Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 8630. page

my hooker experience is found here. my penis had never been in a vagina previously

>>35338943

No.
I tell you what to do.

>>35339258

It was pretty awkward but the moment you get into the room with her, it's the point of no return: just take your clothes off, fold them and place them somewhere near. If she's nice she'll help you out, and maybe even tease you a little bit.


By then hopefully she'll start to suck/play with your dick until you get hard. If she doesn't just tell her to.

Then she'll put a condom on you and fuck. Her on top riding you (easy mode and you can play with her tits), doggy (my tip is for you to be standing on the edge of the bed, with her on it), and/or missionary (a little awkward until you figure out the angles, but pretty much self explanatory) are the three positions you should go for.

I told someone to kill themself and they livestreamed it afterwards
Pretty dope

When /mlp/ was just as fast as /b/.

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>tfw you're a foreigner
>tfw all your life your accent was mocked
>tfw no chance of ever getting a gf because who the fuck would want to be with the weird foreigner guy
>tfw you're the funny guy in all social cirlces
>tfw you're never taken seriously
>tfw never really formed any close relationships with people
>tfw experienced racism and prejudice

>>35339209
Stop giving shit to**
who have a hard time**
talk shit**

>>35339209
>Stop give shit for foreigner anons who have hard time with English.
>I keep seeing anon talking shits about other anons grammars mistake
>ENOUGH

what?

god that pooper must be divine

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oh my god i hope

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>>35339184
>Ivanka will be the first female president and not Hillary

"Please give me the dick"

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>>35339175
Guess I've got no choice but to say it... <3

Sensei, please stick your hard dick into Rin's naughty bitch-asspussy and fuck it as hard as you can. <3

I'll make sure my tight, wet ass makes your dick feel good, so... <3

Let's hard ass-fuck 'till we drop! <3

shoot your goo my dude

No, that part comes from the upbringing.

>>35339162
No, not even wolves are predisposed to that.

you don't seriously believe all that non-scientific bullshit made up by uneducated people based on meme life experience

Just say that everything smelt like pee and everyone refused to speak english. Also whine how everything was dubbed in french on TV.

There's dogshit everywhere. The louvre is huge, crowded, and has insufficient toilets. You didn't go up the Eiffel Tower because the queue was too long.

There's your story.

how do you even say that by accident fuck off dude

>>35339076
If you aren't straightforward, it makes it easy for a bitch to go dine with you (for your cush ofc) and then say that she thought you were just friends.

What you call "spaghetti" is actually the opposite of autism.

>>35339076
Just apologize and tell her to forget the whole episode ever happened. Never talk to her again.

>>35339070
ww2 would have happened you idiot

>>35339100
>ww2 would have happened

nuh uh, they jointly occupied it with russia

>>35339122
No you idiot, WW2 would have happened regardless because poland was the last straw and other nations didn't want to keep going with the appeasement politics. also, historians agree russia would have attacked Germany eventually even if Hitler had chose not to attack Russia.

well I would recommend not drinking

>>35339083
but it's the only thing that makes me feel human.

>>35339124
Yeah that's what all alcoholics say

>>35338994
Do this all the time anon mostly while fantasizing about they life I could have had with someone

>>35338994
Currently doing this.

I do this but it's sad

>>35338990
she was made for BBC

cant belive this isnt orignal

>>35339833
>she was made for BBC
>cant belive this isnt orignal

Yeah pol used it up too much

yet another reason men are superior

Or, you know, they could position the mouth of the jug over their urethra.
Or not be a disgusting fuck.

>>35339334
How is it really even all that gross? It's not like I leave it sitting there all day, it's just so I don't wake anybody up at night going to piss.

>>35338936
*unsheathes necronomicon*
so you think you understand memetics, kiddo?
*teleports behind u*
watch this
*unzips 10.2 inch dick*
it's actually very funny
*destroys ur soul*
that's about all, peace out

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>>35338936
>stop worshipping Jewish demons

Are Varg and Styx the Dante and Virgil of politics?

Fututre is the single-most dogshit rapper on this godforsaken planet. I do like some trap but only if I'm sufficiently high.

>>35338903
wake up inna morning all I do is trap
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKJC8JqenXo

>>35339022
future is a robot senpai, show some respek