 HOURS
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organic synthesis is not magicit's the next best thing, though
>be me
>try nofap
>surprisingly no urge to fap or watch porn
>this no fap is the best one i've ever had
>9 days without even thinking about fap
TheRevelation.jpeg
>i didn't have a single boner since day 3
i'm scared to shit did nofap messed up my dick?
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>>34756437
You dick probably is used to the fact that you jerk off like a machine gun however since you did no fap that messed up it maybe
>also considering your on r9k you maybe have a fucked up fetish and would give you Rapey thoughts
tl;dr NOFAP IS A MEME
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>>34756437
No its doesn't. Your dick is fine. Let me explain the average virgin who still in their parent home.
>be me
>22 male
>fap a lot
>everytime I want a gf I fap
>no longer want gf
>basically fap everytime before making big decision
>repeat cyle till 30 years old
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>>34756584
It is, its a cop-out. People who have nothing going for them fixate on one thing and blame it for all their problems.
Anonymous
How do you guys fail at this? 2017-02-09 10:16:57 Post No.34756431
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How do you guys fail at this? 2017-02-09 10:16:57 Post No.34756431
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How do you guys fail at this?
Anonymous
2017-02-09 10:16:57
Post No. 34756431
[Report]
[View this topic]
After so much complaining about tinder, I went ahead and made an account about an hour ago
I already have 4 matches and they are texting me.
I'm not a Chad by any means.
You guys just need some better pics
35 Posts / 4 Images
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>IMG_ filename
Fucking phoneposters burn in hell
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>>34756431
But are you even getting anywhere with these sluts? Come back when you actually get laid
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>>34756431
FUCK OFF NORMIE FUCK OFF FUCK OFF REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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>Always wipe ass from the front when taking a poo
>Always end up getting a little pee on my wiping arm
7 Posts / 3 Images
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>>34756412
>not squeezing and dabbing your peen first
Ya dun goofed
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>>34756412
>after a heavy log my asshole is shitty
>too lazy to wipe with toilet paper
>bend my dick forward and piss my asshole clean
Feels gud mang.
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I wipe back to front so I can get a lil doodoo in my grundle and let the smells marinate.
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what did she say, /r9k/?
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ok originali commentori
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>>34756347
>i only talk to heterosexual males. leave now if you aren't.
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Do you like Info Wars?
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>tfw met perfect goddess from r9k who is everything you ever wanted
>says she loves me and wants to be with me
>everything is absolutely perfect for a few days
>suddenly: I want to break up, was just lonely b4 lol
Thanks for absolutely obliterating my heart Senpai
You know who you are
41 Posts / 6 Images
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She probably realized that she's dating a faggot from /r9k/
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did we tell you? we told you
did you listen? you didnt
you already fulfilled your job as an emotional enema and now shes out and about sucking dicks.
hope you feel good about yourself.
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>>34756344
Damn that must be it
Lemme grab the shotty
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How do you eat burgers?
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With me hands sir
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>How do you eat burgers?
I don't.
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>>34756305
NOT LIKE THAT REEEEEEEEeeeee
t. Amerifat Burgerclap
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>that fucking kid that pulled his pants down to his ankles to pee at the urinal
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>not pulling your pants all the way down
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>>34756299
Why did you look you fucking pedo, go to jail you sick fuck
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>that kid that would randomly pull his pants all the way down during recess
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THE ONE AND ONLY TIME A GIRL WANTS TO SUCK MY DICK I CANT KEEP IT HARD WHAT THE ACTUAL FUG???
I don't want to brag, I've been a robot all my life but somehow a girl got interested in me, we've been dating and she tried to blow me. I was kind of hard at first but ended up soft.
Why?
I've been jerking off once a week for the last month and I'm on noporn. I can't edge for hours and I get hard when she's kissing me, why is my dick so beta? Was I just too nervous ?
Chads of /r9k/, am I impotent?
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Lol silly gay boy
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>I've been a robot all my life but somehow a girl got interested in me, we've been dating and she tried to blow me.
thinkgen
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>>34756280
I can edge for hours*
>>34756300
Sure I jerked off to traps before but I'm off it. Ffs I get hard when I kiss her hello
>>34756307
Was expecting that comment. I'm not the worse of robots, maybe I achieved cyborghood but I scored extremely low on the normie test before I met her
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if someone asks you why the 90s was the shit, send them this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QP-SIW6iKY
you are welcome
6 Posts / 2 Images
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and not this? wtf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggiUMDccO0Y
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foyAOoVagWw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJLIiF15wjQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBpWMlkBI64
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>>34756338
Post was 10/10 till I read Spice Girls
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>>34757106
Spice girls was awesome