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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5898. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

Does anyone else have one of these things?

I just ordered one. I'm pretty sure it's going to solve all of my anxiety and attention problems. Pic related is the one I ordered.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnxJjA5frzo
46 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>36735605
if you have one of these you are a normie
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>>36735605
It's like a pet rock
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>>36735605
They sell these at 7 eleven

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I was using his computer and found 4chan in a few of his suggestions. Should I just leave it be or tell him he's too young (he's 15). Are there any similar non-adult forum sites I can point him towards.
23 posts and 3 images submitted.
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4chan was founded by a fucking 15 year old. Just make sure he doesn't become a trap.
>>
>He's 15.

There's fucking 9 year olds all over /b/
>>
if you care about your brother even remotely you'd beat his ass for being an underage b& (i don't care that there's already kids here we can do nothing about, fuck having discussions with fucking idiots) and make sure he never comes back so he can have a shot at life.

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>thatfeelwhen-nogf
10 posts and 5 images submitted.
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people still care about having a gf in 2017. why tho.
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>>36735564
>that feel when nobody at all
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>>36735599
because we're not ACTUALLY ROBOTS *yet*.

so for now we still have minds 100% susceptible to their biological makeup. A makeup designed for reproduction, which is done through the opposite sex, and generally after a significant relationship has been formed.

Sans the desire to have children, the desire for affection is still there. I think a lot of anons mistake hornyness for just desire for pussy, and don't realize either because of lack of self awareness or lack of experience of affection, they don't realize what they really crave most is affection.

Ask a prostitute how many of their clients they have sex with vs how many chicken out and just end up using the prostitute as a shoulder to cry on or shitty therapist (actually any given prostitute is probably just as good as any given therapist lel)

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Any other robots totally terrified of driving? I do it every day, but every time, I feel like I am *this* close to dying in a car crash. in particular many residential roads feel so incredibly narrow and you are a hair's breath from another car or the side of the road. Also, seems like people never go the speed limit, so whenever I try to be safe and be slow, people always tailgate me and honk at me, which gets me frustrated and anxious. Today I was driving on very narrow roads that took very sharp turns, and I was going slow, but the people behind me were getting so mad.

I hate it, I hate this feeling like I'm going to die.
21 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36735526
Yo. I drive in the left lane because my route requires an exit on the left and even driving 75 in a 65 I still get passed often.
>>
>>36735526

Actually, I feel the opposite way. Driving (as long as I'm not having to deal with a bunch of shitty drivers) is one of the only times I feel really relaxed. It's just comfy driving and listening to the radio
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>>36735526
Going slow isn't safe. Making others slow down for you isn't safe. Why do nerdy fucking robots think driving like a granny is safe?

Why aren't you using Timotei yet robots?

It's been endorsed by Konata, is that not enough for you?
23 posts and 8 images submitted.
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>>36735469
can you fuck off, cunt
enough of the weeb shit.
there are 4 different boards for that
>>
>>36736692
>there are 4 different boards for that
there's a site for that
this one
if you don't like it fuck off

or go to a non-weeb exlusive board like /tv/ or /sports/ or whatever you shitfuck
>>
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>>36736812
>/sports/
>non-weeb

no.

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>Crush is giving me signs that he's into me
#20 decides what should I do
30 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>>36735411
>#20
You should fuck off with this memetier bait senpai.
>>
signs like what op? im curious how the guy is toying with you
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>>36735411
Kill yourself faggot

oregnello

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What's this called again r9k?
13 posts and 5 images submitted.
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Subtle video game clothing.
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Shilling? Pretty sure that's the right word.
>>
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>>36735383
>What's this called again r9k?
succubus (male)

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This is a penis. Why are you not sucking one, r9k?
16 posts and 3 images submitted.
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too busy getting my penis sucked by OP
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Because there isnt one this nice near me. That's the only reason.

If he has a dick that nice then he could fucking ignore me, just close his eyes and pretend I am some hot roastie.
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>>36735435
>pretend I am some hot roastie.
surely your man moans would ruin the illusion

>37. MY GIRLFRIEND'S SUCKED 37 DICKS
What would you do if you were in his situation?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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In a row?
This aint origano
>>
follow her to the parking lot
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>My exgirlfriend sucked 37 dicks.

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What's the last album you listened to /r9k/?
53 posts and 15 images submitted.
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>>36735285
If by mindles self indulgence. It's pretty edgy. A robot recommended it to me.
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>>36735285
>What's the last album you listened to

the queen is dead by the smiths

i need another great British band to get into
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>>36735285
AD:House4, diverse systems is a good label if your into weeb music they put out some nice compilation albums every year for comiket

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Please tell me it happens to you faggots too. last night I had 2. Why does this shit happen am I gonna die?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Yeah it happens to me. Shits so painful I'm pretty sure it's bc of dehydration
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>>36735376
But I don't want to get fat if I drink THAT much water.
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>>36735522
Eat some bananas. potassium helps cramps apparently idk my dads a doctor this is what he told me

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I really need to know there are other people in the world. I have become so isolated that I have lost any sense of what its like to talk to people.

Who else is in a crippling lonely state where you talk to one or less people on a regular basis, and the one person kind of dislikes if not hates you?
17 posts and 2 images submitted.
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It'll be wonderfully ironic if no one replies. I guess ill just put some music in my thread.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UzXuQbcp8Yc
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One more try.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygdVEIrVnIk
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Thank again... as usual /r9k/

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Let's make this a normie hate thread
44 posts and 4 images submitted.
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Fudehhdsfff normies reee
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>>36735149
What the fuck is that even supposed to mean? I can't keep up with nog slang at all
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FUCK THEM UP THE ASS HOLE

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> be me
> autismo homosexual
> qt 8/10 walks up to me
"Hey anon"
> start to sweat alot
"hi..."
"Im throwing a party later"
> he hands me his number
"Hope i see you there!"
> he walks away
he's gay like me and i have no clue how i was even invited to the party. I need help robots. How do i become a temporary normie? help a brother out?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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pure chance
no on actually cares about you, you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time (right?)
if you don't go no one will acknowledge your presence not being there, no one will remember.
this isn't worth getting worked up over
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>>36735141
Just be a fabulous gay stereotype for the night.

You've seen how gay guys in movies and TV act right? Your gay, you have watched glee of course. Act like that.
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>>36735193
i forgot to mention i'm in the closet

You're walking down the street when suddenly you see a LC pizza restaurant. How can you resist the delicious taste of Little Caesars pizza?
21 posts and 2 images submitted.
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HE'S BACK FOR GOOD
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>looking up from the concrete ground ever

yeah nah you can't fool me fatty
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>>36735041
Living in new york as a poor fag you get tired of eating that shit every other day


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